Can't Save the World by Pretending to be Dead

Lian Xi's life, since graduating from university, has been filled with two words——

Salted fish.

Because he could see ghosts since he was a child, he couldn't get along with children of the same age, and everyone regarded him as a freak.Later, the people around him passed away one by one, and everyone gradually alienated him.When he arrived at the orphanage, he failed to make a new friend, and instead lived himself as an autistic orphan.

Lianxi once thought that he had gone to the underworld after his death, and the judge opened the book of life and death, and there should be a bloody "miserable" engraved on it.But when he went to university, he had to live in a dormitory, and had to work part-time to earn tuition and living expenses, so he had to make a few friends.Life has also changed from a capitalized "miserable" character to a fresh and fresh salted fish.

It's really good to be a salted fish.

Just swipe the mobile phone every day, play games, live broadcast on time until [-] o'clock in the evening, and earn some game boosting fees every month.

Lianxi stepped into retirement ahead of schedule, drank coke and soaked wolfberries, and imitated the old man's plate of walnuts, and his life was extremely beautiful.

It's a pity, it would be better if we could buy a suite.

Are you sick of salted fish?

Isn't it good to eat, drink and have fun?

If it weren't for the golden light of the boss, who would want to go out to catch ghosts every night!

That's right, the only motivation for Lian Xi to go out every night to catch ghosts and reincarnate is the golden light!

Every time Hei Wuchang goes out on business with Hei Wuchang, Hei Wuchang will be in a good mood when he comes back.At that time, Hei Wuchang always looks at the proof of impermanence with satisfaction, and Lian Xi gets a grain of golden light.There is a tacit understanding and a happy cooperation.But since the golden light number reached the standard and fully deducted the red light crisis brought by the homeless and Mao Maojiang incident to Lian Xi, Lian Xi relaxed again and became a salted fish.

This month, he was very inactive in catching ghosts, fooling Boss Li casually every day, and didn't take Boss Bo at ease at all.

Just kidding, who is a serious person to catch ghosts?

And now...

Why does he have to have a KPI (performance appraisal) even when he is a game anchor!

Don't do it, don't do it even if you die!

Looking at the certificate of black impermanence that hit his face, and the gleaming performance rankings of ghosts, Lian Xi's mouth twitched, his eyes closed, he turned to look at Su Jiao, and changed the subject abruptly: "You Did you buy dinner?"

Su Jiao: "Huh?"

My roommate is a fool, nothing, nothing, tacit, agreement!

Lian Xi felt impotent and furious, wishing he could quickly find a place to pretend to be dead, as if he didn't know about this inexplicable performance ranking.

He moved his face to the left, avoiding the proof of impermanence handed over by Chen Chen.

Jichen slightly raised his eyebrows, and moved his hands to the left.

Lian Xi moved his face to the right.

Ji Chen moved his hand to the right again.

In the spacious and bright living room, the two moved their heads and hands.

Whoosh whoosh.

go left!go right!go left!go right!

Su Jiao on the side looked at it for a long time: "Are you guys playing with that emoji?"

Jichen lowered his head, only seeing the back of the young man's hairy head.Lian Xi's face was blocked by fine hair, he was determined to play dead.

Looking at this scene, the man's eyes dimmed.

Lian Xi was meditating in his heart, "Don't take me as a social animal, don't take me as a social animal", the next second, suddenly, a pair of cold and thin hands caressed his cheeks.Lian Xi paused, the warm skin on his cheeks touched the extremely cold fingertips, making all the hairs on his back stand up in an instant.The owner of these hands held his face like this, forcing him to look up and look at himself.

The clear and beautiful eyes of the young man fell into a pair of deep and deep eyes.

Jichen's eyes are always devoid of emotion, and at a glance, there is only desolation and indifference that cannot be seen to the end.Su Jiao always complains in private that the nigger almost has a pair of ugly fish eyes, Xiao Liu is blind to fall in love with him.

