heavy rock

Chong Yan was a little confused.

Is really confused, say forty is not confused.He is looking at people who are also running around, but why is it that he can't understand this world more and more?What he originally thought was good or bad, turned out to be completely different from another angle.It's like a kaleidoscope, obviously just a paper tube, a handful of scraps of paper and two pieces of glass, but with a slight flick of your finger, the pattern you see changes completely.

He thought Zhang He was his most solid ally, but now he feels that he is only thinking about his own selfishness; he thinks that the Li family brothers are cruel, and looking at it now, they just want to defend their own interests; Lonely, even his blood is cold, but after getting to know him, he realized that he just hid his own temperature, and he would smile warmly and comfortably; when.

Or, "Forty without confusion" means that when people are in middle age, they will find that there is often a certain deviation between what they knew when they were young and the truth.Because people at that time have been pushed to a completely different height by age and experience from when they were young, they can see more different sides of the same thing—because they have seen each side and know the overall situation of things. look, so no longer have doubts.

That's why we are in awe of everything in this world and life itself.

Chong Yan didn't know how to treat the past between his parents. He always believed that Yang Shu should not be entangled with Li Chengyun. She should study hard, return to Linhai hometown after graduation, marry an honest person, and live a stable life.But some catastrophes in fate will not disappear automatically just because you don't expect them to come.She fell in love with Li Chengyun, accepted his pursuit, loved him and trusted him until this fragile trust was destroyed by the truth.

She is not smart enough, if she was smart, she would not let herself and a man like Li Chengyun fall into the vortex of feelings; she is not stupid enough, she can't do no turning back, and wholeheartedly regard love as the most important thing in this world.

In just a few hours, the direction of fate has changed drastically.

Chong Yan even subconsciously began to imagine that if she left a few hours late and eloped to Linhai with Li Chengyun, what would happen to the matter?Perhaps Yang Shu's life will be happier and more relaxed, and Zhang Yuegui will not become such a mean and tricky old lady before he was exhausted and passed away so early; perhaps Li Chengyun will be killed by the Li family The people behind him chased him back, and Zhang Yuegui and Yang Shu would be made things difficult by the Li family, and life would be even more difficult...

Who knows?

Chongyan sat on the swing seat of the flower shop and sighed.What has never happened, who knows what will happen in the future?No one can predict what will happen in the next minute or second, let alone a few hours?

However, Chong Yan still felt sorry.If fate can generously reward Yang Shu for these few hours, if Yang Shu can see Li Chengyun appearing in front of her with luggage, even if he fails to go with her in the end, then this relationship will remain in her heart memory will be completely different.At least until she dies, she'll think she's been loved and taken seriously, not lied to.

However, the past cannot be changed.

When Chong Yan, who was in a trance, met Zhang He again in the flower shop, he suddenly had a strange urge to tear off this gentle mask and see what kind of face was hidden underneath.If possible, he really wanted to hear the secret thoughts hidden in the deepest part of this man's heart.

Qin Dongyue reminded himself that it is best to keep a distance from Zhang He.Chong Yan also felt that Zhang He had ulterior motives before, and he would feel upset when he looked at him, and many things in his previous life became blurred.Chong Yan doesn't like the feeling of being denied his previous experience.This can make him doubt his own judgment.But if he hadn't been in contact with him, Chong Yan wouldn't have noticed so many strange things, such as "The Picture of Misty Rain on Lishan Mountain".

Chongyan doesn't want the mysteries in his memory to remain mysteries forever.

An hour later, Chong Yan and Zhang He were sitting in a Chinese restaurant, and the window was cloudy, as if it was gestating the last heavy snow after the beginning of spring.

Zhang He poured him half a glass of wine, with a gentle and sincere smile, as if he had become the reliable elder in Chong Yan's memory again, "This is the medicinal wine made by myself in the store, it will not be over-filled, and it is milder in nature. Try it?"

Chong Yan thanked him, raised his wine glass and touched him lightly.

