[Ghost Lamp] The dark humor of hell

It would be a little strange to turn on the lights in broad daylight, she scratched her head and got up and opened the tightly closed curtains.I don't know if it was because the sun was too glaring, she gritted her teeth and waved her hands in disgust, then sat back at the table, glanced at the bowls brought by the two children, she thought plain water was better.

Promote metabolism, nourish the body and mind, it is said that drinking too much boiled water can enter the kingdom of heaven after death.Of course, it's all based on other people's nonsense.

After shaking the water in the glass, she propped her head on one hand and looked at the ghost lamp sitting across from her. She took out a piece of paper from somewhere, and read it seriously.

"Keichi Fujiwara, because of 'hiding his family' and 'addicted to gambling', he should have been sent to the scorching hell dragon to serve his sentence. This time he is here to take you..."

"Wrong person."

Ghost Lantern read the content on the paper in a formulaic tone, but was interrupted by her in the middle of the reading.

"That's my father, and it has nothing to do with me. So you really are debt collectors? Although you seem to be a gentleman, you didn't expect it to be black when you cut it."

"Anyone cut is red, including the corpse."

"...Suddenly there is a gloomy feeling, can I trouble you to stay away from me?"

She moved in the opposite direction to the ghost lamp, but ran away without raising her foot. In a sense, the ghost lamp, which is a debt collector, lowered her head and looked through the information she got from the records department, and went back to give Ye Jitou a vacation. Well, there have been such obvious mistakes in the work.

"Anyway, my father's debt has nothing to do with me. Maybe you can go to my mother? I don't know where she is. Besides, my surname is not Fujiwara now, and the number outside the door is clearly written. I am alone. Female high school students in life, you can’t know how hard life is, so please go back after drinking this glass of plain water, I need a sufficient sleep to ensure my physical strength for the next week.”

She waved her hand, and it was obvious what she wanted to drive away.Shi Denglong's younger brother approached her depressedly, and tugged at the corner of her clothes.

Looking down, I saw a little ghost staring at me with teary eyes. This scene was so strange.However, she couldn't pull Shi Denglong's younger brother's hand away after tugging, so she pretended to be fierce and stared back.

"Big sister, do you feel unlucky?"

Exactly the same question as before was thrown.She hadn't answered just now, and she certainly wouldn't answer now.How could a kid with no hair grow understand the concept of misfortune——

"Like buying snacks, you always only have packaging bags? Drinking drinks always produce earthworms? Eating can always bite into sand grains? Signs often fall off the places you walk? Whether it is a boyfriend or a girlfriend, will they run away with others in the end? "

Hey what did you father teach this kindergarten kid! !She glanced at the ghost lamp subtly, touched the little boy's head to correct his three views, but heard the latter ask another question:

"The height will never grow taller? It turns out that this is inherited from another life."

"Hey kid, do you want to taste the taste of boiling oil dripping into your eyes? Or rather, you want to experience the feeling of hitting your little finger hard with a hammer?"

No matter how short she was, she was much taller than the kid in the kindergarten, she asked with a ferocious smile.

"I'm not interested in that kind of set meal. But big sister, since you're so unlucky, you might as well just die. We'll help you dispose of the corpse for free." Brother Stone Lantern enjoys the act of killing people by touching their heads.Bow your head and put forward your purpose.

"It's because people don't want to die. Although the suicide rate is high now, compared with the number of suicides, the number of successful suicides is really low. Looking at those who want to commit suicide, I want to stab them a few times. Ah, if there is It is stipulated that after the death of the unfortunate gods, I have to stab them a few times first. But dealing with the corpses... I always feel that you will stuff me into the cement and sink into Tokyo Bay. So I am sorry, but I solemnly refuse."

The younger brother Shi Lantern subtly set his sights on the ghost lamp who was in a certain way stipulated in misfortune.

Received two subtle glances today, Ghost Lantern calmly turned over the paper in his hand, and exchanged the other if one failed, as long as he took her back to hell.Let's talk about the rest in hell.

"You also have debts, without interest. The rest of the debt in hell will take four years of work to pay off. This is your part."

He handed over the white paper in his hand to the other party.

"... Ah, sorry, what does hell mean? Which loan company? Or a new bank? How can I borrow money when I'm not an adult yet."

"It's hell in a broad sense, what you owed in your previous life."

"I'm sorry Mr. debt collector, I just treated you as a normal person. Wait for me to correct my attitude."

She took a deep breath, put the water glass on the table, and unconsciously corrected her sitting posture, and the lazy atmosphere suddenly dissipated.Facing the ghost lamp of debt collectors who called themselves "hell employees", she said solemnly: "Do you need me to call the hospital for you? There is a good one nearby."

"No, you just need to die once and you'll be fine."

The atmosphere in the room suddenly became quiet again, or occasionally the murmur of the stone lanterns in the corner could be heard.In short, she had no desire to answer this question, and she sat upright and stared at the man who looked like a gangster, and time passed slowly.

