solo not solo

How many people can a person know in a lifetime?It's hard to say, after all, everyone's living environment, nature of work, personality, etc. are too different.But what is certain is that as long as you can know each other, it is a kind of fate, and of course this also includes a kind of more painful fate - evil fate.

Maizi and Spinach were favorites when they were young. They were regarded as treasures before they were born, and they were loved by their parents like pearls and treasures after they were born.There are parents at home, the older ones went to kindergarten, and after school, there is a protective and strong brother, and a gentle and kind "sister-in-law"?Almost no setbacks.If they had to say that they were dissatisfied with something, it was undoubtedly God who made them know Su Jiahao and Su Jiarui.

It is said that twins marry twins, happiness is easy, but they do not meet this sentence, because they are the same gender.

When I was young, I was in kindergarten, because I was a child, so whether I liked it or not, or whether I liked the same sex, was just a joke in the eyes of teachers and parents. Take it seriously.After all, it is still too young, and the relationship is still too far from maturity.But who would have thought that some feelings, once let go, will persistently move forward, and can never stop or retreat?

Maybe life can never be perfect...

"Old son, have you really thought about it?" Liu Zhendong flicked the cigarette ash, and heaved a long sigh.He has seldom smoked in these years, but today he is indeed a little melancholy.Perhaps this emotion is not suitable for him, but who made him also a father?

"Dad, I'm sorry." Shan Zeyu lowered his head, looking very guilty.He knew that his request was very simple to his father, and with his father's current status, it was only a matter of one sentence to let him join the army, but at his age, there was indeed some...

"You didn't apologize to me." Liu Zhendong patted Sanzi's head, thought for a while and said, "I didn't want either you or Maizi to join the army, but since you insist on going, Dad won't stop you either. But ...Old son, are you sure you want this? You know it's not fair to you."

"Dad? How do you know..."

"Dad is not old yet."

"Oh, that's right, you are still in your prime, and you have sharp eyes and ears." Shan Zeyu curled his lips and said, "It doesn't matter if it's fair or not, someone has to quit. Since the Su family can only recognize one person, I won't force it." He is not the Holy Mother, but since his second brother is already with Su Jiahao, he can no longer fight for that spot.That's not his style, and he can't do that kind of thing.And he knew that it was not without reason that the Su family only talked to him alone.They knew that he would give in, and they also knew that he would not tell anyone. Even if he told Jia Rui, Jia Rui would definitely make the same choice as him, because they were very similar since childhood.They are always able to see the facts first, and understand that enough is enough.

Jia Rui has a flexible mind and is sensitive to political information. With the help of his family, it can be said that his official career is bright. Although the Su family said that they only recognized one person, they would not let Jia Rui become this person.From the very beginning, some things were already doomed, and the two people who were doomed to be together could only be Su Jiahao and Shan Zeyu, not Su Jiarui and him, Shan Zeyu.

"Xiaofei disagrees with you leaving us too far away, but you don't want to be too close, so I made a compromise and chose a few places for you. Chengzhou, Wuqiaoshan, Yanghu..." Liu Zhendong paused, then He continued: "There is also Lin Shi."

"No matter where I am, as long as I'm not by your side, Feifei will feel far away." Thinking of his unusual mother, Shan Zeyu smiled helplessly, "Dad, let's go to Lin Shi, I like it there .”

"Isn't it because it's the farthest there?"

Shan Zeyu lowered his head and smiled without rebuttal.Even if he denies it, a shrewd man like his father will still guess it.

"When do you want to leave?" Seeing that Aizi really had no intention of turning back, Liu Zhendong stopped trying to stop him.It is his father's principle to provide the greatest support at the right time.

"As soon as possible, I want to experience your dad's life earlier. But I'm sure I'm not as good as you, so don't criticize me then." Shan Zeyu smiled and took the half-smoked cigarette butt from his father , Stuffed it in the ashtray and said: "It's better not to smoke in the future, lest Feifei say that you forced him to become a chatterbox."

"Understood." Liu Zhendong listened to his son's persuasion, waved his hands and said, "Go and pack your things, I have to think about how to deal with our Tai Zuo." At that time, he promised not to let his son go to Lin Shi.

Shan Zeyu got up, went to make a cup of tea for his father, and then went back to his bedroom.

Holding the cup of something fragrant, Liu Zhendong frowned involuntarily.His old son was like this. He looked carefree, but he was actually a meticulous and serious person. No matter in appearance, ability, or character, he was a rare and good partner.But it was precisely because of this that he disliked that child Su Jiarui even more.Both families know that Su Jiarui is talented and smart, but that child lacks the courage to break the boat, and he is not the kind of Su Jiahao who will stalk, and his old son is too sober to do things that make things difficult for the other party and his relatives. matter.Two people like this, even if they are together, are just hurting each other.

"It's too unscientific for two poor kids who are as fat as piglets to grow up to be good-looking talents." Liu Zhendong shook his head, took a sip of tea, and his tone was full of puzzlement.In the end, he realized that it was because the old man of the Su family was too reliable, otherwise, how could the couple who like to show off by the Su family alone be able to teach their children so well.

