cheongsam boy

Bulimia?

This made Gu Zhuo stunned for a moment, and at this moment, the scene of the three meeting each other in the daytime flashed back before his eyes at the same time.

Vaguely, he seemed to remember hearing the words bulimia in the conversation.

As smart as he is, without Song Rin's detailed explanation, Gu Zhuo quickly reacted, and he gave Song Rin's hairy hand a beat: "Does he have bulimia?"

Song Rin responded with a hmm, and at the same time, her eyes were full of sadness and unbearable: "I didn't expect that it has been so long, Ji Nan is still not well, and even worse than before, obviously...Obviously before I left France , he has come out of the control treatment center."

Hearing what Song Rin said, Gu Zhuo recalled the appearance of Ji Nan when he saw him today. He was a very thin child. Looking at his appearance alone, he would not be connected with the word gluttony at all, but rather anorexia.

Gu Zhuo was a little puzzled. Just as he was thinking, Song Rin seemed to see through his doubts, and wrapped his arms around his neck tightly: "He is very thin, right, and there is no sign of overeating at all."

Gu Zhuo leaned back on a pillow, put Song Rin's waist around, and leaned back with his arms: "Too thin, like anorexia, or malnutrition."

Song Rin closed his eyes and hummed: "When I first saw him, he was thinner than this, really the kind with only a handful of bones left. Like you, I think he should be anorexic or Malnourished, but then I learned that he was bulimia, bulimia with vomiting."

"Induce vomiting?" Gu Zhuo was stunned, "You mean, after he ate it, he spit it out again?"

"Yes," Song Rin's low brows were stained with sadness and helplessness, "I... saw that scene once, it was so cruel and terrible, he didn't use any tools, just used his hands... just..."

At the end, Song Rin didn't know what to recall, his expression was tangled, very painful and complicated, and his voice began to choke.

Seeing that he was not in the right state, Gu Zhuo hurriedly patted him on the back, and changed the subject: "Don't think about it, don't think about it. Then why did he come to the psychiatric department this time? What did his mother say?"

"He came here for psychological intervention." With Gu Zhuo's reassurance, Song Rin quickly calmed down, and he attached himself to Gu Zhuo wholeheartedly, "His mother came here with him, but we didn't meet this time."

Hearing that he was accompanied by his family, Gu Zhuo heaved a sigh of relief, and he asked patiently, "Then do you want to go see him?"

"I want to go, but his mother said that he is in a bad state and may not want to see people for the time being." Song Rin's voice was a little depressed and muffled, rubbing against Gu Zhuo's movements, as if she was acting like a baby, "But she said it for a while Ji Nan will return to China, I can contact you and try again."

"Okay," Gu Zhuo said, "If we get in touch, I'll go there with you."

This is the answer Song Rin wanted.

understanding, companionship and support.

It's just that he asked for it in a different way, and Gu Zhuo was able to find Song Rin's most real needs in the seemingly ordinary conversation, setting aside the examples used as a cover, and then unconditionally give everything in the long-flowing life.

In relationships, whether it is Qiao Heng or her ex-boyfriend, Song Rin has never thought of taking a gamble, probing once, or crossing the boundary once, but only when he met Gu Zhuo, he began to have this urge.

But fortunately, he was right in his bet, and it was rare for him to be right in impulsiveness.

How fortunate, he was able to not taste the taste of regret after the impulse passed.

Song Rin wiped his tears on his shoulders, as if he had made some important decision, he got up resolutely and got out of bed, and found a thick stack of medical records in the innermost compartment of the closet, as well as a pack of medical records in plastic bags. medicine jars.

The case is thick and there are many medicine jars.

Under the warm yellow light, in the blending of the two people's experience, and in the astonishment of Gu Zhuo, Song Rin handed them all to Gu Zhuo.

Song Rin retracted into Gu Zhuo's arms again, listening to the sound of flipping paper behind her, said in a low voice: "This year is the No. 11 year since I was diagnosed, from mild to severe, every time I go alone, Whether it’s taking medicine, changing doctors, or doing brain CT, I’m all alone.”

"Gu Zhuo, I don't like to go to the hospital, I don't like to have brain CT, I don't like to take medicine, and I don't like to be alone. But after thinking about it, I can accept it if you are with me."

At this time, Song Rin has removed all his disguises. He is no longer the Chief Song that everyone is satisfied and envious of. He is just a child who yearns to be loved and understood.

Gu Zhuo touched the line of his waist, feeling soft and sore in his heart. He closed the case and put it on the bedside table together with the medicine.

Then he promised: "I won't be alone anymore. I will accompany you to the hospital, I will communicate with the doctor, and I will pack the medicine for you every day, and supervise you to take it. If you feel uncomfortable during the adaptation period, I will treat you Hold me by my side to accompany you through, in short, I won't let you alone again. Don't worry, leave all the unhappy things to me, and you will be a carefree, thoughtless child."

