not the white lotus

Ye Xuning forced himself not to think wildly, and concentrated on drawing for an hour, but he still couldn't find the feeling. Finally, he took a deep breath, put down the palette, got up and lay down on the resting bench beside him, he needed to be quiet , steady mind.

Closing his eyes, Yan Xuzhi's expressionless face was clearly reflected in his mind.

Ye Xuning showed a faint wry smile. It turned out that he was not as relaxed as he imagined, thinking that he would never meet them again in this life, but when he really faced them, he couldn't calm down.

There is a saying in ancient times, "Healers cannot heal themselves, and those who change cannot predict themselves." The genius doctor saved all the people in the world, but he could not save himself. , "The authorities are obsessed, and the bystanders are clear" are all extravagant hopes.

Ye Xuning could always comfort Tang Tang, Jiang Miaomiao, and everyone around her, but she couldn't comfort herself.

I still remember when I was in France, a girl in my class with whom he could get along well told him about the troubles hidden in my heart. The girl also had a younger brother, but the birth of the younger brother was not expected, and her parents had an unexpected pregnancy , I wanted to get rid of it, but was opposed by the elders, so it was born.

The girl was favored by her parents, but her younger brother was neglected. She felt that she owed her younger brother, so she tried her best to treat her younger brother well. At first, her younger brother didn't appreciate it, and she still curled up in her own world. It didn't get better until a long time later.

Ye Xuning kept silent at that time, only heard the girl smile and tell him that because my brother always thought that he was not expected to be born, once he did something wrong and got criticized by his parents, his negative emotions would be doubled , he will feel "I am really redundant, I should not have been born".

Inexplicably remembering this incident, Ye Xuning opened his eyes and looked at the mottled tree shadows. If he could still be criticized for doing something wrong, does that mean he still has status in his parents' hearts?He criticizes because he cares, but he can't even get criticism. As for praise, it's a luxury.

He is the one who was really not expected to be born. If it wasn't for the repeated persuasion of the older generation, he would have been strangled in the stomach, so he didn't get the slightest attention from childhood to adulthood. He lived for 20 years and saw him all year round. The number of visits to parents can be counted on the fingers.

When I was young, I still wanted to be praised by my parents. I finally saw my parents, and I couldn’t wait to tell my parents the news of the award-winning work. But my parents only had my brother in their eyes. When I sat down, I asked my brother everything and let him swallow the words again. go back.

Ye Xuning felt that his parents would only see him if he was better. As a result, he was praised by all the teachers and students in the school, but he still couldn't see his parents. In vain, not letting nature take its course.

After going to university, he left that empty home and moved out to live alone. Except for the older generation who would visit him, Yan Xuzhi was the only one who came to watch him paint in his free time. The communication between the two was pitiful. As for Parents, see each other less often.

The moment she woke up from rebirth, Ye Xuning experienced family affection for the first time when she saw Ye's father and mother who were weeping with joy.

It turns out that family love is like this, you can give everything, just want the family to be safe and sound, but he is a pair of strange parents, but he is reluctant to tell them the cruel truth, and he can't bear to see such a pair of parents who love their children mourn and despair.

He is the extra person in the family, so Ye Xuning repeatedly reminded himself that even if he reunited with his family one day, even if he didn't get a trace of their sorrow, he could still comfort himself like this. Wouldn't it be better to have the extra people gone?

Ye Xuning's heart was bitter, and she couldn't wait to get the answer, but she didn't dare to face it, she could only escape, afraid that she wouldn't see a trace of regret and pain in their eyes, even though she knew that they had feelings for him as a child. However, he still had hope in his heart.

In the haze, there was a gentle touch on the face, like a feather brushing the corners of the eyes, gentle and loving, Ye Xuning opened his eyes lightly, his vision was extremely blurred, blinked, a familiar outline was reflected, and he smiled slightly. Dazed, he quickly sat up from the bench.

He raised his hand and rubbed his eyes, only to find that the corners of his eyes were wet. Ye Xuning lowered his head silently, noticing that the person beside him stood up, and then a glass of water was handed to him, he raised his hand to take a sip from the teacup, and suppressed his heart. The bitter, ups and downs of emotion have stabilized.

"Dream?" Xing Shengyu leaned on the back of the chair and asked casually. His eyes were fixed on the indifferent Ye Xuning, and he reached out and patted his head and asked, "Did you dream about something unhappy? How could you cry like that?" It's cute as a child."

Ye Xuning was a little annoyed, so she raised her eyes and glared at Xing Shengyu who was gloating, but she had to thank Xing Shengyu, some embarrassing things seemed cramped instead of hiding, so it was better to say it as a joke, and the embarrassing atmosphere disappeared immediately .

"Come and talk to brother Shengyu, brother Shengyu will give you advice and advice." Xing Shengyu smiled and put his arm around Ye Xuning's shoulder, and scratched Ye Xuning's chin with his right index finger, "The skin is so good, Tang Tang is envious and jealous."

Ye Xuning tried his best not to put the water glass on Xing Shengyu's head, took a picture and posted it on Weibo, this guy put on a rogue tone, which made people angry, Xie Yelin was right in scolding, old rogue I have no seriousness all day long, I only know how to tease them.

Xing Shengyu put it away as soon as he saw it, and put away his unruly fingers: "If you don't want to say it, how about taking you somewhere?"

Ye Xuning raised his head and asked suspiciously: "Where? Didn't you say you want to draw?"

"No hurry, let's go." Xing Shengyu took the water glass in Ye Xuning's hand, put it on the stone table, pulled Ye Xuning up from the bench, walked straight outside, stopped at the iron gate, turned around and asked, "Would you like to tell your uncle and aunt?"

