Vocal fetish

The sound of Buddha is curling up, and the sandalwood is lingering.

The one hundred and eight Buddhist beads in his hand were already shiny, and each one contained a dark red color.These are not the best beads, but it is because the people who made the beads are careful, so each one looks warm and beautiful.

It has been 23 years since Wen Quran passed away. Every year one month before Wen Quran's death, Yi Sheng would put aside all his affairs and go to a temple to read scriptures for a month to pray for Wen Quran.

23 years, 23 months, 690 days, every morning, noon and night.Up to now, he has recited the scripture for blessing more than 2000 times.It took 23 years, from being unfamiliar and clumsy at the beginning, to being familiar with it now.

Yi Changhua thought countless times, if there really was such a theory of reincarnation after death, then Qu Ran should have grown into a young man who was as lovable as before.If this is the case, then he really hoped that the Buddha, for the sake of his piety, would bless Qu Ran in this life without illness and worry.

"Amitabha, Master Yi, don't come here without any harm."

"Amitabha, the abbot is paying respects."

Yi Changhua stopped fiddling with the prayer beads, stood up and clasped his hands together, and bowed to the people who came in.

The visitor was dressed in an orange-red monk's robe and a cassock of argentine color, with fine and unique golden embroidery patterns.This cassock is a symbol of status, as Yi Changhua said, the person in front of him is the abbot of this temple—even though he has a handsome face that is too young.

When Yi Changhua first stepped into this monastery 23 years ago, the person in front of him was this young face.Until today, 23 years later, there is no trace of aging on this man's face.

This dignified and handsome face seems to be nostalgic for time, and it will always stay at the most beautiful moment.This magical and handsome monk is obviously full of seductive mystery, but Yi Changhua is never moved by it.

"Benefactor Yi doesn't need to be too polite. The poor monk just came to bother me because he suddenly felt that the benefactor seemed to have realized something." The handsome monk smiled slightly, lifted up his robe and sat cross-legged on the cattail mat beside Yi Changhua. Seeing him sitting down, Chang Hua sat back cross-legged herself.

"I didn't realize anything, it's just that some time ago... I learned something, and I saw something, which made the host laugh."

"Then, has Donor Yi looked away from some people?" The young monk looked directly into Yi Changhua's eyes, and the beads in his hand began to roll one by one with his fingers, "Donor He, this time, there is no one." Accompany."

Seeing that he mentioned He Xiao, Yi Changhua's heart suddenly turned cold, and there was even a hint of hostility in his eyes.

"Look, the benefactor is enlightened, but he is also crazy."

"The disciple is dull, and doesn't understand what the abbot is talking about." Yi Changhua lowered his eyes, avoiding the gaze of the handsome monk in front of him.

With a long sigh and a Buddha's name, the handsome monk stopped facing Yi Changhua who was avoiding his eyes. He turned around and faced a Buddha statue enshrined in Yi Changhua's wing room, and began to chant scriptures in a low voice .

What he recited was the Medicine Master Sutra that Yi Changhua had recited more than 23 times in the past 2000 years.This is the first time since Yi Changhua entered this temple, he chanted scriptures with the abbot here.

When he walked in here 23 years ago with a string of Buddhist beads given to him by Wen Quran, the handsome monk in front of him recognized the Buddhist beads in his hand at a glance.He said that this string of Buddhist beads came from his hands and was given to a predestined person.Unexpectedly, when we met again, the beads changed hands, and the predestined person became a pile of dust.After speaking, he ordered the disciples of the monastery to take Yi Changhua to a wing room, and presented him with a copy of the "Medicine Master Sutra".

This thought is 23 years.

After chanting, the sky outside the house gradually darkened. According to the previous arrangement, at this time Yi Changhua should have finished his evening fast in the wing room and was getting ready to rest.

But today, it will obviously take some time.

"Benefactor Yi still remembers the predestined person named Wen who is the poor monk."

"The disciple is reading it. For him, the disciple never dares to forget, nor does he want to forget."

Hearing Yi Sheng's answer, the handsome monk was neither angry nor angry nor sad or happy.He just closed his eyes and continued to move the beads in his hand.

