summer like smoke

Lin Yan originally thought that he would drown in the boundless yearning for Xia Zhaoshi in the coming days, the long night was long and the loneliness was unbearable, but a sudden trifle caught him off guard and he had no time to take care of it.

Little Adrian is sick.

The first symptom was that he didn't want to eat all day long. Lin Yan was so worried that he didn't even play games, so he just stayed in the house all day long and took good care of him.As a result, after taking such meticulous care for a week, the condition of little Adrian not only did not improve, but actually became more and more serious. In the end, it turned into a state of being unable to eat at all and falling into a coma, such a half-dead state!Lin Yan was so anxious that he hurriedly called the professional arctic fox breeder that Xia Zhaoshi had hired to come and see him. As soon as he called, the man was so mad at Lin Yan that he told him in a daze that he was currently in the Maldives vacation!

Lin Yan hugged Adrian in his arms and became anxious on the spot. He couldn't help himself, and roared a swear word and rushed over: "Damn it! Why are you so fucking unprofessional and unethical! Run away in half!?"

But the man's answer made Lin Yan instantly dumbfounded: "Ah? What? No, no... Mr. Xia had already paid all the employment fees for the past few months before he left, and told me not to worry about it. Anyway, he won't be able to return to the country in a short time, so I left. No, otherwise I am a small breeder, how dare I do this. Offending Mr. Xia is no fun."

"..."

In the end, until the person hung up the phone tremblingly, Lin Yan held the phone with a dull expression, still unable to recover.The busy tone that came to my ears was beeping, like thunder roaring from afar, unprecedentedly harsh and unpleasant.

I see... Haha, I see.

Lin Yan suddenly thought of the conversation between the two of them when Xia Zhaoshi brought little Adrian back to him:

【I gave it to you, don't raise it to death】

【ah?Hmm... Then, what if I accidentally raise him to death? 】

【It doesn't matter, as long as you can feed this little thing for half a month longer than the golden python before, that's fine】

As long as you can support little Adrian to exceed the half-month record of the golden python that Wang Yuanshan gave you before, that's fine.

I see.In the end, it was true.

Xia Zhaoshi, you are so heartless.

Lin Yan threw away the phone and gritted his teeth. He folded his arms and hugged a sleepy little thing in his arms even tighter. His movements were light and cautious, as if he was afraid of hurting it. He seemed to be really hugging with tenderness and pity. Like your own child.

It's okay, it's okay, good son, Lin Yan said silently in his heart, your bastard father doesn't want you, but daddy will never give up on you.Be good, Daddy will take you to see a doctor right away, you have to persevere, do you hear me?Daddy will take you there now, I will take you there now.You have to be obedient, and even better, okay?Listen to Daddy, okay?

Lin Yan thought about it, and gradually felt that the eye sockets were a little uncontrollably moist and uncontrollably hot.

He said that he likes and cherishes everything Xia Zhaoshi gave him.What's more, one person and one fox have been together for so long... People are not grass and trees, so how can they be ruthless.

And as for Xia Zhaoshi - he is not a human being, he is a demon.

So, on a late night in December in S city, the sky was full of goose feather snow, Lin Yan put on a thick woolen coat, wrapped the little guy tightly in his arms, and walked out in such a hurry. out the door.

He was so afraid of the cold, but at that moment, he was even more afraid of the baby in his arms becoming cold.

Looking back many years later, in my memory, the snow that night was really, really heavy, and the road that night was really special and long.

The snow was so deep that it was difficult to drive, and finally arrived at the veterinary hospital. Lin Yan rushed in like a bandit leader and a villainous warlord in a whirlwind, and hugged little Adrian to the veterinarian without any explanation. After a while, he begged hard and tried everything. His eyes were red and swollen, and his face was flushed with cold. Although his facial features were beautiful, his expression was extremely cruel and terrifying. He grabbed the veterinarian by the collar and shouted that Adrian must be cured. , or he will tear down the hospital.

The two veterinarians on duty were terrified.That's right, only doctors who treat people are qualified to encounter this kind of battle. Where have their veterinarians seen it before? They were basically dumbfounded on the spot.

