Dude, your wig fell off

An He was pulled out of the water by Nachen, panting heavily with his eyes closed, his body was still tense, and he didn't relax.

Na Chen lowered his head and kissed his face and neck thinly, and stroked his body with his hands. He likes An He, who looks a little tired after venting. He has no defense, no distance, and no resistance under his hand. Every inch of the body is full of attraction.

"I'll carry you back to the house," Na Chen circled his fingers on his leg.

"Can you hold me?" An He opened his eyes and looked at him, scratching the hair on the back of his head.

This action made Na Chen feel very comfortable, and immediately pressed his face into the hollow of his shoulder, "Catch again."

An He smiled, and scratched his hair again: "Get up, I'll rush, my son is all over me."

"Your son is suffocated." Na Chen straightened up, holding the water in the bathtub and pouring it out with his hands, "Poor children, Uncle Daqi will send you off..."

"Silly," An He pushed him away, slowly stood up and stepped out of the bathtub, opened the shower pocket and pointed at him, "I'll find another set of pajamas for you."

"No need," Na Chen followed him out of the bathtub, and flushed the water together behind him, "I'm naked, so it's convenient for you to touch."

An He smiled silently.

After taking a shower, An He found a set of sportswear for Na Chen, and Na Chen shook the clothes: "What's your taste, it's red, and it's number 8..."

"The team uniform from the previous school." An He took out another small quilt from the cabinet and threw it on the bed. He didn't have a guest room here, and since that day just made him feel good, he couldn't let that day I sleep on the sofa, so I sleep on the bed.

"Basketball team? You still play basketball?" Na Chen lifted up his clothes and saw the name of a certain normal university printed on the front, "I thought you were playing video games."

"That's what I did before my sophomore year in high school." An He spread the quilt and patted it. "Do you sleep outside or inside?"

"I'll sleep on it," Na Chen said without thinking, "Have you changed your mind since your sophomore year in high school?"

An He didn't speak, and sat on the edge of the bed, seemingly in a daze.

Na Chen put on his ball uniform and sat beside him: "Don't sleep?"

"Sleep," An He seemed to come back to his senses suddenly, lifted the quilt and got in, "you can sleep in it."

Na Chen climbed onto the bed and got into the quilt too: "I'll cover it with you."

"I'm not used to it." An He closed his eyes.

"Why are you not used to me?" Na Chen clicked his tongue and turned to face him.

"It's here with me now." An He smiled, reached out and turned off the lights in the room.

"Is the light off outside?" Na Chen stretched his arms and looked towards the bedroom door, the light of the living room could still be seen through the crack of the door.

"Not off."

Na Chen was lying quietly, and only the ups and downs of the breathing of the two could be heard in the room, but the breathing was very energetic, and one could tell that neither of them had fallen asleep.

"Are you afraid of the dark?" Na Chen asked softly.

"Not afraid."

"Then why don't you turn off the lights?"

"Are you sleeping or not?" An He sighed, "You have been in the detention center for several days, are you still so energetic?"

"Detention center," Na Chen corrected him, "Are you...afraid of being alone? When the lights are on, you don't feel alone."

An He didn't make a sound, and it took a long time before he moved, raised his arms and rested his head behind his head: "Probably."

In fact, there are always people at home, many people. Every time An He comes home, he can see a house filled with smoke and mahjong, but he still feels lonely.

Mom was sitting there, but she didn't seem to belong to him, only winning or losing in her eyes, and dad was even more distant.

He stays alone among these unfamiliar or familiar figures, struggling to face all the things that will appear in life. His mother hardly gives him any attention except for a slap in the face, even if it is just a parent-teacher meeting. It can make him squat at the door of the house for two hours, repeatedly rehearsing how to talk to his mother without getting beaten.

He just wants a clean and refreshing home, with bright and warm lights, the sound of TV, the smell of food, a mother in his eyes and a father who can... see.

This is a luxury, and it is impossible for him to have it in his life, but he has always felt that he can let his children have such a home, a warm and reliable home.

Thinking of these, An He frowned, and the feeling of despair and helplessness when he first discovered his desire to have intimate physical contact with a man came up little by little.

And the greater desperation is that what changed his whole life is just a conquest for others.

