This must not be written by me

The weather in the past few days has been particularly sultry. Although the Huangshan Valley is not too hot, it is unavoidably humid.

Only a few days after the master's ascension, Mihua's small bamboo house was already so damp that it was about to grow mushrooms. Lin Chenchu ​​was at the bottom of Mihua's bed, looking at Mihua's dirty mess under the bed with distaste. Socks, groping under the dark bed.

Um?What?You say I'm missing a plot?Haven't you seen the pictures of young boys kissing with passion?Hey, how can I write that kind of stuff when I am so serious, (snap! The morals are dropped, smashed to pieces).

Cough cough, I am not a little white text of a brain-dead loli, the last time I saw the plot of "delivery with saliva and tongue" was in "Strange Tales from a Liaozhai Studio" that existed hundreds of years ago, and It was after the male protagonist was sexually assaulted by two female protagonists every night, that he ran out of oil and was in urgent need of medical treatment. It may be difficult for our article to read the male protagonist’s exhaustion... This guy’s physical strength is not comparable to that of a scholar of……

ah?You ask me how did Zhong Panji eat the medicinal herbs?It's very simple, Lin Chenchu ​​just picked out the leaves that were sticking to Zhong Panji's saliva, and ate them into the medicinal paste "mixed with saliva", and I would like to remind everyone that this world of self-cultivation , there is a very magical thing called "spiritual power".

As for Man'er, Lin Chenchu ​​also compensated her enough Burning Sun True Fire at once, and then helped her build a phantom array as a defense. Although it can't last for hundreds of years, if Zhu Guoshu has something to do, add some spiritual power to it It should be able to last for three or four years.

Well, after the explanation is over, I will continue to write.

After waking up from the illusion of the mysterious man that day, Lin Chenchu ​​deciphered in a panic what kind of lump that "gray general's beard" was - it was an anagram played by an elementary school student, Mihua, can you swallow the water in your mouth? talking!

The answer to the anagram is actually "the parachutist has no son", which refers to the parachutist Li Guang. Since he has no son, a "zi" is removed, and the combination of "wood" and "guang" is a "bed". The good thing that he said to pass on to Lin Chenchu ​​was under his bed, and such a simple thing made Mi Hua go through such a long circle before he said it. If Zhong Pan's dull taste is said, he was probably taught by Mi Hua, an old bachelor. of.

Hence the opening scene.

Lin Chenchu ​​fumbled vigorously, the light in Mihua's room was very low, he was under the bed when his hand touched about three inches from the foot of the bed, suddenly, he touched something cool.It appeared to be a piece of paper that had become very damp.

"This...couldn't it be that he crawled out from under Mihua's poorly hygienic bed while praying that the paper would not be the toilet paper that the nerd had treasured for thousands of years.

Lin Chenchu ​​looked at the piece of paper expectantly, and his face froze. It was really a very ordinary piece of toilet paper.

"It's really toilet paper!"

As he got angry, his body temperature suddenly rose. He didn't know what mechanism he had touched. The toilet paper fell to the ground and burst into flames with a "bang".

I don't know what he did to Mihua's Fengming Residence. After touching the burning toilet paper, the seemingly normal floor tiles also started to burn!The fire spread quickly and spread throughout the house in the blink of an eye.

He stood there in a daze, and the sudden fire caught him by surprise.Lin Chenchu ​​didn't understand at all whether he should add a fire to the situation to make him happy, or he should yell "It's out of water" and run away.But anyway, the fire couldn't hurt him, so the two guys simply stood there dumbfounded.

Just when he was wondering if he should leave the room, he suddenly found that a layer of white ash had been burned on the ground.

The distribution of the white ash is uneven, some are thick and some are thin, and they are extraordinarily delicate. It seems to form a picture, but some are not so clear.Just as he was fascinated by watching, suddenly there was a "snap", and the rope used to fix the curtain on the bed was blown for some reason, and the curtain lost its restraint and hung down flutteringly.

He quickly looked up, but saw that the curtain was empty and there was nothing.

"It shouldn't be. Mihua asked me to look for things under his bed. It's impossible not to give me any hints."

Suddenly remembered something, Lin Chenchu ​​had a thought, and quickly looked over with his spiritual sense, and as expected, he saw the words written by Mi Hua with his spiritual sense on the curtain:

"Hahaha, kid Lin, you're scared, this may be the last prank I will leave in this world, don't you think it's a great honor to participate in it? Hahaha...

