Break up

It is easy to think about many things, but difficult to say them.Because there is always something to expect.Tang Yi's heart knot with Lin Rui has been around for a long time, so long that he almost has a physical aversion to this name, and he feels agitated when he mentions him.

At the beginning, he was afraid that he was narrow-minded, so he chose to endure under the rage.However, he was destined not to be a person who could really bear it. His knots became tighter and tighter, and all kinds of hatred and grievances were buried in him until he couldn't bear it anymore, and finally broke out.

It's not that he hasn't discussed this issue with Gu Yanting. The first time the two quarreled was because of Lin Rui. Before they broke up, Tang Yi also asked Gu Yanting's attitude many times. The difference was that at that time he believed that Gu Yanting was hopeless. The night Lin Rui just came back and the night Lin Rui had an accident, Gu Yanting's performance didn't give him the slightest hope.

Even though later Gu Yanting said that he took Lin Rui as a friend as a classmate as a benefactor, and even had less contact with Tang Yi, but Tang Yi no longer believed it. He felt that it was just Gu Yanting's plan to slow down the army. , Why bother to break up.

But after breaking up, he couldn't really let go.He and Gu Yanting were very young when they met. In the later years, the two of them lived hand in hand, renting a house, looking for a job, eating out, and then buying a house to repay the loan. There was a burden on his shoulders, and ambition and desire in his heart.For the first time in Tang Yi's life, someone has been by his side for a long time. The two of them have the feeling of living together, and the place they are in has finally become a home.

If possible, he doesn't want to say hate.

The waiter delivered the appetizers in style, and the beautifully plated foie gras and scallops were placed in the center of the table.After Tang Yi said this, his expression gradually calmed down, but he still couldn't whet his appetite for this expensive thing, so he leaned against the back of the sofa and turned his head to avoid Gu Yanting's sight.

Gu Yanting was silent the whole time. He had been looking forward to this conversation for a long time. He knew that Tang Yi had a knot in his heart, but he still didn't know how deep the knot was.

It took him a while to open his mouth, his face was flushed after a cold, but his tone was low and firm, "What kind of distance between Lin Rui and I is acceptable to you? Or in other words, do you want me to treat him well?" What kind of attitude, even more detailed, what can be done and what can't be done, what can be said and what can't be said, when can we meet and when can't we meet..."

"These can be determined by you, and I will obey."

He underestimated Tang Yi's concern about these things at the beginning, but now that he thinks about it, whether he sent Lin Rui home in front of Tang Yi or asked Lin Rui to stay, it undoubtedly deepened Tang Yi's frustration with him Feeling cold.

He paused and said: "He is indeed special to me. I was slightly autistic in high school. When I got into a car accident, I was pessimistic and world-weary because of the rejection of my classmates. He saved me at that time. He unintentionally helped me open my heart...Before I met you, being nice to him almost became my habit. I didn't think about whether it was right to do so, and I didn't think about whether it would hurt you later. It is my fault."

"However, Tang Yi, if you really can't accept it, I can change all of these. You can decide how far I can go, and I will never cross the line. But...you can't just push me away if you just say you push me away, even Not even a chance to make corrections."

Gu Yanting hasn't said such a long word for a long time, and this time he said it in one breath, his chest finally became smooth, and he stared right into Tang Yi's eyes.

Tang Yi and him looked at each other for a while and then slowly turned away. He understood what Gu Yanting meant, and it even sounded reasonable, but now his heart is very confused. It was impulsive to ask Gu Yanting out today. He felt stuffy in his chest because of Shen Fan's "unyielding" evaluation, and was eager to get rid of all the people related to Lin Rui, the first to bear the brunt was Gu Yanting.

But he was so unprepared for such a conversation that now he regrets it.

Tang Yi unconsciously stirred the soup in front of him. He didn't know how to answer, so he shook his head for a while, "It's not necessary."

Gu Yanting: "...Why isn't it necessary?"