However, with their eyes facing each other, the man bent down and looked at Lian Xi.

The extremely close distance made the two seem to be able to feel each other's warm exhalation.

...these eyes are really beautiful.

Lian Xi's lips moved, but he didn't speak.

What he didn't expect was that after Jichen supported his face and forced him to look up, Jichen didn't speak.

A short gaze is as long as a century.

Lian Xi: "...Is there something wrong?"

There was a strange heat coming from the fingertips, which made it a little numb. Looking at the young man with bright eyes in front of him, his Adam's apple moved slightly.

The next moment, Ji Chen said, "I'm not active in catching ghosts."

Lian Xi: "???"

Ji Chen: "There is a problem with thinking."

Lian Xi: "..."

President Xi stroked Lian Xi's cheek, grieved but said expressionlessly: "I feel ashamed of us!"

Lian Xi: "..."

Don't, don't lose yours, don't be ashamed to take out a loan for me.

As if realizing that the new Bai Wuchang he found really didn't seem to be self-motivated, Ji Chen let go of his hand, and Lian Xi was finally free.

Lian Xi, who had regained his life and thought he had successfully pretended to be dead, did not notice that Master Hei Wuchang suddenly turned his head and looked at Su Jiao who was eating melons and watching the show.

Su Jiao's whole body tensed up immediately.

Dangerous!

If Bai Wuchang doesn't work hard, wouldn't it be good to change to Bai Wuchang?

President Xi was thinking in his heart that he knew that he should reach out to Lian Xi to get back the Bai Wuchang certificate and hand it to Su Jiao, but he lowered his head and looked at Lian Xi, and by chance, Lian Xi also looked up at him.

Under the gorgeous sunset, the black-haired young man was taken aback for a moment, swallowed his saliva, and asked, "Is there anything else?" He said in his heart: Don't pull me into being a social animal, don't pull me into being a social animal together!

Ji Chen: "..."

You hand over the white impermanence certificate.

It seems that there is no way to say this sentence.

Mr. Xi's eyes swept back and forth between Lian Xi and Su Jiao.

Lian Xi and Su Jiao: "???"

Meow meow, what's the matter?

Mr. Hu suddenly realized.

"Forget it, he's too ugly."

Lian Xi: "?" Who is too ugly?

Su Jiao: "?" Who is ugly?Anyway, I can't be ugly.

President Xi took a deep look at Lian Xi, then turned around and walked to his room, leaving behind Lian Xi and Su Jiao who were confused.

Yes, the reason why he didn't want to get the Bai Wuchang certificate from Lian Xi was because Su Jiao was too ugly!Going out with Su Jiao to catch ghosts every day pollutes the eyeballs and affects the mood.In the future, if there is a Taoist monk who is pleasing to the eye, it will not be too late to ask Lian Xi for the certificate of impermanence.

He always came out abruptly, and returned very freely.

Lian Xi thought he had escaped, so he got up and decided to go to the kitchen to get a bottle of Coke to calm down the panic.However, he had just walked halfway, when suddenly he saw a faint red light floating in the air, dangling unsteadily, and under Lian Xi's shocked gaze, it plunged headlong into his body.

Lian Xi: "!"

Fuck, he actually forgot about the inexplicable bad luck of the opposite door Gao!

Lian Xi hurried forward and called Hei Wuchang: "Well, Mr. Hei Wuchang, when are we going out to catch ghosts tonight?"

Master Heiwuchang, who was extremely disappointed with his colleagues, turned around and gave him a cold look: "Whatever."

Lian Xi: "..."

Lian Xi laughed and said, "It's still twelve o'clock?"

Jichen: "Oh."

Lian Xi: "..."

After a while.

Lian Xi: "Are you angry?"

Ji Chen: "Huh?"

Lian Xi: "...angry?"

Ji Chen: "No."

Lian Xi: "..."

