Rebirth of Su Shi

Can I not say it?Can I change doctors?Can you just leave?Yu stroke...

When Tang Chao brought me to know them, he didn't introduce what they were doing, so I was quite surprised to see Ding Qihui, who was a psychiatrist.

I always thought that a prince like them was either an official or was just eating and drinking in a certain unit. I never thought that he would be a psychiatrist. If I mentioned it last time, when I was looking for a psychiatrist, I would definitely hear [ Ding] is a detour.

"Do you want to change to a psychiatrist?"

His voice interrupted the broken thoughts in my heart.I cheered up and shook my head at the man with a gentle smile in front of me.

Then Ding Qihui said to me: "Actually, you want to nod, right?"

"No." I quickly denied.

"I'm a psychiatrist. Every expression and every small movement of the other party is his [mouth] to me. They are more reliable than what your mouth says." He raised his eyebrows and looked at I.

Does that mean he knows what I'm thinking?I was speechless.

If it is true as he said, wouldn't I become [transparent] in front of him?

Immediately, I felt that I was tossing around with nothing to do, why did I find a psychiatrist?Isn't this making yourself guilty?

I heard him chuckle and say, "I know what you're worried about, but what I can tell you is that I have my work ethic. I won't say a word if I shouldn't, trust me, I would be your best choice."

"..." Maybe a psychiatrist has this kind of ability to relax the whole body. His words and the expression on his face gradually calmed down my restless heart. The word [trust] is also inexplicably formed Heart rises.

Forget it, now I can't walk, I can't talk, what should I do?

I turned my head, looked at him and smiled and said, "I'm asking for a friend of mine."

Coming out of the clinic, I casually walked on the sidewalk, repeating in my mind the result of Ding Qihui’s diagnosis—slight schizophrenia.

In fact, this thing is also called [self-awareness differentiation].The so-called differentiation of self-consciousness means that the observer divides the self into two parts, namely the observer self and the observed self.Due to ego differentiation, the ego of the observer becomes the subject, and the ego of the observed becomes the object.

[Ideal Self] is - Su Shi.

[Real self] is - Fang Feiyu.

The ideal self is formed by a person in accordance with moral principles and social requirements, that is to say, because of the reasons for my rebirth and the factors around me, I choose to use Su Shi's memory, activate Su Shi's character, and live Su Shi's life .

But the fact is that I clearly know that I am not the real Su Shi, so I have caused [differentiation of self-awareness].

——To put it simply, I am Su Shi and Fang Feiyu. I subjectively want to be Su Shi, but I clearly know that I am not, which is why I have a slight schizophrenia.

Ding Qihui said that if this continues, schizophrenia will directly lead to the emergence of dual personalities.

Because I told him before that I was helping [a friend], so I just told him about the symptoms during this period.

After he analyzed the results for me, he began to ask me about [friend's] past.

Because I got the result, my heart was already in a mess. In the atmosphere he deliberately created, I almost slipped my mouth. After realizing it, I hurriedly got up and said goodbye to him.

I know he doesn't believe I'm running to see a therapist for [friend], but that's out of my hands.If he really has a work ethic, then it doesn't matter to me whether I believe it or not.

After passing the display window of a specialty store, I couldn't help but stop and turn around to look at the figure reflected in the glass.

Schizophrenia...dual personality...

I clearly know that my situation is not as simple as Ding Qihui said.What happened last night was that I couldn't control this body, but my mind was clear at that time, so I'm sure it's not my problem, but this body problem.

I don't understand why this is happening!Is the real Su Shi dead or not?His soul is still in this body?Or is it my presence that made him fall asleep?Today, three years later, such a situation occurred, did he wake up?

If it is as guessed, is it possible that after he wakes up, I will disappear...and really die?

His hands and feet trembled unconsciously, his body swayed unconsciously, his feet went limp, and he staggered back two steps, but he couldn't stabilize himself and fell to the ground directly.

Now, my mind is blank, I just stare at [myself] reflected in the display window, and I don’t even notice the pedestrians on the road pointing at me, "Su Shi? Su Shi?"

In a trance, I heard someone calling me in my ear, and I turned my head blankly.

Looking at the people squatting beside me, I felt like being struck by lightning, and I woke up from my insanity, and then I grinned at the people around me.