"The days to come are too long, and no one can guarantee anything. If you don't see him, it doesn't mean you don't want to see him. Now that you're making a compromise for me, you might regret it someday and go find him."

"...But I have never had anything to do with him." Gu Yanting took a deep breath, a little speechless, "I made a mistake because I didn't grasp the scale well. I crossed the line when I was nice to him, but this is not a principled mistake!"

At the end of the conversation, he was slightly agitated, and his voice became louder by two points.

Other diners who were dining next to him turned their heads slightly, Tang Yi frowned, and lowered his voice to remind him, "Slow down your voice."

This is one of the most high-end western restaurants in T city, Tang Yi faintly regretted setting the meeting place here.After all, most of the people who come to eat are talking in low voices, paying great attention to etiquette.As soon as Gu Yanting's voice came down, at least four or five tables of people had already looked over quietly.

Gu Yanting glanced at him, and suddenly sneered, "...No."

Tang Yi: "..."

"If you want to talk today, let's talk about it clearly. If it's not convenient to talk here, we'll change places. Two years ago, you told me to pat your ass and leave. After two years, you can't let me be so aggrieved, Tang Yi, Death row inmates still have the right to speak in defense, just because you just kicked me out of the house with a cold and fever today, you can't let me suffocate to death here."

Tang Yi couldn't, even if he wasn't thinking about him, he would be thinking about the obviously embarrassed and worried waiter not far away.

Gu Yanting saw that his expression was relaxed, so he quickly called the waiter to settle the bill first. When signing the bill, he glanced at Tang Yi who was obviously out of shape and was rubbing his brows, paused and said, "There is a square not far ahead, just where to go."

At the end of November, T City already smelled of icy breath. Tang Yi went to the restaurant directly from the company, wearing only a suit.When Gu Yanting went out, he pulled him, took off his coat and put it on him.

When Tang Yi came to his senses, Gu Yanting had strode forward. His shadow was stretched by the street lights and reflected off. Tang Yi wiped his face irritably, and simply put his feet on the stretched, slender head. superior.Then he quickened his pace and followed.

The small square is not far from here. It is said that the square is actually a small open park, with an open space in front and a hill in the back.When the weather is warm, the nearby citizens will dance here. The best thing to see is a male teacher teaching tango.It's just that it's so cold right now, there's no one left in the square.Gu Yanting didn't stop walking when he arrived at the place, he walked to the top of the slope three or two times before stopping and turning around to look at him.

Tang Yi hesitated for a moment, and followed.

The slope is not high, and there is no view when looking down, only a few trees rustling with the wind.Tang Yi was about to take off the coat he was wearing, but Gu Yanting grabbed him when he raised his hand.

Gu Yanting's eyes were surprisingly bright, Tang Yi raised his eyes to look at him, and heard him laugh coldly, "Tang Yi, I didn't finish talking in the restaurant just now, in fact, when talking about getting back together, it should be because I have a lump in my heart, right? .”

Tang Yi's movements paused, and he looked up at him suddenly, "What do you mean?"

"What do I mean? Don't you understand?"

Gu Yanting let go of his hand, and his attitude was almost different from the gentle appearance in the restaurant. He lowered his head sideways and stared at Tang Yi's eyes. After a while, his eyes fell down, and fell on the latter's lips. At the same time, he raised his hand to gently cover it with his thumb, rubbed it, and asked with a sneer, "Here... has he touched it?"

Tang Yichi was stunned for a moment and reacted violently. A feeling of shame turned into anger made his face burn. He never thought that Gu Yanting called him out of the restaurant on purpose to say this. He threw off his clothes violently. When Gu Yanting pushed away, the coat also fell to the ground.

Gu Yanting coughed twice when his hand was thrown away. Instead of bending down to pick it up, he looked at Tang Yi's trembling hands clenched into fists and smiled.