Since then, whether facing men or women, he can no longer find the sense of belonging he wants.

"An He." Na Chen whispered in his ear.

"Huh?" An He suddenly pulled away from the memory, and he felt a little empty in an instant.

"What's wrong with you? You're not breathing right." Na Chen leaned over and looked at his face in the faint light.

"It's okay," An He smiled, "You can still understand breathing, it's so mysterious."

"My mother," Na Chen hesitated, "my mother used to suffer from illness...every time when she was in a bad mood, her breathing would change, and I could hear it."

An He turned his head, and Chen's breath warmed his face, and he turned sideways: "Really?"

"Really," Na Chen nodded, speaking with some difficulty, "She...I couldn't hear it at first, but...I have to hear it, or I don't have time...to escape."

An He couldn't see Na Chen's expression clearly, but his calm but hesitant voice made people feel depressed.

"Your mother... hit you?" An He asked tentatively, remembering the scar on Na Chen's neck.

"She didn't hit me very much when I was young," Na Chen squeezed closer to him, and put his head on his pillow, "My mother is very gentle."

An He made room for him and gave up half of the pillow.

"Are you sleepy?" Nachen asked him.

"Tell me, I'll listen," An He reached for the cigarette case on the bedside table, "Do you want a cigarette?"

"Aren't you afraid of setting the quilt on fire?" Na Chen smiled.

"Have you had a stroke, smoking a cigarette can light the quilt," An He took a cigarette and handed it to Na Chen, and then took a big iron moon cake box and put it on the quilt, "If you use this, you can still play On the quilt, I will pay to take you to the hospital tomorrow."

Nachen lit a cigarette and leaned against the bed, seeming to be remembering, and after a long silence, she said: "My mother is very gentle, she sings and plays very well, she can play the piano, and she also likes the violin. My grandma has always It is said that my mother was cast into the wrong fetus by some fairy, anyway, my aunts and my uncle are special..."

What's special, Na Chen didn't say anything, An He wanted to say that fairies probably don't reincarnate, but Na Chen took a puff of smoke and continued: "My mother has never talked to me loudly, if I do something wrong, she All I could do was cry, especially when I was in pain."

"What did you do wrong?" An He frowned.

"I don't know," Na Chen said hesitantly, staring at the cigarette for a long time before saying, "A lot of times it's because I didn't understand the music she played."

"I don't understand what it means, I don't know what the song is?" An He asked.

"It's just that... I didn't understand what the song was trying to express," Na Chen took a deep breath, "or what she wanted to express."

"How old were you then?" An He wasn't sure if his judgment of Na Chen's mother was correct, but he already had a rough outline in his mind.

"Before school," Na Chen bent one leg and tapped the rhythm with his hands on his knees. "If I couldn't understand, she would cry and keep playing."

Na Chen's voice lowered, and her hands tapped on her legs quickly: "Keep playing and playing, I can't go away, if I want to go away, she will tie me to the piano leg with a rope, keep playing and cry ..."

An He held Na Chen's hand and found that his hand was shaking very badly.

"That Chen..." He opened his mouth to change the subject temporarily.

But Na Chen interrupted him: "I'm crying too, I'm very anxious, why can't I understand, I want to understand, I want to see her smile, but I just can't understand, I feel a headache if I don't understand, Every time she plays a note, I feel pain, like being hit by a hammer..."

"Na Chen," An He sat up, extinguished both cigarettes, threw the box aside, and wrapped his arms around Na Chen's shoulders, "Let's not talk about it now."

"Actually, I don't understand until now," Na Chen said without stopping, speaking quickly, "I don't understand the songs she sings, the plays she sings, the tunes she plays, and what she says... , It’s all burned into my brain, but I still don’t understand!”

"Big Seven," An He turned on the bedside lamp, and a faint warm yellow filled the room. He looked into Na Chen's eyes, "Everyone expresses things differently, and it's not your fault."

"But she is my mother!" Na Chen suddenly raised his voice, "I can't understand what my mother means!"

"I know she's your mother," An He grabbed his shoulder and said in a steady voice, "but she's sick, and she can't make you understand that it's not your fault, she's a sick person."

