i love you after all

In the evening, it rained in this seaside city.

After waiting for Chu Qiu to eat, Danjin ate a few mouthfuls hastily by herself, and Chu Qiu asked her to eat more, but she only said that she had no appetite.

Dan Jin took the wheelchair to the window, opened the window, and watched the rain outside the window without saying a word.While she was watching the rain, Chu Qiu's eyes fell on her unscrupulously.

The pale skin in the twilight, the thin fingers on the armrest, the thinner shoulders in the hospital gown.Obviously this woman is sitting alive in front of her eyes, so real that she can hear her every weak breath, but she just feels like she can't grasp anything, her hand, or her heart , even the curls like seaweed hair tail can not be grasped.

No matter where she is, no matter what happens, she always exudes this ethereal and unreal beauty.

The less real it is, the more insane it is.

"What are you looking at?" Chu Qiu leaned on the hospital bed, looking lazily at Dan Jin.

"I'm in a daze." Dan Jin turned her head and replied frankly.

"Cough..." Chu Qiu coughed twice, then chuckled, "Are you still thinking about Sister Yanran?"

Dan Jin shook his head: "No."

But Chu Qiu said as if he didn't hear it: "If you regret it, it's not too late to find her now."

"Really?" Danjin controlled the wheelchair to turn to the hospital bed, and drove towards Chuqiu, with a soft smile on his lips, "But, I just want to be with you now."

Although this was indeed the answer he had expected, Chu Qiu still couldn't control the acceleration of his heartbeat after hearing this.

She turned her head to the side, her ears were a little red, "You're treating me like a child again."

"I didn't treat you like a child." Dan Jin chuckled, "Really."

Chu Qiu couldn't help laughing, looked sideways at Dan Jin, and said, "Sitting in a wheelchair all the time, won't my back hurt? Why don't you lie down beside me."

"When you say that, it seems to be really painful."

Danjin supported the wheelchair and stood up on one leg. Chu Qiu hurriedly tried to help her, but her hands were covered with gauze, so she had to hand out her arms.Dan Jin took a look, but didn't hold Chu Qiu's forearm, but slowly sat up on the edge of the bed.

"You don't have to do this," Chu Qiu frowned, "You rely on yourself for everything, even if you don't want me to help you, you can rely on me."

"I'm afraid of touching your hand."

The hospital bed was not very big, Dan Jin lay down next to Chu Qiu, laying on the same pillow with her, smiling softly.

Chu Qiu was silent for a while, then stubbornly repeated in a low voice: "You can rely on me."

Dan Jin gently looked at Chu Qiu's side face, stared at the stubbornness and firmness in those young eyes, and suddenly a thought flashed in her heart.

I can rely on her.

Tanjin then smiled again.

What is she thinking?For half of my life, I have been alone so far, and my parents and elders have nothing to rely on, so how can I rely on a half-grown child.

"What are you laughing at?" Chu Qiu also lay on his side, facing Dan Jin very close, "Laughing at me."

Dan Jin lowered her eyes, not quite used to seeing people so close to each other, there was still a smile on her lips: "Laugh at your cuteness."

"Then do you like cute people?"

Chu Qiu raised her eyebrows.

Danjin answered naturally: "Yes."

"Lovely people also like you." Chu Qiu paused, then suddenly smiled, "I like you, Dan Jin."

The smile on Danjin's lips froze immediately.

She didn't know why, but her thoughts went wrong again.

like?Which do you like?

Chu Qiu stared closely at Dan Jin's eyes, and his voice was so soft that it seemed a bit ambiguous: "Who have you ever liked?"

Like... Who do you like?

"Why are you in a daze again?" Chu Qiu smiled lightly, resting his chin on Dan Jin's shoulder naturally, sniffing the jasmine fragrance on her body secretly with the tip of his nose, "Is it true that I have liked too many boys before, and I can't count them all?" gone."

Dan Jin replied softly: "No."

"I don't believe it." Chu Qiu half-closed his eyes, a little pupil exposed under the eyelashes was shattered, "I'm not like you, Dan Jin. I only liked one person, and in the rest of my life... I will only like that one person. "

"Who is it?" Dan Jin frowned, "Is it a male student in your class?"

Chu Qiu looked at her and didn't speak.After a while, he laughed at himself like a self-deprecating.

What a woman with a bad memory.

Apparently half a minute ago, she just said - "I like you, Danjin."

Seeing that Chu Qiu didn't answer, Dan Jin said again: "You are still young, don't talk about your life. Life is so long, how do you know if you will like others."

Chu Qiu just smiled lightly, rubbed the hospital gown on Dan Jin's shoulder with the tip of his nose, and changed the topic: "...It's the first time I'm lying on the bed so close to you."

Danjin's thoughts were taken away by her: "Didn't you sleep together before?"

"But you are far away from me, and the last time I was just touching your arm." Chu Qiu sighed, and his voice became softer, "Can't you let me hug you once?"

Dan Jin was silent, frowning slightly, his brain suddenly became confused.Her instinct was to refuse, but at the same time another instinct was born telling her not to refuse.

"Erlangshen is not here, my arms are empty, I will have nightmares at night." Chu Qiu sighed again, "Just watching my sister have nightmares like this, what a cruel sister."

"You..." Dan Jin was speechless.

"Hug." Chu Qiu's voice is as soft as the colorful cotton candy sold by the cart peddler at the school gate, carrying warm breath, blowing to Dan Jin's ear, "Hug."

"...Just this time." Danjin finally compromised in the confusion in her chest.

Chu Qiu hurriedly opened her arms to her, "Come."

Dan Jin hesitated for a moment, then leaned carefully into Chu Qiu's arms, thoughtfully avoiding Chu Qiu's injured hand, tidied up her neckline and clothes, and tidied up her long hair bit by bit, before gently The ground pillow lay on Chu Qiu's arm.