Seeing Ye Xuning's bewilderment, Xing Shengyu held his hand tightly and said with a smile: "I saw you sleeping when I first came here, and I didn't want to wake you up, so I asked my uncle and aunt to open the door for me. Uncles and aunts probably went to take their lunch break too, forget it, don't disturb them."

Ye Xuning nodded. If Father Ye and Mother Ye couldn't see him when they woke up, they could guess that he and Xing Shengyu had gone out. He really wasn't suitable for painting today, and he couldn't get into the mood at all. Why not go out with Xing Shengyu for a walk, Although this guy is not serious, he pays a lot of attention.

Xing Shengyu drove him all the way to the suburbs. Ye Xuning turned his head and looked at the unfamiliar environment outside the car window. It was a bit strange. He had never been out of the house since he woke up. The only things he was familiar with were the downtown area and the vicinity of the school. He turned his head and asked : "Where are you going?"

"Ask now? Are you afraid that I will sell you?"

"..." Ye Xuning was at a loss for words.

"It'll be there soon." Xing Shengyu chuckled, seeing Ye Xuning's smile out of the corner of his eye, and heaved a sigh of relief.

He had never really bothered so much about a person, but he couldn't see that this guy's usually smiling face suddenly became sad, and he cried when he fell asleep, but it was more difficult for Ye Xuning to speak than to make him laugh, Xing Sheng Yu didn't force him, just took him away.

Xing Shengyu really wanted to look up to the sky and sigh. After competing with Yan Xuzhi for so many years, this time I am afraid that he will face the most difficult competition. If Yan Xuzhi knows that he is abducting his younger brother, this brother-in-law will not overthrow his genius. , and then drew his gun and shot at him.

The car drove for a while and stopped at the beach. Xing Shengyu turned his head to stare at the surprised Ye Xuning, shook his head with a smile, unfastened his seat belt, opened the car door and got out of the car. He walked a few steps forward, facing the cool With the salty sea breeze, you feel relaxed and happy.

Turning his head to look at Ye Xuning who was following, Xing Shengyu bent down and picked up a small stone, and threw it into the sea forcefully: "I have read this sentence before, if you are in a bad mood, come to the beach for a walk, listen to the sound of the waves, The impetuous mood will calm down."

Ye Xuning glanced at the serious Xing Shengyu, the smile on the corner of his mouth gradually widened, looked around, walked towards a rock, sat facing the sea, the sea breeze was blowing on his face, and the sound of waves was in his ears, Xing Shengyu was really fascinated by it. To be fair, he was in a very good mood at the moment.

Suddenly remembered what he said jokingly when he first met Xing Shengyu, Xing Shengyu is a considerate and romantic person, if Xing Shengyu really pursued someone, he said at that time that probably no one could refuse Xing Shengyu, After such a long time, he still firmly believed in this sentence.

"How is it? Are you in a better mood?" Xing Shengyu leaned over and sat next to him, his feet still on the beach, his hands crossed over his chest, looking very comfortable. When I cut people, I will come here alone."

"Alone?" Ye Xuning was surprised.

Xing Shengyu turned his head to look at Ye Xuning's eyes, and smiled meaningfully: "This is the first time I've come here with someone else."

Ye Xuning was slightly agitated in his heart, and he looked away embarrassedly, as if something was about to come out, he immediately suppressed it, focused his attention on the endless sea level, and pretended to be relaxed and said: "I am deeply honored, the great god of the Brahma world."

Xing Shengyu on one side smiled, noncommittal, watching the sea level with him.

The atmosphere is very quiet, revealing a touch of warmth, only the sound of waves beating against the rocks, which makes people feel calm.

After a long time, Ye Xuning slowly opened his mouth and said: "I have lived in China for a few months. I didn't know there was a sea here. I thought there were only mountains, but the mountains and the sea are very beautiful. I will go around again when I have a chance. Haven't climbed enough mountains."

Xing Shengyu was taken aback, looking at Ye Xuning who was smiling slightly in surprise, and it took him a while to come to his senses, did Ye Xuning choose to confess to him?Although he had been expecting Ye Xuning to take the initiative to say something to him, when he really confessed, he didn't know how to appease him.

"Well, if you like, we can find a weekend, call Tang Tang and Ye Lin, and go climbing together. If we are in this city, two weekends are enough." After a moment of silence, Xing Shengyu pretended to be relaxed and said, No point was made, and no question was asked.

Ye Xuning turned to stare into Xing Shengyu's eyes.

Seeing embarrassment, Xing Shengyu gave a light "cough": "What's wrong? Didn't you say you didn't climb enough mountains?"

Ye Xuning chuckled a few times: "Well, I thought I could climb to the top and overlook the entire bustling city, but I didn't expect to be thrown down by God when I climbed halfway. He just didn't let me climb to the top. I'll climb next time , I will definitely climb the whole mountain.”

Xing Shengyu gently wrapped his arms around his shoulders: "Well, I will accompany you to climb the entire mountain."

Ye Xuning stared at Xing Shengyu, and Xing Shengyu just showed a gentle smile, without suspicion or persecution, with deep connivance and comfort in his eyes, and suddenly his heart felt warm, and this warmth flowed through his whole body with his blood: "Thanks."

Xing Shengyu patted his head and let him lean on his shoulder. After that, the two of them didn't speak, and looked at the sea quietly.

Ye Xuning is willing to admit his identity to him, and he has taken a big enough step, he is not in a hurry, wait slowly, one day he will know everything he wants to know, but there is one thing that he cares about, what is Ye Xuning's love for Yan Xu? What do you think?