In this compartment, Shan Zeyu took out his suitcase without hesitation and began to pack his things.

In fact, there are not many. Lin Shi is to the south, which is much warmer than here, and he doesn't need to bring any clothes. Anyway, most of them will wear military uniforms at that time, so he only needs to bring some necessities.

When he was almost done tidying up, he picked up the electronic photo frame on the bedside table and looked at it for a while, and when the photo on it changed to a certain one, he clicked still.The photo on the top stayed there and did not change for a long time.Inside are photos he took when he was in middle school. There are three brothers of them, two brothers of the Su family, and two brothers of the He family.Seven and a half kids gathered together, wearing new school uniforms, making all kinds of grimaces.Among them, the one who laughed the most heartlessly was Su Jiahao and He Qingsheng, the second child of the He family.He Qingsheng was the youngest, and he had just entered the first grade of junior high school at that time, and his elder brother and Su Jiarui were both about to take the college entrance examination.

After letting the photos scroll again, he put the things back on the bedside table, when the phone rang suddenly.

Without looking back, he knew who it was.

"Hey?"

"It's me, come out, I'm at your door."

"Hmm." Shan Zeyu closed the suitcase and took the wallet and keys with him.It just so happened that he was also going out to dye his hair black, and to get two more pairs of black contact lenses to take away.I haven’t done these things since I graduated from university. It’s too troublesome, but I have to continue in the future. After all, purple hair and purple pupils are not reliable in the army.

Su Jiarui drove here by himself. It was getting cold now, but he was still waiting under the car instead of sitting in the car.Walking up to him, Shan Zeyu could feel a chill, obviously this person had been waiting for a long time.They haven't seen each other for a while, it's not that they don't want each other, but...knowing that it's fruitless, so they would rather endure it.

"Is there anywhere you want to go?" Su Jiarui started the car, but never looked at Shan Zeyu directly.This is not not to be seen, but to escape.

"Go to Shen Ge." Shan Zeyu said: "If you have enough time, otherwise, you can send me to a place where I can take a taxi." Shen Ge is an image design shop he often goes to, and it is more professional.The boss there is also nice, one of the few designers who knows that his hair color and eye color are naturally purple.

Su Jiarui didn't say yes or no, but started the car and drove in the direction Shan Zeyu said.He came out today because he asked for leave, and this was the first time he asked for leave since he became the mayor's assistant in Songyun City.Before coming here, I thought about countless things to say to Shan Zeyu, but when I actually arrived at his door, it took time to gather the courage to even make a phone call.Obviously, she has always been very neat in doing things in the political circle, but she always becomes cowardly when it comes to emotional issues.Perhaps General Liu is right, he lacks the courage to break the boat, and he has too many concerns about his family.

"I went to the hospital to find you, they said you resigned, why?"

"I didn't like the atmosphere there, so I just changed the unit." Shan Zeyu said as he pulled down the car window a little, successfully allowing the cold wind to come in.The temperature in the car suddenly dropped a lot, and his mind became clearer.I don't know why recently, but I always think about things from my childhood, which makes me feel a little dazed, and he doesn't like this.

"Where is the new unit?"

"In Linshi."

"Zi..." The ear-piercing sound of brakes immediately slid into the eardrums, making Shan Zeyu frowned.

"What are you doing running so far?!" Su Jiarui roared, "Even... even if we can't be together, can't we get closer?"

"What are you yelling about? What's the use of being so close? We can be together if we look more often? You wake up!" Shan Zeyu took a cigarette and lit it, tugging at his hair irritably, trying to control it I calmly said: "You should know which path you chose, I'm just trying to make it easier for us all. You can't...let me stay here and watch you marry a woman."

"..."

"Look, don't you have anything to say? This is reality." Shan Zeyu took a deep puff of smoke, and said after a long time: "Forget it, tell yourself that you have never been Su Xiaopang, and I will just be Su Xiaopang." I've never been a spinach, we're... just alumni of 20 years, nothing else."

"You... forget?"

"...I'll walk the rest of the way by myself, and you don't need to see me off." Shan Zeyu got out of the car, and the door slammed loudly.The sound was like a blunt hammer chiseling in his heart, and it hurt dully.To forget or not to forget, what's the difference?There is only one result: they cannot be together.

There was a time when he almost forgot who his other twin brother was, because as he grew up, he spent more and more time with Su Jiarui.There are so many similarities in their thoughts, they can always have the same interest, they don't need too many words, they have a tacit understanding, they... They naively thought that they had become one, and they had been together for a lifetime will not change.

The wind in late autumn is a bit bleak, rolling up fallen leaves and blowing them over, making passers-by on the road even more lonely.Shan Zeyu gathered the collar of his windbreaker, and walked towards Shen Ge on foot.He wants to cut his hair short and dye it black, and he wants to tell himself that he is no longer that little spinach who is surrounded by the second young master of the Su family.

