mentally and physically

Near noon, the sun was still shining brightly, like golden cicada wings coming in from the kitchen window, dancing around Xuan Feng and Wang Rang.

Xuanfeng cuts potatoes in front of the cabinet, and uses them to braise with beef cubes.In fact, he was already very tired, but considering that Wang Rang had finally come back and was going to leave again in the afternoon, he wanted to cook him a meal with his own hands.

Wang Rang put his arms around his waist, stood behind him, put his head on his neck, kissed or rubbed him from time to time, making Xuanfeng laugh.

"Don't touch me, it's so itchy." Su Feng said, pausing the knife in his hand, turning his head to look at him and persuading him: "Aren't you hungry? I can't cut vegetables like you. When will the vegetables be fried?" ? Go to the living room and wait, don't bother me."

Wang Yang only thinks that Xuanfeng's serious look is very cute at this time, and he is not hungry anymore.He kissed Xuan Feng's nose, and then said: "I love you." The answer was wrong.

Because of this, Xuan Feng remembered the situation when he came back last time, his heart was shocked, and he began to panic for some reason.

Wang Rang said to himself: "I ate oatmeal to fill my stomach before, but I don't feel hungry now. Don't rush to do it, let me accompany you more."

Xi Feng turned his head and continued cutting vegetables, his mind was full of the three words he said before, and he didn't hear the words after that.

Seeing that he didn't object, Wang Rang continued to hug him, and after a while, he said, "I love you."

Because of this, Xuanfeng's mind was noisy, and his heart was even more flustered.

"I love you." Like a looping recording, Wang Yang couldn't stop.

A silk thread wrapped around Xuan Feng's heart, and it was pulled tighter and tighter, and suddenly the thread broke, and then he cut his finger, and the blood flowed out.

"So much blood!" Wang Yang panicked.

Wang Yang pulled him to sit down at the dining table, hurriedly found the medicine box, found alcohol and cotton swabs, and cleaned and disinfected his fingers.

Xuanfeng's wound was deep and long. Wang Yang felt distressed and couldn't help blaming himself, "It's all my fault. I should have listened to you just now and not bothered you."

Apologies always happen after the incident, so what are you doing before the incident?Why don't you think it over and think it through?Apologizing doesn't help, it's futile.

But some mistakes are not intentional mistakes, but unintentional mistakes. Those who make mistakes are very sincere in apologizing, so who can blame them?

Xuan Feng said: "It's not your fault, it's my carelessness."

"It's not my fault!!!"

If you get to the bottom of it, it is indeed Wang Yang's fault.

Wang Rang bandaged his fingers, then held his hand and looked at it carefully, the more he looked at it, the more distressed he was.

"I'm not going to do it anymore. I'll have more opportunities to eat in the future. Don't be in a hurry. For this meal, let's eat takeaway."

"It's not the first time I've cut my hands." Fengfeng said with a light smile, "When I first learned how to cook, it was often like this. I'm used to it, so I don't need to order takeaway."

Wang Yang was putting the alcohol swab back into the medicine box. Hearing this, he lowered his head, "Are you saying this to make me feel more distressed?"

Of course not.It's just that ideals and reality can't match, rampage, self-pity and self-pity are useless, so they have to bow to reality.

No matter what Wang Yang said, he would not let him do it anymore, and the two of them had a big meal delivered by the delivery boy at noon.

After the big meal, Xuan Feng collected leftovers, lunch boxes and soup bowls, put them into garbage bags, and threw them away. Wang Yang didn't want to be a free eater, so he went with him.

The two chatted, laughed and went to take out the trash and came back again, just like last time.After returning, Xuanfeng panicked even more.

Wang Yang asked, "Are you working these days? Has anything special happened?"

Su Feng was absent-minded and didn't hear what he said.

Wang Yang waited for a long time but didn't get a reply. Looking back at him, he was sitting on the sofa blankly, wondering what he was thinking.

Wang Yang didn't have to listen to what he answered, if he didn't want to say, he respected his wish.He only wants him to love himself.