After drinking a cup, Chong Yan felt slightly dizzy, as if his young body, who drank baijiu for the first time, couldn't stand the soft and powerful alcohol.

Chong Yan leaned back in his seat and panted slightly, a familiar sense of anxiety rose in his heart.Sitting opposite him, Zhang He slowly talked about his chemical plant and futures prices.His voice was far and near, and a layer of cold sweat slowly broke out on Chong Yan's forehead.

"Chongyan," Zhang He's voice seemed to come from far away, "Chongyan, are you okay?"

Chong Yan held his head in his hands, and suddenly he couldn't tell where he was sitting.Countless pictures kept rotating and changing in front of his eyes, and finally they were frozen in his former office.On the large green sandalwood desk, a document was spread out on the table, and there was a half cup of green tea next to it, with a lingering fragrance.A little farther away, there is a purple pottery flowerpot, and a musk orchid with delicate branches and leaves blooms quietly.He saw his hand holding a pen, signing the document, and handing it to the man across the desk.

Chong Yan couldn't see his face clearly, but he knew that it was Li's lawyer, and what he just handed over was his will.Sitting behind this desk again, Chong Yan suddenly remembered why he made a will at this age.Because just a few days ago, his staff submitted an investigation report to him about Zhang He's private acquisition of Li's shares.

Chong Yan suddenly remembered his feelings when he saw this report: anger, anxiety, uneasiness and vague fear.

At that time, he had already noticed Zhang He's ambition, and he had also seen his omnipotent means of competition in business operations.Chongyan knew that he would not stop, as long as he was alive, he would greedily eat away at Li Shi's rich fruit like a moth.He regarded every inch of Chongyan's expanded territory as his own trophy, but now, the feeling of just standing behind Chongyan could no longer satisfy him.

Chongyan made a will, returning the Li family to Li Yanqi in its entirety after his death.He knew that with Li Yanqi's ability, it was impossible to expand the Li family's empire by a quarter in ten years. Chong Yan didn't feel any guilt in his heart for everything he had done.He knew that the people of the Li family would only look at him with a mixture of hatred and appreciation.

Then what did he do?

Chong Yan huddled in his seat, his eyes wandering.He knew that he was immersed in the illusion again and couldn't extricate himself. What did the doctor say about him?

When Chong Yan thought this way, he seemed to hear the voice of the middle-aged doctor again. He was describing his condition to Zhang He, and at that time he was standing outside the concealed door and eavesdropping, "...Yes, yes A mild mental illness, the patient lives under great pressure for a long time... Anxiety... Depressive symptoms for a long time, right? The pressure cannot be vented, and hallucinations will appear, and this situation will gradually deepen... "

As expected, the number of hallucinations gradually increased, and Chong Yan became more and more desperate.It's not a good feeling to know that one day in the future, I will completely lose my mind.He has no relatives, not even friends, and the only person he can trust around him has become strange now.

"Chongyan," someone whispered his name in his ear, "Chongyan, have you ever seen "The Picture of Misty Rain in Lishan Mountain"?"

Chong Yan thought in a daze, what is "The Picture of Misty Rain in Lishan Mountain"?a painting?

"Have you seen it?" The voice asked anxiously, "Where did you see it?"

Chong Yan replied blankly: "Zhang He, why do you want that painting? If you want...why didn't you tell me directly? Why didn't you just tell me?" He really wanted to tell him that when he took down Li Chengyun's study room When I read the "Lishan Misty Rain Picture" in the book, I really thought it was the real one.It never occurred to him to fool him with a fake.Although he couldn't understand the truth, Zhang He could. Why didn't he say it?Is it because at that time, Zhang He had already doubted him?Or did Zhang He never believe him at all from the beginning to the end?

"You want...I'll give it to you..." Chongyan thought a little aggrieved, he trusted him so much at that time, and never planned to lie to him.

Chong Yan knew that it was Zhang He who was talking, and his voice was full of anxiety, which was completely different from the calm and calm look in the past.But he didn't remember that Zhang He had ever said such a thing to him.Maybe reliving it once is like reformatting a hard drive, and in the process, he will inevitably lose part of his memory?

