Enemies always have a narrow road

After the hysterical crying outside the operating room, until the end of the funeral, Su Fei never shed a single tear.

He almost lost the ability to express emotions, contacting cremation, arranging the cemetery, and receiving relatives and friends expressionlessly.

On that day many years ago, he pushed Chen Chuhong's wheelchair and stood in the cremation room, holding back all the tears, not daring to show a little cowardice in front of the sad woman who was about to faint.

Someone had to be in charge, and he was the only man left in the family.

But now, the person in the world who hated him the most but also loved him the most has also left, and from now on he is the only one left alive, but he finds that he has not even had a single tear.

Even in the extremely quiet cremation room, the staff of the crematorium even approached Su Fei after comparing the mourning voices of the dutiful son and grandson next door, and said, "If necessary, I can introduce a professional mourning team."

And Su Fei just stood there motionless, staring at a pair of blood-red eyes, fixedly staring at the pull ring on the cremation furnace, like a dead tree.

Chen Nan watched helplessly as Su Fei became more serious than before, not eating, drinking, listening or talking, and isolating the whole world.He refuses to help or even communicate. If you disturb his steps, he will not be able to say a word, but just stand in front of everyone, staring at you with a pair of unwavering eyes until you give in to the [Rebirth] teacher How do you conquer Tsundere.

Chen Nan had no choice but to let go of everything in the company and stay by Su Fei's side every step of the way, watching him walking dead but helpless.

On the day of the funeral, there was the heaviest rainstorm since the beginning of winter. The whole world was washed into black and white, and life became a pantomime. Soybean-sized raindrops hit the tombstones, the ground, and people’s faces, causing pain .

After Su Fei stood in front of the tombstone for four hours, he finally fell into the pouring rain.Chen Nan hugged him and ran to the car parked outside the cemetery, only felt that the person in his arms seemed to fly away so lightly that he could hardly hold him.

"How long has it been without a normal work and rest? Such a young man is severely malnourished and has fainted! You family members are too negligent!" The doctor blamed, pointing to the various data on the checklist.

Chen Nan pushed Su Fei's forehead hair aside, held his hand and asked, "Why hasn't he woke up after so long?"

"It's been a long time since I slept! It's normal to sleep for a day and a night! Now that I know I'm worried, why didn't the patient eat and sleep well at first?" The doctor replied angrily.

Chen Nan pursed his thin lips tightly, quietly watching the sleeping person on the hospital bed, no longer speaking.

The assistant waiting at the side watched the words and gestures, and pulled the doctor out while nodding and saying yes.Not long after, he came in with another set of clothes, and said in a low voice, "Mr. Chen, go and change quickly, your whole body is soaked."

Chen Nan didn't move, and the assistant persuaded again: "Mr. Chen, in this situation, if you also fall ill, Mr. Su..."

Before he finished speaking, Chen Nan had already stood up and took the clothes in his hand, and while walking to the bathroom, he ordered: "Su Fei needs to rest, and refuse anyone who wants to visit these days."

Su Fei slept a whole day and night longer than the doctor said, and only woke up slowly on the third night.

With a movement of his hand, Chen Nan, who was lying on the bed and sleeping lightly, woke up, and immediately stood up and asked anxiously: "How is it? How do you feel? What do you want to eat? I'll arrange for someone to bring it over right away!"

Su Fei's stupefied eyeballs slowly turned to Chen Nan's side, but they seemed to have no focal length at all, his gaze seemed to pass through Chen Nan but he didn't know where it landed.It's like a physical reaction to just hearing the sound, without realizing who is speaking and what is being said.

Chen Nan yelled a few more words, and found that Su Fei was still unresponsive, his heart burst into flames, and he immediately rang the bell to call the doctor.

But in the middle of the night, I was busy with inspections and laboratory tests for a while, and the conclusion was that except for slight malnutrition, I was unscathed and in good health.

"Nutrition solution is not as good as food after all. As long as you take a good rest and eat well after you leave the hospital, young people will replenish it soon!" The doctor put away the stethoscope and said unhurriedly.

