I only like you as a paper man

Nakahara Chuya is still in a bad mood today.

Because he was tricked by his rival Dazai, that bastard again—this kind of thing has been happening continuously for almost half a month.He finally couldn't take it anymore, and ran to Dazai's house to ask for an explanation, just like a kicker.

He called Dazai's name, but no one answered.Normally, Dazai would have jumped out to battle with him long ago, could it be that he is not at home?No, that damned mackerel was probably hiding in his room.

Chuya thought so, and kicked open the door of Dazai's room again.

There, what he saw was—

Messy room, crumbling wine bottles, and messy clothes.

In addition, at Osamu Dazai's bedside, there was actually a girl who was handcuffed.

You sat on the bed, looked at each other awkwardly for a few seconds, and didn't know what to say for a while.

The same is true for the man opposite, although the words "I'm sorry to disturb you" and "Why is this guy Dazai handcuffed to a girl in his room!?" It is unclear whether it is the former or the latter.

If it was the former—even if he came to settle accounts with Dazai, the timing was too unfortunate.After all, Zhong also didn't have the evil intention of deliberately disturbing other people's interest.Having said that, does he still have this kind of interest? ? ?

If it's the latter - Osamu Dazai, you're such a scumbag!I, Nakahara Nakahara, a righteous and enthusiastic citizen of Yokohama, will not turn a blind eye!

"Please, can you help me unravel this...?"

Probably aware of the embarrassment that Chuya felt at the moment (after all, you also feel extremely embarrassed), you decided to ask for help first.

Yes—Chuya, who was going to answer like this, thought of another possibility the moment he raised his hand.

If you are an "enemy" handcuffed here by Dazai, that's a different story.

"What's your relationship with him?" Chuya asked you.

"Huh?" Originally you thought that Zhong would help you untie the handcuffs without saying a word (or crush the handcuffs), you were stunned, and you hesitated for a long time before answering, "...well, I don't know what Mr. Dazai and I should do. What is the relationship."

The circuit of the central brain after hearing your answer is as follows:

If the answer is "girlfriend" without hesitation, either it is a real girlfriend, or the enemy is just talking nonsense to confuse the public. There are only two possibilities.When the time comes, you just need to hand over the evidence.

But if you answer like this, doesn't it explain that - you are a poor girl whose feelings have been played by Dazai and have not even established a relationship yet! ?

Besides, you still look harmless to humans and animals, no matter how you look at it, you are just an ordinary girl.

"Then you were handcuffed here voluntarily?" he asked again.

"Of course not!" You shook your head desperately, "Although I promised Mr. Dazai that I would wait for him here, I don't want to be handcuffed at all! Do you know how painful my wrist is now! I am nothing Shaking M girl!!"

——And I can't hold it anymore, help me! ! !

What, isn't it!

Zhong Ye was shocked.

"What about the others?" Chuya continued to ask.

"Mr. Dazai said he was on a mission." You answered truthfully, "Maybe he won't be back until night...so I'm going to stay here and wait until he comes back."

"Tsk." Chuya smacked his lips angrily. Although he couldn't understand Dazai's behavior of playing with women in his hands when he was free, and caused many girls to cry for him, this is your private matter after all. , he is not good at interfering.

Nakaya bypassed the wine bottle that fell on the ground, walked towards you, stretched out his hand and crushed the handcuffs on the head of the bed.

When your left hand was finally freed from the cold utensil, you sighed: "I'm finally free, thank you!"

You look at your wrists that have been handcuffed for several hours. It may be because you just fell asleep and didn’t pay attention to the center of gravity of your left hand. The area around your left wrist has been reddened by the handcuffs.

Damn Osamu Dazai, I will settle accounts with you when I go back!

"Oh." Zhong also responded to you. Since Dazai is not here and there are guests at his house, he has no reason to continue to make trouble here. When he was about to leave the room and go back to continue his mission, he stopped again and turned his head. Look at you and say, "Let me give you a piece of advice."

"Huh?" You tilted your head and looked at Chuya, wondering why he said that, "What advice?"

"...Girls, don't spoil yourself casually." Nakaya turned his head, "That guy is not a good guy, and if he takes his rhetoric seriously, he will get hurt."

Oh--

You clapped your fists and fully understood the situation, Chuya thought you were a poor girl who was tricked by Osamu Dazai!

"Listen, listen to me..." Listen to my explanation, Mr. Chuya!Things are not as you imagined! !I'm not some poor girl who was tricked by Osamu Dazai! ! !

... Just when you were about to say this, you were interrupted by the ringtone of Chuya's cell phone.

The mobile phone in his pocket rang, and he picked up the phone after seeing you making the "please" gesture: "Boss is me, what's next?"

You should be lucky, fortunately, Mori Ogai just called to interrupt you at this time, otherwise you would have called Chuya's name out of the mouth.At that time, you have to spend time explaining to the people in front of you what is called anti-transmission, what is called a paper man, what is a literary hero and a little wild dog, and so on.

Maybe you will be handed over to the country by Chuya... Ah no, handed over to Mori Ogai.

"I see, I'm nearby, I'll be right there."

Zhong Ye closed his flip phone with a snap, and because time was urgent, he had no choice but to make a long story short, and summed it up as follows: "Girl, I advise you to cherish life, stay away from scumbags, and go back to your own home."

