unconventional love

After the heavy rain, the sky was washed clean, revealing its true blue color.Pure white clouds float in the sky like clean feathers.

Today's sunshine is exceptionally good.The light is not harsh but warm, and the spots are bright.And Bai Yiqing became sober in such an environment.

The room is plain white as soon as you open your eyes, the decoration is sparse and tidy, there is a bunch of lilies by the window, with morning dew on it.And beside him, there was still someone lying on his stomach.

This person Bai Yiqing is too familiar, even just listening to his breathing and looking at his back can describe the other person's face.This ability is not controlled by Bai Yiqing at all, it is like a factory setting, it is difficult to modify.

And he was only in a daze for a few seconds, just as he was about to reveal a peaceful smile, the pain in his lower abdomen interrupted all his thoughts.

Last night's heavy rain, the gloomy weather, the cold wind blowing from the window, and those things that people don't want to remember.These memories came one after another, breaking Bai Yiqing's tranquility at the moment.

That divorce agreement...

"Hmm..." There are some things that I really can't think about, and when I think about them, I feel depressed and painful.

Bai Yiqing clutched his abdomen, frowning.Originally, Gu Yanshu was a medicine that healed people, but now it has become a poison that penetrates the intestines. Just looking at it makes him extremely uncomfortable, and his whole body hurts.

Although Gu Yanshu slept deeply, he was too sensitive to Bai Yiqing's voice.Everyone has a muscle memory, just like firefighters hearing the sirens and doctors hearing the call from the ward, Gu Yanshu woke up from his dream when he heard Bai Yiqing's muffled groan.Before he woke up, he began to hug Bai Yiqing in a daze, "Huh? What's the matter? What's wrong?"

Gu Yanshu lay on the ground for too long, and now his whole arm is numb.I cried a lot last night, and I didn't sleep much today.His eyes were swollen, and there were red marks on the sides of his face.The original clothes were all stained with blood, but now the old man bought them temporarily.His eyes were hazy, and his speech was vague, "What's the matter, my dear? Talk?"

Bai Yiqing glanced at the person in front of him, then barely looked away.Although the sky was clear, he was stuck in the quagmire of yesterday and couldn't get out.That sentence, a paragraph of experience is carved in my heart.If you think too much in your heart, it becomes difficult to control your emotions, but within a few seconds, water mist accumulates in your eyes and swirls around your eye sockets.

Bai Yiqing didn't understand, and thought: Since you hate me, why do you treat me so well?

But he couldn't ask. First, he didn't know how to ask, and second, he felt it was unnecessary.Deceiving oneself and others, bringing shame on one's own self...why should I be cheap?

And Gu Yanshu's reaction was also quick, he realized something was wrong when he saw the person's face turned.He crawled onto the bed with a limping leg, although his movements were quick but very careful, each step bypassed Bai Yiqing's body.

Bai Yiqing's eyes were moist, the tears were blown dry by the wind, and those lively eyes also began to turn red and dry.In order to control his emotions and keep himself from making a sound, these thin lips suffered a lot.

"Why are you crying?" Gu Yanshu couldn't see people crying at all, and after getting to know Bai Yiqing, he couldn't see him crying even more.I didn't feel anything after howling for a long time yesterday, but Bai Yiqing shed a few tears and almost killed him.

"Yiqing, don't cry." Gu Yanshu comforted the other party in a panic, and stretched out his hand, wanting to hug him in his arms as usual.After all, the other party used to be so obedient as long as he touched and hugged him, no matter how angry he was, he could immediately dissipate... But this... Bai Yiqing dodged it as soon as he stretched his hand halfway.

Bai Yiqing knew that the other party couldn't see tears, and he would often fake crying to tease Gu Yanshu on weekdays, but it was different now, this time it was real... He didn't want to see himself being so pretentious anymore.

"I'm fine." Bai Yiqing said softly. "It's just that the mood didn't ease up for a while, and it's a little uncomfortable."

It's not just one person who is suffering now.

His lips were pursed lightly, and his breathing suddenly became heavier.Gu Yanshu was a little unwilling to give up, and slowed down to shake Bai Yiqing's hand.As expected, he was dodged again.

