Where did Jin Jiaxuan go?

That night, Shang Yang slept very well, feeling comfortable physically and mentally, and had no dreams all night.

By daybreak, he woke up with a feeling like being immersed in a hot spring, tide, heat.

He wanted to break free from the spring, but when he moved a little, he was grabbed by a beast that leaped out of the water and took it back.

At 07:30, the sun shone through the cracks in the curtains.

The floor is not high, and you can hear the movement of neighbors in the community going to work or going to school.

The comfort of vacation is magnified a lot at this time.

"What do you want for breakfast? I'll go out and buy it, and you can sleep again." Jin Xu said thoughtful words, his arms and thighs domineeringly pressed Shang Yang horizontally.

"Don't sleep, just eat something, and go to the hospital with you." Shang Yang complained again, "Why are you pretending to be a good person now, and assaulting the police early in the morning, it's outrageous."

Jin Xu showed that he is a good person who abides by the law: "Officer, I only acted on seeing you awake."

Shang Yang originally had his eyes closed, but upon hearing this, he opened them, turned around, and asked with concern, "You've woken up a long time ago? Didn't you sleep well?"

Jin Xu said: "No, I slept better than usual. I woke up when you moved, and I just dreamed of you."

Shang Yang: "What did you dream about me again?"

Jin Xu didn't answer, leaned over and kissed him, then rubbed his face with messy hair.

It can't be a serious dream.

"A fine, even infringing my portrait right in my dream." Shang Yang said.

"Remove the word portrait rights." Jin Xu corrected him.

Shang Yang: "..."

After rubbing his face, Jin Xu kissed him again, and bit him twice after kissing.

"Stop, stop," Shang Yang felt that this is not going to work, and said, "If I do it again, I will die."

Jin-wook stops and looks at him closely, as if observing a breeder's large carnivore.

He emphasized it again, expressing his refusal and praising the other party: "As long as my physical fitness is poor, I died here just now."

The corners of Jin Xu's lips curled up, and he said, "I dreamed that you said something similar to me."

Shang Yang said in his heart, last time you said that I broke the law and seduced the police in your dream. God knows what strange dream scenes you arranged for me all day long.

Jin Xu hugged him, was strangely silent for a moment, and said in a low voice, "I'm sick."

Shang Yang acted like a baby to him because he had nothing to do, and it was quite useful, and replied: "I will take you to see a doctor today, come back and have a good rest, and you will be fine soon."

Jin Xu said: "Honey, I... didn't tell you the truth yesterday."

Shang Yang: "?"

Jin Xu confessed to him that during the hospital fall incident, he passed the suspect in the corridor, and did not see his face clearly because of a short-term illness.

After half an hour.

The two had breakfast at a McDonald's outside the community.

Jin Xu is like a pupil who has done something wrong, stealthily watching the adults to see if he is angry, and carefully observes Shang Yang's face.

"What do you want me to do? Go see a doctor after eating," Shang Yang said, "I can't see your illness again."

Jin Xu asked, "Are you angry?"

Shang Yang said: "No. You don't say it because you are afraid that I will worry, I understand."

Jin Xu: "..."

Shang Yang looked up at him, and calmly warned him: "But you can't do this again in the future, and I will really get angry next time."

Jin Xu was tempted on the verge of death, and even said: "If I didn't tell you because I was afraid of you worrying?"

Shang Yang wanted to splash the coffee in his hand on his face, but he held back, and said in a flat tone: "After seeing the doctor and making sure you're all right, if you don't make me angry again, I'll beat you up boldly, okay?"

After returning from the Southwest Cult Case, Jin Xu went to the Provincial Public Security Hospital for an examination. The doctor said he was suffering from neurasthenia, and later he went to Beijing to sign up for an expert account. The Beijing Shennei expert also said the same.

Today Shang Yang accompanied him to come here again, the same doctor who examined him before.

I went through all the equipment checks that should be done again, and the conclusion was still the same. There was no organic disease, and I couldn't sleep well due to excessive dreams, or it was because of too much pressure and high mental tension.

Based on the results of the instrumental examination, the doctor made a similar diagnosis to the previous one.

Shang Yang listened carefully.Jin-wook himself sat there silently, with his head down, absent-minded.

After the doctor finished speaking, Shang Yang said, "He recently suffered a brief loss of consciousness."

The doctor asked, "Once or many times?"

Jin Xu lowered his head slightly, looking at Shang Yang, as if he didn't hear the doctor's question.

Shang Yang said: "Doctor ask you something, are you dumb?"

Only then did Jin Xu turn to look at the doctor, but he really didn't hear it, so he guessed, and replied, "Only once."

"Do any elders in the family suffer from epilepsy?" the doctor asked again.

Jin Xu: "..."

Shang Yang frowned, and answered for him: "There is no family history, he himself suffered from pseudo-epilepsy a few years ago."

The doctor looked surprised.

