you are my star

Sure enough, Yu Chong left the country. Zhao Xingjian didn't know when he left, but when he arrived at Yu Chong's house, he saw that the door of his house had been locked. Zhao Xingjian was standing outside the door looking at the empty courtyard inside. Suddenly, I felt that my heart was empty.

Zhao Xingjian still passed the exam in Beijing, but it was not for Zhao Jingchen at all, it was just close to home so that it was convenient for him to come back.His grades failed to get into Zhao Jingchen's university that he had longed for before, but another school that was slightly worse.Ye Shuya wanted Zhao Xingjian to repeat the exam, because if it hadn't been for these things that happened this year, Zhao Xingjian would have done better in the exam.

Zhao Xingjian insisted on refusing to repeat his studies. Now that his father is gone and his mother is not in good health, he doesn't want to increase the burden on the family. He can go to university and graduate one year earlier, so he can go out to work and earn money one year earlier.

Jiang Nan worked hard in the last half of the semester, his grades improved by leaps and bounds, and he was admitted to Zhao Jingchen's school. Zhao Xingjian was surprised and happy for Jiang Nan at the same time.

Zhao Xingjian and Zhao Jingchen got the same exam, as did Jiang Nan, which made Ye Shuya very relieved. Looking at Zhao Xingjian's back squatting on the ground packing his luggage, she suddenly felt that his life could finally get on the right track.

On the first day of school, Zhao Xingjian didn't let his mother see him off, but set foot on the train going north with Jiang Nan.

On the train, Zhao Xingjian was sitting by the window, staring outside in a daze.Jiang Nan on the opposite side raised his head from the hot air of instant noodles and asked Zhao Xingjian, "Aren't you hungry? Do you want to eat something too?"

Zhao Xingjian shook his head, "No, it will be there in a while."

Zhao Xingjian, who used to bicker with him, suddenly changed, which made Jiang Nan feel very uncomfortable. Although he knew the changes in his family this year and the incident with Yu Chong, Jiang Nan felt that it was over. After such a long time, it's time for Zhao Xingjian to come out, but judging from his current state, it's obvious that he hasn't.

"Well, I heard that Yu Chong has gone abroad?" Jiang Nan didn't know which pot to turn on and which pot to carry. Long-term pain is worse than short-term pain. She wanted to take advantage of this opportunity to persuade Zhao Xingjian.

I haven’t heard Yu Chong’s name from others for a long time, and Zhao Xingjian always tries hard to restrain himself from thinking about him. It seems to have some effect these days, but now Jiang Nan suddenly mentions the word Yu Chong. Zhao Xingjian bumped hard in his heart.

"Yeah, his dad told him to go abroad to study." Zhao Xingjian tried his best to sound calm, but Jiang Nan could still feel the turmoil in his heart at the moment.

"That..." Jiang Nan put down the instant noodle fork in his hand, took out a tissue beside him and wiped his mouth, looked at Zhao Xingjian and said, "I think things are already like this, you should put it down, you are all men, It's pretty good if we are together..." Jiang Nan felt that the person next to him glanced at him, and quickly stopped talking, and waited until the person turned his head away before continuing, "There must be many beautiful girls in college. Not bad, if you get a girlfriend at that time, you might be able to forget him, what if you can't live without him? My aunt and uncle divorced, and I didn't see what happened to her..." Jiang Nan's voice became softer as she spoke, secretly watching Zhao Xingjian's reaction.

Although Jiang Nan's words were not pleasant, Zhao Xingjian knew that she was kind enough to enlighten him, so he turned to Jiang Nan and said, "Thank you, I'm fine now."

Jiang Nan looked at Zhao Xing and saw a layer of mist in his eyes, thinking, lying.

Because Jiang Nan was in the same school as Zhao Jingchen, Zhao Jingchen did his duty as a senior, leading Jiang Nan to run around, finishing all the procedures and settling in the dormitory when it was getting dark.