What the hell are those golden lights who are pulling your clothes stubbornly, as if they are afraid to fly a millimeter more towards me!

According to this pulling force, it means that even if I go out to catch ghosts with you for a month, these golden lights will not pay me any attention!

Make a salted fish.

easy.

But what he wants to do is not a salted fish who eats bugs in takeaway, steps on dog shit when he goes out, and bumps into actors in rankings!

Lian Xi gritted his teeth: "It's too embarrassing!"

Su Jiao in the living room: "???"

Heiwuchang's eyes suddenly lit up: "Huh?"

Lian Xi took a deep breath, filled with righteous indignation, and hated him deeply: "Jiangsu, Zhejiang and Shanghai's 25 cities, ranking No. 20! This 25 is hitting you in the face, it's hitting me in the face! Shameful! Shameful! I can't bear it!"

Ji Chen looked at Lian Xi's twisted and struggling expression, his eyes moved slightly, and the corners of his mouth curled into an imperceptible arc.He said meaningfully: "So?"

Lian Xi resolutely said: "I can't go on like this." He quickly took out his Bai Wuchang certificate, turned to the leaderboard, "set a small goal for yourself first." As he spoke, he looked up at Ji Chen.

Ji Chen also looked at him.

The two suddenly felt that the two sides had reached an agreement at this moment.

Lian Xi: "Get rid of Wuxi!"

Jichen: "Kill Yancheng!"

"..."

"..."

Lian Xi pointed to the leaderboard and kindly reminded: "Master Heiwuchang, Wuxi Guicha is currently ranked 24th in the Jiangsu, Zhejiang and Shanghai regions, which is one rank higher than us, with 2000 points more. Look at Yancheng again..." His clattering fingers were big The range goes up, "Jiangsu, Zhejiang and Shanghai are second, and Jiangsu Province is first. There is a difference of ten Wuxi between us and Yancheng."

Jichen: "Catch up with the penultimate one?"

Lian Xi: "Yes."

Jichen: "Then it becomes the second to last?"

Lian Xi: "...Yes." At least not the last one!

Ji Chen smiled: "Short-sighted, shallow ambition! As a hellish ghost messenger, Bai Wuchang, a majestic Sucheng, you only want to not be the second to last, just for the dignity of not being the last? Are you Is it because of this leaderboard that you are a ghost?"

Lian Xi opened his mouth in a daze, and looked at Master Heiwuchang with a cold face but a dignified look on his face.

Don't you want to catch ghosts because you lost your talent?

And... I am a ghost messenger because of you.

Ji Chen's tone was solemn: "Should rob from the rich and give to the poor."

Lian Xi: "..."

Jichen: "Don't bully the weak."

Lian Xi: "..."

We are weak right now!

Ji Chen: "Let's go out and catch ghosts."

Lian Xi was stunned: "The sun hasn't set yet."

"But there are still ghosts."

"Then my live broadcast, I still want to make money..."

Jichen paused: "Did you see the small print notes under this leaderboard?"

Lian Xi's heart suddenly moved, and an unbelievable thought came to his mind.He held his breath, looked down at Wuchangzheng expectantly and nervously, his eyes slowly moved down, and looked at the bottom of Guichai's performance ranking list for the month, and saw...

*Remarks: In the No.1 region of the month, black and white impermanence can get ten bowls of Mengpo soup, ten ghost hunting orders, one soul-calling banner, one hundred taels of gold, which can be exchanged for the same amount of Yangjian currency.

Ranked No.2 in the month, black and white impermanence can get Mengpo soup...gold 80 taels...

Ranked No.3 in the month...Gold 60 taels...

……

Ranked 24th in the month, black and white impermanence can get a drop of Wangchuan water and two coins of gold.

Ranked 25th in the month, black and white impermanence can get a drop of Wangchuan water and a coin of gold.

Lian Xi felt that his blood, which had been silent for many years, suddenly boiled and rushed straight to the top of his head.

