The disaster of relatives and friends is rampant

"My brother said that your Professor Wei is here." After hanging up the phone, Duan He lowered his head and ate vegetables.

"Oh, Weiyu's love rival is here." Xiaoman chewed on the mutton.

The two looked at each other knowingly, Xiao Man shook his head, "Poor Wei Yu, Wei Nanhe will definitely take Xiao Qi away, and then throw Wei Yu in the hospital under the pretext of recuperating."

Duan He was surprised: "How do you know, you heard what my brother and I said?"

"No." Xiaoman took a sip of the soup, "I can figure it out with my butt, and I would do the same thing if I changed it."

Duan He sneered, thinking, your butt is smarter than your brain.

Since there is only one bed in the bachelor's dormitory, Xiaoman occupies the position against the wall with absolute advantage and squeezes the owner to the edge of the bed. He betrays the color that is not rare for others and forces Duan He to go out to buy delicious food. He was so poisoned that he had to borrow a motorbike from Wu Qian next door to the supermarket to buy two bags of food, so lunch was a pot of hot pot with duck meat, and dinner was hot mutton with some water left over from the bottom of the pot.

Xiaoman eats meat very fiercely, like a wild beast. He scoops the mutton into the pot with his chopsticks and takes it out in half a second. He can eat the meat even with blood in it. Duan He looks very scared, and humbly eats only vegetables And tofu, don't forget to tell: "If you boil it hot, no one will fight with you, and you will have diarrhea if you eat it uncooked."

"It's okay, my stomach is immune to all poisons!" Xiaoman snorted and stuffed the freshly scalded mutton into his mouth, "Hey, Weiyu is a good guy, I don't know why Xiaoqi chose that old man."

Duan He: "If you eat slowly, you will die? Don't worry if it burns to death."

"Look, Xiaoqi is only 17 years old, Wei Nanhe is twice his age!" Xiaoman said with a finger in his mouth, "When Xiaoqi is the same age as me, Wei Nanhe will be almost fifty! "Duan He answered casually, then thought again: Hey, how did he calculate this?

"When Xiaoqi is 35 years old, he will be a mature and sexy man who can have a car full of beautiful women. Wei Nanhe is already [-], and he can suffer from Alzheimer's like his father!" Xiaoman's face was full of regret.

Duan He: "..."

Xiaoman said to himself: "Weiyu will be different, Xiaoqi will grow up another six years, and they will be the same age!"

Duan He: "..."

Xiaoman pretended to be helpless, and said old-fashionedly: "Oh, I can't guess what the young people are thinking now."

Duan He: "..."

It was still warm in early December in the south, and the sun was soft and dazzling. Yang Xiaokong was sitting on the roof of the porcelain workshop with his back to the sun, playing with some pieces of Clark porcelain, and suddenly heard someone calling him. He leaned out of the roof and looked down, and saw Le Zhengqi in a pink sweater and overalls.

"Xiaoqi! When did you come back?" Yang Xiaokong climbed down the bamboo ladder.

"I just came back, I called you downstairs several times!" Le Zhengqi put his hands in his trouser pockets, smiling, "The chickenpox is gone! It recovered very quickly, and only some scars are left."

Yang Xiaokong was smiling all over his face, looking left and right, "Where is Weiyu?"

"He's injured." Le Zheng Qi pointed to his head, "He suffered a concussion here. He lives in Xianyang. Nan He said he won't come back until after the Chinese New Year."

"How did you get hurt?"

"Buy explosives in the tomb and smash yourself." Le Zhengqi limped to one side of the steps and sat down.

"What happened to your leg?"

"It was smashed too, it's okay." Le Zhengqi waved his hand and shouted: "Jissbon!"

Yang Xiaokong thought he heard it wrong, "Jie...Jie...Shibang?"

Before he finished speaking, the black cat ran over and circled around Le Zhengqi with its tail curled up. Le Zhengqi stroked the cat and introduced, "I picked it up in the grave, Jie Shibang."

