Born to haggard my heart

The chest hurts so much, I love An Feifei, but I can't do it like Guan Ce, for a little love from others, to do this.

Even, where is he at KIm, he is not even a stand-in, is he a toy?Like KIm says I am?It's not even a toy, it's just a tool to vent *desire*.

Or am I really getting too much and being desensitized to love.

Unlike Guan Ce, who was loved by no one since he was a child, and if someone gave him a little warmth, he gave back everything he had without complaint or regret?

The car lights illuminated the night sky and stopped beside me, Kai jumped out of the car: "Honey, I'm so touched! It's so cold, so dark, and so late at night, you will wait for me here, you are so sleepy , I thought you were sleeping."

Kissed my face hard, "It's so cold, I've been waiting here for a long time, let's go, let's go home."

Absolutely an oolong incident, I don't know if he will come back at this point.

Hugging me: "Miss me, me too, not seeing you every day is like three autumns. Thinking that if you come back tomorrow, it will be dark when you get home, and you will be delayed for another day, and you won't be able to see you.

If this is not done, I will be back soon.How about we spend Christmas and New Year together, and go back after the Spring Festival? "

When I opened my eyes the next day, it was already afternoon. I looked at the emerald in my hand, thank you, otherwise, I wouldn’t even be able to sleep.Clean up and go downstairs.

At this point, there was no one in the restaurant, so when I went to the kitchen, the maid came over and asked, "Mr. Bai, what would you like to order?" I took a cup of hot milk and sat at the very large solid wood dining table.

A newspaper was randomly thrown on the table. It was domestic news. While drinking milk, I grabbed the newspaper and flipped through it casually. There was a photo of An Feifei standing side by side with a beautiful woman, and my heart skipped a beat.

Look at the frightening headline below: The head of New World Plaza travels with beauty.

: Today, An Feifei, the head of New World Plaza, appeared on a blind date show. Regarding this, the official said: The woman is also the sole heir of a certain group, and the two parties have a good impression of each other.

My milk spilled and I didn't feel it.An Feifei is getting engaged.My eyes are blurry, and I can't read clearly.

I thought that after such a long time, I could calm down a bit. Goodbye to the news of Du'an Feifan, why is my heart still hurting so much that my heart malfunctions and I can't beat.

Yes, he is the head of the group, he wants to marry a wife and have children, and he wants to live a normal life.

what am iI thought it was a stand-in, but it was actually a toy, what about now?Not even a toy anymore.

This kind of identity cannot appear in the media or be exposed, even a junior is not qualified.

The public's understanding of Xiaosan is also a woman, let alone I am a man!

Then why are you still being so nice to me?You're going to marry a woman eventually, you've been so nice to me since the beginning, why?

Even in my worst time, drink your blood for me?That taste is still on my lips, so why should I fall in love with you? !

My throat was sweet, my heart was choked, and a mouthful of blood spit out. The maid heard the sound and ran over, and saw that I was opening my mouth, the mouth was blood red, the white sweater was also stained red, and there were blood stains on the ground.

With a cry of alarm, he immediately called someone to deal with it.

My heart stops, my body freezes, can I blame him?It's my fault that I can't recognize my heart, and ran out willfully, not satisfied with being a stand-in, a toy, insisting that he only loves me!

Isn't this self-inflicted?

Shouldn't you be like Guan Ce, when the other party gives you a little warmth, you should be grateful and stay by his side wholeheartedly, coming and going when he calls?

It was too late now, he went on a blind date, but it also proved the fact that he really used himself as a substitute as a toy.

I somehow made it to the bed* in a daze, and then Kai came, shook my hand, slapped my face, and called my name.

The doctor arrived later, rolled his eyelids, and gave another shot.In the end, I was annoyed by their tossing, I let out a sigh of relief, and reluctantly made an OK gesture, and Kai smiled through his tears.

"You scared me to death. Can you tell me something? Don't keep holding it in your heart. Long-term suppression of negative emotions will lead to physical diseases, and the heart will be overburdened."

Seeing that I didn't respond: "You really don't want to tell me, and you want to open it up, can you stop torturing yourself? You torturing yourself is more uncomfortable than torturing me.

Tell me what you want, what you want to do, and I will try my best to do it for you. "

Looking at his worried and anxious eyes for me, I really can't tell him: I want An Feifan, I want An Feifan by my side!

