It's not illegal

A set of half-literate rhetoric about claiming to be the emperor of heaven is so fluently memorized that Du Ling no longer thinks that Xiao Li is an ordinary psychopath. Backbone!

In the face-controlled society, religious criminals with such a face are terrifying. If this guy is released, no matter how stupid the rhetoric is, he will probably be able to circle a group of good men and women.

For the sake of social stability, Du Ling is determined to sacrifice his ego to keep the other party in prison.

Keep the meal tickets that are easy to eat and live and chatter like this for your own use, and don't let them out to harm others.

"Okay, Heavenly Emperor, yes, Heavenly Emperor, then, Your Majesty, you are responsible for burning this thing, and I will be responsible for settling the outside affairs?" Master Bird thinks that he is not surprised when he is well-informed. Heavenly Emperor is Heavenly Emperor, as a nickname Calling has not asked Chairman X to pull the wind yet.

Xiao Li didn't seem to hear the sarcasm in the parrot's unique glib tone, nodded calmly and agreed: "This is the most suitable, but you don't need to call me Heavenly Emperor Du Daoyou, just call me by my name."

Speaking of this, he seemed a little embarrassed to hesitate, but he still reminded seriously: "Because I am descending to the mortal world to experience life, so the identity of the Emperor of Heaven cannot be easily revealed. It is better not to mention me when you are in contact with monsters outside."

Xiao Li was a little ashamed, he had practiced in the mountains for no years, and he didn't feel uncomfortable when a hundred years of white clouds passed by, but now he couldn't help revealing his identity to this little bird demon in just a month, and he really was a mortal. Can't stand the loneliness?

It seems that the officials of the Heavenly Court are right. Pretending to be a mortal is indeed a good channel to hone one's will and improve one's realm. Thinking of this, Xiao Li is in awe of Du Ling's free and easy acting skills.

"..." Don't worry, I didn't intend to mention you, do you think it's an honor to let others know #我的物主是一个蛇静病#?

You are serious about teasing you, Uncle Parrot shook his head angrily, and imitated his style: "Then you can just call me Du Ling, don't call me Fellow Daoist, and reveal your identity."

People who don't understand think you are joking, but what if people who understand take you back to the mental hospital.

"This is the best." Xiao Li nodded in agreement, and he was quite satisfied with the mutual understanding. "Fortunately, Du Dao...Du Ling, you are a parrot, even if you speak normally, it will not arouse the suspicion of ordinary people."

In this regard, I also feel that my luck is quite high, my racial talent, those mutated cats and dogs are not enviable.

But just because the parrot speaks human words is so normal, no one will take the video Po online seriously... Thinking of this, Du Ling suddenly feels sorry for him, and has a strange feeling for superstitious young people who can see resentment but have no ability to exorcise evil spirits. Empathy.

Why despise the difference in worldview caused by different horizons? The fairy face is not intentional. Although the ability is insufficient, at least the heart is good.

"That's it, shall I go out first?"

In fact, Tiger Ban looked at Grandpa Ya, and Du Ling was not really in a hurry to deal with the aftermath. He just felt that he needed some space to rediscover his position as Xiao Li—it was completely different from what he thought at the beginning?Although this Xiao Shenxian looked at Yushu Linfeng's inscrutable, the inside was simply a blank sheet of paper or the kind that was cut crookedly.He has to be cautious, correcting the other party's wrong superstition and cultivating successors of scientific socialism, he also has to be careful not to expose too much hooliganism and spoil the pure flowers of the motherland.

"It's getting late, eat something first before going." Xiao Li found an old newspaper, wrapped the demon bone necklace and put it aside.Although the tone was cold, the lunch box pulled out from the innermost part of the incubator was shining with a warm and bright light: a whole box of braised short ribs, the sauce red appearance was shining with no dead ends, proclaiming its delicious invincibility.

The main dish of today's convenience store!It takes half a month to have a feast of pure meat!Master Bird, who missed both lunch and dinner, originally thought that he would regret it for the rest of his life (no)——

丿

"Hey?...!!" Thigh please let me continue hugging! (¤﹃¤)!

When the lunch box was delivered to Master Niao with starry eyes and drooling eyes, Xiao's once shattered fairy face seemed to be shrouded in a layer of holy light again.