Little Adrian was finally brought back from a near-death situation.The constant anxiety and worry combined with the meticulous care made Lin Yan lose a lot of weight.He was originally thin, once so thin that the bones could be clearly seen, but now he is so thin that the whole body seems to have only the bones left.

And the primary school students' work and rest time, which was ridiculed by countless people, was completely disrupted.

It's ridiculous, he has never disrupted his unshakable primary school routine for anyone before, but now, because of a little fox, a pet that Xia Zhaoshi gave him, he is willing to work hard and violate the disruption.

If his former bedmates found out about this, they would have to vomit to death.

When little Adrian's situation basically stabilized, it was almost the end of December, Christmas time.Lin Yanhao threw a large sum of money to one of the veterinarians he trusted, half begging and half threatening to ask him to help take good care of little Adrian, while he simply packed a few pieces of luggage, wrapped up like a bear, Soon flew to Philadelphia.

No one knows, Lin Yan himself also hides it very well: every night when he is so worried and heartbroken, he misses him like crazy and can't fall asleep.

Lin Yan doesn't go abroad very often, because he can't stand the long flight process, which is closed, cramped, uninteresting, and boring—it is really a big torture for Lin Yan, who has always loved the excitement.

He didn't realize that he already had a lot of habits in him. He never even thought that one day it would change, he thought it would never change, and he firmly believed in the habits and habits that would never change. But now, he is doing it for Xia Zhaoshi. , silently and unintentionally changed.

The power of emotion is subtle.Let a person become more and more like the other person, and eventually forget what he looks like.

Sleeping as soon as he got on the plane, Lin Yan continued his old habit that he had maintained for many years.In fact, Lin Yan really hoped that this time he could wake up and open his eyes to be told that he had arrived at his destination.But the flight time of more than ten hours is still too long after all. After sleeping for about eight or nine hours, Lin Yan has already started to become unconscious and wake up from time to time, and there are some signs and signs of waking up; however What really woke him up was a passenger sitting beside him.

"Hey, hello, sir, sir... It's lunch time, you'd better get up and eat something before going to sleep."

Lin Yan was woken up from his sleep by such a nosy, idle person who was so idle.

Blinking his eyelids and slowly opening his eyes, Lin Yan frowned and pulled off the blindfold impatiently, turning his head to look at the idler beside him who didn't know what to do, but couldn't help being surprised that the idler was beyond his expectation nice.

Long eyebrows and thin eyes, high nose and thin lips, soft but deep contours—like Xia Zhaoshi, he belongs to the typical type of oriental handsome man.The only difference is temperament, the kind of temperament that emanates from top to bottom and from the inside out.What Xia Zhaoshi wore in a suit looked rigorous and serious, cold and abstinent, while the man in front of him felt suave and cynical.

Xia Zhaoshi smiled, but in his heart he rejected people thousands of miles away, but the person in front of him smiled, but his heart was really open to you.

The reason why Lin Yan knew and was so sure was because of his intuition.He has always been good at seeing people. Except for Li Weizhe and Xia Zhaoshi in this life, one of them is hidden too well, and the other is a terrifying man who is extremely deep. For any of the others, he can pat his chest and say with a clear conscience that he is absolutely , did not miss it.

The man smiled at Lin Yan in an extremely friendly manner, stretched out his hand and handed Lin Yan the lunch he had ordered for Lin Yan from the flight attendant just now, smiled and said gently: "Hello, because I am a doctor, look at your face It’s really bad, that’s why I took the initiative to help you order something. Don’t be angry, get up and eat something first. I really think there may be something wrong with your body. After a while, you will get off the plane and arrive in Philadelphia. I suggest You'd better not be in a hurry to do other things, it is more important to find a hospital to have a detailed physical examination. Believe me, as a doctor, this is my professional opinion, and there is nothing wrong with it."

When Lin Yan heard the words "there may be some problems with the body", Lin Yan retracted his fingers unconsciously, and panic flashed in his eyes.

