go with the wind

Because of the knock on the door, both Cao Yiran and Bai Shu raised their heads to look at the door.

After Cao Yiran glanced at it, he put his gaze on Bai Shu, and said in a low voice, "Maybe my mother is here."

He thought of the matter that the manager directly sent the keys just now. Seeing that he needed someone to support him, the manager would definitely tell his mother. Treatment, thinking of this, Cao Yiran is very disgusted. In his heart, receiving psychological treatment means that he has a psychological problem, that is, his family treats him as a lunatic, so he is extremely disgusted with this.

Because he said it was his mother, Bai Shu was stunned for a moment, and then said, "What do you want me to do?"

Cao Yiran frowned slightly because of his question, he knew what Bai Shu meant by asking, and Bai Shu knew that he didn't want his mother to know the relationship between the two, so he felt that he should avoid suspicion.

Cao Yiran sat up from the sofa, leaned there, and slightly closed his eyes. His long eyelashes concealed some emotions in his eyes, but it made him look melancholy.

Seeing him like this, Bai Shu felt distressed, and said, "No matter what, I'll satisfy you first."

Cao Yiran watched him open his mouth, but finally agreed with his words wordlessly, and then said, "Don't talk about what happened to me just now, just say that I was drunk and uncomfortable."

Bai Shu nodded.

Just as Bai Shu got up from the sofa, Zhao Yue had already come in. She came in with Zhou Yan, and the manager and female assistant Hou were outside the door.

From Zhou Yan guarding the door, Zhao Yue knew that Cao Yiran and Bai Shu probably had some problems in the room. She could tell whether her son really cared about who her son was. Cao Yiran wanted to cover up his relationship with Bai Shu more and more. The more Yue Yue understood that Cao Yiran's feelings for this white tree were unusual.

Because of the hurt her son received from Ruan Jun when he was a child, Zhao Yue hated homosexuality, especially those with a tendency to pedophile. She donated a lot of money to charity, and the two biggest ones were nursing homes and orphanages. , and once sent a male teacher who molested a student to prison. She is jealous of this kind of person. She hopes to do her best to care for some children, in order to redeem the fault caused by her negligence towards her son back then.

In fact, what she wanted more was to mend the wound in Cao Yiran's heart, but Cao Yiran buried the wound by himself, not allowing anyone to uncover and solve the matter. Regarding matters related to this matter, Cao Yiran must immediately refute excitedly, and she would not be allowed to say any more, and each time she said very fierce words, so that Zhao Yue could no longer ask Cao Yiran to solve this matter.

Zhao Yue knew that his son respected and loved him, but it was only respect and love, and he also closed himself out of his heart.He didn't tell himself his troubles or happy things, he didn't say anything, he just showed affection and obedience to himself in front of himself.

But Zhao Yue knew that she actually hoped that he could tell her what was in his heart.

Although there is such a strong hope, Cao Yiran, who is getting more and more confused and farther away, let her know that this matter is not realistic.

Therefore, she hoped that Cao Yiran could have a woman he likes and get married, maybe after he has a child, everything will be better.

Of course, I hope that Cao Yiran will have a child earlier, because Zhao Yue hopes to make up for what he did to Cao Yiran back then with his child. Moreover, she also needs an heir. Seeing Cao Yiran's appearance, he is not very big. She may be able to inherit her career, but it is not too late to train another one, after all, she is not old and can live for a long time.

Zhao Yue opened the door and entered the living room, just in time to see Bai Shu get up from Cao Yiran and look over.

Although Zhao Yue disapproved of homosexuality, she was not disgusted with the matter of her younger brothers Zhao Zhen and Zhang Huan. Maybe it was because Zhao Zhen was a relative and knew that the two were truly in love, so she could understand them.

What happened to her own son, she told herself, she had to understand.

Therefore, facing Bai Shu, even if she understands the matter between him and her son, she can still achieve the most basic understanding, but even though she understands, she can't warm up.

Her mood was very complicated, Cao Yiran was overwhelmed by the events of that year, and she was the same.

Zhao Yue just nodded to Bai Shu, and then walked to her son and sat down. She reached out and touched Cao Yiran's face and forehead. It was not hot but cold. She said worriedly, "This What's the matter? I think you have been in a bad state since eating. Are you feeling unwell. "

Cao Yiran looked at his mother's frowning expression, and felt sorry for her in his heart. He knew that everything he had came from his mother. Although his father was a high-ranking official, in fact he made almost no contribution to the family, and everything was subsidized by his mother. What I use, eat, live and live is all the money my mother has worked hard to earn. My mother is tired enough, but I always add trouble to her.

Cao Yiran's nose was slightly sour, and he stretched out his long arms to hug Zhao Yue, his voice was low and hoarse, "Mom, I'm fine, I just drank a little too much, and my stomach feels uncomfortable, I'll feel better after lying down just now. "

Zhao Yue looked at his son worriedly, touched his face twice, and said, "You have a bad stomach, so don't drink. Your forehead is so cold, did you also suffer from the cold just now? I'll let the car take you back , go back, take a hot bath, and have a good sleep, okay?"

Cao Yiran smiled and said, "Mom, don't worry about me. I'm fine. I'll go back later."

Bai Shu stood by and watched, Cao Yiran was a considerate child in front of her mother, he felt sad for some reason, he couldn't help it, and suggested, "Shall I send Yiran back? "

Only then did Zhao Yue raise his head and look at him. Just as he was about to speak, Cao Yiran also looked over and said to Zhao Yue, "Mom, let Bai Shu take me back. Are you still busy? Then Leave me alone. Go about your business."