He turned on the TV, chose a soap opera to chat with, then went to sit on the sofa and pulled Xuanfeng into his arms.

Xuan Feng put one hand on his shoulder, put his head against his neck, leaned lazily in his arms, and watched the TV carelessly with his eyes half closed.

"Tired?"

Wang Rang pinched Xuanfeng's face.Huo Feng immediately hugged the arm of his hand, and pressed him even tighter.

"Tired! I'm so tired that I don't want to say anything anymore, it's all your fault." Xuanfeng said, rubbing the tip of his nose against his neck, teasing him, and he laughed.

Xuan Feng said angrily: "You are not tired, you are still so energetic."

"I'm holding back." Wang Yang said with a little jealousy: "I haven't been back for so many days, so I can only eat when I come back. Can't I be full?"

Xi Feng didn't hear anything other than flirtatious words and jokes, so he didn't answer him.

The intimacy scene was playing on the TV, so Wang Yang recalled the first time he and Xi Feng watched a pornographic film, it was in Zuo Feng's bedroom.

Unlike Wang Rang, who has a strict father, and Xi Feng, who has a mother who takes his son as the center of his life and needs to be around around the clock, Zuo Feng's parents are away all year round, so they have no time to discipline him, let alone discipline him.

For adolescent children, being restrained was the most annoying thing. At that time, their friends envied him. If there was anything inconvenient to do at home, they would go to his house to complete it, and his house became their secret base.

That day, the three of them hadn't planned to watch pornography, but a sudden rain forced them to cancel their spring outing plan.The three of them spent the whole afternoon working at home, getting moldy in their idle time, and Zuo Feng had a sudden whim to play tricks on Xuan Feng, and this happened.

At that time, Xuan Feng was 16 years old. Generally, a boy of his age has never seen pornography, but he didn't.After Zuo Feng took Wang Rangzhi away, he took Xuan Feng to his bedroom, saying that he wanted to take him to learn a lot, but in fact he was making fun of him, but he really learned a lot.

When Wang Yang came to the bedroom, Xuan Feng stared at the TV with his eyes wide open with an expression of discovering novelty, while Zuo Feng leaned forward and backward with a smile.

Xi Feng is a bit slow and developed late.He watched the pornography purely out of curiosity, and didn't react at all, but the other two were different. In the end, Zuo Feng couldn't bear it and turned off the TV, it was his own crime.

After the rain stopped, Wang Yang sent Xi Feng home.On the way home, Xuanfeng asked him a lot of questions about sex|love.He was really curious, but Wang Yang didn't want to say too much, for fear that he would slip up when he got home.

Wang Yang remembered that he asked a question at that time, why do people do such things if they don't want to have children, Wang Yang replied that it was an expression of emotion.

The channeling and divergence of emotions is based on emotion. If you don’t love, you don’t do it. You do it because of love. It’s a natural behavior when love is strong.

From an adult's point of view, such an explanation is naive and ridiculous.In the world of adults, many people don't do sex and don't love, many people don't necessarily do it if they love it, and don't necessarily love it if they do it.

For the sake of fame, profit, money, and to vent the needs of the body, people always have reasons to do so, insulting the sanctity of marriage and the sanctity of love.

Human beings claim to be the masters of this world, but such people are rotting in this world.

Wang Rang thinks so, not because he is so noble, but because his relatives, friends, colleagues, acquaintances or not acquaintances are all like this, and he doesn't want to be like them.

After noon, Xuanfeng hadn't come to work yet, so Fang Yang called Xuanfeng nervously and asked him if he would come, and the answer he got was no, so her heart fluttered even more.

She struggled with her conscience all night, and by this time, she could not concentrate on completing the task assigned by Wang Yang.

Is she still thinking of doing this?Is your own future important, or is your loyalty to Xuanfeng more important?She completely ignored the basic principles of being a human being, and she was not loyal to Xuan Feng at all.