Yang Xiaokong: "..."

Le Zheng pointed at Yang Xiaokong with seven fingers, and said to the black cat, "Call me uncle."

Black cat: "Meow."

Yang Xiaokong twitched the corner of his mouth, "Uh, you, hello."

The hairs of the three dogs have grown unevenly, and they stared timidly at the black cat two meters away. He was standing there, half-closed his green eyes in a thoughtful state, and his long black hair reflected sparkling reflections in the sun, giving him a majestic majesty.

The skinny yellow dog with its tail between its legs, lowered its neck and sniffed as it approached, making a flattering sound of "wow".

The other two earth dogs watched the development from a distance, while Jissbon remained motionless.

Bian Bian gradually approached, and couldn't shake because his tail was clamped, so he had to shake his buttocks: "Woooo..."

Yang Xiaokong frowned and said, "Xiao Qi, dogs will bite cats."

Le Zhengqi: "Bian Bian is so timid, he doesn't even bite a chicken, how could he bite a cat?"

Bian Bian got close to Jie Qibang, and sniffed it with his probe. Jie Shi Bang seemed to have dozed off, and there was no movement. With lightning speed, he swiped his paws and grabbed the flat nose!Bianbian yelped and jumped back, barking furiously from embarrassment.

Jissbon stood up slowly, arched his back, and whispered: "Meow..."

Bian Bian turned around and ran away, and the other two dogs ran away like birds and beasts, and the three dogs disappeared in a blink of an eye.

Lezheng quickly took the black cats into his arms and hugged them: "Jissbon, don't bully them, you have to use your 2000 years of self-cultivation, don't care about them like them!"

Yang Xiaokong thought in a cold sweat, I didn't say that, I really don't understand Xiao Qi...

In the Xianyang hospital, Duan Sha stood under the high wall around the inpatient department, with his hands behind his back, looking at Bai Weiyu calmly, "What are you doing?"

Bai Weiyu leaned on the top of the wall, nonchalantly said, "Basking in the sun."

Duan Sha: "The security guard told me that you were lying here before dawn."

Bai Weiyu: "Can't I wait for the sun?"

Duan Sha nodded, "Okay." Turning around to leave.

Bai Weiyu shouted tremblingly: "Come back!"

Duan Sha stopped in his tracks, "What's wrong?"

"I've had enough sun exposure, let's think about it."

"Come down, don't report to me."

"Find me a ladder."

"There is no such thing."

"Yes..." Bai Weiyu howled with tears: "There must be! Go find it!"

"Hey, this is a hospital, not my home. Where can I find it?" Duan Sha said with a blank expression, "Climb down as you want to climb up."

"It's okay for me to climb up, but when I lower my head after climbing up, I feel dizzy!"

"Are you afraid of heights?"

"Not before."

Duan Sha was thoughtful, "It seems to be a complication of concussion."

"Leave that alone!" Bai Weiyu glanced at the wall, his eyes were dazed, his whole body shook for a while, and he hurriedly pressed his belly against the top of the wall, motionless like a turtle, "I've been lying here for more than three hours under the wind blowing ,cold!"

Duan Sha looked up at the gray sky, and said refreshedly: "Yes. Looking at the weather, it's probably going to snow."

"Take care of me first! Brother Duan, Duan Lang, can I call you Lord?" Bai Weiyu sniffled, "Get me down!"

"You jump." Duan Sha watched his embarrassment in a leisurely manner, "I will follow you."

"what?"

Duan Sha opened his arms, "It's not high, I can catch you."

"Get out!" Bai Weiyu yelled, "I don't believe you! Don't think I forgot, you tricked me into feeding the monster in the tomb and ran away by yourself!"

Duan Sha withdrew his hand, turned his head and left, "Then I'll get out."

"Go back."

"Let's jump."

"No!" Bai Weiyu would rather die than surrender.

"Bye-Bye."

"return."

