i must be in hell

In his hazy childhood memory, he vaguely remembered a vague face, which was the face of his childhood adopter.

It was an ordinary woman who was busy with her livelihood, and she was rarely at home since he could remember when he was a child.I often sit in the house all afternoon, only to hear the door lock open outside the house, and then the sound of a person's procrastinating and tired footsteps.At that time, he would always lift up his spirits and go up to welcome the adopters back home.

In their memory, they lived very poorly, seldom ate meat, and often had to move.Therefore, he has almost no chance to meet playmates of the same age, and always spends the whole day in the house.Of course, she wouldn't allow him to go out either.Every time he was forced to take him out, the adopter always wrapped him tightly, as if he was afraid of being seen by others.

When he was very young, he didn't understand why she did this.However, once, he accidentally heard the dispute between the adopter and the landlord.

"We can't let people like you live here, it will ruin my reputation!"

"We didn't do anything, I just brought my children to work here, I don't know what to do."

"That's different. The parents of the child you brought up did such an outrageous thing. I can't let you continue to live here. People will gossip about it."

"But he is just a child, what his parents do has nothing to do with him."

"It's all the same blood! Who knows if this kid will kill people and set fires in the future, anyway, you guys move out tomorrow, or I'll call the police!"

At the end of the conversation, he could only see the hunched and frail back of the adopter through the crack of the door, and her suppressed weeping after the landlord left.

From that time on, he began to understand that the reason why they had to live in hiding, and the reason why he couldn't go out to meet each other, was all on him.Because he is not a child of a good family, he has unclean blood on his body.

All this is my own fault.

The overheard conversation that day left a deep impression on the heart of the child under four years old.Since then, they have moved frequently, and the adopters still do small jobs to make ends meet. Once their identities are discovered, they will take the children and flee to the next place.During these processes, he heard people's discussions intermittently.

"This murderer's child will definitely not be a good person in the future."

"He's got the murderer's blood on him!"

"Why did he let him be born at that time, he should have an abortion."

"Murderers are not eligible to have children! Murderers' children are not eligible to live!"

In his thinking when he was young, he didn't understand the real meaning of the word "murderer", he only knew that it should not be a good name, and he had these unclean blood on his body.When he was kicked out of the rental house again and he hugged the adopter and shivered in the cold wind, he finally made up his mind.

He asked, "Are they always kicking us out because I'm a bad kid?"

The adopter just hugged him tightly without making a sound.

"In this case, then you leave me, so those people won't drive you out again." He hugged the only person who could warm him with his small hands, leaned on her, and said softly: "I won't give birth to you." You are angry, throw me into the orphanage."

How did she answer at that time?He can't remember much.The only thing I have an impression of is a pair of arms hugging myself tightly in the cold wind.In the long night, only two people, one big and one small, depended on each other.

The adopter did not choose to abandon him, and the two ran around for a few years after that.It was not until the autumn of a certain year that he ended this life of escape, the cause of which was the death of the adopter.

The cause of death was sudden death caused by continuous work in a high-load working environment without a heavy load.Since then, the only hand in the world that can warm him has also become cold.He seemed destined to be alone, but just when he was about to be sent to the orphanage, an unexpected person appeared in front of him.

"I have a lot of delicious food at home, do you want to go home with me?"

A man squatted in front of him, looking at the immature face of a young child.

"Then will you drive me out? Because I am the child of a murderer, and I may become a murderer in the future. Everyone is afraid of murderers. If you are with me, they will also drive you away."

"No." A big hand rubbed his head, and he heard a hearty laugh. "Uncle catches murderers, and uncle can also protect you. You don't have to worry that I will be driven away. Everyone needs uncle's protection, and uncle will not be driven away."

Sounds like it's awesome.

"Then can I catch murderers in the future and become someone like you?"

The man who spoke was taken aback for a moment, then laughed. "Yes! As long as you want, you can."

If you can become a person like Uncle, will no one be afraid of him in the future, will you no longer let important people be displaced because of you?

It wasn't until later that he realized how much pressure the adopter, his aunt, was under at that time to raise him, the child of a murderer.Since then, he has made up his mind.If possible, he wants to be someone who can protect others like his adoptive father.

He wants to protect his important people and never let them get hurt again, just like——

"Xu Shangyu, get up."

What a sound, it's so loud.

"If you don't get up within three seconds, you will be at your own peril. One, two..."

three!

Opening his eyes suddenly, Xu Shangyu saw Ning Xiao's heartless face at a glance.He still held a basin of cold water in his hand, with a smile on his lips.

"It's very timely." Putting down the water basin, Ning Xiao said with satisfaction, "There's no need to waste water resources."

Xu Shangyu rubbed his aching temple, sat up from the bed and looked at Ning Xiao.He glanced at the brain on the bedside table, and said helplessly, "It's six o'clock, why did you wake me up so early?"