Most of the reasons for her obedience to Xuan Feng are due to the helplessness of reality and Xiao Min's brainwashing. She is subjected to more severe persecution and greater temptation. These can easily disintegrate. resigned, so in the end she decided to do it anyway.

If Xifeng doesn't come, usually no one will come under such circumstances. She has the key to Xifeng's office and the identity that she can make up excuses for going in and out at will. will find out.

Xi Feng didn't show up at the company all morning, Lu Haichen felt that it was necessary to respond to Peng Shuyi.

Peng Shuyi was in a meeting, received a message from Lu Haichen, and replied with three simple words [Got it].

The other party asked if it was Su Feng's boyfriend who came back.After returning from the police station the day before, he kept peeping at Xuanfeng's bedroom until midnight, and he also checked in the morning, but found nothing.

He felt that if Xiufeng's boyfriend came back, he would not be in a hurry to leave after leaving for so long, and he felt that the reason why Xuanfeng didn't come to work was most likely because he was still saddened by the trip to the police station, so he ignored Lu Haichen .

Lu Haichen waited and waited but didn't get a reply, and ignored him.He is a person who can only show enthusiasm when facing Xuanfeng, and is quite indifferent to other people and other things.

It is often Lu Haichen who sends a series of messages, and he only replies with a few words. Lu Haichen is very dissatisfied with him, but he is used to it.But this person can actually cook good dishes, which is very rare among men.

Lu Haichen put down his mobile phone, and Xiao Li Feidao emerged from the partition between the desks, showing off his fruitful achievements to him.

Xiao Li Feidao is a bitch, she shows everything on her face and confides in her words, but her business level is extremely high and her work ability is extremely strong. Xiao Min stipulates that old employees must find at least three potential customers every week , A valid customer, he has overfulfilled before the deadline.

This is now. In the past, his performance was quite outstanding in the entire department, but because the manager at that time, Lao Sun, did not implement an effective performance appraisal system, his ability did not show up.

Up to now, the performance appraisal has been strictly implemented, and his ability has been highlighted. Last week, he was praised by Xiao Min at the department's weekly meeting because he was the only employee who overfulfilled the task.

Speaking of which, he is the one who supports Xiao Min's actions the most, and Xiao Min's affirmation has given him greater motivation and passion, making him determined to win the monthly or even annual sales championship. .

Compared with him, Lu Haichen is simply a business idiot.In the first week, Xiao Li Feidao gained a lot. He put zero eggs, Xiao Li Feidao was praised, but he was warned. This week, he still got nothing.

Although he doesn't care about this, if he wants to stay, he must work hard to move forward.Who would have thought that he could handle his own clients like Lao Sun and Peng Shuyi, but he couldn't handle the business of this company. Obviously, he called Li Feidao as required and said the same thing, why the result was completely different? ?

Lu Haichen couldn't figure it out, but since hard work was useless, he could only go the wrong way.

Xiao Li Feidao was automatically delivered to the door, and he just happened to be able to chat with him, and spend money to buy a list of potential customers from him, not too many, as long as he can complete the task of newcomers.

The night before, Xiao Li Feidao saw the black card he swiped at the checkout. Knowing his financial strength, it should not be difficult to convince him.

During this period, Wang Yang was also working hard, but he solved it on the phone.After making the phone call, he returned to Xuanfeng's side, without any expression on his face, when Xuanfeng asked, he answered without any trace, with a very relaxed look.

When he came back, the TV series was in the midst of a rift between the hero and heroine because of a misunderstanding. The heroine kept asking why the hero loves her, but the hero refused to answer her because of the quarrel. The relationship between the two became very stiff.

I don't know if Xuanfeng has watched it, but he has watched it, and felt that the misunderstanding between the hero and heroine was not to find out the truth, but to fight. He was too stubborn and stupid. The previous vows of eternal love seemed like a joke at this time.

How difficult it is to love someone, how difficult it is to make someone fall in love with yourself.

He is not interested in exploring other people's feelings, and he will never let such a thing happen to him.

