hate farewell thirteen

That day Zhou Ru played the pipa very slowly, she played it carefully, tilting her head to look at her fingertips, but she didn't look at Song Shuman.

Song Shuman stood in front of her, and if the song played in front of her was the last song she saw, she would record it frame by frame in her mind and remember it for the rest of her life.

After Zhou Ru stopped moving, Song Shuman said, "Do you remember that I told you before that when you played the pipa, you most resembled the name Song Shuman?"

"Actually, it's not that you are not like me, it's that I am to you."

Zhou Ru couldn't understand her nonsense, "You are you, I am me, there are so many similarities."

Song Shuman felt a little downcast when she heard this. She thought more about how they could be confused, and how much their names were bound together. She wanted to explain her feelings to her.

But she didn't, she didn't dare, she could only disassemble the words carefully and hide the love in the homophony.

Song Shuman didn't know when she first fell in love with Zhou Ru. Was it the hand she held when she met her for the first time, was it the hair falling from her ears when she played the pipa, or was she protecting herself behind her regardless of others?It's just that at this moment, she suddenly understood what she had been thinking about for the past few days, and realized what was on her mind.

"Zhou Ru, why do you divide me so finely?"

"We are two-way people, how can we confuse them."

Zhou Ru put down the pipa she was holding in her arms, "You have read the article on the moon and the mountain. The day you brought me back to your house, the manuscript was blown to the ground by the wind, so I picked it up and read it. You read it to me that time. , I just listened to the beginning and forbade you to read any further, and you can’t even guess the reason why. It would be too long to explain the reason in detail, but to put it simply, my past is Chunsheng in the story.”

"I think, Qing Mei may have heard my story. At that time, this story was passed around in the streets and alleys. As the story was passed on, it began to be embellished. Three parts are true and seven parts are false. Even the stories written by Qing Mei are not all true. Me. There are rumors that I killed the pipa girl, and others say that I killed the family of the person who killed her. The former troupe master of Liyuan saw that I took pity on me, so I changed my name and stayed here."

Zhou Ru got up and patted the folds of the clothes, put the pipa back to its original place, and turned her back to Song Shuman, "Shuman, I have been living and wandering all my life. I came to this place when I was thirteen. The sister who brought me is a Suzhou girl. I spoke Suzhou dialect and sang Suzhou songs, and I also called her sister and sister behind her, but I had no chance to hear her respond to me again."

"She died because of me. My hands are bloody and unclean. Are you like me? What is my whole body worth? I don't want you to be like me, and I don't want you to have anything to do with me. Shuman, I want you to be good To live, I want you to live a life of peace, joy and completeness.”

"As long as you're not like me, that's fine."

Song Shuman opened her arms and hugged Zhou Ru from behind. She held Zhou Ru's hand tightly, and Song Shuman could feel her sobbing and trembling.

"Those are things in the past, everything is getting better."

Zhou Ru's hand was held by another slender and fair hand, powerful but so helpless, "There are some things that cannot be overcome in a lifetime."

"I just want to be safe in my life, and I don't want anything else."

"Stay away from me from now on, Song Shuman, those who are too close to me will end badly."

"What if I don't?" Song Shuman asked her like this.

Zhou Ru moved Song Shuman's hand away and did not answer Song Shuman's last question. This was the first time she mentioned the past in so many years. She thought she had let go of it long ago, but in fact she never let go.

Song Shuman's appearance was a pebble passing by her calm lake, and the ripples disturbed her original life and dusty memories. She escaped from that dark time living in the abyss for eight years. , don't mention it, it seems to really disappear.

"I'm leaving, Miss Song can take care of herself." Zhou Ru said goodbye to her, but she didn't say goodbye, she didn't want to see goodbye.

Song Shuman was left where she was, and then returned home alone.As soon as she entered the house, her brother's cat came over and kissed her ankle. She bent down and picked up the over-loved and fat orange cat. The cat meowed, scratched her paw, and ran away.

Song Shuman was so angry that she didn't want to show her any favors, just like her sister.She was angry with her sister in her heart, calling her sister that cat, getting close to her and pushing her away.

"Little Orange, Little Orange." Song Shuman yelled, and the little orange cat lay on the stairs on the second floor, ignoring her.

Song Shuman stepped up the stairs, and was about to reach out to hug it, when it screamed and jumped behind Song Chengliang, before Song Shuman could speak, Song Chengliang let go of his voice and shouted: "Father, sister is going to hit Xiaoju!"

Song Shuman frowned slightly, "Hey, you little bastard! What are you talking about every day? Which eye of yours sees that I want to hit it?"

Song Chengliang pointed to the untreated wound on Song Shuman's arm, "Little Orange grabbed you, you are going to hit it."

"In your heart, your sister and I are the ones who hold grudges like this? I love you for nothing, and I feed it for nothing on weekdays. I always don't want to see me."

"Forget it, I see, I should study outside for a few more years and come back. I might as well study for the rest of my life and forget about being outside for the rest of my life."

Song Chengliang hugged his little orange cat and slipped away without saying a word. Song Shuman ate up and went into her room, and it rained again outside the window.

She has never liked anyone before, this is the first time her heart has been led away by someone.But her love has not been revealed on the surface, and people refuse to clean up, wanting to never know her again.Qingmei is right, liking is like rain, how come it rains with just one glance.

Song Chengliang went into his sister's room with the medicine box in his arms. Seeing the tears in the corners of her eyes, he thought it was because of him.