Jiang Nan thanked Zhao Jingchen with a smile, Zhao Jingchen answered absently, and his heart had already gone to Zhao Xingjian's place.

Jiang Nan saw that Zhao Jingchen was distracted, and asked him, "Brother Jingchen, what are you thinking? How about I invite you to dinner?"

Only then did Zhao Jingchen come back to his senses, and said to Jiang Nan, "Where can I invite you, let me invite you." After speaking, he walked towards the door, and Jiang Nan didn't refuse, so he quickly followed.

After walking two steps, Zhao Jingchen suddenly stopped and turned his head, "How about we meet Xing Xing? Anyway, his school is not far from here, so I invite you two to a restaurant."

Jiang Nan thought for a while, Zhao Xingjian's school is not far from here, but it doesn't seem to be close, but she should be able to come back before ten o'clock, and she also wanted to ask Zhao Xingjian if today's report went well, so Nodding his head, "Okay."

When Zhao Xingjian arrived at the gate of the school, Zhao Jingchen called him and called him out. Zhao Xingjian was wearing wide black and white striped half-sleeves, and underneath was a pair of light-colored jeans that had been washed white. The trouser legs swayed in the night wind. His two legs are like two bamboo poles, so thin that it makes people feel distressed.

Zhao Jingchen went up to pull him and asked, "Is everything going well today? Why didn't you answer my call at noon?"

Seeing the side of his body, Zhao Xing avoided Zhao Jingchen's hand, "It went well, I didn't see a phone call."

Zhao Jingchen withdrew his hand in embarrassment, and said, "Oh, as long as it goes well, let me take you and Jiang Nan to dinner? What did you have for lunch? Are you still used to the food in the school cafeteria?"

Whatever Zhao Jingchen asked, Zhao Xing would answer whenever he saw it. He wasn't impatient, but he didn't show any expression either.

Jiang Nan followed behind the two of them, listening to Zhao Jingchen's words of concern, thinking to himself, it's nice to have an older brother.

Zhao Xingjian didn't like to talk when he was eating, and he only responded when Zhao Jingchen and Jiang Nan asked him. Jiang Nan didn't think there was anything wrong at first, but when he got in touch with Zhao Xingjian, he realized that he was really changed.Jiang Nan sighed in his heart, I really miss Zhao Xingjian who bickered with me in the past, I beg God to bring him back.After thinking about it, he felt something was wrong, Zhao Xing saw that he was not dead yet, so what did he mean by returning him, he quickly said "Bah, bah, bah" a few times in his heart.

Zhao Xingjian's hair grew long, and he didn't have time to cut it. The bangs on his forehead blocked his eyes. Zhao Jingchen wanted to push him away, but before his hand touched him, Zhao Xingjian tilted his head and avoided it.Zhao Jingchen's hands froze in the air, and then he smiled awkwardly at Zhao Xingjian.Zhao Xingjian still didn't respond, and continued to lower his head to eat.

Jiang Nan saw it all, she always felt that Zhao Jingchen and Zhao Xing were very strange when they met, but she couldn't say what was so strange.

The meal was not pleasant, after leaving the restaurant, Zhao Xingjian walked back to school, while Zhao Jingchen took a taxi with Jiang Nan.

In the car, Zhao Jingchen sighed out the window.

Seeing Zhao Jingchen like this, Jiang Nan felt uncomfortable, and thought about it for a while and said to him, "Brother Jingchen, you don't have to worry too much about seeing Zhao Xing, whoever encounters such a thing will not be able to get out for a while , I have known him since I was a child, and Zhao Xing actually became very serious when he saw it. Once he was beaten up and the next day he was stupid enough to be friends with someone. I thought, maybe he changed his environment and stopped thinking about who. He came out after a while." Jiang Nan didn't say Yu Chong's name because he was afraid that Zhao Jingchen wouldn't like to hear it.