Although Xuan Feng's eyes hadn't left the TV very often, his heart was disturbed and he didn't pay attention to the TV series at all.When Wang Yang came back, he was full of heart and eyes.

Wang Rang sat down beside him, still holding the phone in his hand, and kissed him on the face first, and when he put down the phone, his hands were empty, he held up his face and kissed him deeply, as if It won't work if you don't stick with him.

[Kiss, just a kiss, above the neck, what's the point if you can't even kiss in a romance novel?Please let it go. ]

After receiving this kiss, his eyes were moistened with lust, and his body was weak and limp in Wang Rang's arms. This kind of time was really very comfortable and comfortable for him.

Wang Yang has known him for so many years, he has always known that he is excellent and gentle, but he has always regarded him as an older brother, and has never thought about it. When he was with him at the beginning, he always felt awkward. Take it for granted.

In short, when he was with Wang Rang, he didn't think about anything. How happy he would be if he could just ignorantly soak in the honey pot he fed until he grew old and died.

Xuan Feng arched Wang Rang, and Wang Rang hugged him even tighter.For Wang Yang, such a time is also comfortable and comfortable.

He expected to grow old and die like this, and so did Wang Yang.But because the reality cannot get rid of the turmoil of the outside world, the ideal is always different from the reality, and it is very difficult for two independent individuals to fully understand each other.

The reason why Wang Yang is obsessed with finding out his mind is because he loves him so much and respects him.In order for the two of them to truly grow old and die hand in hand, he had to think too much, but this first and most important step was difficult for him.

In the TV series, the hero finally stopped being awkward and told the heroine why he loves her.Love in this world is about the same. Love is nothing more than a person's external and internal excellent qualities, such as beauty, kindness, handsomeness and positivity.

But people are complex and multifaceted, and everything is constantly changing. How can such love be invincible?How can love be maintained once you discover the other person's inadequacy or loss of these qualities?

Soap operas really pop like soap bubbles, and they cannot withstand scrutiny.Wang Yang couldn't stand it, but he wanted to take this as an opportunity to find out what Xuan Feng wanted.

Xuan Feng stared at the TV, but focused on Wang Yang's hand.Wang Rang's hand was bigger than his, and he could completely wrap his hand with a fist.

The skin of his hands is smooth and smooth, but the phalanges are thick and there are calluses on the palms. They are very powerful hands that have been trained.Xi Feng couldn't help thinking that one night, he saved himself with these hands.

Xi Feng was wandering, Wang Yang thought he was also watching TV, so he expressed his impressions of the plot in the TV series. "The current domestic drama plots still use the previous thinking mode, which cannot meet the needs of the audience under the condition of highly developed social civilization."

Xuan Feng didn't know why.

Wang Yang explained: "Taking this drama as an example, the protagonist in it was trapped in a narrow life circle for a short period of time, but now people can communicate, explore, and seek knowledge across dimensions, regions, and classes. Broader horizons and deeper thinking, this way of putting new wine in old bottles expresses a narrow view of love."

Xuan Feng was still bewildered.

Wang Yang then asked, "Do you know why I love you?"

Xi Feng had never heard him say it, so naturally he didn't know, he asked himself and answered: "I love you because you are my childhood, youth, youth, my emotions, my past, present and ideals. future. You are you and I; I am me, but not just me."

The wise man said that what everyone loves most is himself.Emotional experts say that if a person does not know how to love himself, he will not know how to love others.This has led some to misinterpret the meaning of these words, thinking that selfishness is justifiable, especially when it comes to relationships.

When someone loves the other person more than they love themselves, it often results in a painful price.Even if he enjoys it himself, others will try to make him wake up.

Love is not a necessity, loving yourself more is a must.Isn't there a compromise, a rational way?

You are you and me; I am me, but not just me.You have me I have you.Two people are both independent individuals and symbiosis, regardless of each other, there are also you and me.

Wang Rang's love for Xuanfeng has nothing to do with the beauty or ugliness of Xuanfeng's appearance, the quality of his personality, or the depth of his thoughts. Everyone has their own characteristics, and these will change over time.