He was indeed hungry, and he was groggy and half awake just now. To be honest, a large part of the reason was caused by his empty stomach and rumbling intestines.But even so, Lin Yan just lazily raised his eyebrows and glanced casually at the half-opened lunch box in the man's hand, and then immediately turned his head away with a look of disgust, and looked down from the small bag he was carrying. He found a box of mung bean cakes and pure milk that he had prepared for a long time ago, tore open the package and inserted a straw, and licked and ate and drank like a cat, with a serious and focused expression, and no pretentious movements, occasionally poking out tender and tender milk. The tip of her light pink tongue licked the residue remaining on the tips of her fingers and the corners of her mouth, her appearance was so cute as hell.

The man looked at Lin Yan's behavior in silence for a moment and then laughed. He withdrew his hand and beckoned the flight attendant to take away the box of unpalatable lunch that was so despised by the beauty. Suddenly he sighed with great emotion: "You are the second most beautiful person I have ever met in my life, no matter male or female."

Lin Yan was taken aback for a moment, paused for a moment while eating, and then stopped quickly.He is actually not a narcissist, but with all this, Zhang Lian himself has to admit that he has lived for more than 20 or almost 30 years with a peerless face that is almost too beautiful. "Praise" in front of him, saying, "You are me, you are only me, among all the people I have met in this life, regardless of gender, the "second"...is actually only the "second", beautiful people──such a bastard Words! ?

Surprise is inevitable.Although Lin Yan in the past might not care about it, didn't care, didn't care, or even didn't notice it at all, but now...now, it's different.The person he was going to meet at this moment was not someone else, but Xia Zhaoshi.It was the man he was using his life and his pride to turn the tide, desperately trying to win, the man he liked.

In addition, the person next to him said to himself sincerely and professionally, "Your complexion looks really bad." Lin Yan couldn't help but panic when he thought of this, and he was in no mood to eat anymore He threw down the food in his hands in a hurry, then quickly lowered his head, took out his mobile phone from his bag, turned it into selfie mode, and looked in the mirror. Is my complexion really that bad? Is it already that ugly? I can only rank second!?"

"..." The man was embarrassed for a moment, with black lines all over his forehead and cold sweat on the back of his head, he explained in a very speechless manner, "Ugly... this word... Uh, how could you think of using this word to describe yourself. You If it is ugly, then there is no beauty in this world. Cough, well, don’t get me wrong, I mean that Xi Shi is in the eye of the beholder, the most beautiful person in my heart, in fact, no matter what that person looks like, but of course only It could be the person I like," paused for a few seconds, suddenly thought of something, and immediately added, "Of course, although I said so, but don't get me wrong that the person I like is actually ugly Ah, in fact, he is also a well-deserved beauty."

When talking about "the person I like", all the suave, suave and cynical aspects of this person's body have suddenly become unbelievably affectionate and affectionate.

Lin Yan couldn't help being in a daze when he heard this, and the embarrassment of being seen through suddenly eased a bit, silently put away the phone, lowered his head and continued to eat, and stopped talking.

For the next half of the journey, Lin Yan spent the rest of the day sleeping and waking up and having occasional conversations with the other party.

It wasn't too difficult.

The plane arrived at Philadelphia International Airport on time at [-]:[-] p.m. Lin Yan buttoned up his coat, wrapped up a scarf, put on a hat, put on gloves and put on a mask, and appeared in the airport lobby fully armed.It's freezing cold in Philadelphia at the end of December.But Lin Yan was afraid of the cold.

Wearing thick gloves with dexterous fingers, he took out the phone from the bag and quickly dialed the phone that he had already memorized, and how many times he had been dreaming about it since these days. Numbers, familiarize yourself with numbers.After a short and long wait, it was suffocatingly connected.

"Hello," Lin Yan said as soon as he heard the noise over there, "I'm at the Philadelphia airport right now, come pick me up."

After finishing speaking, he quickly hung up with a snap, without giving Xia Zhaoshi any rebuttal, or even just a chance to speak.

Of course he wanted to hear Xia Zhaoshi's voice, he wanted to die, he wanted to die, but he was afraid, even more afraid, what Xia Zhaoshi would say would make him heartbroken, and he wanted to turn around and leave.

For a lazy person like him, it is rare for him to go out of the country once and take such a long flight, so he doesn't want to just go around for nothing and return empty-handed.