"Are you finished?" Duan Sha became impatient, "This wall is less than three meters, you are afraid of it! Listen to Duan He, you have won the Sanda champion three times in a row. What level of competition is that?"

Old Bai Weiyu blushed, "Don't listen to his nonsense, it's just a private fight at the Academy of Fine Arts..."

Duan Sha said playfully, "Three times."

"There were three group fights..." Bai Weiyu just wanted to come down quickly, and said weakly: "Brother Duan, please help me find a ladder, I'm dizzy, it's not like this before..."

Duan Sha fixed himself on the base of the wall, stretched out his hand, "Give me your hand."

"No."

"Give it to me! I'll drag you down, I promise I won't be able to break you!"

Bai Shou hesitated for a moment, gritted his teeth, thinking that it would be a big deal to hit his head again and become demented!Thinking of this, he closed his eyes and half leaned down, one arm tensely threw down, Duan Sha grabbed his hand, with a sudden force, Bai Weiyu screamed twice, spinning around, and threw it into Duan Sha in the blink of an eye. In Kill's arms, he knocked him down straight to the ground.

Feeling relieved as soon as the four claws landed, Bai Weiyu knelt up, rubbed his nose and said in a silly way, "Thanks, buddy."

Duan Sha sat up and coughed twice with a livid face, "Next time you want to escape from the hospital and go out through the main entrance, no one will catch you! Where did you learn this trick of climbing walls?"

Bai Weiyu resentfully said, "It was taught on TV."

"childish!"

"Thank you for the compliment."

"Go back to the ward."

"I don't want to stop, it's boring." Bai Weiyu sat on the ground with his body crooked, "Didn't the MRI report come out too? I'm fine!"

Duan Sha patted the ashes on his body, "It's really all right, don't make a fuss, you can go through the formal procedures and leave the hospital."

"Do you think I don't want to?" Bai Weiyu went crazy: "Brother Wei doesn't know what he told the hospital, the attending doctor won't let me go!"

Duan Sha raised his eyebrows: "Oh?"

Bai Weiyu sighed, "I want to go to Vietnam."

"Did you kill someone?"

Baiweiyu Waterfall Khan: "Is there any logic in this?"

"Those who run away usually go there."

"Fart!" Bai Weiyu pulled the withered grass on the ground, "My mother is over there."

Duan Sha looked at Bai Weiyu again: "Are you Vietnamese? Not like that!"

Bai Weiyu said, "No, my mother married there."

Duan Sha thought to himself, all Vietnamese women marry here, but your mother is better off marrying in Vietnam.Look at your little appearance, my mother shouldn't be too bad, why are you so out of your mind?

Bai Weiyu felt sorry for himself: "I'm going to Vietnam to see my mother, if that old guy bullies her, I'll bring her back..."

Duan Sha moved his compassionate heart, "Are you out of money?"

"Hmm." Bai Weiyu lowered his eyelids, his black eyelashes were pressed down to cover his eyes full of water, the cold wind blew his already sickly face into white and blue, the tip of his nose was flushed, his lips were purple, lol It's so pitiful that people cherish it.

Duan Sha couldn't help but swallowed his saliva, looked away in a panic, and said, "I'll lend you some travel expenses."

"My brother has returned to his hometown." Duan He asked Xiaoman, "Xiaoman, what kind of person is Baiweiyu?"

Xiaoman blinked his eyes and slapped his legs exaggeratedly: "Honest man, just like me!" Pointing to his nose, "Look at me, I can imagine him, I hit him like old friends, I've never met him before." Seeing such like-minded buddies, it’s not a real brother, but a real brother!”

Duan He put his hand on his forehead, "It's over, my brother lent him 6000 yuan, it is estimated that the meat bun beat the dog and never returned."

Xiaoman: "This guy Weiyu actually only cheated six thousand, it's so useless!"

Duan He was puzzled: "Unbelievable, what did he use to deceive my brother?"

