[Ghost Lamp] The dark humor of hell

"Thinking about it this way, if you say number 13, it must be that one."

Shi Lantern took the ghost lamp to the pedestrian street, and registered the dead who had become earth-bound spirits because of their obsession with the unreleased game. Seeing that the ghost lamp handed them over to the trio of the reception department but did not intend to leave, he Without going into the details, he followed behind the ghost lamp and looked left and right.

Even at night, the street lamps that symbolize desire still illuminate the street. The stone lanterns in the shape of junior high school students often attract the attention of others. After Miss Lilith was caught by her housekeeper and brought back to Western Hell, the ghost lamp embraced her Chest walked into the alley, not knowing where his destination was.

"Peony No. 13 is a fake name. I didn't expect her to be a part-time killer. I underestimated her." Ghost Lantern didn't look back.

"No, Lord Ghost Lantern, this is plagiarism at all, it is definitely a name just given, or she is actually called Peony Thirteen."

"Does anyone have thirteen daughters in a row?" Gui Deng couldn't help but glance back at Shi Lantern. Regardless of the majestic but vulgar surname Mudan, her parents who gave birth to thirteen daughters are really pitiful.

Stone Lantern affirmed very seriously: "Maybe, I have seen a family that gave birth to thirteen sons. No matter how low the probability is, as long as it is not zero, it is possible."

"Then let her be called Shisanzi."

"Actually, I think the name Peony Jasmine Sayuri is pretty good."

"This is no longer a person's name, but the name of a garden."

The stone lantern that was complained by the ghost lantern walked leisurely on the fence, looking down at the inside of the alley, feeling a sense of shame for some reason.

The alley is narrow and long, and the ghost lamp occasionally bypasses the trash can blocking the way. After walking for a long time, it finally saw the exit. The stone lantern that jumped off the side wall saw his younger brother standing at Sanchakou eating snacks not far away.

He was eating snacks "clicking", and his whole body was a bit transparent. With the little white bathrobe and pale face, he was obviously preparing to be scary.

"Well, Lord Ghost Lantern, may I ask who this is?"

Stone Lantern looked at Ghost Lantern, who had stopped to watch silently. He should have already confiscated all the snack fees from his younger brother for the second half of the year. How could he afford food?

"The ongoing murder plan to bring Miss Peony Jasmine Sayuri to hell."

"Master Ghost Lantern, please forgive me, don't use that title anymore, it's too shameful."

Denying all the names he had chosen, Shi Lantern watched his younger brother from a distance after eating the snacks and moved to the garbage collection place next to him in small steps, threw the snack bag into the trash can, and stood there without moving, touching the He rubbed his chin as if thinking about something.

"..."

Then the stone lantern saw him walk into the garbage dump and sit on top of it.

"Hey, hey, it's a big piece of garbage, but a little ghost was thrown into the garbage dump. I feel like the police will come to my house tomorrow, Mr. Ghost Lantern. After all, didn't you draw up the murder plan 800 years ago? ?”

Biting his finger, his younger brother's familiar behavior made him uneasy, not only the police, but maybe someone from the Copyright Association would come to his door tomorrow.It's not that changing Princess Anne into Prince Anne or Juliet into Tybalt will change the plot, it's just that the audience has changed from Otome to Rotten.

"There is no plan for that. I think it is very difficult to achieve a method of killing that can make people smile and face death. So I let brother Shi Denglong handle it by himself, and I will pay him to do it."

"Wow, Master Ghost Lantern, don't train someone else's younger brother to become younger brother No. 13."

I was very worried that my younger brother would end up on the killer's path of no return. Shi Lantern worriedly wanted to catch him back. Just give you snacks or something. Selling yourself to this ghost is the most terrible thing. Brother, you don't have ten The second brother, your mother's name is Nami Asahi, so don't be a younger brother, No. 13.

"It doesn't have to be brother No. 13, maybe Shi Lantern you will have 24 younger brothers and form a big family."

Ghost Lantern reached out and grabbed the collar of the stone lantern, pulling him back a little bit, the intention to stop it was self-evident.Shi Lantern tried to walk a few steps, but finally gave up, pouted and stood beside Ghost Lantern no longer.

"That's not as good as brother number 13. The former is a killer with a brain and the latter has no brains at all. No, no matter whether it is 24 or [-] brothers, one is enough. In reality, there are sisters. People will definitely not be sister-cons, and the same goes for younger brothers."

Ghost Lantern accidentally shifted his gaze from Shi Denglong's younger brother to the side. He is already a very excessive younger brother.

"...Ah, here we come."