Lin Yan randomly found an empty seat and sat down, with a dazed expression, not knowing what he was thinking.After an unknown amount of time passed, the mobile phone that Lin Yan was still holding tightly in his hand suddenly vibrated, finally dragging Lin Yan back to reality from the daze.Lin Yan was taken aback, and hurriedly forgot to check the caller ID on the screen, so he hurriedly picked it up: "...Hello?"

He thought that this call was from Xia Zhaoshi who wanted to ruthlessly shoo him away, but he didn't expect that for him, the other end of the phone at this moment would be someone who was more cruel than Xia Zhaoshi. A ten thousand times more terrifying existence.

What sounded next to my ear was a cold female voice that sounded polite, respectful and gentle at first, but because of what she said next, it seemed even more ruthless and chilling: "Mr. Lin, I'm sorry to bother you, I'm A doctor from the Third Military Hospital in S City. It’s like this. You have been undergoing regular physical examinations in our hospital. Your condition was normal before, but last month it seems that there was a little problem. Because you used to deliberately I told us to notify you immediately if there is anything wrong with your physical condition. Well, so when, can you come to the hospital conveniently?"

"..."

A burst of dizziness.At that moment, Lin Yan felt that all the strength in his body was taken away by the female doctor on the other end of the phone.

"Yeah... what's the problem?" For a long while, he was in a trance, heard it but didn't know it, conscious without realizing it, and made a sound by himself.

"Uh," the female doctor on the other end of the phone seemed to be in a bit of a dilemma. After considering her words for a long time, she said carefully, "It shouldn't be a big problem. Don't worry. We'll wait until you come to the hospital in person."

Lin Yan was silent, and after a few seconds passed, he suddenly blurted out softly, his voice was as deep as the dark clouds in the sky before a summer thunderstorm, so depressing and desperate, so suffocating: "Is it... related to blood?"

He is not without feeling, his own body, he knows it himself.Recently, dizziness, dark eyes, drowsiness and drowsiness have become more and more frequent, and more and more serious... What happened to his mother back then, he can clearly remember it, and it is unforgettable.

It turned out that he still hadn't escaped.It's really pitiful for the sinful virtue accumulated in vain for so many years.

"Eh!?"

The female doctor couldn't hold back when she heard it, let out a small exclamation, and stammered incoherently: "What, what? You, how did you know...uh──" When I said this, I was stunned for a moment, and I knew that I would I couldn't hide it and there was no need to hide it. After thinking about it, I sighed and admitted it generously.The tone was regretful and sad, filled with a kind of sympathy and helplessness unique to women, "Hey, yes. The last examination showed that your hematopoietic tissue...hematopoietic stem cells may be...well, it seems, there is a little abnormality .”

Lin Yan slowly closed her eyes, her slightly trembling eyelashes were like butterflies that could no longer fly in the rainstorm.So beautiful, but in the end, it is no match for the wind and rain.

"Thank you," he said lightly, his voice was so far away that it seemed to come from another world, "I will come to the hospital as soon as possible, please. Goodbye."

Snapped.As soon as Lin Yan finished speaking, he quickly hung up the phone.Don't want to hear anything else.Regret and helplessness, sympathy and pity -- these things, please stay away from him, far away.He couldn't bear it, and he didn't want to be reminded.

Xia Zhaoshi was right, he was no longer at his peak.Lin Yan thought.No matter how beautiful he is, he is just a person, and there are too many things that a person can't match, such as fate, God's will, and time.

He is still at the peak, but he fell in love with someone; he is no longer at the peak because he fell in love with someone.

The higher you stand, the harder you fall, and the falling process is so long, it is enough to see and recall clearly.Lin Yan's natural beauty made Lin Yan lose the chance to climb, but God is fair, so when he fell, it made up for him twice because of the warmth and warmth of human nature and the coldness of the world.

The vicissitudes of life.The waves behind the Yangtze River push forward the waves ahead, and a new generation replaces the old ones.There should be new beauties appearing on the altar.He, Lin Yan, has been indomitable and brilliant for so long, he should, and should have left the scene long ago.

However, there are still regrets, but there are still unwillingness.He used to travel thousands of miles across the world of mortals and enjoy the prosperity of the three thousand years, but the moment he faded away, no one was by his side, accompanying him.

