How I was forced to be the villain

Being human, one cannot save others, nor can one be saved by others.

The first time Osamu Dazai saw that boy, he realized that the man standing in front of him was just pretending to be normal, his eyes had lingering desolation and emptiness, and there was nothing under this body that could be called For the soul of man.

Loathing him is like a natural instinct.

Many years later, Osamu Dazai realized that under the appearance of disgust, there was a deep fear of facing the existence that was like one body with two sides to himself, but beyond the fear, there was also a secret expectation.

Osamu Dazai tried his best to hate him as much as he hated himself, and he also expected him to find a way forward in the endless darkness. In that case, wouldn't it be... Even himself can find a way to continue as a human being? Hope on a long and hopeless journey.

The boy who is always with Chuya is a completely different existence from Chuya. Osamu Dazai has always felt that Kyono's approach to Nakahara Chuya and Oda Sakunosuke is for the purpose of taking advantage of him.

Osamu Dazai had seen the appearance of that person performing the mission, and when he followed the black lizard for the first time, he already looked like a qualified mafia.

Cold and cruel, he has completely integrated with the darkness, and joining the mafia is too easy for him.

Based on his age, Osamu Dazai even suspected that he was an undercover agent sent by other underworld forces.

The kind of killer character that was cultivated since childhood.

Then his purpose of approaching Nakahara Chuya may be to catch up with the port mafia, but Osamu Dazai has always wondered why he contacted Odasaku so naturally first, even if he could see through Odasaku's ability, It shouldn't be so fast.

During that time, Osamu Dazai cleaned up a lot of people, and indeed caught many undercover agents from other forces, but the investigations have nothing to do with Jingoyan.

Because of this, Osamu Dazai became more and more vigilant towards him. He hid it so deeply, and it didn't seem to come from any official organization. It must be an extremely secretive, powerful, and very cruel organization.

Osamu Dazai tried many methods to let him die naturally in the mission, but he resolved them all one by one with the strength of the opponent.

Kyono Yan didn't jump into the hole Dazai dug at all, until he shot so much that even Mori Ogai couldn't stand it, so he went to talk to Dazai Osamu.

The leader hiding in the shadows like a vampire said helplessly: "Dazai-kun really hates Kyono-kun, but it's not okay to do it like this. Kyono-kun can't die. If he dies, even Zhong will betray the organization." .”

If you want to work alone, the most basic thing is that you can't kill other people's relatives, otherwise you will only get an enemy full of hatred.

Dazai Osamu was not surprised, he looked at Mori Ogai quietly and said: "If this continues, maybe one day Mr. Mori will be silently killed by Kyono-kun."

He knows what Mori Ogai cares about the most, and he also knows what Mori Ogai is most worried about.

But Mori Ogai just sighed softly, and said helplessly: "That is nothing to do, but I need this knife very much now, Kyono-kun will become my sharpest knife, I don't care if this knife is here Who belonged to him before, but he can only belong to me in the future.”

"Dazai-kun, don't touch my sword."

Osamu Dazai has no doubts about calling Kyono Yan a "sword" at all. Kyono Yan is the most suitable person to be a "sword" in the hands of others. It is the favorite candidate of the big man.

However, after hearing Mori Ogai's words, Osamu Dazai wanted to laugh.

I didn't expect that people like Mr. Lian Sen would be deceived by that guy's appearance. If he really regarded Kyono Yan as a cold tool, sooner or later he would be backlashed by the tool.

That's definitely not a person who doesn't have his own thoughts and completely obeys orders. On the contrary, his purpose is very clear. In order to achieve his purpose, he doesn't care who becomes the knife, or... turns someone into a knife.

He's just going to be in the best position to do what [should] be done.

Even Osamu Dazai would be afraid of such an absolutely calm calculation, because he doesn't even care that his dignity is trampled under his feet, he doesn't care how embarrassed he is, he only cares about what to do.

A person who doesn't care about anything and doesn't care about means is certainly enough to scare everyone.