If you see this line of words, it means that you must have seen the toilet paper I threw under the bed. Except for you who guessed the riddle, no one in the entire Tianmen sect would deliberately crawl under my manly smelling bed, nor would Someone threw the paper to the ground angrily.

Even if a child who was so idle crawled under my bed, picked up the paper I left behind, and then got lucky and dropped the paper on the ground, no one in the entire Tianmen sect would Standing in the fire unscathed like you and Zhong Panji, so the only ones who can hold on to the rope that binds the curtains are the two of you.

But Zhong Panji, a thief, will never stand here stupidly waiting for the fire to burn out. With his cleverness, he will definitely run outside the house and wait for the fire to burn out before coming back to watch, so you are the only one who can watch it. to this line.Hehehehe..."

Lin Chen's blue veins throbbed with anger, hehe, your sister!

At this time, the fire had already reached the curtain, and he didn't have time to distract himself, so he quickly browsed:

"I coated the floor tiles with a colorless and odorless chemical, but the toilet paper, which will burn when it encounters low temperature, will burn together, and then chemically react with the air, and finally turn into white ash of different thicknesses. .Don’t ask me where I got this kind of thing, such a naive question, I won’t answer you.”

Who would ask such a thing... Lin Chenchu ​​felt ashamed.

"When the fire is halfway through, the picture shown by the white ash is the clearest. You need to quickly write down the appearance of the pattern, because this is a map. I didn't come to see what was hidden on the way. This The picture was given to me by someone who seemed to be a bit sloppy before I ascended. Finally, I wish you a happy treasure hunt. If you have a chance in the future, maybe you can see you again, and there will be a period of time.

ps: Hehehe... I can't help but add a ps as soon as I write a letter...

——Technical house rice flower must write"

Lin Chenchu ​​was unusually calm, he was really calm, he silently walked past the blazing flames, ruthlessly tore down the curtain that was completely burned with holes, tore it to pieces without saying a word, and then led out Burning the sun with real fire, the last bit of dregs that left Mihua, the scourge, in the world were also incinerated into ashes...

"Don't see you again." He said expressionlessly.

The map made of white ash should be the mountainside of Luoheng Peak, and it looks like it should be not far from the place where the disciples live.

He took note of the location, absorbed the spiritual power of the fire in the room and extinguished it, then used a wind talisman, and left here as if escaping. The white ash in it.

……

In an unremarkable small forest in Luoheng Peak, the air seemed to have stagnated. In the middle of the forest sat two teenagers in black and white clothes, sitting around a chessboard.

Zhong Panji's eyes were full of unwillingness, and the sweat on his body had wet his collar before he knew it.He trembled and dropped the last one, Wu Xingya smiled triumphantly, and casually twisted one, with a calm expression on his face that an expert seemed humble but was actually pretending to be a kid.Lao Gao raised his hand, only to hear a "pop", and a beam of light that soared to the sky seemed to flash on the chessboard:

"Heaven and Earth Datong!"

As soon as Wu Xingshi finished speaking, the chess pieces in Zhong Panji's hand fell to the ground involuntarily. He looked at the chess game tremblingly, and his face became extremely pale. He watched Wu Xingya take down his chess pieces one by one. , he lowered his hands helplessly.

The latter tried hard to hide the smugness that was about to flow out of his nostrils, and said in a calm tone: "You lost."

"Senior Brother Wu is a good player. This game of chess has convinced me." Zhong Panji seemed to be buried in the ground, and he said in a muffled voice, the disappointment that could not be concealed in his voice.

Wu Xiaoqiang smiled proudly: "Hahaha... That's natural. Only those who have the world in mind can have this square inch of battlefield in mind. Zhong Panji, you still have something to learn."

Zhong Panji said guiltily: "Panji didn't know that Senior Brother Wu is such a person with the world in mind, and he offended him so much earlier, I hope Senior Brother will forgive me."

"Haha, don't worry, you're still a kid..." Wu Xingya waved his hand nonchalantly: "Don't worry, you'll be my younger brother from now on. If you have a piece of my brother's cake, he won't make you hungry." .”