No one, because he is too proud, because he is self-willed.He doesn't want others, all he wants is the person he likes.

The person I like doesn't like me──That feeling, really, really, is so lonely.

And he was so lonely for ten years.Although I changed people halfway, the loneliness remained unchanged.

At that moment, Lin Yan suddenly felt that since his mother left, he had tirelessly accumulated so-called evil virtues for so many years according to his instructions, but now it seems that it is just a pale and weak joke.

useless.Even though things in the world are unpredictable, in the dark, the ending has long been doomed.What kind of stupid and shameless creatures are human beings? How can they be so arrogant and arrogant while being so small and incompetent.I always like to say big things about things that make people conquer nature, but in the end, nothing at all can be changed.

For an unknown period of time, Lin Yan seemed to be standing in the landslide, the earth was cracked, the wind was turbulent, the world was raining and the world was boundless, just letting his thoughts run wild, his heart and soul were unbearably wet.

He didn't cry, and there was no excess rain in his body, which could flow out of his eyes.So his body flooded and swelled, converging into a vast ocean.A heart is like a lone boat and a leaf, riddled with holes and scars, wandering alone in the boundless and choppy sea, swaying with the waves.

The only lighthouse that guides home in the darkness shines in death.

Footsteps gradually sounded ahead, and finally stopped straight in front of Lin Yan.

"So you are really Lin Yan, the famous Lin Yan." Sure enough, the subtle tone of complaining was the very familiar clear male voice, "Well, I saw you a long time ago." I should have thought of it at the first glance. With such a face that is all over the country, although it looks a little haggard, but the facial features are really amazing. No wonder that guy Adrian would treat me as his for you. My subordinates ordered me to drive me halfway, but when he called, my old friend who had been away for a few years didn't even say hello first, and then angrily insisted that I come back to pick you up... It's a typical heavy A bastard with a flirty friend... Hey, let's go, Miss Lin, I'll take you to Xia's house right now."

The world is sometimes said to be big, but it is also really small.Lin Yan withdrew his mind to hide his expression, and slowly raised his head.

The man in front of him smiled as sincerely and friendly as he was on the plane, and stretched out his right hand to himself: "Oh, by the way, I haven't introduced myself to you for a long time, right? Hello, my name is Su Yuwei. Yu, dangerous danger," paused, then shrugged self-deprecatingly, "how about it, it's an interesting name."

Lin Yan shook the other party politely, and bluntly said: "Your parents don't like you, why would they give you such an unlucky name."

Su Yuwei smiled meaninglessly: "Yes, Xiaosan's illegitimate child will of course bring danger to the family."

Lin Yan let out a faint oh, and stopped talking.Everyone has everyone's chores, and he's not interested.

After getting in the car and just putting on the seat belt, Su Yuwei turned his head to look at Lin Yan's face again, and immediately couldn't help frowning: "Hey, let me say, why don't we follow the advice I just gave you on the plane?" As you said, find a hospital to check your body first, I see that your face is really..."

"No need," Lin Yan simply interrupted, "I know my own body."

He lowered his eyes and smiled softly: "For the time being, I can't die yet."

"..." Su Yuwei had nothing to say.Shrug your shoulders, curl your lips, start, drive.

In fact, Lin Yan did not tell lies.He was too, and he couldn't die for the time being.And even if he was going to die, he would use his remaining two-thirds of his life to defeat Xia Zhaoshi before he died.

He is not some saint, nor is he great.Now that every little bit of hard work has been done, all the sinful virtues accumulated for half a lifetime have been reduced to nothing... Now that he is going to die, he hopes, he prays, that those who loved him and those he loved will live forever after his death. No love, no happiness.

In his bones, he was the same as his mother, with those desperate genes and crazy thoughts.He wanted Xia Zhaoshi to remember him forever, forever.For the rest of his life, for the rest of his life, he will only remember him as Lin Yan, and he will never love anyone else, and will never look down on others.

He has never been a good person. He has tortured and tortured too many people in his life, intentionally or unintentionally.Anyway, I can't go to heaven anymore, so instead of being a lonely ghost wandering in the world with boundless desolation, it's better to go to hell.