"But why did you tell him not to respond?" Chen Nan frowned tightly.

The doctor has listened to and read a lot of news these days. He shook his head: "I can only guarantee his physical function is healthy. In terms of psychology, let's arrange for the relevant doctor to come and see him tomorrow morning." After finishing speaking, Seeing that Chen Nan's expression was not gloomy, he comforted him: "Don't worry, he must be the most authoritative psychiatrist."

However, Su Fei's situation is not optimistic.

"Refused to communicate, blocked senses, unable to do anything." The doctor walked out of the ward, and shook his head at Chen Nan who was waiting outside the door: "He is like a baby bird hiding in its shell, if he doesn't peck out the shell first There is a gap, and nothing we do outside will help. Medication alone is not effective. Do you have the patient's previous medical records? I'll see if I can find a breakthrough. Although I don't know why you want to change the psychiatrist , but in fact it is better to continue to let his previous doctor take over, after all, he knows the patient's situation better."

"No, he hasn't seen a psychiatrist before. Apart from being in a bad state of mind due to too many unpleasant things happening during this period, he has always been normal." Chen Nan looked directly at the doctor.

The doctor frowned: "Impossible. He has self-harmed more than once. Judging from the healing of the scar on his thigh, it was at least a few years ago. Without treatment, he would not be able to live a normal life as you said."

Chen Nan was terrified, his mind was clear, but he couldn't believe it, so he could only explain to Su Fei in vain: "He said that the scar was caused by an accidental injury while participating in outdoor activities in high school, it wasn't..."

"No." The doctor shook his head: "Generally, outdoor sports injuries will be injured on the outside or on the chest and back, and the scars will be staggered and hideous, so it is impossible to be so neat. I have seen many patients with self-inflicted scars. The scars on his body are left on the human body. In a relatively hidden location, the wounds are neat and flat, and the distances are almost the same, which proves that it is very likely that the patient consciously self-harmed and wanted to hide it from others. And during the time I was trying to communicate with him, Although he has not spoken, I found his attention shifting a bit strange. I suspect that he may also have symptoms of visual hallucinations and auditory hallucinations, or even multiple personalities. It is already very serious to this extent, and some patients may even commit suicide. Tendency, that's why I think he must have been treated..."

Chen Nan's figure shook slightly, he remembered some details that were too small to be ignored in a flash, and he was speechless for a while.There was a bang in his head, and there were only a few words left to bump back and forth.

Visual hallucinations, self-harm, suicide...

Chen Chuhong replayed the scene of that night countless times in her mind, and that face became Su Fei's!

Chen Nan broke out in a cold sweat almost immediately, which made him shiver from the cold.

With a slight trembling of his voice, he said those plots that he didn't care about at first, word by word, for fear of missing something.

Nightmares during intimacy, chicken soup for the soul like self-suggestion in the mirror when waking up early, a little boy who mistakenly thought he almost ran into him but disappeared while riding a bicycle, a variety of psychology-related books in the bookcase at home, Dr. Tang once saw unconscious finger twitching ...

"According to what you said, the patient may have had psychological problems because he lived with his biological mother for a period of time, and then suffered family upheavals and was denied by himself and his adoptive mother at the same time, which caused psychological problems, but he ignored the sense of responsibility and guilt. Those problems were solved, and even made him abnormal to form the illusion of 'self-healing'. This shows that the patient's mind is different from ordinary people's firmness..." The doctor stopped suddenly and sighed heavily.

Chen Nan had a bad intuition, so he bit the bullet and asked, "Isn't this a good sign?"

The doctor nodded, and continued: "First of all, he did not receive professional treatment, but took some extreme behaviors to suppress himself, which is equivalent to leaving a chronic disease, which will affect the effect of normal treatment. Furthermore, he has a firm mind. Cooperating and accepting treatment will definitely get twice the result with half the effort, but on the contrary, if he resists, then this will become the biggest obstacle, the more firm he is, the more difficult it will be for the treatment to progress."