But what makes Osamu Dazai even more wary is the organization behind Kyono Yan, who can cultivate such a character can be seen from the people behind it.

In fact, Mori Ogai was far more cautious than expected. After that conversation, he also tried to test Kyono Yan, and arranged a chain of layouts, but Kyono Yan did not reveal any flaws, and has always been the favorite of the superiors. look like.

If it is Mori Ogai who has passed two years, he will definitely understand that such a temptation is meaningless to a "commander", and the other party can even counter him. It is more likely that he has already done so, but now, he is not enough Know what kind of person Kyono Yan is.

In addition to those undercurrents, Osamu Dazai also discovered a strange thing.

Jing Yeyan must have known what he was doing in secret, but the boy didn't hold any resentment towards him.When Osamu Dazai was ready to deal with the opponent's counterattack, everything was calm and incomprehensible.

especially......

The boy's dull eyes always became sparkling when looking at him.

......

"Why does the lifeless god become alive because of me?"

Sitting in front of the bar counter of the bar, Osamu Dazai propped his face, poking the ice hockey floating in the glass in boredom.

At that time, Ango Sakaguchi, who was still working as a social animal in the port mafia, carefully analyzed whether there was any hidden meaning in this sentence, such as code words and the like. Unfortunately, he found that it might just be a random emotion.

So he replied casually, "Maybe it's because the gods love you."

Ango Sakaguchi lowered his head, looked at the light refracted on the wine glass, and fell silent again.

He thought, if there were gods in this world, they wouldn't love a man like Dazai.

"Love?" Osamu Dazai tilted his head and laughed out loud, "No, no, that kind of picture is too funny, love or something... Humans can't do it, let alone expect gods to do it. Love humans."

Especially such a person, maybe even colder than a machine.

When such thoughts crossed his mind, Osamu Dazai suddenly remembered something.

At first, he wasn't going to let the boy leave that strange city alive, so he did it without hesitation when the time was right.

However, a person who should have been as despicable and cruel as him sent him back to a safe place with a smug smile, and stepped into his own death.

Can't understand, how can there be such a person?

He should have known he wanted his death, so...why?

Standing on the city wall, Osamu Dazai watched the thin figure get caught up in the storm, and the human body would soon be crushed. He was very puzzled. The boy looked at him for the last time, and there was no hatred as expected. , for the first time a proud and flamboyant smile appeared on that lifeless face, and dots of light lit up in the dark pupils, shining into the bottom of his heart.

Perhaps Osamu Dazai understood at that moment that although they are very similar, they have more profound differences.

Osamu Dazai couldn't understand Kyono's words, and the other party's responses were always beyond his expectations. Before he knew it, he put too much attention on him.

......

I killed that god with my own hands until the actual weight completely disappeared in my hands, leaving only a piece of air, as if there was no god in the world who favored someone like Osamu Dazai.

Osamu Dazai was very confused, as if a certain part of his body disappeared at that moment, he didn't know what to do.

He didn't even feel sad, just... confused.

Kyano really doesn't have the heart of a human being, and a monster that cannot be called a human lives in that body.

This kind of result is also what the gods hoped. That god is different from them. He loves someone with all his heart. If he dies like that, he must be happy.

I know it is so.

Osamu Dazai made more temptations. A person cannot completely become another person. Subconscious movements, folds of clothes, tone of voice and word habits, etc., are all unconsciously revealing their own information.

The gods hardly conceal the excessive similarities between themselves and Kyono Yan. In fact, you can tell it at a glance. Even if you cover your face, the pupils and hair color are different, and even your personality is much gentler. They are also very similar. .

Everyone knows that the death of a god does not mean the end, but a beginning.

Since then, not only Osamu Dazai, but almost all the forces paying attention to this matter have been secretly investigating.

A god who was in charge of hunting down, and an experimental product who escaped from a mysterious organization. Relying on these two pieces of information, a lot of power was used but not even a trace was found.