Facing this road, it felt a bit strange that no one was walking. The stone lantern squinted and looked at the distance of the street lights. The street lights of this deer were relatively wide, and they could not be seen until the other party appeared not far from the street lights.Thinking of the figure appearing from the darkness in this way, although it is relatively short, it is still terrifying.

In addition, her expression was as calm as her brother's, and she didn't feel the slightest fear in this unmanned street. Is it because she is brave or nervous? Stone Lantern thinks it is necessary to study it.

"Ah, here we come." Ghost Lantern said at the same time.

There was no work tonight, the girl who called herself Peony No. 13 looked at her watch, and walked home with the small cake that the store manager had kindly gifted her.

The common noun "on the way home" can think of a lot, whether it is about a horror movie or a crime fact or a very common love story, the result of thousands of thoughts gathered in the mind is - going home The road is so boring, life is so boring, let her meet a gangster girl and go on the road to save the world.

It's not that if you fell asleep yesterday and saw a hand under the bed, the next morning you can see the God of Heaven sitting next to you.Because you may find that that hand is just the hand of a doll gifted by a store manager with strange interests during the Doll's Festival.

Although it is not clear why the Hina dolls in the store manager's impression are dressed in western clothes, but she is sure that she prefers people in kimonos.This is like the question of "like sweet or salty", it is a preference that a person has innately.

Ah, by the way, she likes salty food.But the store manager gave her a small cake that was too sweet and greasy every time, and she would often seriously consider whether to throw it in the trash.

The result of serious thinking is that I often linger in front of the garbage dump for a long time, and I don’t leave until I find that the garbage dump here does not allow domestic garbage to be thrown away.

But today is a bit special.

Because there is a little boy in a yukata sitting on the TV, who looks like a doll. As for why he looks like a doll, the other party's eyes always follow her when she approaches.

——This plot seems a bit familiar.

After staring at the little boy for a while, when she was about to leave expressionlessly, the latter opened his mouth slowly.

"...Big sister...do you have a younger brother?"

"..."

Her heart became clearer, because she couldn't see the little boy's appearance carefully because of the light, but at least she could be sure that the boy was wearing her favorite national costume. If it was a gothic lolita like the original script, she would definitely turn her head and leave.

But the gothic loli won't stop calling her.She is confident that at least she will not be recognized as her brother.

"No."

"... Big sister... Do you want a younger brother?"

"If you don't need to spend money, I'd be very willing to train a free labor force. Don't you eat? Well... boys shouldn't grow up to be married to each other, right?"

She stroked her chin and looked at the little boy, feeling that her criteria for choosing a younger brother were a bit familiar, so she asked specifically to be on the safe side.

The little boy didn't know which sentence she said was frightened, and he shrank back.Although his face was still expressionless, due to the darkness, he couldn't see clearly, combined with his movements, his aura had weakened a lot.

She sighed, bent down and put the small cake presented by the store manager in front of the other party: "Whether you are abandoned by your parents or a younger brother in kimono with serious self-abuse tendencies, or just to challenge the authority of the copyright association, please eat this." .”

The cakes in the part-time maid cafe have always been very popular with customers. She doesn't know what is delicious, but the children in front of her must love it.

From cream cakes to sour hawthorn slices every day, this is also a sign of aging.In the past, my father liked to buy a few large packs of hawthorn slices at home, and didn't eat them, but she ate them in the end.

Standing up, she turned a corner to the side, and walked away slowly without noticing the two standing at the exit of an alley in the distance.

"..."

Brother Shi Lantern climbed a few steps forward and opened the box containing the small cakes. The exquisite cakes inside formed a sharp contrast with the environment of the garbage dump, and seemed to be still shining.His eyes were shining together, excitedly peeling off the large garbage, he stretched out his hand and was ready to start——

"What are you doing!! Wash your hands first before eating!! Where did the murder plan go!! Why did you just buy a small cake? It's too cheap! Hey!! I will believe that you are about to become a younger brother I’m really drunk on the 13th too!! Since it’s the beginning, I’ll be responsible for finishing all the plots and killing everyone in her family!! Did you hear clearly when I said to wash my hands before eating cake!!”

Slapping back the younger brother's hand who had reached out to the cake several times, Stone Lantern kept the cake away while complaining, and did not waver when he met his younger brother's unwilling eyes. He looked up and wanted to say something to Ghost Lamp, but saw the latter directly He looked straight at the direction the girl was leaving and fell into deep thought.

"Master Ghost Lamp?"

"Ok?"

"Is there anything in that direction?"

Shi Lantern held down the head of his younger brother, and lifted the cake high with one hand to prevent him from reaching it. He was a little curious about the ghost lantern's movements, but when he looked in the same direction, he found nothing.