"You said you mind Lin Rui, but you haven't thought about it, do I mind if you kiss me and hug me with others these two years?!" Gu Yanting's voice was a little gritted, and his eyes were fixed on Tang Yi from beginning to end. "Do you know that I almost ran over to my death when you were spending the spring night with other men! Christmas Eve is very lively, isn't it? Huh? Do the new underwear fit? You can't eat an apple on Christmas Eve to keep you safe?"

The evil fire in Tang Yi's heart slowly turned into doubts after hearing this, and he didn't react until the "underpants" later.

In the darkness, only the light from the small square could faintly shine through, vaguely outlining Gu Yanting's tense cheeks, his eyebrows and eyes were full of anger, looking at Tang Yi's expression as if he was trying to suppress something.

Tang Yi was silent for a while, then suddenly asked, "Did you make that call?"

Gu Yanting's eyes flickered for a moment, needless to say, the two of them already knew each other well.Tang Yi didn't understand what he meant by "almost killed". He wanted to ask a question at this moment, but then he thought it was a lot of trouble-it was obvious that the two who had broken up wanted to break up further. What's the point of those things.

He sighed, and finally nodded slowly, "Since this is the case, shouldn't it be better to stay away. You see, I am in love with your past, and you are in love with mine, so there is no need to talk about it."

Gu Yanting snorted heavily from his nose, "You don't need to rush to get rid of the relationship, Tang Yi, I mind, but I can bear it, because I can't let you go, my feelings for you are better than these rags Much heavier! I f*ck want to live with you so this can be sorted out!"

"You said you were afraid that my old love would never be forgotten, so I'm not afraid? At most, I'm just being mean to Lin Rui and spending the New Year with my mouth, but you've been shaken both mentally and physically!"

Tang Yi's mind exploded with a bang, and he stared fiercely at the past, and when he opened his mouth to say something, Gu Yanting preempted him.

Gu Yanting's chest heaved violently, and his voice became hoarse, with a chill in his voice, "If you see someone else, just say it, don't play like this, the double standard is too serious?! Why do you put a big hat on my head? I have to admit it once it’s buckled? It’s been two years since that shitty thing has passed and can’t be uncovered? I’m so fucking subdued to this point. If you don’t have feelings for me at all, just say it, and don’t use Lin Rui as an excuse. ! Unless you just fell in love with someone else and kicked me away in a hurry!"

"You!!" Tang Yi's face turned pale, and he was so angry that he didn't know what to say. He couldn't help but punched him, but Gu Yanting grabbed his wrist.

When he gets along with Gu Yanting, he has always been the dominant one. Gu Yanting used to be stupid and never talked about him. Today, he was stimulated by Shen Fan's "unyielding" and "talked" to Gu Yanting, but he didn't think of saying anything. , the latter was so forceful that he would be mad at him to death.

But every sentence of Gu Yanting sounded reasonable, and Tang Yi's Adam's apple rolled up and down several times, knowing that something was wrong, but he couldn't find anything to refute.

"I want to shut up, but I have to let you know that you have had another boyfriend in the past two years, but my life is worse than that of a monk. I think about you every day and every night. You may be touched by other men and I will almost go crazy. I sleep at night and dream of you. I have to hug your shirt even if I masturbate, otherwise I won’t be hard..."

Gu Yanting saw Tang Yiqi's body shaking, his lips moved and his breath eased.

After a while, he still let go of Tang Yi's arm, and gently stretched out his hand up and down on Tang Yi's back.He lowered his voice, and his tone was not as aggressive as before, but rather coaxing, "I know that you are angry with me. I was the one who was wrong before, and you have punished me. But our future The days are still long, let him pass the past, can't we start again?"

At the end of the last sentence, he bent down slightly, and softly hummed next to Tang Yi's ear, the breath evoked by his nasal voice was slightly seductive.Tang Yi finally breathed slowly in his arms, and closed his eyes in silence until his breath gradually calmed down.

Gu Yanting didn't dare to get too close, and stroked Tang Yi's back rhythmically with his palms. When Tang Yi slowly opened his eyes and his beautiful eyes met his gaze, he felt a little expectation in his heart.

