Brocade tears

Sui'er tidied up the books scattered on the floor, and when he walked slowly into the study, Meng Kuang was just tidying up the things on the desk, as if quietly stuffing a piece of paper into his sleeve.

She turned around, saw Sui'er standing behind her, pointed to the armchair behind the desk, and said:

"Just sit here and watch, I'm sleepy, I'll go to sleep first."

After finishing speaking, he sat down beside Luo Han's bed, spread out the blanket and got into it, facing the inside, fell asleep silently, and ignored Sui'er.Sui'er pursed her lips, followed her words and sat behind the desk, adjusted the oil lamp shade to cover the light shining towards her, and gathered the light in front of her.

She couldn't help looking up at her, and seeing her lying motionless on the Arhat's bed, her heart was filled with thoughts.Then she opened the "Han Yuefu Poetry Collection", and the song "Thinking" really fascinated her.Thinking of the first night when she returned to Meng's house, maybe she was also like herself now, sitting behind this desk and waiting for dawn.When the sky was slightly bright, I couldn't stand it any longer and went out of the house, waving the sword to vent my complicated thoughts.

Is it like this, Sui Er really hopes that Meng Kuang is as she guessed, and that she is not self-indulgent.

"Don't call me Brother Kuang." Suddenly, her words echoed in her ears again, Sui'er stared at her eyes and thought.Why didn't he want to call her "Brother Kuang" by himself? Maybe it's so complicated that it's hard for outsiders to understand.But Sui Er can understand a thing or two, nothing more than depression and sadness.After all, she is still a woman, and she is always called "brother" by people, and she is constantly reminded that she is actually a woman disguised as a man, and it is inevitable that she is angry.The real brother Kuang has a home now and can't return home. She wanders out of town and doesn't know when she will return. In fact, she also misses her brother very much. She always hears her "Brother Kuang" and it will inevitably arouse feelings of sadness.

Besides, it's okay for others to call her like this, but it's me who calls her, and I feel a little more blocked in my heart.If it wasn't for her, she wouldn't have caused her second brother to leave home, and it was difficult for her to return to her normal life by disguising herself as a man.I am indeed a little shameless, ignorant of empathy, and too abrupt.

Thinking of this, I can't help but feel a little annoyed.She shouted that out of a simple correspondence between "Sister Qing" and "Brother Kuang" before.But, how should I call her?The small question of titles has become her biggest worry right now.How much she wanted to have a few words with her, what should she do if she is always so stiff?If you can't have a title that pleases her, it's really impossible to say a thousand words.

She braced her chin and stared at the man lying sideways on the Arhat bed in the dark, feeling a sense of resentment in her heart.This person's temper is really bad, fierce, and the gentle and considerate sister Qing is really gone.Maybe it's because of all the hardships in the army these years. If you have a good temper, don't you want to be bullied?What's more, she had to conceal her identity, so she had to be fierce to distance herself from others.For a long time, I have been stuffy in my heart, and it is inevitable that it will be like this now.

Speaking of which...she really has no flaws when she pretends to be a man. If she doesn't show her face, it's really hard to think that she is a woman.Thinking of this, the scene when she took off the mask to herself for the first time in the cold temple on a snowy night came to mind. The beautiful woman's face in the past is now three points more heroic and seven points handsome , really nice.If you don't think that she is a woman, she should be a peerless beautiful man.

Her physique is really rare among women.He was half a head taller than himself, and he wrapped himself in his arms as soon as he stretched out his arms.The strength on her body is also great, pinching her, pulling her, hugging her, really can't resist at all.But it's not as disgusting as the man's turbidity, and there is always a faint herbal fragrance on his body, probably because the family runs a medicine shop.I really hold you in my arms, but it is inexplicably gentle.The embrace is warm and melting, like the warm sun in the winter.Occasionally, she will show a bit of the shyness of her daughter's family, which is really cute.

Thinking of Sui'er's cheeks burning up here, she thought to herself that she really didn't know why, what was she thinking here.

Subconsciously, she fanned her cheeks with her hands, and finally turned her eyes back to the book, and laughed at herself: Are you here to study, or to read her?

She briefly flipped through Han Yuefu, but right now she was not interested in "Lu Shi Chun Qiu" and "Jin Si Lu".When she got up, she wanted to find another book to read, her eyes slowly swept across the bookshelf, and finally landed on a book called "Hua Jian Ji". She was so excited that she raised her hand to take it down.As soon as she opened it, it was Wen Tingyun's fourteen Bodhisattvas. The second "Bodhisattva: Poli Pillow in the Water Essence Curtain" immediately attracted her attention.She read this poem repeatedly, feeling as if her heart was being clutched, her heart full of knots.

There are quite a few pillows in the water essence curtain, and the warm fragrance makes people dream of mandarin duck brocade.The willows on the river are like smoke, and the geese are flying in the waning moon.The autumn color of the lotus root is light, and people win and cut it.The temples are fragrant and red, and the jade hairpin has the upper hand.

Can't help but sit back at the desk, spread out the paper, pick up the pen and ink, and carefully transcribe the poem on the paper.After transcribing, I stopped reading, and lay on the table, staring at the poem, chanting it over and over again in my heart.I don't know when the drowsiness came slowly, and she was gradually falling asleep.