"Do you know where "The Picture of Misty Rain in Lishan Mountain" is kept?" Zhang He shook his shoulders vigorously, with a bewitching tone in his voice, "Did Li Chengyun mention it to you? Is it hidden in Li's house?"

"I know," Chong Yan murmured, "I know everything. Zhang He, I know that you only wanted one painting at first, and then you wanted to get involved in the Li family... and later... you wanted the entire Li family to belong to you. You all... have you read the story of "The Fisherman and the Goldfish"? You are like the greedy old woman in the story..."

"You shit," Zhang He's voice became angry, "What goldfish? An old woman? I asked you where exactly is "The Picture of Misty Rain in Lishan Mountain"?"

Chong Yan heard something buzzing at his hand, he held it down, and then a familiar voice with anxiety rang in his ear, "Chong Yan, where are you?"

Chong Yan opened his eyes vigorously, and saw a corner of the park appeared in the dazzling light circle, with green grass, pigeons flying under the blue sky, playful children holding colorful balloons, and... holding a light green ice cream towards him Zhang He walked over with a smile on his face.

Chong Yan felt a severe pain in his heart.

He suddenly found the source of his trust in Zhang He in his previous life.

It was his first birthday after he met Zhang He. Zhang He took him to a big meal to celebrate. After the meal, they went for a walk in a nearby park, rowed boats and fed pigeons together.During the break, Zhang He bought him a matcha-flavored ice cream—that was Chong Yan's most tender fantasy about the role of his father since he was a child.

When Chong Yan woke up, his eyes were dim, and there was only one night light on in the ward.A tall figure was lying beside the bed, wearing a dark down jacket, and seemed to be asleep.From his vantage point only his profile, the shape of his ears and thinly shaved sideburns can be seen.

It's Qin Dongyue.

Chong Yan's head was dizzy, swollen and painful, his temples were throbbing, his throat was very dry, and he felt dizzy when he moved a little, and he felt like vomiting.Chong Yan turned around with difficulty, only to find that one of his hands was being held by Qin Dongyue.As soon as he moved, Qin Dongyue woke up immediately, raised his head to meet his gaze, and the alert look in his eyes suddenly turned into surprise, "Are you awake?"

Chong Yan moved the corner of his mouth slightly.

Qin Dongyue let go of his hand, got up and poured a glass of warm water over, and carefully inserted a straw.Chong Yan drank half a glass of water in one breath, feeling as if his whole body had come alive, and heaved a long sigh of relief, "Am I getting sick again?" He often had this kind of situation in the last few years of his previous life, and he couldn't restrain himself. Lost mental control, fell into hallucinations and couldn't extricate himself, and the degree of depression was also aggravated.During the year of rebirth, he never had an attack, and Chong Yan once thought he had recovered.

Qin Dongyue gently rubbed his face with the back of his hand, and said angrily, "I'm stupid! I told you to stay away from Zhang He, but you just refused to listen."

Chong Yan forced a smile, it was quite stupid.Knowing that Zhang He would arouse his doubts about the previous life and those negative emotions, but the urge to find out the root causes him to ignore the danger.

"Don't do this again." Qin Dongyue was terrified, "This time he gave you a hallucinogen, what if he gave you an ecstasy next time?"

Chong Yan's heart skipped a beat, "Hallucinogens?!"

"It's diacetamide." Qin Dongyue bent a finger and tapped his forehead lightly, "Using too much of these things can cause mental disorders, anxiety, depression, and insanity. It's very dangerous. The most terrifying thing is that using these There will also be 'flashback symptoms', even when no medicine is taken, and the duration is variable, a few minutes, hours or even days, and in severe cases, it may even cause mood changes and even suicide - the doctor told me these I was almost scared to death!"

It was as if Chong Yan had been hit by a sap, and he was dumbfounded.

Hallucinogens, long-term use, anxiety, depression, insanity... When these words are connected together, an unbelievable fear arises in Chong Yan's heart.