[Waiting for the end of the world] Dongli chrysanthemum

Tao Liangsheng is an accountant. He has been engaged in accounting work since he graduated from university. Although he has changed several companies, his salary has risen as he became proficient in the business. Especially after he obtained the senior accountant certificate, his income is very considerable.He is a careful person. He probably knew about his sexual orientation when he was in junior high school, but he never mentioned it to others. He even arranged for himself a future path, like most sexual men, to find a good woman He got married, had a son and a half daughter, served his parents, and raised children, so he talked about a woman who was a teacher. She was very nice, kind-hearted, and intellectually mature, and she was a good candidate for his wife.

The accident happened after seeing the female teacher's cousin. Tao Liangsheng found that he had an extreme desire for her cousin, even to the point where he didn't think about eating and drinking. He panicked and struggled fiercely, and finally cut off the idea of ​​marrying the female teacher , Such a good woman, he shouldn't cheat her, she deserves a better man, and a true love.

So he found an excuse to break up with the female teacher. At that time, they had already met their parents, and they were almost on the point of discussing marriage. The female teacher was very sad. Tao Liangsheng hardened his heart and went away. .For the family's urging, he always adopts the method of procrastination. As for the future, he will wait until there is no way to procrastinate.

He conceals his sexual orientation, doesn't talk about girlfriends, but doesn't look for men either.He has been ill since he was a child, and resisting serious illnesses has developed his tenacious character. He lives a life that is almost equivalent to that of an ascetic monk. He doesn't have many friends, but the few he has are very good friends, but he has never mentioned to them that he likes him. men's business.

Often sitting in front of the computer, sometimes working or contacting business, must use Koukou, a very popular online communication tool. Tao Liangsheng never adds strangers. Once he added a client, who knew that strangers applied for friends at the same time. I didn’t pay attention, so I added it, only to realize that I made a mistake, so I had to add the customer again, and immediately started negotiating business, and the stranger who broke in accidentally forgot to delete it.

That Mid-Autumn Festival, I was alone in a foreign land, and the mooncakes distributed by the company were placed on the coffee table in the living room of the apartment without even opening the packaging.Tao Liangsheng drank a little wine, felt a little drunk, surfed the Internet, and the button was still hung up very late, and then the stranger suddenly spoke to him.

That person didn't ask you what your name is, where you are from, and what you do, these are very common and boring questions.Instead, I asked him, [Mid-Autumn Festival, is there anyone with me? ] It seems that love sprouts in an instant.One sided love.Maybe it can be called unrequited love.

Tao Liangsheng gradually became acquainted with the man who was nearly ten years younger than him, and gradually talked about everything, even told him his sexual orientation.

They meet, they make love.

Tao Liangsheng interacted with that man with a mood like moths to a flame, burning all the passion and feelings accumulated for 30 years with anger.

Perhaps from the very beginning, he knew that he and that young man had no future, so after the man said that they had no passion together, Tao Liangsheng accepted the fact calmly.

The days were the same as before, and Tao Liangsheng still went to and from get off work as usual, it seemed that there was no difference.Only he himself knows that he will never return to the past state of no waves.So on New Year's Eve last year, he suddenly told his parents the fact that he could not marry a woman.

Before that, he discovered that his cousin Tao Jingming seemed to be of the same class, and even openly went out with his boyfriend, and the villagers had discussions in private, and some bad words, but they were not affected, that kind of wanton and free and easy His posture made him very envious, but envy was envy, he knew that he couldn't be like his cousin.

At least his parents were still there, and he couldn't make them lose their heads in front of the villagers.He said to his old father and mother like this: "I can't marry a woman, but I will serve you all my life. I will live alone in this life."

He left Yunyin Village to go to work on the eighth day of the Lunar New Year. He didn't work for a long time before returning to the village.

The solar radiation is getting stronger and stronger, coupled with the almost nationwide drought, more and more companies cannot continue to sustain themselves, and the bosses have long vacations. In fact, no one knows when this disaster will end. Tao Liangsheng simply Quit your job, pack your bags and go home.

Many fellow villagers went back together.At that time, the term "radiation rat" was already used. Those creatures who like to stay in the sewers, I don't know when they started to become bolder. Not only did they run around during the day, but they also started eating human flesh.

There are other creatures affected by radiation in the wild, perhaps due to the shortage of food, they are much more aggressive.He told his parents that he and his fellow villagers were going to go home together. Unexpectedly, Da Jin brought Xiao Huang and their children to escort him on the day he went back. , or the mutants who hate society are trying to ambush, let them solve all of them, and there is no danger along the way.