Tang Yi looked at him for a while, and finally said slowly, "What a provocative way, congratulations to Mr. Gu, you won't be able to get along in Huayuan in the future, with this ability, you can get a golden rooster and golden monkey in the entertainment circle, for sure Can't die of hunger."

His voice was very soft, and after his emotions calmed down, his eyes were bright and bright, shining like jumping fire clusters.

Under normal circumstances, Tang Yi was determined not to listen to what others said, but he was in a daze today. Gu Yanting didn't know how he saw the clues in the restaurant, and simply fought back with anger and resentment.First, he said that the Christmas event caused Tang Yi to feel guilty, and then he used Zhou Hao to explain his grievance and sadness. He used the right time, place and people over and over again, and Tang Yi, who just wanted to provoke Tang Yi, admitted that he still had feelings for him.

Gu Yanting's body froze for a moment, but he maintained the hugging posture without moving.The two of them looked at each other and refused to speak first. After a while, Gu Yanting sighed, and slowly lowered his head and buried his face in Tang Yi's neck.

He whispered, "Tang Yi, how do you know that I'm not sad, not sad..."

This sentence is much lighter than the previous long speech, more like a helpless sigh, but the meaning of sadness is very strong.Tang Yi hesitated for a moment, but did not move.

Gu Yanting slowly tightened his arms, and exhaled softly, "When we were together, I always said to break up because I knew that you would not agree. Every time you refused, I felt very sad. Happy, that kind of feeling is like having something that you are afraid of losing. You are always afraid that it is not glued enough or fastened tightly enough, so you can’t help but tug and push. When you can’t push it away Only then is my heart at ease."

"But in fact, I was also afraid in my heart. I was afraid that if you answered me with a good word... until you brought it up first."

It took four or five years for those trivial things to count. When Gu Yanting had conflicts, he often said to break up, but Tang Yi thought it was because Gu didn't pay enough attention to this relationship. He blamed himself for losing the lover first. In fact, apart from being stubborn, my heart was full of disappointment.

Gu Yanting gave a wry smile, slowly raised his head, and said softly, "Break up with courage, regardless of intention. I understand too late, so I can only put my heart on this, whether you call me a hooligan or a rascal, I will start with you first." The first time I mentioned the matter of breaking up, I didn't agree to half a word. I didn't agree to you breaking up your hand before, but now I don't agree, and I won't agree to it if I spend my whole life with you!"

Tang Yi's eyes drooped slightly, and his dense eyelashes trembled a few times.He never thought that one day he and Gu Yanting would switch positions. Gu Yanting's confession was once what he longed for. He had firmly believed that Gu Yanting liked Lin Rui better, and his relationship with him was just a back-and-forth and passive acceptance.

The night wind swirled the fallen leaves, Gu Yanting approached slowly, and finally kissed the corner of his mouth lightly, then backed away slightly, and then softly kissed Tang Yi's chin , on the lips, on the face, on the tip of the nose.

Finally, when Tang Yi trembled and closed his eyes, Gu Yanting carefully kissed his eyes, and finally fell on the center of his brows, and said in a low voice, "I'm sorry, it's all my fault."

When Tang Yi first started doing business, in order to quickly master negotiation skills, he read a lot of psychological theories. Although most of them were forgotten after reading, they were of no use, but there was a "Festinger's Law" that made him Impressive - 10% of your life is what happens to you, and the other 90% is how you react to what happens.

For example, what Gu Yanting did to Lin Rui, if Tang Yi handled it in another way, it would probably have a better result.Even if he erupted directly when he was angry for the first time, it was either that Gu Yanting realized his problem earlier, or the two of them broke up early.

These two results, no matter which one is much better than the situation three years ago, at least when we broke up when we first got together, at most there was some regret and unwillingness, and it was better than the later mingling too deep and the splitting of muscles and bones. better off.

What happened to Lin Rui was the trigger, but the crux of the matter lay in their mutual trust and communication.