"A dead person floated past just now, so it shouldn't be a big problem. I thought of a way to make people leave this world with a smile. Come back to hell with me."

Fanwai Tanabata Festival Theater

The author has something to say: The Tanabata Festival in Japan is very different from the Tanabata Festival in China...

As you write, you write more.

Then I was complained about being good at literature and art [cover my face.

how could!

That's it, the author is very lonely today T^T, so I won't say that I played games all day.This is a little story from a long time ago——

"Does Bone Girl-san know what the Qixi Festival usually does?"

Gui Deng sat at the table and worked hard, but he didn't miss the bone girl who was holding a tall stack of white papers and was about to walk out of Yan Mo Temple.The latter sticks out his head and looks at the ghost lamp with doubtful eyes.

"I just found under the table the event application submitted by Axiang last year, which was related to the Qixi Festival."

Ghost Lamp put the pen aside, stood up and walked to the side of the bone girl, looked at the documents taller than her, and took some of them.

"I just remembered this while chatting with Ah Xiang. The interval between the Qixi Festival and the Yulan Festival is too short. Two consecutive events may reduce the enthusiasm of the jailers, so it was not adopted at the time. It was brought up again this year..."

"Qixi Festival, I remember it is a festival where two bamboos are planted to hang some wishes?"

Nodding to the ghost lamp to express her gratitude, the bone girl walked side by side with him on the road back to hell.The Qixi festival in the village once appeared in my mind, but I didn't participate much because it was too boring.

Now it seems that this can be regarded as a loophole in knowledge.

"Pray... Maybe you can try it."

"...Master Ghost Lantern doesn't know, is there already a small Tanabata Festival in the residential area?"

"……Oh?"

Ghost Lamp looked back at the bone girl who was short and had short steps, stopped and waited for her to catch up, expressing curiosity about the Qixi festival she was talking about.There are fewer ceremonies held by the people themselves, because there are more concerns, such as venue rental, various disputes, or damage to public property, etc., which need to be adjusted carefully. Without Yan Modian as an intermediary, it always ends in chaos.

"Ms. Axiang from Zhonghe Hell has communicated with the residents of the residential area at the request of the female jailer. Although the scale is not large, it is not as grand as the Yulan Festival, but there is still a small street. Miss Axiang really It's amazing..."

Unlike ordinary female prison guards, what the bone girl admired was Ah Xiang's ability to work. After keeping up with the ghost lamp, she also noticed that her steps were a little short, so she couldn't help but speed up her walking frequency.

"Well, Ah Xiang is not only supported by the male jailers but also loved by the female jailers. There is no problem in entrusting her with the job."

Ghost Lantern was carrying a document that was not too high, looked sideways at the bone girl who had a strange focus for a while, and asked, "Does bone girl-san want to go to the Qixi Festival?"

"Eh?"

There's definitely something wrong with this hell.The bone girl believed so deeply.

He obviously refused twice on the grounds that "wearing mourning clothes is not suitable for such activities as festivals", but he was still brought out by Lord Ghost Lantern who had no idea what he was planning.

The residential area is not far away, and you can get there by taking the Hell Tram.

Master Ghost Lantern is far away, because the bone girl doesn't want to get close due to this distance.

Maybe it wasn't Hell that was wrong, but something was wrong with her.Sitting awkwardly by the window, the bone girl lowered her head and played with her fingers.

Because there is only one layer of skin, the fingertips are as pale as the white paper that was just held in the hand, and the feeling of no blood circulation always warns her that she is just a skeleton.

There will be no impulse, no heartbeat.All she has is cold bones and cold skin, without even the temperature.

— but still very irritated.

Ghost Lantern didn't say anything along the way, but just walked in front of her, always leaving a shadow behind her.For Mr. Ghost Lantern, the most suitable position is the position in front of others, he is always one step ahead of others.

Small steps can never keep up with big ones.

The gap between a step of [-] centimeters and a step of [-] centimeters will always be the distance between them, and the distance will become larger if they walk more, and there is no need for the bone girl to deliberately maintain it.

The Qixi Festival is indeed not as lively as the Yulan Festival. Most jailers may not know that this festival is being held. It is estimated that the flow of people here will be comparable to that of the Yulan Festival in a few years, and because of the story of the Cowherd and the Weaver Girl, women will account for the majority .

Hell can't see the stars.

Even when the bone girl looked up, she could only see the dark hell rock, covering the top of the hell. If fireworks were set off, there might be some problems, and some artistic conception would disappear.

"Do you want to see the starry sky, bone girl-san?"