Since then, the five golden eagles have been given the title of "Guardian Golden Eagles". The villagers regard them as the guardians of the village and automatically supply them with meat on a regular basis.The cousin said no, the golden eagle would go for food by itself. At that time, Tao Liangsheng suddenly discovered that the boyfriend of the cousin was gone, and when he climbed Yunyin Mountain, at least four or five times out of ten times he could see his cousin sitting alone. On the rock next to a pine tree on the top of the mountain, I always look in one direction.

He wondered if that man had left, left like the man he had dated, left his cousin.Only the cousin was left alone.

Once a person is trapped in an emotional quagmire, it is very difficult to get out.

They sat together on that rock, most of the time without saying a word, and sometimes they talked without talking.

On a night when the breeze was blowing but the anxiety caused by the radiation could not be blown away, Tao Liangsheng sat with his cousin for a long time, until he was a little drowsy. His cousin suddenly spoke in a very low voice, so he heard A love story between gray men and upper class men.

My cousin said, "Did I do something wrong? In fact, those things are not a big deal, are they?"

Tao Liangsheng replied: "Love is all selfish."

In fact, he doesn't know what true love is like, he has never really been in love.What he said is the perception of most people.

I just felt that if something happened to that man, my cousin would regret it too much.There is not much emotional problem between them, in fact they love each other, it's just that there is not enough spiritual communication between them, but they are separated by accident, which is a cruel and sad thing.

He hoped that the man would come back.He can't have love himself, but he hopes that his cousin can get the love of that man.

Tao Liangsheng didn't know why his cousin chose himself as the person to confide in, but he thanked his cousin for giving him this trust.

"If I can find him, no matter what he becomes, I will never let him go." Eleven said.

◇◆◇◆◇◆◇

Eleven reached out to caress Yan Changnian's face, but Yan Changnian wanted to avoid it, so he held his arm.

"At the beginning, you told me that no matter whether you are poor or rich, healthy or sick, you must always be loyal to each other. You forgot, and I will tell you now. Don't push me away." Eleven looked at him, "We are Mate, let me take a good look at you."

As if afraid of touching him, his fingers fell on his injured face very lightly, like feathers.

Yan Changnian's eyes flickered, he was very uncomfortable, but he was unexpectedly obsessed with the feeling of being touched by him. The warm fingers soothed his body that had suffered from pain; and the deep male voice also warmed his desolate and cold heart like a trickling warm current.

"It's my fault, I shouldn't be so selfish." Eleven murmured: "Since you disappeared, we have searched many places, for a long time, but we haven't found you... I caused you to become like this ,It is my fault……"

Eleven said, "Ah Nian, I want you to hug me." He took his hand and let him hug his waist, and then hugged him with strength to integrate him with himself.

Eleven yelled in Yan Changnian's ear over and over again: "A Nian, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry..."

He cried.

Yan Changnian could clearly feel how his tears slid over his skin, carrying a burning temperature.

Yan Changnian put his arms around his shoulders, unable to speak, he reached out to wipe his tears.

Such a strong-looking man, crying like a child in front of him, made his heart tremble.

【it's not your fault. 】Yan Changnian's voice suddenly sounded in Eleven Sea of ​​Consciousness. Just now, in desperation, both of them forgot that they were both cultivators and could use sound transmission to communicate, 【It's not your fault.Don't take other people's faults onto yourself.That Taoist priest is dead, completely dead, and his soul will never be reborn. I have avenged myself. 】Eleven kept shaking his head, he hugged his lost lover tightly, never wanting to let go.

【I am like this temporarily, and I will be able to return to my original state after a while.Do not be sad. 】Yan Changnian patted his head, as if comforting a child.

Eleven sniffed, and gave him the response of stroking the scars on his back and gently kissing the ugly scars on his face: "No matter what you become, I love you the same. I always wondered what happened to you I am afraid that you will never come back—you clearly said that you would come back in two days, but it has been delayed until now—if I receive your dead letter someday, I want to follow you. Without you, everything It doesn't make sense to me."

[Say something stupid. 】Yan Changnian said this, but couldn't help showing a smile. It is a great happiness to have someone who loves him wholeheartedly. He is glad that he met Ning An and came here with Ning An, otherwise he would not know When will we be able to meet again, and this man will continue to bear the blame and suffering of his conscience.

"What happened to you? At that time, it was very painful, right? If possible, I really want to bear it for you..." Eleven's voice was a little choked up.

【Actually, it’s nothing. I thought it was quite hard at the time, but now it seems that it might not be a good thing. It’s a blessing in disguise. 】Yan Changnian didn't want to talk about that experience, 【Tell me about my past. 】