Tang Yi never thought about how to completely untie his knot in the future and accept Gu Yanting.But I have to say, Gu Yanting's words tonight, word by word, fell right on his heart.He once longed for this scene, but his inner weakness defeated himself first, making him dare not have any expectations for the future.

Gu Yanting kissed him gently one by one, and said sorry in a low and slow voice. When Tang Yi regained his composure and stretched out his hand to cover his face, Gu Yanting's eyes darkened, and he kissed him lightly with his mouth, and said, "Now change your mind." I'm coming to chase you, you don't have to rush to agree, and don't care about other things, let's take our time, shall we?"

Although he asked if he was okay, his tone was very firm.

Tang Yi was silent for a while, and asked after a while, "How is your job now?"

Gu Yanting might as well ask this out of the blue, and nodded, "Very good."

"Do you like it? Is there a future?"

"I like it very much, and the future... is not bad."

Tang Yi hummed, and finally asked, "If I don't want you to do it, what should you do?" After he asked this, he began to regret it. This kind of childish tone of anger really shouldn't have come from him, and at this time It doesn't necessarily make sense to get an answer.

Gu Yanting smiled, but replied quickly, "Between you and work, I choose you."

Tang Yi was slightly taken aback, and saw Gu Yanting looking at him seriously, and said, "Don't underestimate your position in my heart. I know it's useless to say this now, but I still want you to know. If you don't believe me, you can wait for me Let me show you slowly."

On the way back, the coat was still draped over Tang Yi's body. Gu Yanting's face was abnormally red, but the corners of his mouth almost reached the ears.

Tang Yi didn't agree to him, but being able to acquiesce in his presence was already another form of concession.The two sat in the taxi without talking all the way. Gu Yanting stretched out a hand to hold Tang Yi's shortly after he sat down. Tang Yi was caught by him shortly after he avoided it, and finally interlocked his fingers helplessly. all the way.

After returning home, Gu Yanting took the initiative to be a dog nanny. Tang Yi always felt that the dog Shen Fan gave him was far more troublesome than comforting. Besides, he had an accident in the company shortly after receiving the little guy, and he has not been able to do so until now. Solved, this dog probably isn't immune to separation anxiety.What happened tonight was completely beyond his expectation, and it was only when he got home that he felt a little embarrassed.Therefore, he didn't even realize that it was wrong to watch the patient work.

He wasn't ready to start over, but obviously Gu Yanting couldn't wait any longer. The latter's offensive was too fierce, and he was caught off guard with a devastating force. Tang Yi faintly felt that he didn't fully react now. Gu Yanting knew the way well. He was even a little dazed when he gave Fanfan some chewing gum and toys, and hummed a song to clean up the shit and pee in the toilet.In the end, he could only silently dig out the antipyretics and put them on the coffee table.

When Gu Yanting was taking medicine, Tang Yi took the initiative to come over. Tang Yi was reading on the sofa, and the page stayed there for a long time without turning it. Gu Yanting drank the pills and moved to his side, and suddenly asked, "Are you unhappy today?"

"..."

"I mean before you asked me out," Gu Yanting lowered his head slightly, and leaned closer, but his voice was still hoarse, "Did something happen? Or did someone say something to you?"

Seeing Tang Yi turn his head, he said comfortingly, "There is no Huoyan Mountain that cannot be passed. If you encounter a problem, you can find a solution. If there is no trick, just go with the flow. Doesn't it mean that the boat will be straight when it reaches the bridge?"

Someone said this sentence to Tang Yi before, but this kind of comfort has no real meaning, and you don’t have to take full responsibility for saying something beautiful. In the future, the only one who will be burned to death in the Flame Mountain, Tang Yi was helpless when he heard it in the past Most of them, but today I feel inexplicably that there seems to be a little truth.

He was silent for a while, put down the book in his hand, leaned on the sofa and asked Gu Yanting, "What if it doesn't work?"

"Did something happen to you? At work?"

"...Yes," Tang Yi paused, "There is a problem with the contract you Huayuan signed with our company."