Can't cross by oneself

. 29.

What does a person think when they die.

How my life will end.

I am an insider, although I have never been in contact with the circle.Still can often hear their stories and endings.

I don't know what kind of mood they used to end their lives.

nausea.abnormal.dirty.Promiscuous sex.AIDS.

is our full definition.

An acquaintance, not quite a friend, was forced into psychotherapy.Now he is still lying on the hospital bed, not only has no desire for women, but also for men.

When I went to see him, the sunlight hit him for free, and there was an indescribable desolation.He was lying on the bed smiling at me.Very reassuring appearance.Said that he is doing well now, and he will be discharged from the hospital soon.

I asked him if he would obey his parents' arrangements to get married after he was discharged from the hospital?

I still don't want to harm other girls.After leaving the hospital, I want to go to Tibet.He always wanted to go, but he couldn't, so I went to have a look on his behalf.Then I want to convert to Buddhism, practice in the mountains and rivers, and become an ascetic monk.what do you think?

I don't answer.I don't understand why he seems to have a smile on his face.

We were silent for a moment.

He smiled and laughed, and suddenly shed tears, his framed face collapsed, and he kept saying sorry to me in embarrassment and crying.

A mature, handsome, decent man in his 30s.

I wanted to say it's okay, but I opened my mouth but couldn't make a sound.

I don't want to know how painful he is, but I know that there are many people who are more painful than him.

At home, in hospitals, in bars, in deep alleys, in public toilets, on rooftops, in cemeteries.

on the edge of all.

Look how lucky I am.

I put an end to TV and mobile phones.Started to lose sleep.Can't sleep all night.

30.

Mr. Xia said.

I especially hate your mournful look.The future is very long, and no one can tell what will happen in the future.

I know.

He held me in his arms and said helplessly.

You always think a lot, I am most afraid of you like this, entangle yourself tightly, and keep me out.Stop doing this, okay?

I nodded muffled.

The two things I can't bear the most in this world are my mother's tears and Mr. Xia's tenderness.

31.

By the time I stopped having insomnia, Leslie Cheung's affairs had settled down.I will never hear from him on TV or around again.

I never knew why, and I didn't want to know.

I once asked Mr. Xia, if God could grant you three wishes, what would you want?

He said, I want to be with you.

I said, I want everyone to be no longer alone.

He laughed at me hypocritically.Then he sighed and asked, you just don't want to leave me.

I shook my head.

There is a saying, I love you, has nothing to do with you.

I am alone and have nothing to do with you.

32.

Cut the hair by hand.

When one side is cut short, cut the other side short.I accidentally cut too much... so the cycle.

The result is, with a super ugly hairstyle.

I pulled my hair and laughed at myself.

Mr. Xia kept laughing at my hair while eating.

He also said that I look like a dog, but you do.

I can't be bothered to talk to him.It's almost done when he laughs enough.

He strokes my hair at night.

Didn't I say no need to cut it, just keep it longer and look better.

I forgot.

He rubbed it regretfully.

Don't cut it anymore.

Are they that ugly? They're all men, so what's the matter?

It's not ugly, it's ruined.

I'll flatten it tomorrow, okay?

Don't, make it look like you came out of prison.

Get out if you dislike me.

He chuckled and picked up a book to read, but he couldn't help but glance at me.He laughed while watching, but later, he couldn't help it.

He came over and kissed me.

33.

Go to the movies with Mr. Xia.

He wants to watch "Battle Royale 2", I want to watch "Kill Bill", and finally the two of them watched "Detective Conan" together.

Life is so unreal.

There were pirated CDs for sale on the way home, and we each chose one.Go back and watch it on DVD.

34.

We rarely get romantic, get in the way of relationships, and hang out only a handful of times.

Today, Mr. Xia insisted on dragging me to a western restaurant.

Rarely did he drag me out.What embarrassed me was why I went to a western restaurant.

For this reason, I specially checked the restaurant etiquette with the school computer.It's all kinds of things, and it's a headache.

Otherwise, let's not go.

No.

Mr. Xia is lazy and afraid of trouble.But he was surprisingly firm about what he decided on.

Fortunately, it's just a simple dish. If it's lamb ribs, I'm worried that I'll treat the handwashing water as lemon tea and dry it up.

Seeing Mr. Xia cutting the beef pretending to be comfortable, I couldn't hold back my smile.You can tell how nervous he is just by looking at his straight waist.

After eating and drinking enough, we went home together, and he took the initiative to hold my hand.

I am amazed.

I pretend to be drunk if anyone walks by.

Ok.

A woman with a child came towards me. I pushed him to signal, but Mr. Xia remained indifferent for some reason and still held my hand tightly.

open!

He pulled tightly and told me not to move softly.

The woman didn't notice anything, but her child stared at us with bright eyes.

Just passing by them, Mr. Xia leaned over and kissed me on the mouth.The fine beard stubble is a little painful to grind.

The child turned his head to look, and I felt tense all over.Only heard his light low laugh.

happy Birthday.

Mr. Xia's romance is like a secret.

35.

When Loo's daughter does not die,

Wine is endless.

Where my boyhood was,

Indeed it can be here.

Mr. Xia, let's go to Tibet.

It's too far away, I don't want to go.

I want to go.

what happened?

I'm going to see the girl of my dreams.

I rely on!

He pinched my ass like hell.

Can you say that again!

let go let go!He has been dead for hundreds of years, what are you afraid of?

Who?

Cangyang Gyatso.

Mr. Xia doesn't understand my feelings, and I don't expect him to understand.I just like him to be cheerful and live his own life every day.

That friend will definitely not be able to go to Tibet after all, and I think he knows it himself.What was waiting for him was an unknowing newlywed woman, supervised by her parents, living a happy life like the mortal world.

But I don't guarantee that he will break down one day.Just like his former lover.

I dare not think about it.

If you don't accompany me, I will go by myself.

stay with you stay with you.

Mr. Xia rubbed his forehead in pain.

I smiled and hugged him.

36.

This is the first time I met the same kind on this occasion.

Public toilets near the park.

He suddenly touched me and kneaded me lightly or heavily.

I was frightened and panicked, and I slammed my elbow back.

He let go of me in pain and asked in disbelief.

you are not?

I quickly pulled up my pants.

Our group is like opposites attract, we can keenly find the same kind in the crowd, and the accuracy rate is almost [-]%.

He is a man in his 30s, looks like he should be married, in sportswear, with a medium build and a medium appearance.The kind of person you can't find in a crowd.I don't know if they made themselves like this on purpose.

Pity suddenly rose in my heart.

I am, but I have a lover.

He seemed not to believe it.

How can people like us have lovers.

But he didn't do anything else, and glanced at me complicatedly.

I wish you happiness.

Just left.

Feeling weak all over, I miss Mr. Xia very much.

Go back and take a serious shower.