Lie Yan

Many times Jiang Wei felt that without that weird evening, he might be able to play a normal person in this life.

——Of course, he was just Jiang Wei at that time.

It was the summer vacation of the third year of junior high school, and it rained continuously for several days, and finally ushered in a sunny day.Jiang Wei washed all the backlog of clothes and changed the sheets. After drying the clothes, he made an appointment with someone to go swimming by the river.The main reason is that he doesn't want to stay at home. His father will definitely have to call someone to play mahjong at home in the afternoon. Since his mother left, this family has become even more homeless.

The weather is so hot that you can only stay cool in the water, and you will be sweating when you come out of the water.After playing wildly all afternoon and returning home, the boys simply threw their shirts in the basket and rode back shirtless.Jiang Wei went downstairs and locked the car. Instead of going home first, he went directly to the rooftop. He has always been able to delay going home for a while.

He sat alone on the rooftop and listened to the song for a while, and played Snake for a while. He didn't get up to collect his clothes until the sun was about to set and he had to go home to prepare dinner.The bed sheet was too long, and it would be dragged to the floor with his hands. Jiang Wei gathered it to his shoulders, and then pulled all the clothes in his arms.

When I went downstairs, I found that the door of the house was wide open, the small square table for playing mahjong was tilted over, and the mahjong tiles were scattered all over the floor.Maybe he has extra work to do before dinner, and he needs to clean up the mess in front of him.Jiang Wei didn't even bother to ask "Did you play cards and someone overturned the table?", and walked straight into the house with his clothes in his arms.

His father sat there with his legs crossed, saw him coming in, and kicked him habitually: "I came back so late, where did I go wild?"

Jiang Wei didn't speak, he was forced to tilt his body, and half a white sheet slid down from his shoulders, covering his naked upper body.

His father twisted the bottle of Erguotou in one hand, and held the cigarette in the other hand. While puffing, he said sullenly: "Why didn't I realize that you and your bitch look so similar before?" .”

This sentence can be the beginning of all mistakes and nightmares.

When Jiang Wei's mother left home, she left in a hurry, taking away gold and silver jewelry and four bank cards, but she didn't take any clothes, and put them all in a wooden box in the corner.From that day on, Jiang Wei was required to change into those skirts left by his mother when he was at home.

It's not that he didn't try to resist. He hadn't fully grown up at that time, and his figure was thin. His father had a hot temper and great strength when he was drunk. He was no match at all.Every time he was forced to change into women's clothes, he felt extremely ashamed, but what made him even more ashamed was that he didn't seem to be completely repulsed psychologically, and even got some kind of inexplicable pleasure.

That was probably the most serious period of his self-loathing. On the one hand, he felt disgusted by his father, and on the other hand, he felt that he was even more disgusted.At the same time, his father has already started to make a fuss, Jiang Wei tells himself every day that it will be fine after the college entrance examination is over, and he will draw a diagonal line on the map to take the exam to the city farthest from home.But he didn't make it to the college entrance examination, and before his father did anything more egregious, he ran away and took an ID card with him.

Jiang Wei, who ran away, was 17 years old. Five years later, he met Ji Xing for the first time.

At that time, Jiang Wei had accepted his fate and accepted the fact that he was a transvestite.He met some friends with the same hobbies, and they taught him a way to go out in women's clothing: Cosplay.

A certain university held an animation culture festival that day, and Jiang Wei was invited to be a guest.At that time, Ji Xing was still a non-staff member of the animation club, and he was chasing Li Xinyan with all his heart.

Ji Xing worked voluntarily for the animation club for several days. Today was the first day of the event. He almost broke his leg from running all morning. Finally, he trotted all the way to the toilet in the teaching building to drain the water.When I came out to wash my hands, I saw someone in the men's toilet in the mirror.

Ji Xing was stunned for three seconds, then he realized that something was wrong. That person was wearing a high ponytail, a skirt and high heels...Is that a girl? !Ji Xing thought that when she saw the urinal, she would realize that she had gone the wrong way and come out immediately, but she didn't.Fortunately, when he just went to the toilet, there was no one else in it.Ji Xing decided to wait for her at the door for a while, if any boy wants to go in, he can help stop him.

As soon as Jiang Wei came out, she saw an obedient male college student standing at the door waiting for her: "...Is there something wrong?"