The carnivore, who had only gnawed a few peaches for a whole day, rushed over and swallowed the small ribs one by one. The eating technique was extremely skilled, and the bones spit out were clean without a trace of meat left.When he was half full and began to savor carefully, Du Ling realized that Xiao Li was sitting patiently watching him eat, and he was a little embarrassed.

To be able to leave such a full box of ribs, it is estimated that this guy who is very principled and refuses to take advantage of the unit has eaten two vegetarian meals, but he is not good at eating leftovers at this time, so he is a little ashamed He buried his little head in the flesh again, and secretly made up his mind to treat Xiao Li better in the future.

Think again about those sugar-fried chestnuts, peanuts and melon seeds before, using the meager salary of the convenience store boy to buy snacks for a bird that he relies on, and being so meticulous that he can even detect a little bit of invisible resentment in time... This guy Although he looks cold and can't fart with three poles, he is actually a genuine warm man!

Du Ling felt that he was moved.

If I were to change to a girl, I would probably get married, but unfortunately everyone is a pure man with a big eagle and two arms that can run a horse (although the male parrot seems to have neither a dick nor two arms), so let's go together as a good brother.

Du Ling quickly made a wise decision to use these two years to train Xiao Li well, so that they can fight together to conquer the world after the end of the world.

Anyway, at that time, everyone only spoke based on their strength, and they were not afraid that the lack of a diploma would force a hero to death...

The uncle parrot who was sleepy yawned in a daze, completely unaware that his parrot beak also had its own unique way of fulfilling it.

The next day was sunny and sunny, and it was a very suitable day to learn from Lei Feng and do good deeds.

Du Ling first watched Xiao Daxian burn the demon bones, and was surprised to find that the black air disappeared completely after the burning. He remembered that in the last days, everyone's method of dealing with mutant creatures was to burn them. Even scientists proved that high temperature can sterilize them. Inactivate the infectious mutated virus... which statement is correct?

Maybe it makes sense, the black smoke and resentment may be just a kind of mutated mycelium, isn’t it the bricks of CCTV Science and Education Channel’s blockbuster program "Getting Out of Superstition" that they love to say that, there are no supernatural beings at all, it’s all about learning to scare people to death It's the fault of the scumbags who are ignorant and ignorant.

Du Ling trembled to kill Matt's head crown, so embarrassing that he didn't want to think about it any more.

He instructed Xiao Li to pack the necklace that smelled like a sticky smell into a fresh-keeping bag, grab it with one paw, and set off happily.

Of course, before putting things back, some more materials had to be added, such as a violet emerald tower chain with a price tag of 27—this is still the worst item in Duling's inventory.Another example is a piece of paper that pretends to be a ghost and can make a little girl accept this matter.

Speaking of this, it was Xiao Li's warning that gave Master Bird inspiration. Although he is such a rational and pragmatic smart person, he doesn't believe it, but girls in their early twenties are the most obsessed with mysticism, and they can completely cosplay with the relevant departments of mysterious events. The tone of voice defines the matter.

Hmm, how do ordinary civil servants speak with an official accent?

He has to search the Internet. Since he is already connected to the Internet, why not take a look at how many people have fallen into the pit at Zhalang, and whether the old Wang next door has replied to his private messages... When Du Ling happily finished the homepage and came back to his senses, The incident of the cursed ivory necklace has been finished by 818, and the actual note to be used has not yet been written.

The procrastination was so untimely that Xiaotian, who watched the whole process through the glass, dared to laugh at him as an illiterate handicap.

Heh, a mere erha dares to watch my jokes, be careful I won't rebroadcast the follow-up for you!

After hastily finishing the handling notice from the "Spiritual Incident Safety Administration", Du Ling, who had become a bird, was naturally relieved, and threw a wing to Erha with a proud back.

However, he did not come to play with this bastard on the tower for a long time afterwards. It was not that Du Ling was really that stingy, but that the twists and turns in the follow-up of this incident made people caught off guard——

At the very beginning, Du Ling's plan was particularly successful. As a bird, it could accurately drop small packages onto the trance-like white-collar workers without leaving a single feather behind.

And the little white-collar girl who was desperate also accepted this setting, and she cried like a fool because of her wish that the cat owner beat it, and she quickly resigned after she settled with the cat owner with little money and money, and wanted to clean up and start a new life By the way, coax Eunuch Ya back home.

... That's right, after two days of wandering away from home, the sticky father-in-law who had escalated his adultery with Tiger Banner was unwilling to go back to that cramped and brutal little room.