A huge mountain weighed on his heart, blocking blood circulation.I couldn't breathe, and the pain was severe.

"Feel good."

"Ah."

"You're angry, aren't you?" Gu Yanshu slowly climbed off the bed, but his normally straight back and shoulders were now a little slanted.He moved while talking. "I'm sorry, I did drink too much last night, talked in a mess, and...did so much."

"I... I really drank too much yesterday, I didn't know what I said, and I was out of my mind, so I said whatever I dreamed or saw."

"I'm really...really..." Gu Yanshu lowered his head as he spoke, unable to utter a few words after stumbling.

In fact, he had already practiced in front of the mirror this morning, and he had already thought about what to say, but he couldn't say a word this time.It's not that I feel ashamed or embarrassed, I just feel that these apologies are too superficial...too fake.Gu Yanshu had never apologized a few times in his life, he didn't know how to express his guilt to others.

He doesn't know how to make people happy and how to make people angry.He has to get all his experience from the Internet, and what he does is just repeating the process of others.

In the past, when he was able to coax Bai Yiqing back, it was because Bai Yiqing let him and was willing to accept him.But now it's different, the mistake I made is really too big...

Ashamed, I don't know how to face it... Gu Yanshu scratched his head a few times with his hands, and then covered half of his face.

Everything has already been done, so what's the use of talking more?

He, Gu Yanshu, opened his mouth, but now it is useless, it might as well be a decoration.what can he doOr keep repeating last night's 'sorry' until the other person is willing to talk to him?

Bai Yiqing's expression was complicated, and his heart was very chaotic.He didn't know what to look at and what to do, so he had to look at the flowers around him and then at the scenery by the window.But no matter how he looked at it, his peripheral vision was always looking at Gu Yanshu.When seeing the other party's annoyed look, my heart still hurts.

It's really strange to like this kind of thing, inexplicably falling in love with someone, inexplicably relying on a person, inexplicably unwilling to let go...inexplicably inexplicably...

But does Gu Yanshu feel sorry for him, or the child in his stomach?This is unknown.

Bai Yiqing was a little desperate, he closed his eyes and took a few breaths. "You...don't think too much, I'm just feeling a little uncomfortable for a while, and I'll be fine in a while."

Bai Yiqing is actually very timid, he is afraid of gaining and even more afraid of losing.Just seeing a divorce agreement made him speechless in pain, so what if he listened to Gu Yanshu himself?so what?

When I was young, the adults around me praised Bai Yiqing for being sensible.This is a compliment to others, but not to Bai Yiqing.His first sensibility was to share, and his later sensibility was to not be abandoned.Just like now, he was worried about Gu Yanshu.He couldn't tell whether it was because he was more worried about the other party, or because he was afraid that he was not even more obedient and sensible.

'No one loves you, no one loves you, you're all alone all your life'... that's really scary.

Gu Yanshu was very distressed, he didn't understand why Bai Yiqing was like this, he still cared about his own emotions, couldn't this person be more selfish?

He saw Bai Yiqing's fragility, and he really wanted to hug him, to press him into his arms and comfort him carefully.But Gu Yanshu knew that Bai Yiqing didn't want to touch him now, so he wouldn't.As long as you can keep the distance at a distance that can ensure that you take care of each other.

"Then can I sit next to you?" "Tell me if you're not feeling well, tell me what you want to do, and I'll be with you." "I don't know how to apologize...it's just...I just want you to forgive me " Gu Yanshu's words, just a few words, can't be escaped after all——

"I was wrong."

Bai Yiqing listened to them one by one. Anyway, anyone can say something, but no matter how much it is said, it is not very useful.It is useful to apologize for small things, but "I'm sorry" is not a panacea, not everything can be cured.In his heart... there is only one thing... he cares most about.

"Gu Yanshu..." Bai Yiqing stopped the other party, and interrupted Gu Yanshu's chatter.

Her voice was hoarse, and there was a hint of despair in her smile... "Do you want to divorce me?"

"After giving birth to the baby."