"Okay," Song Lin raised his head and responded quickly. He looked at Gu Zhuo with a smile and asked, "Then do you mind if your child wears a small skirt?"

"I don't mind, on the contrary, I like it very much, not as a kind of interest, but for yourself." Gu Zhuo lowered his head and pecked Song Lin's lips, "My chief Song, I only care about everything that makes you unhappy. Everything that makes you not love me, other than that, you can do whatever you want, whoever you want to be."

Speaking of this, Gu Zhuo somehow suddenly remembered the unfinished confession that day, he hugged Song Rin tightly, and said nervously: "Do you remember that day in the design office in Beijing?"

The scene that day was so unforgettable that it was hard for Song Rin to forget it.

When mentioning that day, Song Rin's face was a bit complicated. He first said in a low voice that he remembered, and then hugged Gu Zhuo tightly: "I'm sorry, sorry, I was really scared at the time. I haven't told anyone about it for so many years. No one knows, I..."

"It's okay, it's okay, I understand, don't be afraid baby. I have my own problems, and I shouldn't just let you say it without any mental preparation," Gu Zhuo patted him on the back to comfort him, "But that's all in the past , now I just want to say that what I said at the time is still valid. As long as you want, I can make cheongsam for you to wear every day, not only cheongsam, I can also learn to make all kinds of skirts, as long as you like Yes, I can learn and do it.”

Gu Zhuo's words followed his comforting movements, one by one, like a warm ocean flowing over his body. Song Rin was surrounded and soaked in love like water and fire. At this moment, what kind of bullshit rationality collapsed in an instant, leaving only such A surge of sensibility.

After so many years, he can finally not be alone, and finally have someone who is his home, his safe haven.

The emotions, grievances, and dissatisfaction that have been suppressed all year round found an outlet in Gu Zhuo's simple words.

Song Rin's arched back twitched a few times, and he grabbed Gu Zhuo's collar hand, tightening and loosening it, and finally when he grasped it for the last time, his emotions spewed out along with tears, and he was relieved.

"I'm scared, I'm really scared, Gu Zhuo, I don't know why I became like this, I just want to be like ordinary people, I don't want to see those disappointed and disgusted eyes because of these abnormalities. I don't want to suffer from depression, I don't want to like the same sex, and I don't want to like wearing skirts..."

"Why don't you want to?" Gu Zhuo was puzzled. He pulled Song Rin out of his arms, wiped his tears, and said, "Suffering from depression, liking the same sex, and wearing women's clothes and skirts, what's wrong with that?" ?”

Song Rin's emotions are exploding, and her thoughts are gradually becoming chaotic: "I know this is true, and I also understand a lot of truths. I understand that it is only once in this life that people want to live out themselves, but Gu Zhuo, I do No, I can't do nothing, I can't get rid of the worldly eyes, I... I'm cowardly, that's why I fall into this damn emotion and torture myself."

In fact, what Song Rin said is not unreasonable. At their age, they have actually experienced everything they need to experience and understand everything they need to understand, but people are often sad about their own psychological and emotional hurdles.

Gu Zhuo actually has a lot to say, but he also understands that Song Rin doesn't need comfort at this time, he just needs an outlet to vent his emotions, someone who can accompany him and listen to him vent.

So Gu Zhuo didn't answer, but just wiped away Song Rin's tears and listened to his cries of confused thoughts and language.

"I was really scared, you know, when I came out to them, the way they looked at me changed completely after that, and my mother didn't like me anymore... no, she didn't like me when she was a kid, she and My dad didn't like me after the divorce, I know it all, she thinks I'm a burden, a symbol of her past failures in life, but I still love her very much, I have done so much to please her, but she still doesn't like it I."

"When the psychiatrist asked me if my parents' divorce had any effect on me, I said no, but in fact I knew very well that it did. I am home, nowhere is my home...I really hate this damn world, I also think about how to die every day, but I am too cowardly, too cowardly..."

"I understand myself too well. In fact, what Master Du Chan said that day is all right. I know the root cause, but I don't want to solve it. I set up my own cage. My cage is set by myself. Every time depression breaks out, I know what the breaking point is, but I just can't get out, and I can't get out... I'm just a monster, just abnormal... Gu Zhuo, can you help me, please help me, help me get out , I am in too much pain."

Song Lin babbled and talked a lot, delirious and confused, until finally crying out of breath, she grabbed Gu Zhuo by the collar and raised her face wet with tears to ask for help.

His crying voice was hoarse, and he took a big breath every time he said a word, like a mermaid who was stranded and dying, beautiful and fragile, lovable and distressing.

