Two stupid postmodern life

That night, Er Sha and Fei Cui chatted a lot, from their acquaintance, making friends, making McDonald's, to opening the Xiangxiang Cake Shop. I couldn't get in the conversation, but I listened with gusto.He is like an audience, watching a very interesting and witty opera, but unconsciously, completely immersed in it.

For some reason, the topic suddenly turned to herself, only to hear Ersha say: "Jade, this time, don't blame Arman, everything is destined, we just can't escape."

Fei Cui took a sip of tea, but didn't answer, showing her disapproval.

Ersha sighed: "Fei Cui, I know you won't listen to what I say. You look fragile on the outside, but you are stubborn on the inside. We were by your side before. Although you were taking care of us on the surface, in fact, we It is your pillar, your straw..." Seeing the eyes of the emerald gradually turning red but still holding back the tears, Ersha became cruel, and continued: "But after this incident, I understand the impermanence of life. Ye...Xuan Ye, who was so strong in martial arts and would live to be a hundred years old, died without even saying hello." At this point, Ersha's face that had been calm for so many days was finally chapped and broken, and his eyes, Dry, wet, and full of tears.Tears flowed down, but those eyes, like a reservoir that let go of the gate, could no longer dry up.

It wasn't until this moment that Ersha dared to admit and face the fact that Xuan Ye had died.

Although tears were streaming down his face, Ersha still said in a calm tone: "Jade, everyone will die, and one day, I will die too. At that time, what will you do?"

Fei Cui was silent, it was undeniable that Ersha knew him too well, he knew him better than himself.

He took Arman's wine, poured a full glass, and drank it down in one gulp, letting the endless pungentness fill his throat so as to block the heat in his eyes, Emerald said in a slightly drunken tone, "Don't worry, I will definitely die in front of you."

Ersha burst into tears even more fiercely, he seemed to be caught in a long-lasting memory, and said leisurely: "I said this to Xuan Ye before, but now..."

The conversation broke up unhappily like this, and Ersha returned to his small courtyard. Fei Cui and Arman were still drinking cups under the moonlight, as if only by getting drunk could they temporarily escape from the abyss of pain and hopelessness and gain A moment of peace.

It was late at night, and Ersha stared at the candle wick in the hut for a while, then he stood up slowly, began to wash, and tidied up in front of the bronze mirror.

Apply ice water to the swollen eyes from crying, which is better than swollen into two walnuts. The hair is combed thinly and tied up in a high bun. In the yellowed copper mirror, there is a thin young man with a sallow complexion. Reflected in it, the clever eyes that were proud of before have lost their good-looking light now, Ersha curled his lips at himself in the mirror, how ugly!

Fatigue, chest tightness, fever, and faintly palpable lymph nodes made Ersha realize that the moment he was looking forward to was coming soon.

After wiping and disinfecting the whole hut with spirits, and leaving a letter to Fei Cui, Ersha went out, walked around the tents of Fei Cui and Arman, and walked towards the ice room.

The night breeze is blowing, the full moon is bright, along the way, the birds are singing and the insects are singing, the birds are singing and the flowers are fragrant. The outside world is the most pleasant time in early autumn. on heart.

The fantasy Xuan Ye came out to disrupt the situation again: "The bustling world, the beautiful scenery on a good day, don't you miss it? Is it worth giving up these for me?"

"No matter how beautiful the scenery is, you have to watch it with your loved ones to be happy!" Ersha said, pushing open the door of the ice room: "Xuan Ye, here I come."

This is the first time Ersha saw Xuan Ye in the past ten days,

In the ice coffin, Xuan Ye's eyebrows stretched out, and his body didn't turn purple or black like the other patients, as if he just fell into a deep sleep. Ersha walked over, pushed the coffin lid, bent down, ignoring the biting cold around him, and hugged him tightly. Hugging him, he choked up and said, "Xuan Ye, I miss you so much, do you miss me?"