His feelings for Xuanfeng are precipitated in the changes, and they are consistent, including the past and the present.That was his ideal love, and he wanted to build their future in that way.

Wang Yang's feelings are too thick, his words and eyes are too affectionate, which is in stark contrast to the previous impassioned criticism of my country's film and television industry.

Xuan Feng felt that Wang Yang at this moment was like a child who was eagerly waiting for his parents to praise him for his good grades in the exam, but he didn't know how to praise him.He himself doesn't have a clear understanding of love, how can he distinguish the good or bad of other people's views on love?How to praise?lie?

Xuanfeng's level of confusion at this moment is comparable to that when Fang Yang saw the yellow rose in Lu Haichen's hand turn into a green rose, so the difference in thinking is not only manifested between men and women, but also between individuals.

Therefore, the relationship between the opposite sex and the same sex leads to the same goal, and individual differences cannot be avoided. When it is time to quarrel, they will still quarrel, and when it is time to break up, they will still break up.

Xi Feng's eyes dimmed, just like the last time when Wang Yang asked him if he loved him, a bad feeling arose spontaneously, but he didn't believe it and was not willing to accept that Xuan Feng didn't love him.

Wang Rang held Xuan Feng's face and kissed him affectionately, and he responded with the same affection.He has reasons to believe that Xuanfeng loves him, as long as he says "I love you", the preparations he has made for them to be together for a long time can be started at the right time, just wait for him to say a word.

So after they kissed, Wang Yang asked him: "Do you love me? What do you love me for?"

Do you love me?A few words fell into the black hole at the bottom of Xuanfeng's heart again, causing the sound of water ticking, but still no answer was given.

He thought, if he didn't give an answer, Wang Yang might be disappointed, so can they still be together?Maybe they shouldn't be together in the first place, but this time they will be separated more thoroughly.

It was fine before, so why ask this all of a sudden?If you don't ask, they will spend the whole afternoon comfortably, why can't they maintain this afternoon?Why make things difficult for him?What should he do?

Xuanfeng was anxious and sad, like a beast struggling, no matter how hard he struggled, it was useless, which made him cry again unconsciously.He is like a tragic drama actor, ready to cry at any time for his role.

Wang Yang still didn't understand why he just refused to answer himself, even if the answer was no love, he could make a countermeasure if he found out the root cause.

But he didn't answer, what should Wang Yang do?

"Some people say that people often talk about love because they are not confident in their own feelings." Wang Yang raised Xuanfeng's chin, made him look at him, and said seriously: "Xiaofeng, I don't think it's wrong to say that. wrong."

"Even though I know myself very well, I am very clear about my abilities, I know how many things I can accomplish and how difficult things are, and I am very confident in myself. But I am completely unsure about my feelings and your feelings. When it is to comfort me or appease me, tell me you love me, okay?"

Wang Rang's words were for the second best, and only for temporary stability, but Xuan Feng didn't understand, but it wasn't incomplete. He could feel his entanglement and anxiety at the moment, and he was talking to Peng behind the poplar tree. It was the same mood when Shu Yi confessed.

But he can't lie to Wang Rang, Wang Rang is too important to him, and because he is important, he can't bear to lie to him.

Xuan Feng cried into tears, but Wang Yang's mood suddenly fell from the high cliff to the bottom of the valley, and the atmosphere suddenly became extremely cold.

Wang Yang didn't want to say or do anything, he was extremely tired and cold.If that's what it feels like when people run out of fuel, then he's dead.

He lay down on the sofa, throwing out the turmoil of the outside world, without thinking, and let this body decay and rot in this dirty world.

Xuanfeng struggled with his own soul, but in the end he couldn't tell the winner.He didn't know what to do, and he didn't want to leave Wang Yang.Wang Yang lay on the sofa with his eyes closed. He didn't know whether he was asleep or awake. He held back his tears, lay down slowly, and lay beside him.

Man is mortal, and if he could, he would like his life to end in this way.