Goldberg Variations

Such a direct and naked confession was completely beyond Pei Wen's expectations, and he stared at Gu Kai in amazement.

Gu Kai stared at him without dodging, as if expressing his determination in this way.

In the end, it was Pei Wen who was the first to lose, and looked away.He instinctively wanted to escape, but he knew he couldn't say nothing, otherwise it would be too much.

But what should he say?

"I..." Pei Wen couldn't open his mouth to refuse, the long silence made him feel a little suffocated.

Realizing that he might have put too much pressure on Pei Wen, Gu Kai slowed down his tone: "I'm not forcing you to give me the answer now..."

"sorry."

Before he could finish speaking, Pei Wen suddenly responded.

The resolute refusal made Gu Kai stunned for two seconds, and immediately realized what this "sorry" meant.

Pei Wen refused.

Gu Kai's eyes darkened, he wanted to smile as usual, but he didn't, and forced the corners of his lips:

"...What's the reason?"

Pei Wen just shook his head, lowered his head and didn't dare to look at him, and said almost incoherently:

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry...it's not your fault, it's my own."

"You're fine, you haven't done anything wrong, but I can't, can't accept you, I'm sorry..."

After speaking, Pei Wen's voice became lower and lower, almost choking.

"Pei Wen," Gu Kai couldn't help holding his wrist, "Don't get excited, if there is anything, please tell me, okay?"

"No matter what the problem is, your problem or my problem, only by talking about it can it be solved. If you don't talk about it, he will always be there."

"I know you don't have feelings for me."

"No..." Pei Wen refused to admit it, trying to pull his wrist out.

Gu Kai didn't let go.

"Let me go." Pei Wen said.

"Pei Wen..."

"Let go of me!" Pei Wen suddenly flew into a rage and pulled out his hand.

He felt a burst of anger out of thin air, and the anger instantly occupied all his reason, as if Gu Kai had done something unforgivable.

Gu Kai was stunned by the yelling.

Ever since he knew Pei Wen, Gu Kai had never seen him speak to others in such a tone.

In just the next second, Pei Wen came back to his senses, realized what he had done, and also noticed the confusion and hurt in Gu Kai's eyes.

When Pei Wen blinked, his eye circles turned red.

His lips trembled, feeling guilty and remorseful, his eyes quickly filled with tears.

"...I'm sorry." He reluctantly said.

Resisting not to cry in front of Gu Kai, Pei Wen turned his face away, held the doorknob, and said hoarsely, "Open the door."

Gu Kai was completely frightened by Pei Wenyi's continuous reactions. He didn't understand why Pei Wen suddenly got angry, and he didn't know why Pei Wen suddenly cried, so he instinctively opened the door.

Pei Wen put Bach down and got out of the car.

His footsteps did not stop at all, and his thin and thin back was quickly engulfed by the night, completely invisible.

Under the dim light on the roadside of the neighborhood, Gu Kai sat on the spot for a while.

After a long time, he took out a cigarette and lit it, taking a deep breath.

Cigarettes calmed his restlessness well.

Gu Kai closed his eyes, leaned on the back of the chair, held the steering wheel with his left hand, tapped his index finger on the steering wheel, as if he was thinking about something.

After smoking a cigarette, Gu Kai glanced again in the direction of Pei Wen's departure in the night, but he didn't see that person in the crowd.

Pei Wen is gone and will not come back.

Gu Kai didn't try to catch up, but turned around with the steering wheel and drove home.

He has always been the one who took the initiative, and was pushed away constantly, and he was also a little tired.

On the other side, after Pei Wen got off the car, he ran until Gu Kai couldn't see him, then slowed down and walked slowly in the neighborhood.

It was not too late at this time, and there were still many residents coming in and out of the community.

There are young mothers walking with prams, old men and women walking together after dinner, and children running around screaming after school.

Looking at those children, Pei Wen suddenly remembered that one day in the hospital, he was hit by a child and threw himself into Gu Kai's arms.

At that time, there was a pleasant fragrance coming from Gu Kai's body, which was the clear and refreshing smell of cedar.

That was the first time he fell in love with Gu Kai.

Pei Wen is not slow, on the contrary, his introverted and reserved personality made him observe the reactions of others more and reflect on his every behavior.

He knew very well that he liked Gu Kai very early on.

But he is inferior and timid, even if he likes it, he still refuses to say it.

He knew that if Gu Kai dated him, he would definitely dislike him soon.

The tip of his nose seemed to smell the smell of cedar again. Pei Wen suddenly turned around and saw a cedar tree.

It's the one outside his window.

Tall, tall, steady, calm... just like the feeling Gu Kai gave him.

Gu Kai... Pei Wen looked at the cedar tree and said the name silently.

The tears that were about to fall in the car just now finally fell uncontrollably in the darkness where no one saw.

He thought that he had just yelled at Gu Kai.

Gu Kai treated him so well, and he even yelled at Gu Kai, why would he yell at Gu Kai?

He couldn't control his emotions.

A strong sense of remorse and guilt overwhelmed him, and he felt like a sinner.

My heart ached dully.

It was a very familiar pain, like being held tightly by a hand.Every day, this pain followed him like a shadow, always appearing unexpectedly, without any symptoms.So much so that Pei Wen sometimes even wondered if he had a heart attack, otherwise why would he be in such pain?

A black figure suddenly appeared under the cedar.

The figure stood there indifferently, looking at him gloomyly, as if it would pounce over and tear Pei Wen to pieces at any moment.

Pei Wen's pupils shrank, his scalp exploded, and cold sweat broke out on his back.

However, upon closer inspection, the figure disappeared again, as if it had never existed.

Pei Wen shuddered slightly in horror.

Hallucinations, hallucinations, all hallucinations... he told himself, trying to use reason to overwhelm the unnecessary fear.

But his feet ran uncontrollably.

Pei Wen rushed into the unit building, and the short minute in the elevator seemed as long as he had already died.

He leaned against the corner of the elevator, his pupils trembling, watching everything around him.

That black shadow, he is still there, he is still there, still watching him.

This realization made Pei Wen clench his fists.

"Ding!"

When the floor arrived, the elevator door opened silently.

Pei Wen rushed out, opened the door of his house in a panic, and quickly closed the door after entering the house.

"Snapped!"

The light in the living room was on.

The bright and pale lights instantly dispelled all the darkness, but Pei Wen did not relax. He nervously searched every corner of the room.

After confirming that there was no shadow, he leaned against the door exhaustedly, and then slid down the door panel.

Pei Wen fell to his knees, tears streaming down his face.

Drop after drop, slap, slap, fell on the clean floor, leaving round water marks one after another.

The room is very quiet, very quiet, but the community outside the window is very noisy, full of cheerful atmosphere of life in the world.

But those joys had nothing to do with him.

He fell sideways on the ground, his thin body curled up, tears stained his pale face.

He knew that it was time for him to take medicine, and he would feel better after taking medicine, at least not in such pain as now.

His emotions will be withdrawn, and he will become like a stranger, staring at himself and others coldly.

But he doesn't want to move.

It should be said that he couldn't move.

His body was as stiff and heavy as a piece of wood, and he couldn't even lift a finger.

He just wants to stay here until the end of time.

If tomorrow doesn't come, that's fine.

作者有话要说：今天裴温发病了，唉。感谢在2021-01-1421:00:45~2021-01-1520:23:05期间为我投出霸王票或灌溉营养液的小天使哦~

Thanks to the little angel who threw the mine: Loser Book 1;

Thank you very much for your support, I will continue to work hard!