Zhong Panji nodded gratefully: "Senior brother Wu, I will pay a big price for going to Xuanzimen this time." He looked at Si Si mysteriously, and seeing no one, he said to Wu Xingya: "I will hand you One of the treasures in the book was given to the head of the sect, so he let me come to Xuanzimen. Thanks to you and Brother Zhao for taking care of me these few days, I will not be isolated. But this time the chief battle I am I can’t participate anyway.”

Wu Xingya snickered in his heart, secretly thinking that I revealed your treasure to the head, it is really a stupid thing.He said calmly: "Is there such a thing? Are you a fool? If you have a treasure and don't keep it for yourself, how can you give it to the head?"

Zhong Panji hurriedly motioned him not to say such things, lest the walls have ears.A trace of gratitude flashed in his eyes, and he said immediately: "Thank you for your concern, senior brother. Pan Ji can't help himself. Not everyone in the sect is as chivalrous as senior brother."

Wu Xingya smiled secretly: You idiot, you were really sold, and you counted the money back to grandpa.He nodded, indicating that he, who is extremely smart, already knew what was going on. He pretended to be sympathetic and comforted him: "Junior Brother Zhong, don't be sad, luck is like a disaster. You are destined to have this difficulty, it can't be justified." It’s raining and it’s sunny.”

When Zhong Panji heard what he said, his eyes widened, and his face was full of exclamation: "Blessings come in the face of misfortune... To be able to say such a thing, the open-mindedness of senior brother is really admirable by Panji! In the future, this comprehension The world is really going to become your world! Don't forget me then."

What Wu Xingya said was very useful. At this time, he pretended to be reserved and humble, but he was helpless because the city was limited, and he was already overjoyed: "Why, don't talk nonsense...haha..."

"Why would I talk nonsense? I happen to have something in my hand, and I guess it won't be of much use if I keep it in my hand. It's better to give it to you, brother. If you become prosperous in the future, I hope you can take care of me."

Wu Xingshi's eyes lit up when he heard the words, and he was overjoyed: This must be the kind of ignorant fool who mistook good things for the protagonist, hahaha, it really is non-toxic and not a husband, and a small amount is not a gentleman!This world will be mine from now on, hahaha...

He couldn't hide his joy, and asked, "I don't know what it is?"

Zhong Panji took out a piece of paper from his arms, handed it to him, and said: "I found this from the treasure given to the head of the sect. It seems that I can't practice the spells written on it. I thought to myself , instead of keeping such a good thing in your hands, it is better to find a master who is more able to control it."

Wu Xingshi was too lazy to decline, even without seriously considering Zhong Panji's words, he snatched it over and looked at it with bright eyes. It was actually an extremely exquisite skill. If it is practiced well, it can Absorbing a heaven-defying move that exceeds twice the capacity of the body's own spiritual power in a very short period of time!

It may be a bit abstract to say so, for example, if this move is used in actual combat, absorbing more than twice your own spiritual power in a short period of time is equal to the possibility of using more spells, or leapfrogging to launch a killer move, using It is definitely the best choice to make hole cards and sneak attacks!

Wu Xingya was ecstatic, put the Fajue into his arms, and looked back at Zhong Panji: "Do you know the value of this thing?"

Zhong Panji shook his head: "I can only guess that this method is very precious, but no matter how hard I practice, I can't succeed. Maybe this is a good bird choosing a tree to live in."

Wu Xiaoqiang was about to say something when he heard footsteps behind him.

"Zhong Panji, what are you doing here?" A melodious and brisk voice sounded not far from the two of them.

Zhong Panji looked back, only to see He Fengxin standing not far from the two of them and looking at him with a sweet smile. She was wearing a white skirt, which female disciples used to wear, and a pair of small white shoes with some green bamboo Extra bright.

Sister Xinxin is out?He was overjoyed, and was about to ask He Fengxin how the retreat was, when Wu Xingya suddenly walked over and put his hand on He Fengxin's shoulder carelessly: "Sister, why did you get out of the retreat? Don't tell me, I'm fine." I'm going to pick you up."

He Fengxin was in her twenties and eighth year, with slender shoulders and neck, red lips and white teeth. She was a good-looking age no matter how she looked. Wu Xingya's eyes, which were stalking the harem girl, had naturally been on her for a long time.