Na Chen stopped, her breathing was a little anxious, her eyes fell on somewhere behind An He, and after a while she said softly: "Yes, my mother is crazy, she was already crazy at that time, it's just who Neither admit it."

"No one would easily admit that their relatives have a mental illness." An He said, patting Nachen on the back.

He suddenly felt very tired. Facing Na Chen who was confused and struggling, and facing Na Chen's dark past, he felt breathless. There was no doubt that Na Chen had psychological problems, but he didn't know how to relieve them. , when he faced that Chen, he had too many personal feelings, and he couldn't completely separate himself, so he couldn't make a correct judgment.

Even if these things are not counted, Chen has faced his mother for so many years, and his understanding of psychology is definitely not blank. He just said to draw a picture before, but before he said what to draw, Chen has already reacted sensitively. It was Fang Shuren who came over, and he could clearly feel Nachen's resistance.

"Grandma said that I would go crazy too, just like my mother," Na Chen suddenly smiled and lowered his head, "I was quite scared before, but after thinking about it, it didn't matter. If I went crazy too, I would I can understand what she means."

An He didn't speak, he was interested in Na Chen because of his beauty and temptation, and he was willing to tolerate Na Chen's approach because he felt some empathy, but now he found that Na Chen was far more complicated than he imagined, Na Chen's painful and entangled past was pulling him down little by little, and he followed Na Chen's ups and downs, sinking little by little into the gloom he was trying to get rid of.

Now he can't even say the most simple comforting words, that Chen seems to be full of injuries, maybe even the simplest touch will make him hurt.

"Are you hungry?" Na Chen suddenly looked up at him.

"Not hungry," An He was taken aback, "Are you hungry again less than two hours after eating?"

"I said I was hungry," Na Chen pressed his stomach, "What should I do?"

"...Steamed dumplings?" An He got off the bed with some helplessness and took the phone, "Noodles?"

"Sha County?" Na Chen asked with interest.

"Do you still know Sha County? Not Sha County. At this time, the snack bar behind the community is still delivering food. If you eat, I will ask him to deliver it." An He glanced at him, and the suffocating things that wrapped Nachen before The repressed emotions have no traces to be seen.

"Eat, do you have soup?" Na Chen hugged the quilt.

"It's quite particular, what kind of soup do you want? It's all in a small cup." An He found the phone number for the food delivery and prepared to dial.

"Pigeon soup."

"Why don't you want bird's nest! Concubine!"

"Is there? Xiao Anzi," Na Chen laughed, "how is his family's craftsmanship?"

"I have the same taste, but his family innovates when they have nothing to do. There is also fast food for two on Valentine's Day." An He dialed the number and asked the boss for two dumplings, two cups of chicken soup, and one for mixing. Looking at Na Chen's expression, it seems that there is plenty of room in his stomach, so he ordered another piece of porridge with preserved egg and lean meat.

Na Chen watched him hang up the phone and asked, "Who did you go to eat fast food for two on Valentine's Day?"

"The lover I can't see with me," An He opened the door and poured a cup of fruit tea in the living room. He was sleepy at first, but after being tossed by Na Chen, the drowsiness was gone, and he was almost awake from the wine. He turned on the computer , "Do you watch movies?"

"What movie?" Nachen followed, "SM? Bondage? Uniform?"

"Aren't you dying?" An He squinted at him.

"Who said I can't do it anymore, how can you say such a thing to a young man who is just 20 years old, do you want to try it?" Na Chen lay down on the sofa, "If you say I can't do it, you have to do it first, Uncle, you are already 28."

"Do you want to see it?" An He changed the topic back.

"Look, I'll follow whatever you want to watch." Na Chen smiled.

An He picked out a very old horror movie. He guessed that Chen should have never watched it at his age. He watched this movie when he was in junior high school.

"Super girl Reiko?" Nachen sat up and hugged a cushion, "Horror movie?"

"En." An He nodded, stood up and turned off the lights in the living room, leaving a floor lamp, and then sat back in front of the computer.

After the title was over, Nachen called him on the sofa: "Teacher An."

"What's the matter?" An He was smoking a cigarette.

"Don't you sit on the sofa?" Na Chen moved to the side and patted the sofa.

An He was happy, pressed pause, and looked back at Na Chen: "Are you afraid?"