"Sister, I'm sorry, don't stay outside forever, I'll bring Xiaoju here to apologize to you, please stop crying, okay?"

Song Chengliang's apology was so sincere that she couldn't help laughing.Song Shuman wiped her tears with the back of her hand, leaned over and looked at her younger brother, pretending to be serious, "Why don't you knock when you enter someone else's room?"

Song Chengliang ran out of the door without saying a word, closed the door behind him, and knocked twice, "Sister, can I come in?"

Song Shuman didn't want to cry in front of her younger brother, so she casually replied "No."

Song Chengliang waited at the door for a long time that day, until the meal time, Uncle Li went upstairs to call the young lady and master to eat, Song Chengliang was still sitting at the door of his sister, about to fall asleep within a quarter of an hour.

"What are you doing at the door?"

"My sister said no to let in."

"Why do you want to come into my room?"

"I asked Xiaoju to apologize. She was still in my arms just now, and now I'm going to eat."

"Okay, I'm not mad at you and Xiaoju, let's go eat."

Song Shuman was depressed for several days, not because she was angry with anyone, but because she couldn't be happy and stayed alone in the room.Aunt Qin called and said that she would have a rest tomorrow, so she could come to her to get her mother's things.

Song Shuman tidied up and went out to pick some presents. She was too hasty last time, and she was embarrassed to enter someone's house with empty hands.

When I opened the door, I saw a small mountain of candies piled up at the door. I asked Li Bo and found out that it was Song Chengliang who put it.

She only took one of them, and asked Uncle Li to return the rest, "Uncle Li, please help me tell Cheng Liang that if my sister is unhappy, she only needs one candy."

Steward Li called Song Shuman to stop, but hesitated and said nothing, "Miss..."

"Uncle Li, just save some food for me at night, you don't have to wait for me to eat."

Song Shuman went out, looking for gifts all the way, picking and choosing, not knowing what to give, and finally wandered to Qingmei's house.

"Mr. Jiang is not at home, come in."

"You mean you have to drive me away if your husband is at home?"

Xu Qingmei smiled and asked Song Shuman to come in. When she smiled, her almond eyes curved into crescent moons.As soon as Song Shuman entered the door, Qingmei noticed the scars on her hands that had not yet healed, "Why did you hurt your hands?"

"It's the little orange cat at home. I accidentally hurt it. It's okay."

"Last time, students from Jiangli brought back a bunch of ointments from abroad. It seems that there is one for removing scars. I'll find it for you."

"This student is funny, how can he give a bunch of ointments to patients."

"They don't want to get this, Jiang Li is not taboo, and I don't care, it's good to have some medicine at home, maybe one day..."

Song Shuman interrupted Xu Qingmei, "Bah, bah, bah."

Xu Qingmei took Song Shuman's hand into the room, and found the medicine box, which was piled with large and small bottles of western medicine, Qingmei couldn't remember the exact name of the medicine, the name of the western medicine was too long and difficult to pronounce.

She picked up one by one to look at the dense English letters on the box, Song Shuman picked up one of the ointments and asked her, "Is it this one?"

"Let me see." Xu Qingmei took the medicine and looked it over carefully, "It seems to be this one, but I'm not sure, I really can't remember."

"Should I ask Jiang Li when he comes back?"

"Your box of medicine is probably out of date, and you don't know the specific effect. Do you have a pen here? Give me one, and I'll write a rough outline on the box for you."

Song Shuman took the pen, and wrote down the efficacy and administration method on the medicine box one by one. Most of them were just vitamin health care products. The written medicines were arranged in a row on the table. of Chinese herbal medicine.

"Qingmei, are you pregnant?"

"what?"

"Isn't this a miscarriage medicine?"

Qingmei could only nod her head, "I originally planned to tell you after three months."

Song Shuman hurriedly helped Xu Qingmei to sit on the bed, restlessly pressed her small hands against Qingmei's belly, her belly was flat and flat, without any signs of new life.

"I'm just pregnant, and it's not that I can't even walk."

"Then you have to be careful, just be careful."

Qingmei nodded, and put her hand on the back of Song Shuman's, "What's on your mind recently?"

"What can I worry about?"

"What can you hide from me? I don't understand you yet."

"Anyone you like?"

Song Shuman lowered her head and remained silent for a long time. Xu Qingmei said: "The Song Shuman I know is not an awkward and vacillating person. She went out and changed her medical school behind everyone's backs. Why are you hesitating now? ?”

"As expected, nothing can escape your eyes, Xu Qingmei."

Song Shuman sat on the ground according to the situation, with her head resting on Xu Qingmei's thigh, "But I still don't know whether it was the right choice to go to medical school when I got crazy. Just like me now, I can’t tell if I like it or not.”

Xu Qingmei stroked Song Shuman's hair, "You know, when I was in college, I wasn't Jiang Li's student, he was a teacher in the next courtyard. I went to the wrong classroom the first day I went to class, and I was still in the middle of the first row. Sitting, he rolled around and failed to read my name. I raised my hand and asked him, why didn’t he call me? He said that it might be a mistake on the other side of the academic affairs office, and he would write it down for me later.”

"He started to give lectures, and I realized that I made a mistake, and I was embarrassed to run out like this. I stayed until the end of get out of class, and my husband told me later that the voice I explained to him was as quiet as a mosquito, like a ripe red apple. "

"Thinking about it now, the fate between Mr. Jiang and I seems to have been buried very early, and it has been leading all the way to the present."

"Maybe there are right and wrong choices, but there is no right or wrong for liking."