Shang Yang understood, how dare this guy never tell the doctor that he was sick the last time he came to see a doctor?

He glared at Jin-wook and wanted to give the guy a hard punch.

Jin Xu also looked at him and said, "I'm fine. This time is different from last time."

Shang Yang couldn't see that this person was still being stubborn at this time, so he taunted: "You still see a doctor for yourself? It's really amazing."

Jin Xu said, "It's just different, I know."

Shang Yang said: "Okay, you know, of course you know, but I don't know, I don't deserve to know."

Jin Xu: "..."

The doctor had never seen anything, and turned a deaf ear to this dispute. Seeing that the two of them had stopped talking, he asked Jin Xu what was going on and what medicine he had taken.

Jin Xu mentioned the names of a few medicines, most of which were diazepam. Seeing that the doctor frowned, Shang Yang also raised his heart.

"At that time, I was busy with work, and I committed it several times. In the first few times, there was no one around me. I didn't pay attention to it. I thought it was just a common cramp. Later, my colleagues saw it once and said it might be epilepsy. I went to the local hospital to see it. , After the examination, the doctor said it was fake, but it was not suitable for a criminal police officer anymore, so I stepped back." Jin Xu said.

Shang Yang: "..."

He suffered from "several" illnesses in a row, and he didn't take it seriously. He didn't know to go to the hospital until someone saw it and reminded him.

"Pseudoepilepsy is usually a mental problem. It should be due to too much work pressure." The doctor said, "How long did it take to recover? Is it purely by taking medicine?"

Jin Xu said, "No, I stopped taking the medicine for a year."

He glanced at Shang Yang, and said: "When something good happened, I thought about it and recovered slowly."

The "good thing" he said was that about three years ago, Shang Yang and Qu Liaoyuan went to Baiyuan to visit him.

The doctor asked again: "Do you think this time is different from last time? What's the difference?"

He replied: "The cause is different."

Both Shang Yang and the doctor looked at him blankly, did he really treat himself?

Jin Xu said: "I know my situation myself."

He looked at Shang Yang and said seriously, "I really know."

In view of the fact that psychiatric drugs are prone to dependence and have strong side effects, after consulting Jin Xu himself, the doctor did not prescribe the drug this time, but reminded him: "It's only mild now, if you don't pay attention, there is still a possibility It has become as serious as last time, rest more, communicate with people around you if you have any concerns, and keep an open mind. If your organs are fine, it’s just a heart disease.”

As soon as he came out of the department, Shang Yang asked, "What's wrong with you? Tell me clearly about what happened last time and what happened this time."

Jin Xu said: "Go back and ask if it's okay? I feel dizzy when I smell the disinfectant water from the hospital."

Shang Yang glared at him fiercely.

He pretended to be relaxed and jokingly said: "You are still angry that I didn't tell you the truth. Just now I pretended to be generous, so I insisted that I was not angry."

Shang Yang took a deep breath, raised his fist, and punched him directly in the chest.

He originally thought, let's cooperate with his wife to beat him up, it's nothing.

Unexpectedly, Shang Yang really used six or seven parts of his strength. He was unprepared and staggered two steps back after being beaten. He pressed his hand on the sore spot, looked at Shang Yang in astonishment, and thought hesitantly, this... to pretend to be wronged ?

Shang Yang couldn't bear it and shouted loudly: "Jin Jiaxuan! Can you cherish yourself?"

Jin Xu: "..."

Shang Yang walked away, Jin Xu was nailed to the place by the long-standing, dust-covered name, he was stunned for a moment, and then remembered that he should catch up.

Fortunately, he was tall and long-legged, so he quickly caught up with the man. Now he knew that Shang Yang was really angry, and he didn't deliberately put on airs before. He followed behind Shang Yang, and changed from the previous deliberately relaxed expression to annoyed and uneasy.

He just thought it was hard to talk about his illness, and he wanted to explain it clearly to Shang Yang, to apologize, and to explain to Shang Yang many things that he didn't want to explain at first.

He thought that Shang Yang might be angry because of being concealed, but he never thought that Shang Yang was angry because he didn't love himself enough.

On the taxi back, the two sat in the back row, Shang Yang turned his head and looked out the window, with a cold arc from the side of his face to his chin.

Jin Xu tried a few times but didn't get a response. He didn't want to be laughed at by the driver, so he finally gave up and swiped his phone dejectedly.

Shang Yang is both angry and sad, the depression being concealed at the moment and the anger that cannot be traced back to the past are really mixed feelings in his heart.

He had every reason to lose his temper because Jin Xu didn't tell him the truth, but what if he lost his temper?Jin Xu was ill, and he couldn't replace him. He was so seriously ill a few years ago, and he didn't have the opportunity to know the actual situation until now. It's useless, what's the use?In those years he knew nothing and was nothing.

These are not the most important things. What annoys him the most is that Jin Xu doesn’t take his health seriously. He used to be lonely and loved whomever he loved, and he is still like this now. Does this person know in his heart that he is no longer alone?

