Ha ha

Xu Chenchuan understood.He just wanted to pretend that he didn't understand, but the other party asked without any leeway: "What happened to you just now?"

The chirping of cicadas outside the window has disappeared for some time.When he realized it, only his own breathing was left in the room.Xu Chenchuan didn't remember how long he was in a daze, until the sound of footsteps gradually approaching, he suddenly woke up with a jolt.

"Chenchuan, can I come in?" Shu Yingli asked in a low voice outside the door.

Xu Chenchuan closed the chat window, went to open the door: "What's wrong, Mom?"

"It's nothing, I just want to tell you to pay attention to rest."

"Well, I'll go to bed now, you should go to bed earlier too."

Shu Yingli smiled: "Okay."

"Good night." Xu Chenchuan reached out to close the door.

"Chenchuan—"

Shu Yingli raised her hand, as if she wanted to touch Xu Chenchuan's head, but stopped halfway.With the current height difference between the two, this action is too awkward to do.

"Last time I saw you, it seemed you weren't so tall." She laughed at herself with a sad smile.

"We have been too far away from your life, and we have no way of knowing what happened to you now." She looked at him tenderly and carefully, "If you want to talk to me, Mom is willing to listen anytime, you know ?”

Xu Chenchuan felt sore in his heart, but he only uttered one word when he opened his mouth: "Okay."

There are some things that he originally planned to confess to his parents - just before Chen Huan escaped.

After Shu Yingli left, the room returned to silence.The chat record still stays on Zhihe's voice, and the other party didn't make a sound after asking, maybe they are still waiting for an answer, or maybe they have lost patience.The blank input box was like a deadpan face, announcing Xu Chenchuan's defeat and surrender.

Xu Chenchuan suddenly moved closer to the microphone.

Bai Qi had already thrown the phone aside, but unexpectedly it vibrated again.Underneath the already aborted dialogue, a new voice appeared.

"are you still there?"

Bai Qi laughed: "Why, something else happened?"

In fact, he was quite surprised. He thought that the person who had just poked him and ran away from a distance, somehow came back by himself.

Xu Chenchuan also laughed, showing some open-mindedness: "Yes, I was told the reason for being dumped just now."

Bai Qixu's finger on the recording button paused.

Xu Chenchuan was ready to be laughed at, but the other party just asked calmly: "Really, why?"

"Uh, family or something..." Xu Chenchuan shrugged, regardless of whether the other party could see it or not, "Actually, I can't blame him, everyone has their own difficulties. It's just that I have some regrets."

This time Zhihe was silent for a longer time, Xu Chenchuan almost thought that he was cold again.When he finally sent a response, he sneered: "Family? Difficulties? There are only two reasons for people in this world to be dumped. Either the other party doesn't like you enough, or the other party is dead. The rest are not reasons. Call it an excuse."

Xu Chenchuan froze.

After a long time, he smiled with difficulty: "But how can people in the world be so honest. Even if it's an excuse, if it makes both parties feel better, it will be a consummation of merit."

A voice like warm boiling water came out of the phone, but Bai Qi felt a familiar coldness from the bottom of his feet.As if being swallowed by the black mud bit by bit, it overflowed the limp lower body, gradually crossed the chest, neck, nose, until it submerged the top of the head.He took a deep breath like he was suffocating, and suddenly smiled: "You sound quite uncomplaining."

Xu Chenchuan continued to automatically ignore Zhihe's tone: "How can it be possible to have no complaints or regrets... I am not reconciled, but also angry. If the roles are reversed, what he did to me... I will not treat him at all Do it." He breathed a sigh of relief, "But so what, the most you can't ask for in the world is that people treat you well. Even if you torture yourself with negative emotions all day long, you still can't get what you don't get, what you lose I can’t get it back either.”

"If you can really regain your composure with those two sentences, you don't like her as much as you imagined."

"..."

This person's words are like a whip, insisting on blood and flesh, pulling people back to the original form where there is nowhere to escape.

But Xu Chenchuan has no grievances to avenge - the one who chose not to run away is himself.

"Maybe you are right." He said frankly, "It is always difficult to control the mind, but I will still try to do it. Maybe I still like myself more than him, so I want to Live happily."

In the suffocating air, that warm voice slid through the night, carrying some kind of strange pity. "What's more, although the final ending is like this, there are still many good things that happened in the process. For example, without him, I would not have thought of joining the subtitle group, and I would not have met you. No matter how bad it is Experiences will always leave some good memories. It is enough to think about those."

Bai Qi didn't reply.

After a while, Xu Chenchuan suddenly said "ah" in surprise: "Obviously I was talking to you, but in the end I seem to have convinced myself." He smiled, "I feel much better now, thank you for your company." I've been talking so late. Go to bed early, good night."

The phone screen brightened for a while, then slowly dimmed.

Bai Qi lay in the darkness with his eyes open.Good memories?

He turned his head, and the wheelchair parked beside the bed showed a strange silhouette, like a dilapidated and stranded solitary boat.