As if he couldn't get used to the atmosphere, Shi Lantern's younger brother made a little noise during the period, but it still didn't stop the two from looking at each other. When he was impatiently preparing to throw the water glass on the ground and kill someone with a piece of glass, the ghost lantern on the opposite side faintly Sighed.

Master Ghost Lamp actually sighed...

Sighed?

Shi Denglong's brother immediately moved away from the girl next to him, and moved towards his brother who was crouching in the corner.

"You mean, you don't want to die now, right?"

"Of course. As long as you want me to die, there is no room for compromise. Please leave. I think the police are already guarding the door."

Debt collectors are such creatures, don’t hesitate to call the police directly when you encounter them, because when you have no money, you may be beaten and maimed by the other party, loan usury or something, how happy it is to go to jail and eat with the other party one thing.She cut off the phone on the table under the table.

Ghost Lantern on the opposite side stroked his chin, pondered the possibility of escaping from the police in this world, and finally decided on something, picked up the weird-looking bowl of soup from the table: "So, among the women I know, although their personalities or hobbies There are more or less problems in the capital, but they will not disobey the order. Since you don't want to obey the order, I can only force you to go to hell."

"... Hey, are you going to kill someone?"

"Stone Lantern, turn around."

Ghost Lamp stood up helplessly.

"Master Ghost Lantern has always been very polite to women, whether it's Duoyipo or Ishi Nagahime from Mount Fuji."

The younger brother turned around obediently, ignoring the struggling sound coming from behind him, squatted down and propped his head on his hands, and communicated with the elder brother who was squatting in the corner and hadn't gotten over the name "Peony Jasmine Sayuri".

"Although Lord Ghost Lantern seemed to have forgotten about her at first, but seeing how much I cared about him after meeting, I decided not to take revenge on him. Speaking of which, brother, you have the same personality as big sister, revenge is too impulsive. "

After being glared at by the stone lantern, the younger brother shrank his neck in fear, and there was the sound of porcelain being smashed on the ground behind him, as well as the sound of coughing uncontrollably.In line with the principle of "violating the order of the ghost lamp, the end will be terrible", the younger brother continued to mutter to himself as if he had no brother.

"But big sister's withdrawn and annoying personality needs to be changed, otherwise she will always have to..."

"You saw her around here a long time ago?"

In the middle of mumbling, he was interrupted by a stone lantern, and the younger brother immediately replied after being slightly stunned: "I have visited all the maid cafes around here, and I have met every maid."

"...I was wrong, I should have stopped you from associating with those nerds. Is it because you broke the Shimatsu doll to attract the attention of Lord Ghost Lamp?"

"of course."

"You won't even think about dinner this year."

For such a boring reason, he lost two months' salary! !Why not let him "by the way" bring the ghost lamp into the coffee shop, insisting on breaking such an expensive thing! !Shi Lantern decided to correct his younger brother's worldview another day.

The younger brother curled his lips, licked his cheeks and remained silent. In fact, it was just carelessness to break the Shimatsu doll, because at that time, he saw the elder sister trying to get close to her, but the luck value of the other party was too low, and a puddle of water appeared on the ground in front of her. , Relying on her motor nerves, she crossed over, but the short-legged herself... slipped and fell.

He should swallow this reason, maybe his brother will arrest him and send him to the "crash course on manners in hell" on the grounds of "regulate your behavior".Nodding his head to himself, there seemed to be no sound behind him, resisting the desire to look back at the situation, the younger brother waited for the ghost lamp's order.

However, after a while, Ghost Lamp's steady voice came from behind: "Is there anyone you know who is working in the secular department?"

"No, we don't like Miss Tujini from the reception department..."

Brother Shi Denglong looked back, because of the long-standing grievances, although the grievances were not as deep as those who had been motionless over there, it was okay to make mistakes occasionally.

I don't know whether the ghost lamps were arranged deliberately or because of excessive struggle, so the room is much more chaotic than it was at the beginning.The younger brother carefully pulled his brother's clothes, looked at the porcelain bowl that fell on the ground but was not broken, there seemed to be a fusangshen on it...

Let's ignore it for now... Master Ghost Lantern actually killed people in this world! !

The fear of ghost lamps has risen to a new height, and the younger brother looked at the motionless person on the ground in confusion, ... he must not have fallen asleep.

"Master Ghost Lantern, you... gave her a drink..."

Brother Shi Denglong felt that it was great that he didn't eat and drink that strange-looking bowl of soup.

"The miso soup of the dead in the urn of the living hell is a product formed by processing my brain miso soup. If you want to drink it, you can take it from the urn. In order to make the toxicity stronger, I poured in it when cooking. Some brains are effective for humans. But next time the smell can be lighter."

"..."

Gui Deng felt no guilt about killing someone in this world. He rubbed his chin, took a sip of boiled water from the side, picked up the useless Mengpo soup, and prepared to leave.

"Wait, Master Ghost Lantern! There are policemen outside the door..."