After speaking, he opened the bed curtain that had been closed tightly in Dazai's room, opened the floor-to-ceiling windows and jumped directly from the balcony.

...Ah, Mr. Nakaya can use supernatural powers, can he show me the feeling of flying?Bungee jumping is also good!

This is the only thought you have when you watch Chuya leaping down from the window sill.

In this way, if you meet Tuo Si in this world, then you...

Thinking of this, you couldn't help shivering, and immediately rolled out of bed and closed the French windows and curtains.After all, this is also the home of the Hong Kong gangster cadres, maybe someone got the information and arranged for snipers to stay here every day!You should really thank Nakahara Chuya for being merciful and not smashing the floor-to-ceiling windows when he left.

You ran to the door to check the entrance. Although the wall next to it had been dented by Zhong Ye, the door was lucky and could be closed.

For your own safety, you locked the door and rushed to the WC.

...Damn Osamu Dazai!How did he treat the blooming girl! !Don't the paper people in Two Stinging Apes all acquiesce that the hostages won't have some physiological needs when they are tied up! ?

In case you can't hold back alone, isn't it his bed that will suffer! ?

While cursing Kai in your heart, you opened Dazai's refrigerator.The expired bread he left you was hard and not tasty at all!

……

The moment you look inside the refrigerator, you fully understand why Dazai gave you bread that was about to expire.

Because there is nothing in his refrigerator, the bread that is about to expire is his last food.

You don't believe in evil, you ran into the kitchen and rummaged through the cabinets, and you just found a bowl of instant noodles from a corner of the kitchen.In a different (tai) world (zai) world (jia), even instant noodles can be considered top-quality ingredients.

It was only after you traveled to another world that you realized how kind you are to those uninvited guests!They have food and clothing in your house, and you offer all of them as treasures.

What about you?When you traveled to another world, you were handcuffed to the bed by Dazai, a heartless guy!When you go back, you must complain about Cream!

... You froze for a second, how should you complain about Nai Shuang after you go back?

"Let me tell you, Milk Cream! As soon as I traveled to the world of Wenhao Xiaoyegou, I was handcuffed to the bed by Hei Shizai!!!"

"What!?? You made a lot of money!! I'm so sore!!! What did he do to you!! Tell me now!!! I want to hear it!!! Can't wait!!!"

"Wait a minute, shouldn't you complain about Tuo Si being green at this time?"

"Grass! Who cares whether the hat on his head is white or green if you can listen to such an exciting story!!"

—It's bound to turn into a conversation like this, you think, when you're going to relay this to someone else and you're bound to be misunderstood.

Ugh.

Because you are free, you simply cleaned Dazai's house.Maybe this is the so-called motherhood, you can't leave your ineffective son alone, even if you curse, you have to take care of his daily life.

Thinking of Tuosi, your hand holding the broom stopped again.

What would happen if you traveled to Tosina instead of Dazai's house?

What would you be now if he didn't know you like everyone else and regarded you as suspicious?

How would he treat the suspicious and pitiful girl who appeared out of thin air.

... Eighty percent, probably, you are dead now.

Ugh.

You sigh again.

When you think about how you once said to Nai Shuang, "I am willing to die under Fei Jia's crime and punishment", your face hurts.

The mouth is happy for a while, and the face is slapped with regret.

evening.

Osamu Dazai, a Hong Kong black cadre, finally finished today's task and came to Lupin's bar where he often goes.

In fact, he could finish this task in half a day. However, he chose to spend more than half of his time on fishing. After all, it was not an urgent task, and it was not bad to finish it in half a day.

When he went down the stairs to the inside of the bar, he found his friend was already there.As usual, he sat in his seat and drank distilled wine. He raised his head when he heard Dazai's footsteps, and greeted him: "You are here too, Dazai."

"Yeah, Odasaku." Dazai replied with a light voice that was different from when he was working, sitting on the seat to Oda's left, "I finished work early today, so I wanted to come here to pass the time."

"Oh." Oda replied.

"The usual share."

As Dazai said, he and Oda began to chat about seemingly meaningless topics as usual.After he received the wine made by the bartender, he took a sip before asking, "Have you had any interesting experiences recently, Odasaku."

Oda shook the wine glass in his hand, thought for a while and replied: "...No, as usual, it's just dealing with groceries that others don't want to deal with."

"Really...?" Dazai looked at Oda and said to himself, "This is weird, Oda Saku doesn't look like he's hiding anything from me, but that kid doesn't look like he's lying either. "

"The kid?"

"Ah, the mysterious girl who suddenly appeared at my house this morning."

"Mysterious girl?" Oda said, "Is it the snail girl?"

"No, if I really want to talk about it, it should be the milk tea girl." Dazai laughed, "Hahaha... only Odasaku can think of the mysterious girl as the snail girl. In fact, I am doing it because of her today. came to find you."

"Looking for me?" Oda cast a puzzled look at Dazai.

When Oda listened to Dazai tell the whole story, he felt that some dusty memory seemed to resurface in his mind.

It was a life memory that he had forgotten but actually happened.

The author has something to say:

Nakaya OS: Dazai Osamu, I really can't think of you like to play prison/imprisonment games like S///M, tsk.

Chacha: ...I'm so wronged, I'm so wronged, Mr. Dostoevsky help! ...Hey, why did I ask him to save me?