I tightly hold the emerald in my left hand, and the ring given to me by An Feifei, the spell of pure heart, control!Don't think about An Feifei anymore!Otherwise, you will really die!

I want to go back to China, but what can I do if I go back?An Feifei has found someone he likes again, shall I destroy her?I can't do it!

It's good to just sneak a look at him.Stop thinking about him!Didn't you say it?Stop thinking about him!

Kai saw me shivering under the quilt: "Bai Bai, don't do this, if you have something to say, don't carry it yourself." He cried in distress.

I reached out and slowly touched his face, gently wiped away his tears, I can't give you anything, you better let go, don't care about my life or death.sorry.

Shaking my hand on his face: "Can you forget about him? With me? Let's try."

It's unfair to you, I don't want to try, and hurt another person.

Suddenly I remembered what Wu Tianyu said: The only thing that hurts me is the one who kills me.

Didn't I come out again to harm someone?It hurt Kai.Guilt deepened.

Don't cry for me, I'm not worth it.

I slept for another three days and three nights, and was woken up by the singing of Christmas and the cheers of the people.

Kai was beside him: "Are you finally awake? Are you feeling better?" He asked with concern.I nod.

Basically recovered, as long as he doesn't think about An Feifei anymore, he can probably still live.

"What do you want to eat? I'll ask the chef to prepare it, Yusheng?" I nodded.Seeing him call the kitchen and say Fanwen, I blame myself. Why do you order a museum curator like a servant? Is it because he likes someone for the first time in 30 years?

That kind of cautious, trembling, afraid of melting in my mouth, afraid of breaking in my hands, who have I ever felt?

In this way, I am self-willed, idiot, dull, selfish and narcissistic!

Kai is a nice guy.

After washing up, I changed clothes and went downstairs with Kai, sat at the table, and saw that in the spacious dining room, a real cedar tree was really planted, covered with all kinds of shiny ornaments.

The master, the guests, the servants, all dressed up, happily surround the Christmas tree, singing, dancing, and playing musical instruments like lutes.

Kai asked: "Do you think it's noisy?" ’ I shook my head and started to eat my meal, everyone else finished their Christmas dinner and the party went.I am alone.

"If you sleep again, you will miss this year's Christmas. Fortunately, there is still an hour, and Christmas will be over. Here is a present for you," Kai said.

I have a little conscience now, I am really afraid that he will take another expensive gift, and I will not be able to return the gift.

Back then, when An Feifei sold a house worth several hundred million yuan, I didn't take it seriously.Now I know how much 100 yuan is, and how much hundreds of millions are.

Kai took out a box of chocolates: "I learned from the chef and made it myself while you were sleeping." '

I looked at a box of chocolates in different shapes and said with my lips; "Thank you."

He smiled: "You're welcome."

The gift seemed heavier than the piece of precious metal, which he had made himself.

I have never personally made anything for An Feifan, and he has always given it to me. From this point of view, I am really a typical lazy person.An Feifei is not a masochist, why should he treat me so well

The maid came over with a plate of chocolates and took the top one: "Mr. Bai, this is your Christmas present. Try it, it's purely handmade."

Kai took it and peeled off the gold leaf: "The chocolate made by the pastry chef here is superb, very rich and smooth, just like the advertisement." I handed it over, so I had no choice but to continue.

I really have no interest in western food like coffee and chocolate. I think chocolate is bitter and coffee is also bitter, so I kept it in my mouth without biting it.

A guest came over with a cup and chatted with Kai about antiques.

I don't think there is a taste in my mouth. After the chocolate has melted, there is something wrapped in it. Although it is disguised as a sweet strawberry flavor, there is still a strange taste inside.My sensitive tongue can't stand this.

Showed Kai a WC sign, immediately got up and ran to the bathroom behind the kitchen, immediately spit it out, rinsed his mouth, the smell in his mouth!Rinse again!

Suddenly raised his head, dizzy, spit water, dizzy even worse, almost knocked on the sink.I felt bad, my eyes were dizzy, my hands and feet couldn't move, as if I was stepping on a pile of cotton.

He touched the door, opened it, collapsed in the corridor, a maid passed by, and asked in surprise, "What's wrong with you?"

I tried to stay awake, tried my best, and wrote the word K on the ground with my fingers, but I couldn't remember anything.