Zhao Yue was worried, Zhou Yan stood beside him and said, "Auntie, I'll be with you too, it's fine."

Zhao Yue then rubbed Cao Yiran's hair and said, "Okay, let him take you back. If you are still not feeling well, just call me, or go to the hospital and ask the doctor to come at home It’s good to show you.”

Cao Yiran quickly assured, "I know how to take care of myself."

Zhao Yue still hugged her son worriedly, and sighed, "Mom doesn't care if you go out to play or make friends, but you have to pay attention to your body, okay?"

Cao Yiran froze for a moment before nodding.

Zhao Yue kissed Cao Yiran on the forehead like a child, in fact, her son was much taller than her, so Cao Yiran was a little embarrassed to be kissed by her, because Bai Shu was watching beside him.

After Zhao Yue got up, she glanced at Bai Shu again, and said, "Bai Shu, can you come over, can Auntie talk to you?"

Bai Shu nodded in agreement, and followed Zhao Yue out the door.

Zhou Yan glanced at Bai Shu's back, then walked to the sofa, bent down and touched Cao Yiran's forehead, and said, "You are really chilling again, you really turned into a snake."

Cao Yiran laughed and said, "I'm fine, I know I'm fine."

He did understand his physical condition. Just now in the parking lot downstairs, when he suddenly couldn't control himself and went crazy, he also remembered how he felt at that time. The way he died and fell into a pool of blood on the ground, he was afraid, shivering with fear.It was Bai Shu's warm and solid chest and arms that made him no longer so cold and afraid. He heard what Bai Shu said to him, felt Bai Shu's pat on his back, so he knew that the scene in his mind had already Many years have passed, now is not that time, he can slowly withdraw, don't disturb the scene at that time, so as not to bring out more terrible things.

Not only was he afraid of the scene at that time, he was even more afraid that he would lose control of himself because of it. He actually wanted to kill someone more than once. When he was in country A, he almost killed someone at a party that time because of the tall and strong Caucasian students wanted to have sex with him, and if he refused, they wanted to use force to succeed. Cao Yiran understood his identity. Although he seemed to have a good relationship with those students, he was always outside their circle. When he was raped by that male student, everyone would help him cover it up. At that time, his vicious and violent factors were aroused, and he almost killed that person. If he hadn't been stopped quickly, that person would have died for real. up.

Although he is not dead, in Cao Yiran's mind, that person is already dead.

Except this time, he almost killed someone again in a bar after returning to China, but he was also held back by his brothers. Everyone didn't realize that he really wanted to kill someone. They didn't know that he was abnormal compared to the usual one. Even more abnormal.

But he himself knew, he knew how twisted his heart was at that time.

He is more terrified of not being able to control his sometimes urge to kill than he is terrified of previous memories.

He sat there with his head deeply buried in his knees, such a hunched posture made Zhou Yan feel unbearable heartache even looking at it.

Zhou Yan sat down beside him, and said softly, "If there is something uncomfortable, tell me, I can help you solve the problem, I will help you..."

Cao Yiran shook his head.

Zhou Yan had no choice but to remain silent for a long time before opening his mouth again, saying, "I see, that white tree is pretty good, you like him, don't you?"

Cao Yiran was silent, and it took a long time before he answered in a low voice, and said, "As he said, I have accepted him in my heart. But, I don't know how to be with him. Thinking about it, I always feel too vain and too empty." Gone with the wind, two big men, sticky, don't look good. Besides, I really don't want to be restrained by anyone, but he always wants to restrict me. cannot meet his demands.”

Zhou Yan listened and understood Cao Yiran's words very well, because he knew Cao Yiran too well.

He reached out and patted Cao Yiran on the back, and after thinking for a while, he said, "If two people want to be together, they have to get along with each other. There are no two people who can get along with each other from the first contact. After being together for a long time, it will become a suitable appearance for two people to be together without getting hurt. And when he wants to restrict you, he means restricting you. I think it means not letting you go out to find others, or not letting you have fun in bars It's crazy."

Seeing Cao Yiran slightly raised his head and looking ahead, Zhou Yan knew that what he said was very right, so he continued, "It is not enough to be loyal in the heart, you must have the loyalty of the body, just like you can't stand him being with women , how can you ask him to condone you messing around with others."

Cao Yiran raised his head to look at Zhou Yan again, and said, "He's a policeman, he's busy every day, he doesn't have time to be with me at all, and he doesn't let me go find someone else, it's too much."

Zhou Yan knew that Cao Yiran was the kind of person who didn't want anyone to disturb him when he wanted to be alone, and wanted many people to accompany him when he was afraid of emptiness and loneliness. Said, maybe too hard.

He didn't know what to say for a moment, so he thought for a while before saying, "It's just that you are too idle, you help Auntie take care of the business, it will be better when you are busy."

Cao Yiran lowered his head again, and said the truth, "I don't think I will do well. I would rather not do it, and I don't want my mother to be disappointed."

Zhou Yandao, "If you don't do it, you will say something frustrating, you have to try."

Cao Yiran shook his head stubbornly, "I don't want to try."

What Zhou Yan wanted to say, Bai Shu had already opened the door and came in, Cao Yiran raised his head and looked at Bai Shu, feeling a little worried about what his mother had said to him, it was very likely that it would not be a good thing.