"I have investigated some news about He Ye, and I need you to accompany me out." Ning Xiao said, "By the way, I haven't made breakfast yet. I have already put the ingredients in the kitchen, so please."

Not only to be a driver, but also a part-time cook.Xu Shangyu sighed slightly: "Won't you feel guilty if you use me like this?"

"will not."

"Then can I ask for some compensation?" Xu Shangyu tentatively asked: "At any rate, I have worked hard to serve you for so long."

Ning Xiao gave him a blank look. "Help you find your son, and you still have to ask me for a reward. Zhang Weiwei will be very sad to hear that, you unscrupulous adopter. In addition, last time I troubled Ji Yuqiu for the inspection, he came to urge the inspection fee yesterday. My salary hasn't arrived yet, so I ask you to borrow some advances first."

This is not a questioning tone at all, but a cut first and then play.Xu Shangyu looked at Ning Xiao who didn't regard himself as an outsider at all, and felt a wonderful feeling of relief and depression coexisting in his heart.What is gratifying is that Ning Xiao does not treat him as an outsider, and what is frustrating is that Ning Xiao has no intention of treating him as an insider.The most extreme thing is that since they lived together, Comrade Ning Xiao often ran around the apartment wearing only a pair of shorts, completely treating another same-sex person who had confessed to him as an invisible person.Unfortunately, Xu Shangyu couldn't do anything.

Seeing but not being able to eat, for a physiologically normal man, this must be such a torment.

"Hurry up and make breakfast."

After Ning Xiao told him what to do all morning, he was beaten up while wearing shorts and a vest.Xu Shangyu sat on the bed, staring at his exposed waist curve.She thought to herself, anyway, raping a man is not against the law, if Ning Xiao pushes himself like this again, don't blame him for being merciless, hehe.

Ning Xiao's shout came from outside the house. "Xu Shangyu, breakfast!"

"Hey, here we come."

Xu Shangyu let out a long sigh, brushed away all the thoughts in his mind, and resigned himself to making breakfast. The self 20 years ago must have never imagined that one day, even if the dream is realized.The so-called protection of important people is nothing more than treating him like a cow or a horse and cooking breakfast for him.The ideal is really full, but the reality is too skinny.

When eating breakfast, Ning Xiao was still holding a stack of documents in his hand.Since the failure of the last entrapment operation to let Heye escape again, Ning Xiao has started to go into a trance.He was basically looking up all kinds of information all day long, and he always took some inexplicable things for Ji Yuqiu to appraise.As for his job of writing novels, he put it aside.

Xu Shangyu knew that he was impatient, Zhang Weiwei was taken away by Heye right under their noses.As long as the child cannot be found, Ning Xiao will not feel at ease for a day.However, Ning Xiao's state is a little crazy, and Xu Shangyu, the child's serious guardian, thinks he needs to express his opinion.

"Ahem." He coughed twice, seeing Ning Xiao put down the book to read, he said, "Actually, about Weiwei..."

Beep beep, beep beep.

Just as the conversation started, the phone rang hastily.Xu Shangyu could only apologize, got up and went outside to answer the phone.

Ning Xiao swallowed a poached egg, drank half a bowl of soy milk, and ate two steamed buns by the way. When he looked up again, Xu Shangyu was still talking on the phone.He wondered in his heart, why did he talk for so long?If it is official business, it should be clear in a few words and handle the matter directly.So it means that this phone call is not an official business, but Xu Shangyu's private matter.

Private matter?

Ning Xiao looked at Xu Shangyu's frown on the balcony, quietly put down the bowl, and listened attentively.

"……Nowadays?"

"Okay, when?"

"I see, I'll be there on time."

"Thank you."

Listening to the content of the conversation, it seems that there are guests coming, and Xu Shangyu needs to go somewhere to meet them.But looking at his expression is very serious, it seems that he is not an ordinary guest.After answering the call, Xu Shangyu's mood seemed to change slightly, as if he had something on his mind.The topic that he was going to discuss with Ning Xiao had already been forgotten by him eight thousand miles away.

Ning Xiao didn't mind, but was very curious.Who is the person who can make Xu Shangyu show such an expression?

The two had an early dinner and went out together.Ning Xiao got into the co-pilot and glanced at him.

"Aren't you going out to pick someone up?"

"Not now." Xu Shangyu paused. "About this matter, Ning Xiao, I have to tell you first..."

Unfortunately, the phone rang again at this moment, interrupting their conversation again.But this time it wasn't a personal call, but the emergency ringtone of a mobile phone for business use.Upon hearing this voice, Xu Shangyu immediately picked it up.

"what's up?"

Hearing the voice on the phone, his face gradually became serious.After hanging up the phone after a while, Xu Shangyu said with a serious expression: "Sorry, I'm afraid I can't see you off first, I'm going to Linjiang Avenue."

"What happened?"

"The old man who took a walk in the morning found a male body on the embankment."

Xu Shangyu said: "It was washed ashore just this morning."