The thin silhouette, the cold skin, and the steady fragrance are all held in her arms at this moment.

She finally caught one.

The moment she hugged Dan Jin, Chu Qiu felt the urge to cry and tell her I love you.

Danjin just lay there stiffly.She has never hugged anyone so closely. She has an abnormal family and an abnormal relationship, so she has no chance of such a fitting hug from her parents or lover.She was doing something she had never done before, perhaps because she tried it for the first time, and she was a little at a loss because of the unfamiliarity.

"Tanjin, we..."

The second half of the courtship words are almost on the lips.

"Ok?"

Dan Jin replied in a low voice.

"We..." Chu Qiu's voice trembled slightly, even his body trembled slightly, "I, we..."

A thought suddenly flashed in Dan Jin's mind, she seemed to know what Chu Qiu was going to say next.But she immediately denied herself, it was a crazy idea.

"Let's... let's sleep. I'm sleepy."

The truth is not as smooth as in the TV drama, and she is far less courageous than the protagonist in the drama.

"……Um."

Danjin was hugged with proper strength and carefully, and she just snuggled up next to the warm body of a 17-year-old girl. There are slender arm bones behind her head, a snow-white neck in front of her eyes, and a wide neckline that rises and falls with her breath. clavicle.She thought she would be uncomfortable being hugged, but now she didn't feel that uncomfortable embarrassment at all, and even began to feel that such a clean hug was so comfortable that she felt sleepy.

Gradually, she became really sleepy.

Tam Kam had a dream.

A dream that does not fit in the arms of a girl.

It was gray at first, and she was in a daze for a while before realizing that she was staring at the concrete floor.She rolled her eyes and saw that she was holding a small knife in her hand.

She remembered that this was the day she was about to commit suicide.

She looked at her immature wrist, and slowly put the knife on it.The blade paused for a moment on the skin, then she shook her head again and took it off.

Dan Zhanfeng is back.He slammed the thick iron door shut, looking at her while arranging the keys.

"Why aren't you dead? You bastard."

She panicked and looked to the other corner of the room.The mother squatted in the corner, her arms wrapped around her knees, and she looked towards this side with a blank expression, her eyes were as cold as ice.

So she picked up the knife again and put it on her wrist tremblingly.

She knew everyone wanted her dead.The blade was lowered, raised again, lowered again, raised again.Dan Zhanfeng kept urging her: "Cut quickly, hurry up!"

The mother in the corner was also staring closely at the knife in her hand, her eyes getting colder and colder.

She couldn't help crying, shaking all the time.The knife finally settled down on the skin, slowly, slowly cutting in.

The moment the blade pierced the skin, a lot of blood flowed out, and there were sickle-shaped fragments in the blood.She held her hands in a panic, trying to stop the blood, but she couldn't stop them no matter what.The more she cried, the more anxious she became, the more anxious she became, the more bewildered she became, as confused as a bug caught in a spider's web.

Suddenly a hand grabbed her wrist tightly.

That hand was wrapped in layers of gauze, and it was held too tightly, as if wishing to use these gauzes to protect her wound.

"Tanjin?"

A familiar voice called her.

"Danjin, wake up."

Awake?

"Don't cry...don't cry..."

Dan Jin opened his eyes abruptly.

She was still lying in Chu Qiu's arms, but at some point, her tears flowed all over her face.Chu Qiu hugged her tightly in his arms and kept stroking her back, his voice full of distress.

Dan Jin was stunned for 3 minutes before recovering from the nightmare just now.

But after waking up, he inexplicably fell into deeper despair.She stared at Chu Qiu's shoulder, frowned, and didn't want to think about anything, leaned forward slightly, and hugged Chu Qiu's body without reservation.

Dan Jin was buried in Chu Qiu's shoulder, crying tremblingly.Chu Qiu was in a hurry, but she didn't know what to do, so she could only hug Danjin and coax her non-stop: "Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry, don't cry..."

This was the first time she saw Dan Jin cry.

And wept so hard that he almost collapsed.

"I'm sorry..." Chu Qiu really didn't know what to say, and started apologizing nonsense in a hurry, although she didn't know what kind of apology she was saying, "I, I don't know... right... no, I ……how should I do……"

Dan Jin's hand resting on Chu Qiu's shoulder was tightly clenched, until the knuckles were bluish white and raised high.

"I..." Chu Qiu took a deep breath, tried his best to stabilize his voice, and said word by word: "Dan Jin, don't be afraid. I'm by your side, I'll always be by your side."

She knew she was vulnerable, from the first day she read that diary.She also knew that she would never show her vulnerability to anyone, not even Xiaoqian.But this night, she was willing to commit herself to crying wantonly in her arms.

Danjin didn't say a word, just hugged Chuqiu and cried, like hugging the only wooden pillar when drowning.She curled herself up in her arms, fully exposing her pain and cowardice to her. She didn't cry like a 30-year-old woman at all. At this moment, she seemed to be just the seven-year-old Xiao Danjin.

Chu Qiu kept whispering a word in her ear.

"Don't be afraid, I'm here."

Dan Jin once told her - "Don't cry in the dark".

She said that those who only dare to cry through darkness are extremely pitiful people.

Poor man.

Chu Qiu forgot how long Danjin cried that night, and also forgot when she fell asleep.She only remembered that when Dongfang vomited, she woke up sleepily, and the sea fog was no longer in her arms.

Everything is like a dream of my own delusion.

The only evidence is the tear on the pillow that is still wet in the morning.

The author has something to say: ["Don't weep in the dark." from Shakespeare's "The Tempest"]

Tonight is a crying baby