Su Fei completely belongs to the latter, if he doesn't get in, it's useless for anyone to come, and his eyes won't fall on anyone, including Chen Nan.

He couldn't eat and couldn't sleep, and relied entirely on nutritional infusions and tranquilizers to maintain his basic nutrition and sleep, and his whole body lost weight rapidly at a speed visible to the naked eye.

Every time Tang Wanru and her husband came over, they couldn't help feeling sore when they saw Su Fei's situation, and when they saw their slovenly and increasingly haggard son, they felt distressed and often shed tears.

Chen Nan was physically and mentally exhausted because of Su Fei's situation, and it was even more tiring to take care of the visits of his parents, relatives and friends. In addition, the doctor said that many people were not conducive to treatment, so he simply declined everyone's visits.

After a month of conservative treatment, Su Fei's condition did not improve at all, and even caused side effects of involuntary control of his limbs due to the use of drugs.

Most of the time, I stay quietly on the bed, or lie or sit, like a living corpse.Sometimes emotional instability leads to hallucinations, self-harm with all possible behaviors, and sometimes shrinks under the bed or under the table, or even in the closet, trembling like a little beast that has only encountered a natural enemy.

Chen Nan even began to consider his mother's suggestion, planning to send him abroad for treatment.

That day, Su Fei had a seizure. He had just fallen asleep after being injected with drugs, when his assistant knocked on the door and came in.

"Mr. Chen, Dr. Tang from Anxin Hospital is here again..." the assistant's voice was very soft.

"I don't see, didn't Tongyi ask you to reply to the doctor not to advise relatives and friends to visit?" Chen Nan gently stroked Su Fei's thin and clearly visible blood vessels, and slowed down the injection speed of the infusion tube.

"Yes, I already answered when he came last time." The assistant paused, raised his eyes to observe Chen Nan's face, and continued: "But Doctor Tang said that he came to see you today, and it is very important about Mr. Su." It may be helpful for treatment.”

Chen Nan raised his eyebrows, and finally turned his face away and gave the assistant a straight look.

It doesn't matter whether he is superstitious or angry, because of Chen Chuhong's relationship, he still doesn't want to have any contact with Anxin Hospital, and he always feels inexplicably unlucky.

Tang Qiang came to visit Su Fei once before, and he also refused, but this time, regardless of whether it is true or not, as long as there is a little hope, Chen Nan is not willing to let it go.

Tang Qiang also guessed what Chen Nan was thinking. He knew Su Fei's current attending doctor and had already understood the situation in private. When he saw Chen Nan coming out to see him, he took out a mobile phone and cut straight to the point: "This mobile phone is a small one. Mother Fei had been holding it in her hand before she died, and she didn't let go when she was pushed into the operating room for emergency treatment, even her heartbeat was gone."

It turned out that the assistant doctor found the phone at the time, took a lot of effort to break it off from Chen Chuhong's hand, and put it in his pocket. Later, when he came out, Su Fei lost control and wanted to beat the doctor, and later because of a series of car accidents nearby. The patient was sent to the emergency department nearby. The assistant doctor had been busy all night, and the next morning he was in a hurry to change shifts and go home to rest, so he put the phone in the lost and found and asked the nurse on duty to send it back to the ward.

I thought that the family members of the deceased could take them away together when they came to count the relics, but the little nurse responded casually and didn't take it to heart at all.At that time, Su Fei was so sad that he simply packed the clothes and supplies in Chen Chuhong's ward, and forgot about the cell phone that he hadn't used a few times.

Coincidentally, yesterday the assistant doctor went to the lost and found office to get a bunch of keys that he had lost, and saw the phone that had already died, so he found Tang Qiang.

Tang Qiang felt a little strange after hearing his description.Chen Chuhong didn't like this kind of electronic products when she was alive, and she used the old radio in the ward the most. If it is true that she clings to the phone until she dies, does it mean that there is a lot of her in it? What do you value?