"I'm cold," Na Chen hugged the cushion and flinched, "Come here and squeeze."

"The food delivery person will be here in a while, and you won't be cold after eating." An He sat without moving, looking at him happily.

"You're laughing!" Na Chen threw the cushion aside, stood up, walked to An He's side in two steps, grabbed his arm and pulled hard, "Come here!"

An He was pulled up from the chair by him, and before he could stand still, he was carried by Na Chen on his shoulders, and then fell hard onto the sofa.

"So timid." An He adjusted his posture, bent his legs and leaned on the sofa.

Na Chen sat down next to him, hugged the cushion and curled up into a ball: "Who doesn't have anything to be afraid of? When I was young, my grandma always told me ghost stories, which scared me to tears. She was so happy, so happy. "

"Your grandma..." An He wanted to say what kind of hobby your grandma is.

"She's willing to tell me," Na Chen hooked the corners of his mouth, "She can't scare my cousin, but she can scare me."

An He didn't make a sound. He found that Na Chen had never mentioned his father's relatives. He usually talked about grandma and aunts. He tried to ask: "Xu Jingyao is..."

"My aunt's daughter," Na Chen said, "I don't see her a few times a year, and I haven't seen my grandpa for many years."

"Why don't you go and have a look?" An He asked. Speaking of which, he himself hasn't seen his relatives for many years. In the words of his mother, if there is anything to see, playing mahjong only costs two yuan.

"There's nothing to see." Na Chen covered his eyes with his hands, and looked at the computer screen through his fingers. "When my dad wanted to marry my mom, the whole family objected, and they all did it. Besides, my dad didn't want me to go there."

An He didn't ask any more questions. He didn't want to go into the details of how much influence and harm his parents and family had on Na Chen. He was afraid that he wouldn't be able to bear it.

Both of them didn't speak any more, they looked at the computer silently.

An He watched this kind of movie almost every day, which was scary and depressing. Now this movie doesn't feel too big to him.

At that time, Chen probably didn't look at him very often, and he was getting tighter and tighter next to him.

The sound of the piano came from the empty piano room. When I went to look at it, the cloth covering the piano slipped gently.

The doorbell was rang at this moment, and Na Chen jumped up from the sofa with a loud cry, then turned around and threw himself on An He: "Ah——"

An He was not frightened by the movie, but was so frightened by Na Chen's roar that he almost hugged him tearfully.

"You..." An He pushed him, "The delivery man is here."

Na Chen glanced at him, jumped over and turned off the video: "Don't watch it!"

"Yeah." An He smiled, got up and opened the door.

The owner of the snack shop standing outside the door glanced into the room vigilantly: "Are you all right?"

"No, I'm watching a horror movie, and you just ring the doorbell." An He handed over the money.

"It's late at night..." The boss clicked his tongue twice, took the money and left.

An He took all the food that was delivered to the kitchen, put it in a bowl and put it on the table, looked at Nachen who was nestled in the sofa: "Eat? Are you scared and hungry?"

"Let's change to a comedy in a while." Na Chen sat down at the table and picked up his chopsticks.

An He pushed a cup of soup in front of him: "I won't be afraid after eating it."

Na Chen looked at the food and held his chopsticks for a long time without moving.

"What's wrong?" An He asked.

"I really like the feeling of sitting at the table at home and eating." Na Chen smiled, bowed his head and took a sip of soup.

"Yes, I like it too," An He put a dumpling into his mouth, chewed it slowly, and said in a low voice after swallowing it, "But it hasn't been like this for a long time."

Or, basically, never did.

"Then what do you usually eat?" Na Chen asked him.

"Just eat it like that, make some noodles and order a takeaway and eat it in front of the computer." An He said with a smile.

"I'm so sorry for the food!" Na Chen frowned, "But this food doesn't taste very good, it's not as delicious as what I make."

"Really?" An He looked at him, that Chen was good at making fruit tea, so he didn't know what it was like to cook.

"Go to my place to eat once before school starts. I'll make it for you, but I didn't make it after I said twice." Na Chen put down his chopsticks and said seriously, "An He, I want to treat you to my cooking. Cai, are you coming?"

An He's chopsticks that were about to pick up the dumplings stopped, and he didn't speak for a long time.