They did not doubt the authenticity of this incident, but increased the danger of this organization again and again. From a certain perspective, it is quite powerful to be able to hide without any trace at all.

Temporary grounding does not mean giving up, and it is also because of this that they can quickly find more information when they stumble upon a little clue later, and by the way, a conspiracy between humans and gods is involved, and the core of the conspiracy is Jingye. Word.

Although there is no clear news, but it is close enough for Osamu Dazai to be aware of it, such as the laboratory occasionally revealed by the other party, the strict discipline but more indifferent growth environment, and the boy's inexplicable more affection for Osamu Dazai than before. cooked.

It was as if he was instinctively getting along with Osamu Dazai in a more familiar way.

After a long time, it was proved that those gods who were killed were supported by Kyono Yan as a human heart. That organization did cruel things to him to make him what he is now. Killing gods can To return a man's heart to its owner.

The god who persistently wanted to keep Osamu Dazai in the world, perhaps because of the lost love of a young man, was influenced by the ontology who had been chasing Osamu Dazai, and lingered by his side.

A body stared at Osamu Dazai persistently. Although he had no human heart, he kept approaching him instinctively.

A doppelgänger that represents the ability to love someone, stays by Osamu Dazai's nostalgic side.

No matter how malicious he was to the young man and put him in a dangerous situation, the gaze that he looked over from the beginning to the end carried a scorching heat that Dazai Osamu could not look directly at.

Even if someone manipulated him as a weapon, he still wanted to join the port mafia, he would go to Dazai Osamu's side even if his head was broken, he was clumsy, he didn't even know the meaning of life, but he still tried his best to kill him again and again. Pulled from death.

Osamu Dazai has nothing worth plotting like this, then the answer is already obvious.

He is obviously such a smart person, but in some respects he is simply frighteningly clumsy, all he knows is to look at him expectantly...

What a fool.

After Oda did something, Osamu Dazai realized that he could not embrace this little fool now, the dark world would only make Ah Yan constantly hurt, and in the end the only way to go was death, what Oda said was right , Only by going to the bright side can he protect his Ah Yan.

But for the time being, he can only continue to show the illusion that the two are hostile in front of Mr. Sen.

Once Kyono Yan and Dazai Osamu stand on the side, Mori Ogai will definitely try his best to attack them. Picking out any one of them is enough to make him sleepless at night, let alone these two people are still together?

I'm afraid Mori Ogai will be on pins and needles just staying in the port.

After Oda Sakunosuke's accident, Osamu Dazai defected.

Everything was planned very well, the only thing I didn't expect was that Ah Yan defected with him simply and neatly.

It turned out that it was really because of him that he joined the port mafia.

Osamu Dazai was surrounded by sour emotions. After seeing Ah Yan joining the organization and coming to him, he felt at a loss for the first time.

She wanted to hug him into her arms, melt into her flesh and blood, never let go, kiss from hair to chin, calm his anger bit by bit, so that he couldn't think of leaving him.

But Osamu Dazai did nothing, choosing to introduce the prey patiently into his arms step by step.

……

Seeing Oda Tsukuru who should have died but was miraculously alive in front of him, Osamu Dazai was instantly enveloped in great joy.

Oda Saku told him, "It was Yan who brought me back from hell."

Osamu Dazai thought that before he defected, Ah Yan ran up to him and seriously said that he would wait for him, his heart suddenly throbbed.

"Idiot! Idiot! Why..."

Oda Sakunosuke looked at Osamu Dazai who suddenly covered his eyes with his hands and didn't know what to say, so he went over and patted him on the shoulder, "I am very grateful to Yan for bringing the souls of the dead back to the world, just saying that It is already a very difficult thing to come out, and you must pay a heavy price, not to mention there are five children."

"Although it's not obvious, in fact, Ah Yan should like me very much, and also like the Central Plains cadres, but you are different to him," Oda Sakunosuke said with emotion, "It's very strange to have such a person in life. It's easy, cherish it, Dazai."