She vaguely dreamed of that warm winter day in previous years, in the small courtyard of the Meng family, the young Meng An was turning the flower rope beside her, the sound of her second brother Meng Kuang reading in her ears, and Aunt Zhao was cooking in the kitchen scent.Sister Qing was sitting next to her, leaning against her tightly, holding her hand with a warm hand, and asking her if she was cold.She smiled happily and said that I am not cold with you.It seems... It seems that there is an old woman reeling and spinning sitting by the courtyard gate in the distance. gaze at her.

Tears slowly wet the eye sockets, I don't know that I am a guest in the dream, and I am greedy for a long time.

In the haze, she seemed to be picked up by someone, her body floated up in the air, a pair of arms carried her vigorously, and then put her into a soft place.She opened her eyes in a daze, and she could see the familiar figure of Sister Qing.In a trance, she couldn't recognize whether she was in a dream or in reality, so she just let her put herself on the arhat bed, lay on her side, and wrapped herself in a warm quilt.She snorted comfortably, thinking that it would be great if she could never wake up again.

The man seemed to be sitting by the bed for a while, Sui'er didn't hear her leaving footsteps.After a while, rough fingers gently wiped the tears from the corners of her eyes.With a soft sigh, she stood up, blew out the oil lamp, and the study was completely plunged into darkness.The sound of footsteps sounded softly, and she left slowly, just like the Meng family who had brought her infinite warmth in the past. The long separation and the passage of time made them fade out of her life and erected a barrier between them .

"Don't go..." she said out loud, and finally realized that she woke up and was in reality.

The man seemed to be stiff and not moving.

"Will you stay with me?" she begged.

The man didn't answer, Sui'er waited for a while before she came back and sat down on the bed again.In the quiet and dark night, there is an indescribable ambiguity pervading.This situation is just like the situation where the two of them reunited after nine years of separation. They both seem to be hidden in a dark dream, and it is difficult to distinguish the truth. Be completely seen by the other party.

"How about I call you Brother Thirteen?" Sui Er finally broke the silence and asked softly.

"Anything you want." She replied, with a hint of a smile in her voice.She seemed to like this title very much, and Sui'er couldn't help but feel relieved.

"I beg you something."

"..."

"Don't be angry all the time, it's not good for your health."

"When did I get angry?"

"When are you not angry? Especially when you see me."

"I...I didn't." Meng Kuang argued.

Really stubborn, Sui'er relied on the dark night to not hide her smile.

"You said I was angry, but you told me what happened. Why are you always ambiguous and secretive?" Meng Kuang was really angry and couldn't help it.

"I've already told you everything I can tell you so far. I'm not lying, but you don't believe me." After a moment of silence, Sui Er said.

She heard Meng Kuang take a deep breath, as if trying to suppress her anger, showing complete helplessness.

"Next, Guo Tou will investigate the things you said today, should they all be true?" She said.

"Well, he can only find out what I said, and there will be no discrepancy." Sui'er said.

"Is there anything else you can't tell me?" Meng Kuang asked.

"If I could tell you, I would have already."

"I don't understand. Will those things involve me? Or do you not believe me?"

"Those things have nothing to do with you, but mine. I don't want to involve you."

"You don't want to tell me, how can I believe you..."

"Am I that untrustworthy?" There was a trace of grievance in her voice.

Meng Kuang stopped talking.

After a while, she finally opened her mouth and said, "I'm a soldier. I speak straight when I have something to say. In my heart, you are no longer the innocent Sui'er nine years ago. I can't see through you. To be honest, you Today's question and answer with Guo Tou made it impossible for me to trust you easily. You are too smart, but I am a stupid person. I will only check it out according to the rules. Doubt everything, and prove it little by little. My only strength is stubbornness, and I will never give up if I don’t agree with my goal, so whether you tell me or not, I will find out.”

"You can't find out. I haven't checked out many things myself." Sui'er sighed, "You are no longer the sister Qing nine years ago in my heart, but now you are the thirteenth brother, ruthless and fierce Brother Thirteen."

Meng Kuang: "..."

Sui'er chuckled and added: "And it's really a bit silly."

"You...you go to sleep, it's really getting late." Meng Kuang's voice sounded a little embarrassed.

"I sleep here, where do you sleep?" Spike asked.

"The bed in the bedroom is my bed, so I naturally go back to sleep."

"That bed is cold." Sui'er said, this Arhat's bed is really warm, it was Meng Kuang who warmed up, so he lay in it.Thinking of this, Sui'er's face became hot again.

"I'm not afraid of the cold." Meng Kuang's answer really made people laugh, and she should be embarrassed.

In the end, the thirteenth brother, who was not afraid of the cold, was an extremely shy person, so he "escaped" from the study and went to sleep in the dormitory.Sui'er was alone in the Arhat bed, wrapped in the warm herbal fragrance, as comfortable as being in her arms.At this moment, her heart seemed to be covered with a ball of sweet cotton wool, and she felt more and more that she was an inexplicable and shameless woman.Why do you always have some unreasonable thoughts about Sister Qing?

It's just a pity that she couldn't tell the truth to her after all.