"Beautiful!" Xiaoman winked, and turned into a small round mirror to look at the left and right: "It's really too much for a beautiful person like us to always be unable to get rid of those annoying admirers." It hurts my brain..."

Duan He worked hard to suppress the urge to hit him: "Speak normally!"

Xiao Man threw away the mirror, lay down on the table in a dejected state, and said in a rough voice, "I want to eat meat."

Xiaoman stayed in Duan He's dormitory for a week, and didn't even go downstairs. Sometimes Duan He brought some food back from the cafeteria, and most of the time he still ate hot pot. Add water and ingredients to it and continue to eat. After eating for five or six days in a row, the food was very tasteless. Duan and that nerd were busy writing papers and going to the library all day, so they didn't have time to talk to him.

One day, Xiaoman downloaded "Human Skin Inn" from Duan He's computer, and watched it while eating. The killing factory in the movie tricked people into it, beheading their hands, feet, eyes, and skin. The dormitory reverberated, and Duan He was terrified when he heard it, and tremblingly begged: "Xiaoman, during meal time, can you stop watching such disgusting movies?"

Xiaoman hummed, staring at the computer screen intently, chewing vegetables without taste.

In the movie, a man dressed as a boiler worker pushes a trolley, along the way, picks up severed hands, feet, and leftover heads or internal organs on the trolley, pushes them to the side of the boiler, and throws them into the fire to burn them piece by piece.

Xiao Man stuffed a piece of dried tofu into his mouth, his eyes blurred: "So much meat is roasting, it must be delicious."

Duan He's scalp was numb, he got up and turned off the power of the computer, "Eat!"

Only then did Xiaoman turn his gaze to the table, complaining, "I have no appetite."

"Stir-fried pork liver with carrots, it nourishes blood!" Duan He pushed the fried pork liver towards him, and pointed at the shredded meat in Mushu pork with his chopsticks, "There is meat here!"

Xiaoman put his face close to the table, squinted his eyes and searched: "Where is the meat?"

"You are really difficult to serve." Duan He picked out the shredded meat for him, "I don't have time, so I can only go to the cafeteria and buy some casually to cope with it. Can't you make do with it?" Duan He also felt sorry for it, thinking about it Think, say: "Wake up early tomorrow, take you to buy something to eat, you know the way, and when you feel better, go shopping by yourself."

Xiao Man drank the soup: "Okay!"

Duan He smiled: "What do you want to eat?"

Without thinking, Xiaoman said, "Pangolin."

Duan He almost spat out the soup in his mouth: "That's a state-protected animal, you can't eat it!"

Xiao Man raised his head and asked in surprise, "Who said that?"

"Who said it? The law said it! Did you really graduate from college? You are legally illiterate! Even elementary school students know it!"

"What will happen if you eat it?"

"Eat one and get ten years in prison, and eat two for life!" Duan He was alarmist.

"Impossible?" Xiaoman didn't believe it.

"What are you talking about, what will happen if you eat a panda?" Xiaoman trembled all over, and he couldn't hold his chopsticks steadily.

"Pangolins and pandas are protected animals at the same level!" Duan He said bitterly: "There are people who are so mad that they eat protected animals. Tell me, if they are caught, they will be severely punished!" Xiaoman stopped talking, and there were dark clouds above his head Block out the sun.

Duan He wanted to laugh, but held back abruptly, "Why, have you eaten?"

"No." The little barbarian looked like a mouse.

Duan He kindly persuaded: "Eat it all, just stop eating it in the future."

Xiaoman was shaking like a sieve, suddenly dropped the bowl and rushed towards Duan He, wailing: "I ate three, should I be shot?"

Duan Hezuo was shocked: ""What? Where did you eat it? Are there any witnesses?"

"I caught and ate it when I saw it in the wild, the conscience of heaven and earth! I didn't know I couldn't eat it..."

Duan Heshun comforted him: "Okay, I won't say anything, it's fine."

Xiaoman was so moved that tears filled his eyes: "Anna answered..."