Zhong Panji looked at Wu Xingya's hands hooked on He Fengxin's shoulders, blinked no matter what he looked at, wishing to cut off his hoof with a single sword, but before he could make a move, He Fengxin impatiently cut his hoof Pulling his hand off his shoulder: "What are you telling me? I still have things to do, don't bother me. Zhong Panji, I'm leaving!"

Seeing this, Wu Xingya quickly entangled him and left together.

A gust of cool wind rustled the leaves, and Zhong Panji kept his head down. I am afraid that at this moment, except himself, no one knows what he is thinking. He took out the last thick leaf from his arms, and sneered. Back in my arms.

The Jue given to Wu Xingya was not found from that hairpin at all, but one of the many Jue that Mihua had asked him to recite, but it is no problem for anyone to practice this Jue, but Wu Xingya To practice is to seek death!

He put on his trademark sunny smile again, and muttered to himself: "It's already noon, Xiaochen should not have eaten yet, I'd better go to the foot of Luoqiu Peak to find a female disciple who cooks to write about food." Come here..."

So where is Lin Chenchu ​​at this time?

"Damn Mi Hua, what kind of place is this?" Lin Chenchu ​​covered his nose and stood in a stinking swamp, cursing Mi Hua while looking around.

If it wasn't for that picture of bowing his head, Lin Chenchu ​​would not have known that Luoheng Peak would have such a dirty swamp.Above the swamp is a cliff that looks extremely wet. There is a cave on the top of the cliff. From time to time, some suspicious liquid drips from the cave into the swamp, making a big mud flower, and then slowly turning back to the swamp. The original appearance, and then another drop of water dripped down.

The picture only indicated that the thing to be given to him was in the cave, but it didn't explain what it was at all, but it seemed that the most likely place to hide things in this place was the cave.

Lin Chenchu's originally gentle and calm expression suddenly became a little ugly, the corner of his mouth twitched, and he swallowed a mouthful of saliva: "What is hidden in this kind of place..."

☆, 80 Irresponsible Extras One Hundred Questions about Couples' Sexuality (Mistakes)——Lin Cheng vs. Ji Qingluo

One Hundred Questions about Relationship Between Couples (Fog): Ji Qingluo vs Lin Cheng Chapter

1. May I have your name?

Xiaoshuo:: Name? (pick nose)

Ji Qingluo:: Ji Qingluo. (blue veins)

Forest City:: Forest City. (cover your eyes, I don't know this person...)

2. What is your age?

Xiaoshuo: How old are you? (picking feet)

Ji Qingluo: ...It is not convenient to disclose,

Lin Cheng: 28.

Xiao Shuo: Ya Lincheng, you shameless bastard, you're already old, yet you're still pretending to be young!Seek truth from facts and understand!

Lin Cheng: Don't think I don't know what you want to do, isn't this wretched look just to hurry to the back?hurry up……

Xiaoshuo: Hey, hey hey... (being seen through, scratching his head) Then just ask a question~

51 May I ask whether you are the attacker or the recipient?

Ji Qingluo: I am Gong. (Aiming at Lincheng)

Lin Cheng: ...I am a shou. (receives glances, shrinks neck)

Xiaoshuo: This is the queen!like one~

52 Why did you make such a decision?

Ji Qingluo: (laughs) He loves me.

Lin Cheng: (same laugh) I love you.

Xiaoshuo: Me~ Oh, don’t say it in front of the readers, I’m sorry~ (Shaking hands like a bustard)

Ji Qingluo & Lin Cheng: Get lost!

53 Are you satisfied with the current situation?

Xiaoshuo: Suspected of spoiling the drama~banned~

54 Where is the first h?

Lin Cheng: When we got married~

Ji Qingluo: I forgot if you didn't tell me, I remember that day you thought you could get pregnant with just a kiss...

Lin Cheng: (Large embarrassment) Don’t talk about the daughter-in-law...

55 How did you feel at that time?

Ji Qingluo: Hahahaha~ Oh my god~ It’s so funny~~

Lin Cheng: Embarrassed... Huge... Super embarrassing...

56 What did the other party look like at that time?

Ji Qingluo: baby face~ super cute~

Lin Cheng: A 15o-year-old baby face... (with blood on his face)

57 What is your first word in the morning of the first night?

Xiao Shuo: Ahhh!Let me guess~~ What Fairy Qingluo must have said is: Ahhh!Let's see if the red envelope given by Master has arrived~

Ji Qingluo:! ?

