School grass, he is white and black

I have been different from others since I was a child. I am not talking about talents that are different from ordinary people, but that...

I am a freak.

My father was a lobby manager and my mother was a front desk lady.I seldom cry since I was born. When I saw other children crying when I was in kindergarten, I would think strangely:

Why are you crying?If you want to win something, wouldn't it be good to spend your time trying to win it?

But I found that my thoughts were different from others, because other children were unwilling to talk to me, and they would surround me in a circle, mocking me as a strange child with a smile.

Blame the kid?Bad boy?

These two should belong to the same category, so they are all bad kids who love to bully others. I am obviously no different from them, right?This baffles me.

"Mom, why do they all say I'm a weird kid?" After school, I held my mother's hand and asked curiously.

But mom seems to be very busy, she and dad always have to go to work, so mom said impatiently: "Then won't you learn from them and become a child like them?"

Today's sunset is very good, and the clouds have turned into fire clouds.I like such beautiful colors very much, but the people around me don't seem to appreciate the beauty, everyone comes and goes in a hurry.

Later, I listened to my mother and imitated the children around me, crying, acting like a baby, and speaking childish nonsense.Children are forgetful, and I got used to them within a few days.But there was no reaction behind my laughing and fighting, and I didn't even understand the meaning of these behaviors.

It's like seeing chained watchdogs entertaining themselves in my hometown. In my eyes, they are a group of dogs entertaining themselves.

But I also voluntarily disguised myself as a dog in order to become a normal person.

Since I went to elementary school, my mother and father have been a little busy at the beginning, and become very busy. I am the only one left in the empty house at night.

"Hey..." Mom went to the night shift after cooking at home. I was bored at home alone, so I lay on the window and saw a big yellow dog hunched over something in the corner, and the yellow hair around its mouth was stained. Pale red.

Curiosity drove me to run downstairs. When I got there, the yellow dog had long since disappeared. I pushed aside the grass and saw an orange cat whose stomach had been bitten open. The blood and internal organs were covered by the damn dog. Everywhere.

But I like it very much. I squatted down and admired the cat's mouth before it died. I even counted how many teeth this cute little guy has.Even the eyes that stared into a thin line in horror fascinated me, I couldn't help reaching out and touching the brown eyes that wouldn't move.

"What are you doing, Cui Kaige!" A sharp and sharp voice pulled me back from my thoughts, and I turned around to see my mother running over in a panic, her high heels making ear-splitting noises.

It's amazing how my mind is still thinking about what it's like to break through flesh with high heels.

My mother rushed in front of me, with beads of sweat on her forehead anxiously, seeing me standing next to the dead cat, she yelled angrily: "You bastard, why are you running around! You can still look at such a disgusting thing, you fucking Are you sick!!"

"I like it." Seeing my mother's expression that stopped abruptly, I raised a smile and continued: "I like watching this kind of thing."

This smile is what I have practiced for a long time, the innocent and lovely smile of a child.

But this time he didn't get likes and compliments, but a crisp slap in the face.

My mother looked at me in disbelief, with fear and emotions in her eyes that I didn't understand. If she didn't paint her lips bright red, I think my dear mother would have pale lips.

"You, you are really a sick freak..."

This matter was told to my father, and the man with a general belly watched the TV and said indifferently: "I am a big deal, a child knows nothing, you just take care of it as a mother."

"I'll take care of it? What about you, aren't you Cui Kaige's father? Why are all these responsibilities piled on me, an Omega??"

Such an angry mother made my father very impatient, and he also raised his voice and shouted: "It is very hard for me to earn money outside, so what should I do with him!"

"Didn't I go to work..."

……

I don't want to hear about the quarrel in the back anymore. I just stood at the entrance and looked at the two people with blushing faces and thick necks. I couldn't help but think in my mind: Am I really a freak?What is the difference between normal people and me?

I don't intend to give up the first pleasure of my vitality, so I will hide from my friends after school and go to the bridge to recruit wild cats by myself.Watching them lose their lives under my knife, and collecting parts that satisfy me one by one, this is probably the joy of my childhood.

But it's really a pity that my collection was found by the mother who cleaned the room, she screamed and threw away all my treasures, said I was a monster, and some words that I didn't understand, but I knew it must be no Nice swear words.

My mother took me to see a psychiatrist, and the doctor told my mother seriously that I had an emotional cognitive disorder.

"What is emotional cognitive impairment?" I sat obediently on the small bench and asked the doctor politely.

The doctor told me that emotional cognitive impairment is the inability to feel emotions and understand the emotions of others.I don't agree with this, I am eager to say that I feel happy emotions, that is, when I control the lives of small animals.

But the doctor frowned after hearing my words, and my mother turned pale, and I heard "anti-social" and "violent tendencies" later...

Then I was pressed to the hospital.Only then did I understand that it would be of no benefit to me to say some things, so I immediately learned to say the answers that my parents and doctors liked, and also restrained my pursuit of the things I liked.

In this way, I was discharged from the hospital soon, and my mother happily held me and said, "My son is finally normal."

It turns out that normal in everyone's eyes is such a simple thing. I just need to see what everyone wants, say what they want to hear, and do what they want to see to be a normal person.

It's really boring.

On the surface I smiled sweetly, and said sweetly: "Mom, I will be obedient." In fact, I didn't feel anything in my heart, and even felt ridiculous and sad.

People's desires will continue to increase with age. When I was seven years old, what I wanted was to see small animals struggling in my hands. When I was 14 years old, what I wanted was to see people around me struggle. Struggling with hands.

When I came into contact with the Internet, I was pleasantly surprised.I saw that every netizen's comments and messages on the Internet attracted many people to follow suit and discuss, and I suddenly had an idea.

Maybe I can use the virtual network to achieve my goal. Since I can't get blood on my hands, let others swing the knife for me.

I spent my spare time learning programming, which was not difficult for me, and I quickly became a hacker who can hide himself, a murderer who hides behind the virtual.

Operate in a virtual world

Smuggling between reality and the Internet

Use my means to guide those thoughtless people to criticize and comment, and enjoy the unbearable despair of being bullied by the Internet.I deeply feel the joy of being in control, and the excitement makes my soul tremble.

Around the third year of junior high, my parents had the most intense quarrel, and I vaguely pieced together the reason for it, probably because my father cheated and tagged an Omega, and then the woman went to my mother’s work with her stomach full The place finds her and asks the two to divorce.

They seem to be using the most vicious words in their lives on each other this night. The chaotic quarrel just makes me feel irritable. I even hope that they can never talk.

What worked was that my father pushed my mother onto the cabinet, and my mother's head was pierced by the tip of the cabinet, and the gurgling blood stained the snow-white tiles. My father was also dumbfounded. He touched my mother's nose and found that she was not breathing.

When I came out again, I saw my father sitting on the ground drinking wine, his mouth was vague and he didn't know what he was talking about.After a while he blushed and stopped moving. I felt for his pulse and it stopped beating.

Alcohol poisoning, I silently looked at the two people and the mess in the living room, and suddenly a childhood thought appeared in my mind:

Will a normal person's body be different from mine?

With the mentality of exploration, I used a knife to cut open the parents' bodies, and found that there was nothing special.But I still cut open the skin morbidly and peeped at the contents inside.

Oh, it turns out that everyone is just a lump of flesh, and a dead person should be a lump of lifeless flesh.

Then a freak like me is a piece of rotten meat, hahahaha.

"Have self-knowledge!" I couldn't help but boasted to myself, and I got up in a good mood to find a needle and thread, and sew up this tattered body.