In the past, Oda Sakunosuke always felt that Dazai was wandering outside the world, no matter what group he was in, he was a lonely and desperate person, and this kind of despair would accompany him throughout his life, and he would never be able to get rid of it, but now, there appeared One person can lead him out of the gloomy and hopeless world and into the bright future.

At the beginning, Sakunosuke Oda didn't think that these two people would be happy together. Wouldn't it be more desperate for two hopeless people to be together?

But he underestimated Ah Yan's determination, and he didn't expect such a result.

Now he finally believes that these two people may be born to find each other.

"Don't worry, Odasaku, I will definitely protect Ah Yan."

Dazai Osamu felt a kind of indescribable panic in his heart when he said this—the panic that no matter how hard he tried, he would not be able to keep the existence he wanted to keep the most.

......

Maybe they should have had a lot of time.

But... No matter how you try to stop it, you have finally reached that step.

When he knew of the existence of the sect, Osamu Dazai had already imagined that there would be such a day.

In the final battle, Osamu Dazai immediately realized something was wrong when he saw a smile on his lips, but it was too late.

With Ah Yan's current strength, it shouldn't take so much effort to deal with them. From the very beginning...has he had this idea?

"Dazai, I will really kill you." The already weak man murmured.

"The world will really end."

"The world you exist in is actually not bad, and I like it very much."

It is so, it is so.

Ah Yan has always been protecting him.

Osamu Dazai really wanted to tell Ah Yan that it was okay, but he knew that Ah Yan would care, and he hoped that he could live on in this world that Ah Yan gave his life to protect.

When the weight of the body disappeared in his arms, Osamu Dazai tightened his arms vigorously, but there was only a piece of air left, just like when the god died.

"It's like a nightmare all over again."

He raised his head and looked at the sky exposed by the broken roof, the sunlight penetrating the palace was frighteningly cold.

After that incident, Yokohama returned to normal one after another. The trauma did not leave much, and people soon forgot about that incident.

Osamu Dazai did not return to the detective agency.

No matter what you do, it's pointless.

He sank into the icy river, drifted along the current to an unknown place, jumped from tall buildings, or took medicines at will, and hung his head on the rope tied to the tree... . Even doing these things is meaningless, he can only feel the cold that comes with the passing of body temperature.

Later, the Armed Detective Agency received several similar disappearance cases in a row, and finally found an organization that had built a deep profit network by relying on the miracle of immortality and resurrection of the dead.

Edogawa ranpo found Osamu Dazai.

"The miracle of resurrecting the dead may be related to Ah Yan."

Others don't know, but both of them understand that the news that appeared in Yokohama is not groundless.

There is indeed a person in the world who has the miraculous ability to resurrect the dead.

Looking at Osamu Dazai who seemed to be dead, Edogawa Ranpo said calmly, "Do you really think that Yan is dead?"

"A man like that won't just die like this. Even if he climbs out of hell, he has to crawl back. If even his soul is turned into ashes, he has to struggle to rekindle the flame from the ashes. He is such a person."

Before leaving, Edogawa Ranpo took one last look at Osamu Dazai.

As long as it can leave him with a little hope, even if this hope is insignificant and fragile.

What Edogawa Ranpo didn't expect was that this firefly wish came true.

Osamu Dazai, who became a new executive after infiltrating the underground organization, came to a secret underground bar.

In the box with the curtain slightly raised, in the half-light and half-darkness, a figure engraved in his heart came into view.

Put down the curtain, drive away the extra people, and then open the heavy curtain again and walk in.

The sound of his heart beating was extremely loud, but Dazai Osamu remained calm and sat beside that person.

Meeting a pair of familiar eyes, Osamu Dazai thought, what Mr. Ranpo said was right, even hell Ayan would crawl out.

Then come and meet him.

"I will never let you leave again this time, Ah Yan."

He murmured softly, and the person who fell asleep in his arms was not disturbed at all.