Gu Zhuo hugged him and turned over, while turning his hands to dim the light, he kissed away the tears on his face: "Okay, I'll help you, the next time it erupts, you tell me, I'll help you get out, and I won't let you out." You are overwhelmed by emotions, and they will never let you suffer."

Song Rin was gently placed on the bed. He looked up at the ceiling through tears. The blockage in his nose made him feel suffocated for a moment. It was the kind of suffocation that he felt when he was strangled after running a marathon for more than ten kilometers. .

But in the next second, the warm touch followed the tears, stripping him from the breathless space and dragging him back to the light-filled world.

Song Rin's mind is still confused, but he is very clear about what he wants now, just like a drug addict who is high on drugs, or a drunkard who is drunk and crazy, in the excitement and confusion, he can still understand what he wants Thirst for something.

— Craving for the root of that addiction.

Song Rin raised her head and took a deep breath, then grabbed Gu Zhuo's neck, turned over and sat back on him again.

He was still crying, and the tears couldn't stop flowing, but the sadness was gradually being healed and faded.

Song Rin lowered her head, watching her tears hit Gu Zhuo's eyelids, under the light, drop by drop, as if inlaid with broken diamonds on Gu Zhuo's eyelids.

Psychedelic wonderful.

Song Rin smiled, and before Gu Zhuo could speak, she put her fingers into Gu Zhuo's mouth, and said in a wry voice, "Gu Zhuo, you have my tears hanging on your eyelashes, so fucking sexy."

Speaking of this, Song Rin didn't know what to think of, and while vigorously attacking Gu Zhuo's mouth, he laughed and cried: "Do you know, the first time you measured me was when you squatted in front of me, That scene... I reacted directly, same as this time, so sexy, so sexy...I want to dirty your glasses."

This is the second time that Gu Zhuo has seen Song Rin like this, he is completely different from the usual coldness, every inch of the line is full of drugs that seduce people crazy.

In fact, Gu Zhuo also understands that this is dementia after an emotional outburst, and everything Song Rin does and says now is not sober.

But this kind of dementia can only be seen by Gu Zhuo, and only he can see Song Rin who was seduced by Daji.

Gu Zhuo was instantly in a good mood. He swung his tongue around Song Rin's fingertips, and then took advantage of his unpreparedness and lightly bit it.

Song Rin withdrew his hand in pain, his grievance came up at once, but just as he was about to complain, he suddenly found that Gu Zhuo had found his pair of gold chain glasses from nowhere and put them on the bridge of his nose superior.

It's sexier.

While Song Rin was still in a daze, Gu Zhuo had already moved. He grabbed Song Rin's coat buttons, pulled him down, and approached him wearing glasses, whispering.

"Aren't you going to get dirty, then come on."

Then let's go crazy together, be demented together, hallucinate together, and be hyperactive together.

The gold chain swayed as the head swayed, illuminated by the light, casting a dim shadow on the wall, swinging from side to side, like painting on the wall.

After a painting is exhausted, the paint is finally opened and sprayed onto the gold chain and lens to complete the last stroke.

But this was just the beginning, Gu Zhuo immediately transferred the canvas to Song Rin's body, felt the size, conceived the spring scene, and then re-started, filled in the color, and finally completed the signature.

Song Rin, who is a canvas, has been filled with color several times, and when the painting is finally finished, there is no blank space on his body to paint again.

Gu Zhuo was very satisfied with his results. After he was framed and arranged, he walked into the living room with his mobile phone.

With the sound of the lighter, the phone was dialed out, and when the flames licked the tail of the cigarette, the other end of the phone was connected.

A deep male voice came: "What's the matter?"

Hearing this unwavering voice, Gu Zhuo chuckled lightly with a cigarette in his mouth: "Bian Yan, I want you to do me a favor. Send me your Li Juan's contact information. I'll ask her something."

The author has something to say: Huh, this is finally the end of the story, and it’s almost over. This journey of writing is more difficult than I imagined. I also thought about cutting the outline in the middle, but this is not only irresponsible to you, It is also irresponsible for this story and the inspiration behind this story. At least I promised them to write it completely.Fortunately, I persisted, otherwise I would be a bad person who repented and cheated again.

There is a linkage in the back, you know which pair it is, this is for the main line service, the plot development service, not to bring another book.As for the three pairs, uh, you also know that my writing skills are rubbish, and the three pairs are really a bit out of control, and it may involve spoilers, so my consideration is, should I have a sick episode, or I Try writing a few small clips on Weibo?

Let’s read it when the time comes. I will try to update this book from today, at least before the end of the year, because I have plans to go to a hospital or a temple after the next year. It may really be worse by then, and it will be worse than the original if I am sick. The date is delayed, sorry.

Thank you for your support and likes, it is really not easy to see here, thank you very much.Take a bow and thank you.

47. Goose crown red