Duan He was cold: "If you call me that again, I'll call the police and tell you to eat pangolins." Xiaoman immediately shut up.

The big supermarket was too far away, and Duan He was afraid that Xiaoman's body would not be able to bear it, so he took him for a walk in the vegetable market not far from the school. He was so crowded that he just wanted to buy some mutton to deal with the gluttonous wolves and then left. He didn't want to see Xiaoman for the first time just after weighing the mutton.

After turning two corners, I saw that guy was harming fellow women again. He was chatting happily with a simple peasant girl who sold tofu. !"

Xiaoman complained: "I was raised by you for a few days, and I was very lonely..." After finishing speaking, he felt unable to express his feelings, so he added another

One word: "Ah!"

"The stocking will start tomorrow." Duan He was in a cold sweat, "It's best not to let me back."

Xiaoman immediately acted weak and changed the subject, "Oh, I want to eat fish..."

"Then buy one."

Xiaoman: "...wings."

"Let me go buy some fans and pretend." Duan He was afraid that he would get lost, so he took his hand halfway, but felt that it was inappropriate, so he pulled his sleeve instead and walked to the fish stall. While walking, he said, "Be careful yourself, there are many people here, don't let someone hit your shoulder."

Xiaoman responded, with great interest, "Hey, let's have a bowl of spicy garlic and sheep's blood together."

Duan He said, "No, I don't eat offal."

"Blood isn't internal organs, is it?"

"Then I don't eat blood and offal."

"Where's the pork liver?" Xiaoman was disdainful, asking about what he ate last night.

"……eat."

"You don't eat offal, do you?"

"I just eat pork liver."

"Why are you so troubled?"

"none of your business?"

"I want to eat sheep's blood." Xiaoman returned to the old topic.

Duan He gave him a bill, "Go and eat, I'll buy fish, just sit there and wait for me."

Xiaoman took the money and ran to eat sheep blood. Duan He sighed and said to himself: If you get lost in the desert, others will starve to death. I don't think he can die. He can even eat lizards.

Duan He bought a fish, waited for the fishmonger to slaughter and wash the fish, and then went back to the original place with a plastic bag to find Xiaoman.Xiaoman had finished eating the sheep's blood early, and squatted beside a wire cage, not knowing what he was looking at.Before Duan Heren got close, he called out from a distance: "Xiaoman!"

Xiaoman turned his head, his eyes glistened with excitement, and he smiled and shouted, "There is something delicious!"

"Oh?" Duan He was funny, what made him so happy?The kid still had a pleasing smile.

Xiaoman stood up, holding a snake in his right hand.

"Ah!" Duan He jumped up, stepped back a few steps and shouted violently: "Put it back, put it back!"

"This is a grass snake!" The implication is that it is not poisonous.

"I don't care what kind of snake it is, put it back!" Duan He was so shocked that his face turned pale.

"Why..." Xiaoman bent down and put the grass snake back into the wire cage, staring at the viper in the other cage, "This fat one!"

Duan He: "No!"

Xiaoman opened the other cage, quickly grabbed the tail of the viper, and pulled it out viciously. The viper was more than one meter long, raised its triangular head and hissed, and rushed towards Xiaoman's front door. Lifting the tail of the snake, shook it vigorously, and at the same time stepped on the head of the snake, drooling with greed: "This is the one, it looks delicious!"

The snake seller said: "Little brother, take it easy, my snake is about to be trampled to death by you!"

Duan Helei ran: "I don't eat snakes, put them back for me..."

Xiaoman took a step forward, "It's not difficult at all, just steam it!"

Duan He retreated again and again: "Don't come here! I don't care, uh... you... anyway, put it back quickly!"

"Why?" Xiaoman tilted his head with a naive expression.

"I... I'm afraid..."

"Why are you so timid?"

"You... can you be a little more timid? Huuu..."

The snake seller flattered: "Little brother, you are very skilled, don't you often catch snakes too?"

Xiaoman laughed aloud: "No, it's the first time I caught it."