It is known that one tael is equal to 50 grams; one qian is equal to 5 grams.

And a gram of gold...

Lian Xi turned on her phone and searched for today's gold price.

555 soft sister coins!

Lian Xi: "!!!"

Under the setting sun, the handsome fair-skinned young man suddenly raised his head, and looked at Ji Chen calmly: "I'm ready."

Jichen was slightly startled: "Huh?"

In the next second, Lian Xi had already walked to the entrance and began to change his shoes. He raised his head to look at Hei Wuchang who was still standing in the restaurant, and asked in surprise, "Didn't you say you were going out to catch ghosts?"

Ji Chen was stunned for a long while, and his eyes stopped for a long time on the serious face of the young man.

With a raised eyebrow, Jin Chen smiled: "Oh."

Su Jiao was still sitting on the sofa gnawing sugarcane, not knowing what happened.This road has twists and turns, ups and downs, and the plot develops so fast that he can't understand it!

Su Jiao couldn't help pulling Lianxi back: "Hey Lianxi, what are you doing? You're going to catch ghosts before it's dark? You don't want to broadcast live at night?"

Lian Xi: "I've already sent a WeChat message to Wai Wai, and today I will ask for leave."

Su Jiao: "?"

Fuck, when did you send the WeChat message? !

Su Jiao: "No, something is wrong with you..."

Upon hearing this, Lian Xi asked righteously: "Being evil? If you are the one who ranks first in performance, aren't you ashamed? Don't you feel ashamed to face others?" Lian Xi was heartbroken, "The people in Sucheng are diligent and diligent. , work hard, and finally brought the GDP of Sioux City to the top ten in the country, and the first in Suzhou Province. The people in the world are working so hard, but what are the ghosts in the underworld doing? Down, number, number one, number one! The corpse is a vegetarian meal! Don’t think about making progress ! Self-willed to degenerate! Shameful and hateful!"

Su Jiao: "Damn!"

Lian Xi: "I'm going to catch ghosts, so don't keep the door open."

As soon as the voice fell, there was only a bang, and the door closed.

In the empty room, only Su Jiaogan was left staring at the door panel for a moment, still not understanding what happened, it was extremely desolate.

Standing in front of the elevator, Lian Xi carefully looked at the Baiwuchang certificate in his hand, earnestly, studying every word, including the 24 regional ghosts and their points in the row above him.

These are class enemies who block my money and prevent me from buying a house.

Write it down in a notebook.

It doesn't matter if you have a hundred taels of gold or a monthly income of one million. The main thing is to be self-improvement, work hard, and want to do your part for the underworld and contribute to the construction of a harmonious society in Suzhou City.

but……

Lian Xi looked at Hei Wuchang beside him: "Jianchen, didn't you receive the reward for the Guicha performance leaderboard last month?"

The penultimate one also has a coin of gold, worth 2500 soft sister coins.

But Lian Xi has never seen Master Heiwuchang have money in his hand.

You're in a good mood today, how dare you call me by my name?Master Heiwuchang said indifferently: "The last reward is shameful."

The implication: Ben Wuchang disdains to get it, and does not admit the fact that it is the last one.As long as I don't receive it, I'm not the last one.

Lian Xi: "..."

defeat!Home!son!

You pay your rent first, okay?

The author has something to say:

CC: Sioux City is my home, and it depends on everyone to catch ghosts.To build a ghost-free city, ghosts are responsible.Don't rob me, this is my responsibility and my obligation.Love ghosts and hate hell, start with me, thank you.

just now.

President Xie: Catch ghosts and don’t disturb them, shame on you.

after.

President Xie: ...Are you in love?

CC: Are you satisfied with winning the first place in Jiangsu, Zhejiang and Shanghai?Have you won the first place in East China?Did you get the first place in the country?Talking about love, falling in love affects my speed of catching ghosts!