"What a coincidence."

Meeting two boys from the Tang Dynasty in one day, do you want to be so bloody? !

"...What a coincidence." Zhou Jue helped me up.

My calf was a little numb, I put my hand on my leg and took a step back, "Thank you."

"What's wrong with your hand?" He looked at my hand, "It's bleeding again, should I send you to the hospital for re-bandage?"

Hearing the blood, I put my hands behind my back, "No, it's not a big problem."

"Why are you sitting here in a daze?"

"I didn't pay attention when I walked, and my feet hurt when I fell, so I sat and rested for a while."

"Seeing that you are not in good spirits, come sit with me in a nearby coffee shop and have a rest before going back?" Zhou Jue changed the subject helplessly when he saw that I was talking nonsense with my eyes open.

I wanted to refuse at first, but I changed my mind the moment I opened my mouth, "Come to another place, is there a place to drink tea here? I don't want coffee."

*****

Zhou Jue took me to a club. The environment here is very good and quiet, and the conversation between the guests is also suppressed.

After sitting down, he shrank himself tiredly in the chair and didn't speak, while he played silence with me after ordering tea.

The waiter brought the tea up, and then watched him fiddle with it in a decent manner, and then he pushed the cup filled with tea in front of me.

Wine is full of respect, tea is full of deceit, he thinks I don't understand, right?

Too lazy to care about it, he carefully picked up the teacup with his injured hands and drank it in one gulp.

Seeing my embarrassed appearance, Zhou Jue didn't say anything, and filled me up again with the same expression on his face.

"..." I looked up and swept across his face.

Is he determined to bully me?Looking at the cup filled with this tea in front of me, I hesitated whether to drink it or not.After pondering for a long time, he still picked up the teacup with his injured hands and poured half of the tea on the ground in front of him.

He didn't say a word about my behavior, he still looked at me with a smile, and he looked like he planned to wait for me to finish the rest of the tea before filling it up for me.

Damn, this guy—what a fucking fuck! !

Then, the two of us played silently with our own minds.This silence lasted for nearly an hour, and the waiter even changed a pot of tea for us.

The first time I drank tea, it made my stomach full. There was another [sequelae] after drinking too much tea, which was the urgency to urinate.

Hold back, hold back, can't stop!then--

"I'm leaving first, and there are still some things waiting for me to deal with. I didn't bring much money when I came out. This time, you invite me, and I will invite you again when I have a chance." As I said, I stood up.

Zhou Jue didn't stand up with me, but raised his head slightly and said to me: "Finally speak? I thought you were going to pretend to be dumb."

"..."

"You look like this every time you see me, what did I offend you?"

"Did you misunderstand? I've always treated people I don't know well like this, and it's not against you. "

"We've met a few times, right? In any case, we can be regarded as half acquaintances. It is necessary for you to distinguish the relationship between us so clearly?"

Well, now that we've gotten to the point, I knew his purpose for inviting me this time would not be that simple.

I bent down, narrowed the distance between me and him, and blew at him temptingly: "What's the relationship between me and you?"

Zhou Jue didn't expect to make such a move, and he reacted quickly after being stunned for a moment.

After he sneered, "You are gay, and now you are doing this to a man, are you planning to seduce?"

I stood up straight again, and put on a self-deprecating look, "Aren't you seducing me? Why did you say that I seduced you instead? Could it be... I am self-indulgent?"

He froze, "...you know?"

"What do you think?" I asked without answering.

After he reacted, he chuckled, seeing him pick up the teacup on the table and take a sip of tea before opening his mouth again.

"You knew it when you first met me?"

I smiled and remained silent.

He didn't ask any more, because everyone knew the conversation just now, so he simply changed the subject, "Looking at you like this today, are you broken in love?"

Zhou Jue is even more difficult than Tang Chao. Tang Chao alone is enough to give me a headache. If another one is more difficult, should I still live a normal life?

I glanced around and found that no one noticed here, I bent down again and whispered in his ear: "I don't want to talk to you about my problems. But what I can tell you is that I have a lover, and the relationship is very good. When you see me in the future, you don't need to seduce me with your eyes anymore....That's it, I'll go first." Take a step back, give him a polite smile, then turn and leave.