Hearing what Jiang Nan said, Zhao Jingchen turned his head from the co-pilot and asked her, "When did Zhao Xingjian get beaten?"

In Zhao Jingchen's impression, although Zhao Xingjian was naughty since childhood, he never caused trouble outside, and he never heard him mention it. The only time he came to Beijing to look for him was when he limped, saying that he had a conflict with his classmates.

"Ah? Don't you know? When he was young, because he was short and thin, he was often bullied by the boys in his class. Later, when he grew up and grew taller, he didn't attract those bad boys so much. In addition, Zhao Xing saw his temper. Well, it seldom happens, so everyone gradually loves to play with him..." Jiang Nan's voice became softer as she spoke, she stared at Zhao Jingchen's side face, and asked in a low voice, "Don't you know? So he I never told you..."

Zhao Jingchen felt a twinge of pain in his heart. He knew that Zhao Xingjian was sensible, but he didn't know that he had learned to report good news and not bad news at a young age, and he had endured so much silently.The child who grew up in a honey pot was not as squeamish as an ordinary child, and was born with tenacity.Zhao Jingchen thought, seeing Zhao Xing separated from Yu Chong, he must have been struggling for a long time, which was too cruel for him.

Zhao Jingchen shook his head and sighed again, "No, he never said that."

"Ah..." Jiang Nan didn't know what to say, she responded and turned her head to look out the window in a daze, thinking that Zhao Xingjian was different from what she thought.

Ushering in the university life, Zhao Xingjian quickly adapted to the new environment. He liked the classmates in his class and the roommates in the dormitory. It seemed that everything was developing in the direction he expected.

Zhao Xingjian and Zhao Jingchen don't communicate often, but they usually have dinner together and go home together.

Jiang Nan has always been a lively person. He often runs between his school and Zhao Xingjian's school. Sometimes when talking about Zhao Jingchen, Jiang Nan seems to know more clearly than Zhao Xingjian.

Zhao Xingjian smiled at Jiang Nan dancing, and asked her, "Why do you come to play with me and keep mentioning my second brother?"

Jiang Nan stopped abruptly, and stammered, "Yes... is there... Isn't Brother Jingchen worried about you and asked me to care about you..."

"Caring about me?" Zhao Xingjian felt that Jiang Nan was speaking incoherently, so he tilted his head and asked her.

"Ah..." Jiang Nan realized that the more he explained, the more confused he became, so he quickly covered his mouth, but he didn't understand why he always liked to mention Zhao Jingchen.He must have taken care of me too much recently, Jiang Nan thought.

Zhao Xingjian tried to make two girlfriends, but each time they reached the stage of holding hands at most.The girls were all beautiful and quiet, but Zhao Xingjian just couldn't like them.

I probably won't be able to be with girls in this life, Zhao Xingjian thought.

After Ye Shuya knew that Zhao Xingjian had a girlfriend, she was very happy, but every time before he brought her home, Zhao Xingjian told her to break up.Ye Shuya was inevitably disappointed in her heart, but she always felt that this was a good start, and the reason why she didn't succeed now was that she hadn't met the right one yet, so just take her time.

In the past two years, Ye Shuya's illness has almost recovered, and she has gradually recovered from the pain of Zhao Haihui's death. Zhao Xing saw his mother showing her usual smile every time she went home, and felt relieved a lot.

Lying on the bed in the dormitory at night, Zhao Xingjian slowly fell asleep thinking about what the teacher said in class.

Zhao Xingjian dreamed of a child. The child was a small ball, crying and crying in Zhao Xingjian's arms. He cried and hurt his head so badly that he was about to explode.He opened his eyes suddenly and sat on the bed, sweating profusely, panting.

Zhao Xingjian slowed down for a long time, then turned his head to see Zhao Si still curled up beside him, breathing evenly.

Ah, it turned out to be a dream...