In order to pursue love, people would rather be a dusty and dirty wild cat.

But Eunuch Ya didn’t say that himself, what others said was that freedom is priceless, he only wishes to climb trees to catch butterflies in his free time, and doesn’t want to be a princess in a hut—this guy can write doggerel, Master Bird is also a bird The shock frightened the feathers off the ground.

But Tiger Banner told him privately that Yagonggong was actually worried that he would go crazy again. Since he was controlled by that strange bead and saw blood, he often had the urge to attack, and he was afraid that he would not be able to make another one even if he went home. A pet cat that can make little girls happy.

"It's better to let Jing Jing forget me, and we can leave a good memory for each other..." Ya Gonggong sighed sadly but firmly, but when Tiger Ban meowed and learned from Master Bird, Du Ling was very angry. Hearing the gloating of his rival's unexpected exit.

...Your city cats can also play.Du Ling couldn't help lamenting that his relationship was not as slender as a pair of cats, no wonder he had been single all his life in his previous life.

However, as a good brother who takes the lead and is considerate of his subordinates, Du Ling still agreed to use his ability to fly to help Ya Gonggong observe the current situation of the former mistress. Place to date?"

This wasteland is very inaccessible. Rusty and abandoned building materials are piled up high. It is good that children are not allowed to play, but you are not the only ones who will find this!

When I wanted to hide my own body back then, Master Bird, I already realized——

That's right, this wasteland that has experienced the battle of splashing water and salt to exorcise evil spirits is exactly the cemetery that Du Ling chose (?) for himself.

Back then, he braved the heavy snow to grope and bury the corpse in the middle of the night, but now weeds grow tall on the flat ground, and even he himself can't tell where it was buried, but he still can't remember wrongly that it was buried in this place.

Du Ling remembered that he was very afraid of being discovered at the time, so he dug a hole nearly 2 meters deep in a moment of nervousness, and now even if he plowed the entire field, he might not find it.He dug himself and buried himself and forgot where he buried it. He felt that he could be regarded as No. 1 in the history of funerals.

But anyway, he didn't really go to the underworld to report, and he didn't need to leave a grave to burn paper for incense, so when Du Ling found out that he couldn't find it, he was quite open to it, as long as he didn't bother with dogs, cats, and men, and OOXX on his grave!

This requirement is very low, right?

However, Huban couldn't understand his painstaking efforts at all, and insisted that this was the first time he had intimate contact with his relative Xiaoya, and he wanted to not only keep using it, but also pass it on to his children and grandchildren.

Du Ling, who didn't want to discuss with it the topic that one male and one eunuch can't have babies at all, could only threaten him from the dark side: "Fengshui treasure land? Is it a treasure land where dead bodies are buried?"

"Meow?" Corpse?

How could the tabby, which considers itself a big monster, be afraid of death? Instead, it proudly raised its tail and walked to a particularly thick grass, stretched out its paws and paved the soft ground: "Meow meow meow?" Is this it?It was a bit smelly and I covered it with soil again.

A half-rotten hand bone poked its head out of the slightly blackened damp soil.

Fuck -! ? ? ?

It was agreed that it would be buried so deep that it would not be discovered?

Or is there a genius burying the dead here besides me? ?

Du Ling was so frightened that he exploded into a badminton ball, rushed over and quickly dug up the floating soil to prove it.

Well, just by looking at the ugly poop-yellow sweater sleeves, you know that this is really his own corpse. Du Ling stopped his paws and stared blankly at 'his' half-rotten arm.

He clearly remembered that he dug the pit extremely deep, and after burying it, the covering soil was rammed extremely firmly. It is absolutely impossible to run to the ground by himself in just one month?

Is there such a tiny crustal movement?

Or is it that the corpse crawled out by itself... Du Ling was horrified at the thought of this, but his legs were so stiff that he couldn't even move.

As a bird that is afraid of ghosts, he was scared as dumb as a textbook.

So he didn't realize as soon as possible that the two little friends whose noses are tens of thousands of times more sensitive than parrots could not stand the smell of corpses and ran away, let alone remember that there is a girl who will be killed by curiosity in the past few days Strolling around looking for cats all over the neighborhood...

When a figure enveloped him, it was too late to escape, and Du Ling couldn't even let out a scream, because the person who came was more frightened and screamed louder than him——

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!"