"...No, it's just a look. Qixi Festival was originally a Chinese Valentine's Day, but now it's just a day for praying..."

"Japan already has a Valentine's Day, and the Tanabata festival doesn't play a big role."

The ghost lamp stopped from time to time and waited for the people behind it. At the end of the road, it seemed that a small bamboo forest had been planted, and the people around in twos and threes were all heading in that direction. will get lost.

Seeing the bone girl following with a blank face, Ghost Lantern thought about the solution.

"Master Ghost Lamp?"

It was still early, and the two people who stopped in the middle of the road not only blocked the way of passers-by, but also had a faint tendency to cause a blockage, the bone girl pondered for a while and whispered a reminder.

"..."

Gui Deng didn't say anything, stepped forward and grabbed the bone girl's hand, then turned around and continued walking.

"Hey?"

The bone girl was taken aback, and subconsciously followed her for a few quick steps. I wonder if the ghost lamp noticed her small steps and slowed down a bit. The focus is on the hand being held...grabbed.

Anyway, it can't be regarded as an ordinary handshake. Judging from the shape, the bone girl felt that Ghost Lantern regarded her hand as the handle of a mace. After hesitating for a while, she stopped her voice: "Well, Mr. Ghost Lantern, I won't get lost... ..."

"There are a lot of weirdos in this kind of place."

You are a weirdo, okay?Still a weirdo who loves goldfish!

Passing by a small stall fishing hell goldfish, the bone girl complained from the bottom of her heart, but she didn't see the ghost lamp, who was addicted to goldfish like life, stop.

A surrounding street is occupied by small stalls, but Ghost Lantern seems to have no interest in the two sides, or does it want to end the scheduled process of the Qixi Festival first and then go shopping slowly?Seeing the bamboo forest getting closer and A Xiang standing at the gate of the bamboo forest handing out notes, especially the smile on her face that seemed to know everything, the bone girl wanted to kneel down and worship her.

"Master Ghost Lantern, you are here too,...well, bone girl Sang, please write your wish on it."

Ah Xiang smiled and handed over two pieces of paper.

The bone girl took it expressionlessly.

Although the expressions of the two parties are quite different, at least the communication is going on smoothly.A Xiang changed hands and handed another piece of paper to Ghost Lantern, only to find that the latter was looking at the paintings of Cowherd and Vega around him.

"How is the painting? Because there is no starry sky in hell, I asked Eggplant to draw a picture, and there are some children painting on the side... Lord Ghost Lantern is also thinking about getting married."

"Married?" Ghost Lantern turned around.

Ah Xiang rubbed her face with her fingers, looked at the bone girl who was sitting beside her with a pen in her hands, and nodded with a smile on her face.

"This is mainly based on interest, and I have no plans for the time being."

"..." Ah Xiang's smile cracked for an instant, "Don't you have a date yet?"

"It's not an important thing, I haven't thought about it much. Now the operation of Hell is on the right track, if you don't pay attention, there may be unexpected problems..."

Looking at the ghost lamp that classifies major life events as "unimportant", Ah Xiang sighed, not knowing what to say to this old friend, and handing the paper to the other party, she looked at the drawn Cowherd and Vega , feel it.

"The prison guards in hell will not fall into chaos when their boss gets married. Master Ghost Lantern should trust them more, and find someone to get married quickly. It is also a good thing for some female prison guards."

"Good thing?"

"Yes, at least I won't expect a miracle anymore...Okay, Mr. Ghost Lantern, hurry up and accompany the person you brought out. There are many people in the Qixi Festival, so there will be no problem. Write something about work, and wishes that are too formulaic will be rejected."

Ah Xiang pushed the ghost lamp towards the bone girl.

What to say to dismiss... For things like wishes, Ghost Lantern thinks that it only needs to go to Gaotianyuan with a mace, and it can usually be realized.

This is the root of world domination by force.

"Has the bone girl-san finished writing?"

Holding the note and approaching the other party, Ghost Lantern pondered in his heart.

"...Well, but it's not so much a wish as a problem."

The bone girl tied the paper with a thin rope, stepped on the stool, grabbed the bent bamboo and tied it with painstaking efforts.

A little short in height.

Distress is very calm.

And not the type to care about other people's hobbies.

Ghost Lamp took two steps forward to take the paper in her hand, raised her head and tied it to a high place, and asked casually, "Does Bone Girl Sang have any intention of getting married?"

"...If the other party doesn't mind becoming a widower, I don't care, this kind of thing is not very important..."

The concept is the same.

"Oh?"

"...Because, I am already dead. I don't know when I will die again."