"Xuan Ye, I was bitten by rat fleas and I'm about to die. I don't want to die so ugly and black all over. That way I won't be worthy of you, so I'll accompany you now, okay?

Xuan Ye, don't blame me, I didn't commit suicide, I wanted to live, but I was unlucky, that day, I wore two layers of protective clothing, but I didn't escape, so I'm not cowardly, it's just God Just bless me, just like you.

Xuan Ye, what I said that day about hating you and regretting getting to know you were all angry words, I was too uncomfortable, my mind was full of missing you, missing you, I don’t want myself to miss you, I want to live a good life, but I can’t control it ..." Ersha looked at the distraught Xuan Ye next to the coffin: "My brain is sick, there is always a you that I fantasize about, he follows me every day, I can see and hear, but I can't touch, every time I One touch and you're gone.

In this case, why let me see you again, it is better to let me not see you.

Xuan Ye, I'm tired. I don't want to live a day like this.Now that Caifa's epidemic prevention is on the right track, Xuanyue has also come. With his medical skills, medicines, and the development of a vaccine, Caifa will be able to survive.

So, after doing what I should do, can I also choose what I want to do?

So, I'm here to find you, Xuan Ye. "

Ignoring the biting coldness on his body, Ersha climbed into the ice coffin and lay down beside Xuan Ye. As usual, he put his head on Xuan Ye's neck, and after posing in the most comfortable position, he took out a small knife and pointed at Xuan Ye. With a light swipe of his wrist, he closed his eyes contentedly.

Before his consciousness disappeared, he murmured: "Xuan Ye, don't blame me."

The next day, Jade woke up with a splitting headache, he didn't care about anything else, and ran to the door of Ersha's small courtyard: "Ersha, what do you have for breakfast?"

Two idiots... two idiots...

Called several times, the courtyard is still silent.

Arman was awakened by Jade's cry. He stepped out of the tent, stared blankly at everything in front of him, and suddenly yelled 'no', and rushed directly into the courtyard.

Fei Cui ran in after her, only to see that the room was empty, the bed was neatly covered, and there was no trace of sleeping at all.

"Where is the second fool?" Fei Cui's voice trembled, revealing a fear that he could not detect: "Where did the second fool go?"

Arman lowered his head and thought for a moment, then said, "Go to the ice room and have a look, Xuan Ye is there."

The two rushed to the ice room without stopping, only to see the door of the ice room was wide open, and Xuan Yue stood in front of the ice coffin in a daze.

The once transparent ice coffin was smudged into a dazzling bright red due to Ersha's blood. Inside the ice coffin, Ersha snuggled up to Xuan Ye, smiling sweetly and contentedly.

……

Fei Cui, don't blame me, and you don't need to castigate me, I've already castigated myself.

But I'm just tired... just want to rest.

I am a hypocrite, saying that love is not everything, but I can't bear the feeling of losing Xuan Ye.

I am a person who seeks pleasure, saying that time can solve all problems, but I don't want to calm down and wait for the grind of time.

I am a fickle person, saying that you and Zhuzi are my relatives, but I gave up you for others.

So Jade, don't feel sorry for me, you should be thankful that you saw the nature of my scum early and avoided greater harm.

But Alman is different, I can see that he will treat you well, just like Xuan Ye treated me.

Recently, I have been thinking about whether I will have any regrets if I die one day.

I thought about it for a long time, and found that the only regret was that when Xuan Ye was around, I didn't treat him well.

I was always self-willed and always lost my temper with him, because at that time I felt that we would have a long way to go, so I should bully and bully him more when we were young, so that when we were all old, I would Take good care of him and make up for him.

However, there is no chance.

So, Jade, don't dwell on the past, grasp the present and believe in the future.

Like the song I used to sing:

Love every day as if it were the end.

Cherish Arman, he is someone you should cherish.

I'm a scum, just forget it slowly.

Two stupid must write