I can't tell how many wrong roads I have walked, but it was almost dark when I arrived at Shen Ge, and the business in the store was relatively good.As soon as Shan Zeyu entered the room, he attracted a lot of eyes from all walks of life.Envious, jealous, and curious, his refined appearance almost caught the eyes of everyone in the room.

"Why is it here at this time?" The boss greeted him personally, took the windbreaker from Shan Zeyu's hand, and led him to the independent image design studio.

"Why haven't I been here at this time before?"

"Well, almost always come here early in the morning." The boss motioned his assistant to get a cup of hot drink before continuing: "What are you going to do this time? Is it still the same?"

"No, this time... cut it into board inches and dyed it black."

"Ah?!" The boss involuntarily put his hand on Shan Zeyu's forehead and said, "Are you crazy?!"

"No, I'm serious. I'm going to serve in the army, and it's inappropriate now." Shan Zeyu made a very serious expression, indicating that he was not joking.

"You're forcing me to waste everything." The boss angrily put the hot drink on the shelf in front of the mirror with a bang, and regretfully stroked Shan Zeyu's shoulder-length hair and said, "I'm sorry you chose the wrong master. It grows on my head... tsk tsk."

"Stop rambling, cut it quickly."

"I still have to think about how to cut it to get the best effect? ​​You can drink your juice!" The boss rolled his eyes, and compared his hands on Shan Zeyu's head like this, and then compared it again, it would not delay Shan Zeyu's drinking thing.

After Shan Zeyu finished drinking, the boss had a general idea in his mind.He asked his assistant to order to fetch some things, and chatted with Shan Zeyu for a while before he started to work with the scissors.He felt that he was in a terrible mood now, and had a bad feeling of destroying rare treasures with his own hands.

"Since my hair is dyed black, should I also wear colored contact lenses?"

"Well, don't you have them here, just bring me a few more pairs of black ones later." Shan Zeyu said and closed his eyes, no longer looking at himself in the mirror.He does it every time, and loves to open his eyes and see something change.

The voice in his ears seemed to have a calming effect, and he became a little sleepy after a while.This feeling is familiar, a little erratic, like... just like the feeling when Jia Rui combed his hair when he was a child, it was very relaxed and comfortable...

"What do you mean you are not a princess? Young master, when did I comb someone's hair!" The fat Su Jiarui said awkwardly.

"I am not the life of a princess, I am the life of a prince, you idiot! There is no distinction between men and women!"

"You are the prince's life? Then what am I!!!" Second Young Master Su refused to accept it.

"You are a servant, Xiaopang Su who combs my hair specially, hahaha."

……

"Is there really no other way?" In a trance, the boss's voice suddenly broke in.

"What?" Shan Zeyu suddenly opened his eyes, not understanding what the other party said for a moment.

"You and that bamboo horse... You went to be a soldier, wasn't it because of him?" The boss smiled and said, "You used to come early in the morning, in high spirits, as if...you were going on a date with the person you love the most. At that time We often guess who the happiest kid in the world will be."

"Since when did you become such a gossip?"

"Brother, it's not that I want to be eight, but someone forced me to have to." The boss said and handed over a box of colored contact lenses, and pointed towards the door: "You are not bad looking, and you are very suitable."

Shan Zeyu took the things and looked at the door, who else could it be if it wasn't Su Jiarui? 1.8 meters tall, with a tall and straight figure, wearing a white shirt that was washed like new, and a dark blue suit. When he stood at the door, he took half of the scenery in the room.

"For the sake of not being able to meet again for a long time, this time, the bill is free. You can wash off the dye on your hair in a while and it will be ok." After the boss finished speaking, he walked towards the door, and he heard that he was getting closer The assistant said bitterly: "Boss, this man insists that his wife is here. Is he... um? eh?" Pointing to the position of his temple, he gave a puzzled look.

The boss patted the assistant and said, "He's not mentally ill, his wife is here. Let's go out, it's very bad behavior to be a light bulb."

Assistant: "=□=|||" That's not what he meant!He wanted to ask if this person was the assistant mayor of a certain city! ! !

Shan Zeyu looked at his glasses, touched his short hair, then went to wash his hands in silence, put on colored contact lenses and said, "What are you doing here?"

"Didn't I say that you don't like people touching your hair?" After holding back for a long time, Su Jiarui sighed.

"I also said that I have no plans to grow long hair, so when you are more skilled, come ask me again."

"Stubborn and you." Su Jiarui reluctantly took Shan Zeyu's hand, pulled him to the hair washing place, let him lie down, then tested the water temperature, and took off his shirt after making sure it was all right. Coat, start to wash the dye on the lover's head.

"How are Jiahao and my second brother? I haven't seen them for a while." Shan Zeyu asked casually with his eyes closed.

"Well, they might...maybe..."

"what?"

"Maybe I'm going to be a dad."

"Really? That would be nice."

"Small domain..."

"Ah."

"Small domain..."

"What?"

"You don't like someone else, do you?"

"Wash your hair!"

"..."