The snake seller said solemnly, "Impossible!"

"Really." Xiaoman turned his head and glanced at Duan He, "I didn't bring a gun today, and I used to shoot it with one shot..." Holding the snake with one hand, pointing at the snake with the other hand as if making a gun, he said: "Pa, pa ,Snapped!"

"Shut up!" Duan He roared, "Put it back quickly!"

"But……"

Duan He threatened: "Three pangolins!"

Xiaoman had no choice but to stuff the snake into the cage, swallow hard through the cage, and said reluctantly, "I'm sorry, I can't buy you back and eat you."

Duan He weakly found a tree to support him, and swallowed his tears: This person is so annoying...

Xiaoman concluded: "You are not a man."

"Whatever you say." Duan He climbed the stairs with Xiaoman on his back, panting from exhaustion, "Don't go downstairs if you want me to recite it in the future!"

Xiaoman hooked his neck, clamped his legs tightly, and shut up obediently. After a while, he leaned into Duan He's ear and asked, "Where's the piece of white jade in the mummy's mouth?"

"At my brother's place."

"Is it sold?"

"It seems to be sold, I don't know."

"What is it like?" Xiaoman lowered his voice: "It's yours! Why don't you ask?"

"Isn't my brother's money mine? We brothers have nothing to divide. He discussed with me. Didn't he have a comrade-in-arms who died in the tomb? All the money from the sale will be given to the family of his comrade-in-arms." Duan He sighed, "We narrowly escaped death, and we are the luckiest if we get back a full life. Money is something outside of us."

Xiaoman slapped him on the head and said, "Go to hell, you are so generous! Anyone who is not interested in money will not go to the grave!"

Duan He stopped in his tracks, "Hit me again, and I'll throw you down!" Hearing this, Xiao Man grabbed the prison like an octopus.

Seeing that he was honest, Duan He climbed up again, "I didn't approve of tomb robbery. It was my brother's comrades who had a way to do it after retiring. That person remembered my brother's good skills, so he asked him to join him. , I went with it out of love and curiosity for the profession.”

"It's really selfless and great." Xiaoman sneered.

Duan He Zhengse said: "Tell me, that kid Le Zhengqi's bronze dagger should be donated to the museum just like your mask!"

Xiaoman was taken aback: "Same as my mask?"

On Duan He's forehead, a bean-sized bead of cold sweat slid down, thinking that he had slipped his tongue.

After being frozen for three seconds, Xiaoman jumped off Duan He's back and pointed to his nose: "You..."

When Duan He saw that the matter was revealed, he said boldly, "I took your...no, it wasn't yours, it belonged to the state. Anyway, I sent the golden mask to the museum anonymously."

"You..." Xiaoman pointed at Duan He's trembling hand, "Duan! Why didn't you give me your jade!"

"If my brother's comrade-in-arms hadn't died, I'd send 100% of the jade to the museum!" Duan He predicted that he would be mad with anger, so he hurriedly stepped forward and said with a smile: "The mask is a cultural relic, and it's not convenient for you to get rid of it. If you are caught, you will be sentenced, I am not..."

Xiaoman punched him on the bridge of the nose, turned around and ran upstairs, Duan He staggered, and in a panic, he held on to the railing so as not to fall down the stairs. Also non-stop.Xiaoman kicked open the door aggressively, threw himself under the bed, and dragged out his bag... There was a piece of tile in it.

Duan He took it easy for a long time before he stopped crying, raised his head, covered his nose, and smiled wryly.

There was the sound of Xiaoman roaring and throwing things from upstairs, and Wu Qian who was next door stumbled down the stairs, bumping into Duanhe and yelling, "Your wife is crazy, everyone on the sixth floor is watching at the door of your dormitory." Hurry up, your computer was thrown out, hurry up..."

Duan He showed off the blood on his hands, Wu Qian shrank his neck and said, "What's wrong with you?"

Duan He waved his hand, "Don't worry about housework."