"Taoism has a saying that everyone has three souls and seven souls. Buddhism also says this. The "Ksitigarbha Ten Kings Sutra" says that the consciousness opened in Alaya is the three souls, and the seven turns of consciousness are the vigor. The three souls, Consciousness of fetal light karmic soul, spiritual consciousness of soul turning from ghost spirit, spiritual consciousness of soul of phase spirit; seven souls, spiritual consciousness of bird Yin soul (tongue consciousness), heavenly thief soul consciousness (ear consciousness), non-poison soul consciousness (Eye Consciousness), Corpse Consciousness (Body Consciousness), Smelly Lung Consciousness (Nose Consciousness), Purifying Poor Consciousness (Consciousness), and Dead Corpse Consciousness (Mana Consciousness). Everyone in the world has three souls Seven souls, one is indispensable, and more is not enough. But Master Yi, from the moment you stepped into our temple 23 years ago, I knew that you are different from ordinary people."

The monk's words were like a magnificent and complicated scripture. Yi Changhua was a little dazed when he heard it for the first time. He didn't know what the other party meant, but somehow... had a strange expectation.

The monk continued without waiting for Yi Changhua to ask a question.

"Ordinary people have three souls and seven souls, neither more nor less. But Yi Shizhu, you have one more soul. This soul makes Master Yi not entangled in illness, and his eyes are clear and not deceived by evil spirits. But where did it come from, and why? But for this, only you, Yi Shizhu, understand. Although Yi Shizhu’s love is not over, but this love is over, and the love thread is broken. Those people and things, the donor can just ignore them. If you can’t see them, the future will surely Big mistake."

After the words were finished, the handsome and dignified monk stood up and smoothed his sleeves, and after saying the Buddha's name, he turned and walked out of the room.

The little monk Mi who delivered the food at the door waited for a long time. After he saw the person in the red cassock coming out of the room, he came in with a meal for Yi Changhua.

The night is over, the day is bright.

One month in the past three years of No.20.

The next day, the driver who had been arranged for a long time came to the monastery to pick up Yi Changhua, but their destination was not Yi Zhai, but Wen Quran's tomb, which he had never visited for 23 years.

City L is not far away, it only takes more than two hours by plane.Yi Changhua has long been familiar with the address of Wen Quran's tombstone.But because of the misunderstanding that lasted for 23 years, Yi Changhua, who mistakenly thought that Wen Quran had always hated him, never dared to set foot on the land where he was buried, no matter how much Yi Changhua missed him.

But now, here he is.

When Yi Changhua came to the Eastern Suburb Cemetery in L City accompanied by his driver, he happened to meet Wen Shun and Yi Sheng who came to worship Wen Quran.

Yi Changhua was not surprised at all, because today is Wen Quran's death day.What surprised Yi Changhua was the book Wen Shun held in his arms.

"Uncle Yi, you have come to see my father." Wen Shun greeted Yi Changhua friendly, "Is this your first time here?"

"Well," Yi Changhua nodded, "I was afraid to visit him before, because I was afraid...he would hate me."

Hearing Yi Changhua's words, Wen Shun showed a little sadness on his face, and then, as if he had decided on something, he handed the book he had been holding in his arms to Yi Changhua.

"I originally wanted to burn it in front of my father's tomb, but I never had the heart. Thinking about it now, it's best to leave it to you."

Yi Changhua took the book from Wen Shun with trembling hands, and when he turned to the last page that he wrote, he saw at a glance that there was an extra ink blue under the line he wrote. handsome handwriting.

It's not very long or touching, because it's just one word - good.

When you finish this book, I will take you home.

it is good.

This is a 23-year wait and a 23-year missed response.

"Okay, Wen Shun, let's go back. Auntie is still at home waiting for us to go back for dinner. Today is also your birthday, don't forget." Yi Sheng reminded, holding Wen Shun's shoulder.

Quran's death day is this child's... birthday?

Yi Changhua suddenly realized that when he and Wen Shun met for the first time, Wen Shun hadn't reacted to Yi Sheng's overly similar appearance from the beginning to now.Thinking about it now, does Wen Shun not care at all, or is he unable to care because he can't see anything?

Yi Changhua, who has enough experience and rich knowledge, remembered a book he had read by accident, which mentioned a strange disease that could not be cured—face blindness.

"Ordinary people have three souls and seven souls, no more and no less. But Yi Shizhu, you have one more soul. This soul makes Master Yi don't get sick, and his eyes are clear and not deceived by evil..."

The monk's words reverberated in Yi Changhua's mind, and Yi Changhua held his heart that was speeding up suddenly, and suddenly smiled with satisfaction.

"This was given to me by your father. As a return gift for this book, it is yours now." Yi Changhua took off the prayer beads wrapped around his wrist and put it on for Wen Shun, "Go home early, don't let me go home." Let your mother worry, I'll take another look at Quran here."

Wen Shun nodded, said goodbye and left the cemetery with Yi Sheng.When he was about to walk out of the cemetery, Yi Sheng, who had been closely following Wen Shun, stopped suddenly. Yi Sheng's unnatural pause made Wen Shun feel a little strange.