Zhou Jue is not only difficult to deal with, but also easy to mess with.

When I met him for the first time, I didn't see that he was gay, this person was hidden too deeply, even I couldn't see it, I'm afraid his friends wouldn't know it either.

If you want to ask me why I know he is interested in me, I can only say that it is because he showed his clues on purpose for me to find out.

This kind of person is not something I can mess with. If I remember correctly, when Tang Chao took me to meet them, he said that he grew up with Zhou Jue.

Even people like Tang Chao follow him, one can imagine how powerful he is.

When I see him in the future, I have to go around and try to avoid meeting him. Of course, what I hope more is-don't meet with [Coincident] again!

Also, is there a restroom near here? ? ? ? TAT

*****

When I got home, I found that Fang Lin was not there again, so I knew without thinking that he went to the next door to find old man Li to play Go.

When I returned to my room, I found that the inside had been cleaned up, and I was relieved, but I felt uncomfortable when I thought that I had made blood all over here last night.

He opened the drawer of the bedside table and took out the medicine, and was about to go out to pour water, when he saw the flashing mobile phone.

He stretched out his finger and pressed a button casually, and the screen lit up.Seeing the message of more than a dozen missed calls displayed on it, he sighed, and carefully picked up the phone with his hand to look through the query.

There were three calls from the elder sister, and the rest were all from Tang Chao.

"Sister, it's me."

"Are you on leave today?" Su Fu's voice came over.

"kindness."

"Aunt Luo even sent you medicine, which made her a waste of time."

"I asked for leave temporarily. I was too urgent so I didn't have time to say hello. I'm really sorry."

"You said you are serious. It seems that the effect of this medicine is very good. It is not good to stop the medicine at will."

"There's a reason for what happened today, don't worry, I'll ask Fang Lin to get it from you later, I can't come over if I have something to do." She must not know about the injury, or she must make a fuss, it's still a trivial matter, let her worry That's the big deal.

"Okay. By the way, I heard from your brother-in-law that you and Xiao Linzi plan to open a bookstore? Why do you think you play first and then play?"

"I don't want you to worry." Although she was not in front of me, I could imagine her staring at me, so I stuck out my tongue involuntarily and started acting like a baby to her on the other end of the phone.

"Okay, don't give me this set. You ask Fang Lin to get it at my house. Aunt Luo is waiting at home. Don't forget to drink medicine at night."

I thanked you and asked, "Did the second sister call you? I have been gone for several days, and I haven't seen her call back to report that she is safe."

"No, who knows what she's doing all day. She ran outside a few months after she came back. Look at her, she's 27 years old and still like this. I don't know when and what kind of man can restrain her."

"I'll just ask, don't be angry, maybe I'll bring you a man with fair skin and blue eyes this time." Hearing that Su Fu was in a hurry, I quickly comforted her.

"I hope so. As long as I can keep her under control, I won't bother to care what she is like. I won't tell you. I still have work to do. I'll hang up first."

After hanging up the phone, the hand holding the phone felt a little sore, and just as I was about to put it down, it suddenly occurred to me that Tang Chao also called me, so I found out his number and called back.

The phone went through quickly.

"Why didn't you answer the phone until now?"

"Recently, the company has taken on a big project, and a lot of information is with me. I went to the company to hand over to my colleagues." Although Tang Chao's words were questioning, his tone seemed to be much softer than usual, not so aggressive, it was my illusion ?

"You just got home now?"

I heard someone calling him from his side, but he ignored it.

"Well, I heard someone calling you, go and do your business first, I'm going to sleep for a while." The relationship between the two eased, and unconsciously, they even relaxed their tone of voice.

"Your hand is hurt, don't get wet. Is that Fang Lin there? Ask him to wait on you."

I rolled my eyes, "Got it."

Looking at the phone that had already been hung up, I felt an unreal feeling of trance when I thought that he and I were just together.

After walking out of the bedroom and taking the medicine, I didn't go back to my room, because I felt uncomfortable when I thought that my bedroom was stained with my own blood before, so I went to Fang Lin's room to sleep.

When Fang Lin came back, I opened my eyes dimly, told him to go to the eldest sister's house to get the medicine, and fell asleep again.