Zhao Xingjian lay flat on the bed again, squeezed his tense forehead, thinking about the long but real dream just now.It's been a long time since I dreamed of what happened ten years ago. Just now, as if in a movie, those people and things in the dusty memory spread out in Zhao Xingjian's mind, and even when he woke up, he couldn't get rid of it...

From getting acquainted with Yu Chong, falling in love with him, to separating from him, the memory of this period seems to be engraved in Zhao Xingjian's mind, but I don't really remember some things after college. It hurts badly.

Not wanting to think about it anymore, Zhao Xingjian sat up from the bed, afraid of waking Zhao Si, so he tiptoed out of bed.In the living room, Sister Feng had already come and was preparing dinner in the kitchen. When she saw Zhao Xingjian coming out of the bedroom, she quickly leaned out from the kitchen to greet him, "Mr. Zhao, are you awake? I came to see you and Sisi Sleeping soundly, I didn't dare to disturb you, I thought I'll ask you to eat when the food is almost ready."

Zhao Xingjian took a sip of water from the water glass, then smiled at Sister Feng, "It's okay, I'll wake her up later."

Sister Feng is the aunt Zhao Xingjian specially invited to cook at home. She is in her 40s. She looks clean and capable. Surprisingly, Zhao Si didn't like many of the meals cooked by her sister, which saved Zhao Xingjian a lot of effort with her on the issue of eating.

Zhao Xingjian can also cook, but he doesn't do it very well. In addition to his busy work, he doesn't have much time to prepare the daily meals. He simply hired an aunt directly to save time and effort.

Sister Feng left after finishing dinner, Zhao Xingjian woke up Zhao Si to eat, after washing, Zhao Si went to the bedroom to draw again.Zhao Xingjian packed the dishes and chopsticks into the kitchen, waiting for Sister Feng to come to wash them tomorrow, then walked to the sofa in the living room, ready to watch TV for a while before going to sleep.

Looking sleepy again, Zhao Xingjian was nestled on the sofa and began to doze off. The ringing of the mobile phone woke him up. He closed his eyes to touch the mobile phone, then squinted his eyes, and saw that it was an unknown caller. Number, hesitated for a moment or answered.

"Hello."

"Hello, are you the parent of Zhao Si? I'm the teacher of Xingxing Studio. I originally made an appointment with you to go there tomorrow morning, but I have something to do here, so I might not be able to make it in the afternoon. So I made a special call to tell you, I'm really sorry." On the other end of the phone was a young boy's voice, which should be the tutor who had been appointed before.

"Ah, it's okay, as long as you can come over tomorrow." Hearing the guilt and panic of the boy on the other end of the phone, Zhao Xing didn't want to embarrass him, so he hurriedly said it was okay.

"Thank you for your understanding. I will be there on time tomorrow afternoon. Goodbye." The other end thanked her and hung up the phone.

Zhao Si likes to draw, and has a talent for drawing since she was a child. When she was two years old, Zhao Xingjian gave her a pen and a piece of paper, and she could draw a neat circle. Zhao Xing I was surprised and happy when I saw it, and began to train Zhao Si from a young age.

Now it's summer vacation, Zhao Xingjian originally enrolled Zhao Si in a painting tuition class, but recently Zhao Si has been getting sick frequently, Zhao Xingjian was worried about sending him there, so he had to post on the Internet asking for tutoring, and issued a A lot of money.

In just half a day, many studios sent messages to ask. Zhao Xingjian scanned around and chose Xingxing Studio. I don’t know if it’s because his name also has the word star in it. Zhao Xingjian felt very kind .The teacher's name was Lang Yiheng, and he couldn't tell the gender from the name, but it was a boy who just called, Zhao Xingjian thought, he should be Lang Yiheng.A little worried, Zhao Xingjian thought that Sister Feng would come tomorrow and tell her to give her more money so that she could stay at home with Zhao Si during the day, otherwise he was really worried about letting a male teacher come over.