"You went to the wrong toilet and you didn't notice?" Ji Xing pointed to the door plate, and couldn't help but say a few more words, "The toilets on other floors of this teaching building are male left and female right, only the one on the first floor is Female left male right, remember? Don’t go wrong next time. Fortunately, today is the weekend and there are not many people. If there are so many people coming and going to class in normal times, there must be boys going in.”

"Are you waiting for me here just to remind me?" Jiang Wei turned her head and asked him while washing her hands.

The 19-year-old boy has never had close contact with girls, and the female classmates around him only wear light makeup. This is the first time Ji Xing has seen such a bright and attractive girl in real life, like a big star walking out of TV , he was a little stuck in his speech: "I, I'm just afraid that some boys who don't know will go in, so I can do it with a little effort."

As soon as the words fell, he received a call from Li Xinyan, asking him where he was being lazy, and he hurried back to the playground.

Jiang Wei came out to join the society at the age of 17. She didn't get much warmth, but experienced a lot of wind and rain, and because of this eccentricity, she inevitably suffered some bullying.Jiang Wei looked at his cute back as he trot away all the way, and felt that this little boy was so innocent that he exploded.

Unexpectedly, half an hour later, they met again in the cafeteria.Ji Xing was carrying ten portions of fast food in each of his left and right hands, and was walking towards the door humming.Jiang Wei's dress and figure were too eye-catching, Ji Xing saw her at a glance, and greeted her first: "Come to eat."

"Hey, we met again." Jiang Wei clenched the meal coupon in her hand, "Actually, I'm not from your school, can I ask you to borrow the meal card?"

"Oh, yes, no problem. Take it yourself, I'm out of hands." Ji Xing's hands were white from being strangled by the plastic bag, and he arched one side of his waist to let her take out the meal card from his jacket pocket.

"Are you from the animation club? Responsible for buying meals?" Jiang Wei glanced at the name of the meal card, Ji Xing.

"Not yet, but I'm working hard!" Ji Xing waited for her to swipe the card, and ran away with twenty boxes of lunch. "I'm leaving first, and they will starve if I don't send them."

Jiang Wei spent a meal in vain, thinking that this kid is not innocent, but purely stupid. He is not a member of the club, so he is busy with other people, and he doesn't know how to find someone to buy so much fast food.

The activity lasted until 04:30 in the afternoon. Jiang Wei met Ji Xing again at the school bus stop, and the little fool was helping to carry the tent.It must be fate that we can meet three times a day.Jiang Wei added his WeChat account with the reason: "In case I get lost in your school, I can ask you for directions."

That's the whole story.Jiang Wei guessed that Ji Xing had a girl he liked just by reading a few posts on Ji Xing's Moments, so she didn't send him any messages. It is estimated that Ji Xing didn't even remember that there was someone like her on WeChat.

But Jiang Wei looks at Ji Xing’s circle of friends from time to time, and feels the daily life of a happy male college student: Today, I rubbed a fat cat huddled up in front of the library. So I was forced to sign up for a 3000-meter long-distance race. The kind counselor approved the leave, and finally officially joined the animation club.Also post a lot of girls he likes and brothers who are very close.

In fact, they are all common to even boring content, but these things are far, far away from Jiang Wei's life.He sometimes thinks that Ji Xing must have been bathed in a lot of love and happiness since he was a child, so that he can grow up so simple and pure.

And he is clearly the opposite of simple and pure.He's a transvestite, he's gay, he's a 1, he's a freak among freaks.

People are always full of curiosity about geeks, they try again and again, and they mistake this curiosity for love.But Jiang Wei knew that curiosity was just curiosity.

Later, Jiang Wei began to work in a bar. This occupation created more convenient opportunities for her to cross-dress. The only disadvantage is that she needs to drink a lot of alcohol frequently.Maybe it's because she inherited the gene of his father's alcoholic, she can drink very well, but if she always drinks like this, her stomach will definitely not be able to bear it.He didn't go to the hospital when he had a stomachache, so he fought alone.

He has never cherished his body, like he doesn't believe that he will be loved one day, maybe it's because the idea of ​​self-abandonment and self-destruction has always been there at the beginning.

——I don’t believe that I will be loved one day, and I still don’t believe it until now.Ji Xing loves Jiang Wei, not Jiang Wei.