Lin Cheng: ...It's the truth...

58 times per week h?

Lin Cheng: Woooooo... (Old man burst into tears) I haven't had sex for 100 years...

Xiao Shuo: How pitiful, touch...

Lin Cheng: (hugging Ji Qingluo, rubbing)...

·

59 Under ideal circumstances, how many times a week?

Lin Cheng: One hundred times!I want to earn back everything I saved~

Ji Qingluo: (tears off Lin Cheng who is sticking to her body) ...shame...

6o Then, what kind of h is it?

Ji Qingluo: The answer is over, (Look at Xiaoshuo threateningly)

Xiaoshuo: Well, let’s go to the next question...

Lin Cheng: (muttering) ... really spineless ...

61 Your most sensitive place?

Ji Qingluo: ...well, palms, waist, neck...

Lin Cheng: Well, there are three points in total.

Xiaoshuo: Three o'clock! ?Hehehe...

62 What is the most sensitive part of the other party?

Ji Qingluo: I forgot...

Lin Cheng: Hey, hey... Wife, let me let you know again~

Xiao Shuo: Good! !I record here~~

Ji Qingluo: (stares)

Lin Cheng: (stares)

Xiaoshuo: (cold fury) Cough cough... the next question...

63 Use one sentence to describe the other party at h?

Ji Qingluo: Be careful.

Lin Cheng: ...Queen.

Xiaoshuo: Dude~ Do you really mind my watching?

Lin Cheng: Get out!

64 Frankly speaking, do you like h?

Lin Cheng: I like it~!I like to have sex with my daughter-in-law~ I have never considered other things.

Ji Qingluo: Think about it now... (Hide a knife in a smile)

Xiao Shuo: Murderous!

Lin Cheng: (scared) I'm done thinking about it! It doesn't matter what h!

Ji Qingluo: (satisfied laughing) Hmm ~ next question.

65 In general, where is h located?

Lin Cheng: In the room... at most it is the pool.

Xiaoshuo: (saliva) ... I also arrange one for the protagonist~

66 h places you want to try?

Lin Cheng: Where are they all?I never tried any tricks.

Xiaoshuo: (photographing)

Ji Qingluo: What are you doing?

Xiao Shuo: (eyes shine) This is the giant panda among men, okay?Be sure to take pictures as souvenirs, such innocent obscenity is rare.

Lin Cheng: ...For the time being, I thought they were praising me...

Ji Qingluo: I really want to try leather whips, candles, chastity/fucking/belts, etc...

Lincheng: QQ

67 Is the shower before h or after h?

Ji Qingluo: Both.

Is there any agreement at 68h?

Lin Cheng: (embarrassed) ... Cough cough.

Ji Qingluo: (satisfied) Listen to me for everything

69 Have you ever had sex with someone other than your lover?

Ji Qingluo: No.Practice is more important.

Lin Cheng: Cultivation is also important, I only have Sister Qing Luo in my heart.

Xiao Shuo: Big sister~~~ so cute~~~

7o Do you agree or disagree with the idea of ​​"if you can't get your heart, you should at least get your **"?

Lin Cheng: It doesn't matter.

Ji Qingluo: It's so cute if you put it on someone else~ But if Zhong Panji dares to treat my son like this, I will stew you as the author!

Xiao Shuo: Ahem, next question.

71 What would you do if the other party was raped/raped by thugs?

Ji Qingluo: No one can rape him.

Lin Cheng: Condolences to the martyrs who dared to rape/rape her... You are not blind, but your heart is dead.

Xiaoshuo: cough cough.

72 Do you feel embarrassed before h?or later?

Ji Qingluo: ...Yes.

Lin Cheng: ...Yes.

73 If a good friend said to you "I'm lonely, so only tonight, please..." and asked for h, would you?

Lin Cheng: All my friends are men... cut him off.

Ji Qingluo: Kill him.

74 Do you think you are good at h?

Ji Qingluo: Not good at it.

Lin Cheng: The technology needs to be strengthened.

75 What about the other party?

Ji Qingluo: It's okay, there is no need.

Lin Cheng: (Aiming at the whip) No need!Really no need!

76 What do you want the other party to say at h?

Ji Qingluo: (smirking) Sister...