...Even in the past, it wasn't about loving someone. Even if they never fell in love in this life, he still hoped that Jin Xu would be a healthy and happy person.

After holding back for a long time, he turned his head and wanted to scold Jin Xu severely, but when he saw Jin Xu looking at something in his mobile phone, his thick eyebrows furrowed heavily.

He had an intuition that something was wrong, so he asked first, "What's the matter?"

Jin Xu: "..."

He showed Shang Yang the phone page.

Shang Yang only glanced at it to understand that it was still the online comment about the sexual murder scandal between the deputy director of public security and the beautiful female doctor.

The Ministry of Industry and Information Technology stepped in and withdrew the first batch of manuscripts that were widely reposted, and the Provincial Public Security Bureau issued a police report to clarify that those were false, and largely quelled speculation.

But as Gu Fei predicted, there will always be some people who only want to believe the "truth" they believe in: what official notification?I don't listen!It's all to cover up the facts, if you understand it, you will naturally understand it!

"Don't take it too seriously," Shang Yang said, not wanting Jin Xu to be affected by these people, "The flies are very forgetful, and they will soon forget this place and go to other lively places to make noise."

Jin Xu said, "It won't affect me."

If this was said in the past, Shang Yang would have believed it immediately, and he would have thought that Jin Xu was such an informal, open-minded and open-minded person. Now he can't help but suspect that Jin Xu is very likely to be much more sensitive than he thought. .

"Really." Jin Xu met his gaze calmly and said, "I don't care about such things now, and I don't want to live in the evaluation of others."

Shang Yang asked mercilessly: "Does that mean you cared about it before?"

Jin Xu said: "A long time ago, when I didn't know you."

That was before I went to OUHK to study.During his time as "Jin Jiaxuan", he was actually hurt by the ignorance or pure viciousness and maliciousness of those teenagers, and he cared very much for a time.

Shang Yang regretted it all at once, he shouldn't have called out that name when he was emotional.

"Why was it last time?" He asked, meaning why did he get sick last time?Is it related to the experience of adolescence?

Jin Xu said: "I think too much about myself, thinking I can change the world, but I can't."

Shang Yang: "What?"

Jin Xu raised his phone, the comment page was still on the screen, he shook the phone and said: "There are many people in the world who don't have fairness and justice in their hearts, are indifferent, selfish, ignorant, and numb. It constitutes them, they have no ability to judge, and the ass determines the head. I established this cognition when I was a teenager, and I think that this kind of people are the silent majority. Following their logic is the unspoken rule of this world. Graduation When I came back from Beijing, I thought I had the power and ability to break the rules. I thought I could change the world, at least from my own side. When I found out that I couldn’t do it, I fell ill.”

Shang Yang: "..."

The driver looked at them both strangely in the rearview mirror.

"Pull over." Shang Yang said.

He and Jin Xu got off the car on the side of the road a few kilometers away from home.

Next to it is a middle school, and under the fence are small roses that are about to bloom, forming a dense flower wall, blooming half-withered flowers and soft thorns to them.

Shang Yang couldn't wait to go back, and went to find out Jin Xu's heart knot, which was also hidden behind the bright flowers and mysterious thorns.

"Why do you say it can't be done?" Shang Yang said, "You obviously did a good job, you did a particularly good job!"

Jin Xu lowered his eyes and said, "I caught Liu Weidong."

"?" Shang Yang said, "He is a thief, and you are a policeman. What's wrong with arresting him? Don't say that when you arrested him, you had selfish motives and intentional revenge. I don't believe it, you are not that kind of person."

Jin Xu catches thieves according to the regulations and laws, and there is no personal grievance involved in this matter.

Liu Weidong burglarized and exchanged Chen Jing's mother's jewelry for gambling funds. He was sentenced based on the exact loss of property and criminal circumstances. In his case, he would start with three years in prison.

But after being captured by Jin Xu, Liu Weidong used his agreement to divorce Chen Jing as a bargaining chip to threaten Chen Jing's parents to change their confession, and finally successfully escaped the punishment.

Shang Yang suddenly understood.

This result trampled to a certain extent the truth that Jin Xu wanted to defend. He was still very young at that time, his ideals were green and immature, but the person involved was still the damned Liu Weidong.

"I wasn't a good character, withdrawn, and paranoid. You didn't like me before because of me." Jin Xu said.

Shang Yang thought to himself, you are not, and neither am I. I was really two self-righteous fools when I was a student.

Jin Xu said: "At that time, when I was sick, I became more desperate. Since I can't do well, I just forget it. I am so tired to live, and I will be relieved if I die sooner."

He is earnestly struggling to survive, waiting to die.

Suddenly one day, Shang Yang came to see him.

"I told you about the rest." Jin Xu said.

On his ruins, a grass seed fell into it, a sprout grew, and the sun grew.