"I wonder if she left something for Xiaofei in the phone? A text message? Or a recording?" Tang Qiang handed the phone to Chen Nan: "I have borrowed a charger with the same interface to charge it, but A password is set so I haven't had a chance to check it, I thought you might know the password."

Chen Nan did know the password. When Su Fei first bought a mobile phone, he heard from the shopping guide that if the touch-screen mobile phone was not locked and kept in his pocket, it would be easy to dial by mistake, so he set a very simple gesture password - l.

Sure enough, they saw a recording on the mobile phone, and the time was [-]:[-] that night, the Immortal Queen.

Chen Nan clicked on the recording to play, and the first dozen or so seconds were filled with the sound of cloth being rolled and rolled, and it was only after a while that Chen Chuhong's voice came out from the speaker.

She spoke slowly and her voice was unusually quiet.

"Xiao Fei, it seems that I haven't called you that for a long time, since... your father and Xiao Xiang left. I still remember when your father brought you home, you shrank carefully behind him, not daring to speak and steal Seeing me, the whole face is so thin that it is almost out of shape, but the eyes are black and bright, and it looks like a smart child. From childhood to adulthood, no matter what you do, you never let me and your dad worry about it. Like your younger brother, who always loves to be mischievous and never has time to spare." Speaking of this, Chen Chuhong seemed to recall something, and even chuckled lightly.

"Xiao Fei, you have always been a good boy, but God has made you suffer too much. After you were born, you were taken by your own mother. I don't know how many hardships you have suffered. Later, later, you met me...Xiao Fei , Mom, I’m sorry, Mom... I know I can’t blame you for all this, but who else can I blame but you! If I had gone with your father and the others, I would have dragged this half-dead Living in vain, and dragging you down. Xiaofei, I have always been a cowardly woman. I blamed your mother back then, and then blamed you after something happened. After so many years, living like a walking dead is really a shame. Too tired. Xiaofei, please forgive mom, mom really misses your dad and Xiaoxiang so much, mom selfishly wants to reunite with them early, so..."

"I'm leaving, Xiaofei, you have to be good, just like before. Mom knows, you will never worry me. Goodbye Xiaofei. Forgive mom, Xiaofei, mom will always love you, just love Xiaofei Like flying."

This recording was like a spell that lifted Su Fei's aphasia.

His slack focus began to gather, and his erratic attention also became concentrated.When Chen Chuhong's last syllable fell into his ears, Su Fei opened his mouth and finally uttered the first syllable in a long time. He shouted "Mom" in a hoarse voice and suppressed it, and then wept uncontrollably. .

It wasn't until this moment that he felt his dead heart start beating again, and blood flowed through every part of his body again.

Chen Nan stretched out his arms to hug him, and couldn't help but redden his eyes: "Don't worry, I'm always here, and I will always be with you!"

Su Fei finally pecked a small hole in his hard protective shell, and the treatment began without delay.

Since his condition was more complicated than that of Chen Chuhong, and the treatment was more difficult, fortunately, he wanted to recover more than anyone else.

Su Fei is like being locked in a heavily sealed human-shaped prison, he can see everything around him, he can see Chen Nan's constant companionship and protection, he can also see his emaciation and pain, but he can't take the initiative of his body Right, can't even control his tongue.

He is soberly aware that all the illusions are false, but he is trapped in the deepest part of his body by heavy shackles.

He knew that Chen Nan would accompany him outside the door every night, "dong dong dong", every time he came, he would gently knock on the door three times. These three sounds were Su Fei's greatest expectation and energy every day.

It would be nice to be able to control one hand, Su Fei thought, so that he could at least knock back and tell Chen Nan that he was also working hard, and that one day he would be able to stand by his side again.

He struggles and resists every day, and every time he breaks free from a lock, his strength becomes stronger. On the day when all the locks are broken, he wants to give Chen Nan a strong hug...

Do you believe?All partings in life will have a day of reunion.

If you and I persist, that day will come soon.