"What's wrong?" Wen Shun asked.

Yi Sheng quickly looked away from Wen Shun's question, "It's nothing, let's go, don't keep our mother waiting."

Wen Shun's heart was warmed by Yi Sheng's "our mother", and he forgot to continue to delve into the question just now.

He didn't know that at the end of Yi Sheng's eyes, there was a tomb guard who was almost exactly the same as He Xiao's back, staggering.

And the cemetery guard was carrying water, step by step, walking towards the cemetery they had just left.

Some things, some people, have you looked away, benefactor?

I saw it and understood it.

Suddenly there was the sound of a wooden barrel falling to the ground behind him.

Then, there was that sound——

"Mr. Yi."

Postscript - Forever in my life

"Voice Fetish" is finally over, thank you to all the little friends who can insist on watching now.

If you still have some free time, please listen to my gossip if you don't mind the trouble -w-

The inspiration of "Voice Fetish" comes from the author's personal experience. Of course, the author has no prosopagnosia or facial paralysis.

The author has always liked playing games, MMORPG, FPS, MG, ACG... all kinds of games will be eaten as long as they look pleasing to the eye.The author also likes to listen to songs, and as long as they are pleasing to the ear, all kinds of songs are welcome.

One time, the author fell in love with a Chinese singer because of a line in a song recommended in a random playlist (ah~ don’t get me wrong, it’s just a simple idol type). After that, the author embarked on a long-term fan girl career .

Then, shortly before the writing of this article, the author came into contact with an FPS game under the recommendation of a friend.

By the way, the author likes games but it doesn’t mean that he plays well, especially FPS games are simply a cancer that hinders his career == So my friend had no choice but to find a great friend to take us to fly together, hold our thighs or something ╮(╯_ ╰)╭

Then the author was about to start the career of hugging thighs, but what he didn't expect was that the great god my friend found... was the Chinese man who the author had been fascinated by for a long time (hereafter referred to as the male god for short).Because there is a microphone to communicate when playing the game, so the author recognized the voice immediately.The voice of the male god is very recognizable, and after adding each other as Q friends, after reviewing the information, I am even more sure that the great god in the friend's mouth is the male god himself.

The above is the driving force behind the creation of "Voice Obsession".Ah, by the way, I am his fan girl, the author has not revealed it so far.

Life is always full of surprises. The author likes the feeling of being alive and cherishes such an experience very much.

Because any happiness and surprises that come from life will make the author feel the meaning and value of life.I believe that many people have the same feeling as the author, but for a person suffering from depression, this feeling will be more important, because it will be the most powerful way for him to overcome those dark thoughts in his heart. arms.

Just like me.

Writing stories is a way I've always used to vent my stress, and there's no one around me to confide in.

My friends, lovers, all left me because of my deepening symptoms.I don't blame them. After all, no normal person likes to be around a madman who suddenly becomes hysterical and has a weird personality when he doesn't know when.

My family is very concerned about me, but they can't understand what the so-called 'depression' is, and what kind of person is a 'depressed patient'.Seeing how they cared but couldn't do anything about it, I felt guilty and sad countless times.

Tried to see a doctor, but doctors and meds are not doing much to help me anymore.I even began to hate those doctors who put on a face of 'I know everything' in front of me and the packs of bitter pills. .

I think, maybe I am alive, not only a burden to myself, but also a burden to those around me who love me.I can't bring them happiness, or even deepen their pain. What is the meaning of my existence in this world?

I didn't know where to look for answers like this, so I tried to read all kinds of books and talk to all kinds of people.

Then, many stories appeared in my mind, happy, sad, painful... But I seem to have been looking for the wrong way.

Because I found that the more I know, the more I understand, the more I can't find the answer to my original question, and my heart will become heavier instead.

A month ago, I suddenly realized that this might be my limit.

So every day since then, I have treated it as if it were the last day of my life.During this month, I did a lot of things that I wanted to do but never did.

Draw a picture you like, go to a place you want to go, write a story you want to write, and say something you never dare to say.

Three weeks ago I wrapped up my journey, two weeks ago I finished painting a poppy, a week ago I confessed to others my four-year-old depression, and now I’m done writing this story that I love.

I think, next I'm going to start another journey.

This time I'm the only one on the road, with an unknown landscape ahead, and maybe there will be the answer I've always wanted.

I thought, if I'm lucky enough to come back.

I will continue to tell stories for you, and I will continue to write stories for myself.

For now, let's just say goodbye.