Lin Cheng: (Sorry) Xiaocheng, I love you.

Ji Qingluo: (stares) Did I say that?

Lin Cheng: (spreading hands) So I hope you can tell.

77 Which kind of expression do you like the other person when h?

Lin Cheng: Shy.

Ji Qingluo: Shy.

Xiaoshuo: How can two shy people hey/whoosh... Sure enough, the title should be changed to "I hope each other".

78 Do you think it is okay to have sex with someone other than your lover?

Ji Qingluo: No.

Lin Cheng: No.

Xiao Shuo: Good boy~

79 Are you interested in □?

Lin Cheng: (Confused) Love to death?

Ji Qingluo: (Little eyes are bright) Yes!

Lin Cheng: This feeling...is not good...

8o If the other party suddenly stopped asking for your body, would you?

Ji Qingluo: It doesn't matter.

Lin Cheng: I didn't ask...

Xiao Shuo: Sure enough, he is a pure-hearted cultivator, immortal, and cultivator.

81 What do you think of rape?

Lin Cheng: There is a reason for everything... I have no idea.However, I suggest cutting off the small ** of the perpetrator/violent.

Ji Qingluo: Same as above.

Xiao Shuo: Uh...hehe...it really is a pure-hearted cultivator.

What is the more painful thing in 82h?

Lin Cheng: She suddenly said no... (crying bitterly)

Ji Qingluo: Hehehe...

83 In the h so far, which place makes you most excited and anxious?

Ji Qingluo: The time when we got married.

Lin Cheng: ... Same as above.

84 Have you ever been seduced by the recipient?

Ji Qingluo: Yes.

Lin Cheng: ...I have been persistent and never changed...

85 What was the attacking side's expression at that time?

Ji Qingluo: Well, come on~

Lin Cheng: Hmm~~ So happy! !

86. Has the attacking side ever acted □?

Ji Qingluo: I don't even bother to do this...

Lin Cheng: Actually, what I wish for...

87 What was the recipient's reaction at that time?

Xiaoshuo: Next question.

88 For you, what is your ideal "as an h object"?

Lin Cheng & Ji Qingluo: Next question!

89 Does the current partner meet your ideal?

Lin Cheng: Absolutely! !

Ji Qingluo: It barely fits...

Lin Cheng: Huh... so happy~

Did 9o use small props in h?

Ji Qingluo: (evil smile) I would rather use...

Lin Cheng: In order to be able to have sex with you, I will go all out!

91 When did it happen to you for the first time?

Ji Qingluo & Lin Cheng: Great wedding.

92 Was the object at that time the current lover?

Ji Qingluo & Lin Cheng: Yes.

93 Where is your favorite place to be kissed?

Ji Qingluo: Mouth.

Lin Cheng: Yes.

Xiaoshuo: Suddenly it feels so romantic...

Lin Cheng: ... (I would say, do I want to be kissed by Xiao Lincheng more? Do I?)

94 Where do you like to kiss each other most?

Xiao Shuo: I know I know—kiss! !

What is the most pleasing thing for the other party at 95 hours?

Ji Qingluo: Confession.

Lin Cheng: Call her "sister".

Xiaoshuo: Hohoho...Qingluo sister is indeed a combination of fresh and heavy taste...

What will you think at 96h?

Ji Qingluo: I don't think about anything.

Lin Cheng: I can't think of anything, I just want to cherish this little time.

97 hours per night?

Ji Qingluo: Look at my mood...

Lin Cheng: (tears streaming down his face)

At 98 hours, do you take off your clothes yourself, or does the other party help you take them off?

Ji Qingluo: Lin Cheng.

Lin Cheng: Me.

What is 99 to you?

Ji Qingluo: A way to express love occasionally.

Lin Cheng: A way to release love occasionally.

1oo please say something to your lover

Lin Cheng: Daughter-in-law, is it time to braise this fat mouse?

Ji Qingluo: Uh huh~

Xiaoshuo: Yay! !Ya butterfly! !I don't want it! !Help……

Lin Cheng: (busy catching mice) Daughter-in-law, I love you.

Ji Qingluo: (busy catching mice) Me too...

So this chapter of one hundred questions about couples (actually only 51 questions) ended happily in someone's lonely and bitter wolf howl...

☆, 81 weirdos