Can't Save the World by Pretending to be Dead

In the early hours of the morning, the moon was hazy and the cool breeze was blowing.

It's the first day of October.

The social animals in the world happily ushered in the eight-day National Day holiday, and the social animals in the underworld finally waited until the official ranking of the month's performance in September.

And this is destined to be a different day of closing the list.

Of the 25 cities in Jiangsu, Zhejiang and Shanghai, except for Sioux City and Wuxi, 23 pairs of ghosts from the other 46 cities stared fixedly at the performance rankings in their hands.

In the end, Wenzhou ranked first.

However, this is just the beginning.Because after twelve o'clock, the performance of Sucheng Guichai is still skyrocketing!

The certificate of impermanence in Ji Chen's hand, and names kept flying out, pouring into Lian Xi's certificate of impermanence.As if the former Bai Wuchang and the new Bai Wuchang were handing over, the names on the old Bai Wuchang certificates appeared on Lian Xi's Bai Wuchang certificates one by one.

The names keep coming up, and the performance points keep rising.

September passed, and last month's performance leaderboard score became a thing of the past, turning into gray writing, slowly dimming.

Beginning in October, a new day, a new list of performance.All the ghosts have not had time to catch the ghosts and save their achievements. The points after their names are all 0, only Sioux City.That's right, it's still that old friend Su Cheng, the points of Su Cheng Guichai are still increasing wildly at an incredible speed!

Guichai's performance ranking list for the month (Jiangsu, Zhejiang and Shanghai regions)——

No.1, Guichai in Sioux City, Suzhou Province, with a performance of 20111 points.

No.2, Wenzhou Guichai, Zhejiang Province, with 0 performance points.

No.3, Yancheng Guichai, Jiangsu Province, with 0 performance points.

No. 4...

Ghost messengers: "..."

Can you two cheating beasts still have some face!

Even Xi didn't expect that after they caught the sloppy old man, they would be able to find the impermanence certificate of the previous Su Cheng Bai Wuchang from the other party.The certificate of impermanence does not recognize the old man as the master, but it records everyone who the old man killed.The old man used the souls of these people as feed to feed those disgusting and terrifying black bugs.

The souls of these people were riddled with holes from the black worms. Some of their three souls and six souls were all gnawed out, and some were even eaten until only one soul remained.

When the names of these people flew from the old man's certificate of impermanence to Lian Xi's certificate of impermanence, in the dark night, one by one dazed souls also floated out of the book.

They were unconscious, shaking their souls, lined up, and walked towards the underworld one by one.

If anyone can see this scene, it will definitely be shocked.

In the dark night, in a remote and somewhat desolate corner of the city, hundreds of people lowered their heads and walked step by step into a golden light cluster.That is the gate connecting the underworld to the world.Their bodies were swallowed by the golden light cluster.Those who walk in the front have the most wounds, and those who walk behind have fewer wounds.

When it came to the last yellow-haired gangster, he walked into the golden light ball with almost no wounds on his body.

All the ghosts were led into the underworld, Lian Xi sighed softly.He looked down at the certificate of white impermanence in his hand, then looked at Ji Chen, and asked, "Is there a name on that certificate of impermanence?"

Jichen glanced at the certificate of impermanence: "Yes." Then, he handed the tattered and useless certificate of impermanence to Lian Xi.

Lian Xi received the certificate of impermanence.I saw that on this dirty and old impermanence certificate, there were still many writings that seemed to have been erased, but they did not fly into my impermanence certificate.Some of them died in 2004 and some in 2005.The last name that didn't fly out, died in 2015.

These people were really completely eaten up by the black worms, and could no longer be reincarnated.

Lian Xi quickly scanned the names.There are a total of 32 names, not all of them were killed by the old man, some died of car accidents, and some died of illness.It's just that the old man had noticed them a long time ago. At the moment of their death, before they had time to go to the underworld to reincarnate, their souls were intercepted by the old man and planted with black worms. From then on, they could no longer escape.

Lian Xi silently put away the proof of impermanence.

"You guys, you guys are cheating!"

Su Cheng's black and white impermanence turned around and looked at Wuxi's little devil who was full of righteous indignation.

I saw the little boy who was less than 160 meters tall looking up at them, repeating like a fool: "If you don't bring something like this, how can there be such a thing. You are obviously the second to last, how can you, how can you suddenly be right? It's second." It was clearly agreed that everyone would lift the car together, so how could you secretly review it!

Wuxi Xiaoguicha was full of grievances.

It was as if he was sitting at the same table with his student god.Every time after the exam, Wuxi Xiaoguicha started to lose his hair like crazy.Seeing his grief, Xueshen's deskmate talked to comfort him: "Don't worry, I didn't review this time, and I did very poorly in the exam. We were scolded together, and I will accompany you." It seems that he does miss out and play with his mobile phone every day in class, he is really a good brother who has both sides.

I didn't expect the test paper to come.

Little ghost difference: 59 points.

Xueshen's deskmate: "Ah, why did you deduct a point?"

Little ghost: "?"

Listen, is this a human speech?I believe your evil!

I never expected that I would treat you as a good brother who stabbed me in the ribs, but you actually stabbed me in the ribs.

Wuxi Xiaoguicha suddenly smelled a strong sour smell, lingering in his nostrils.He ate a lemon hard, snorted softly: "You guys are definitely cheating, I want to report you."

Before he finished speaking, the little ghost angrily opened his impermanence certificate.

Lian Xi frowned and was about to stop.

However, Jichen caught the key words, and he asked seemingly casually: "Can you report it?"

Wuxi Xiaoguicha: "Of course! Your cheating behavior is simply shameful. I must report it."

Jichen: "How to report?"

Wuxi Xiaoguicha asked subconsciously: "You don't know how to contact the underworld?"

Ji Chen: "When I took office, Hei Wuchang, the predecessor of Sucheng, was seriously injured and went to the underworld without telling me anything."

The little ghost almost nodded: "So that's the case, no wonder you don't understand anything. It's very simple, that is, you open the certificate of impermanence, and put your hand on your own name on the performance list. If you speak more than six words, you can contact the underworld. But this thing is one-sided. It means that you leave a message to the underworld. As for when they will reply to you, you don’t know. The underworld doesn’t take us seriously Yes, maybe I will come back to you in half a year."

Ji Chen: "Oh, thank you."

The little ghost: "You're welcome..." The voice stopped abruptly, and the little ghost said with grief and indignation: "Thank you, who wants you!" He clearly wanted to report these two cheaters, so why was he fooled into teaching them science? up.

Lian Xi thought to himself: Don't worry, you made money. This is the first time I see you and I always thank you.

After listening to the science popularization from the little ghost messenger, Jichen lowered his head and opened his impermanence certificate.

Lian Xi asked in surprise, "What are you doing?"

The minister didn't lift his head: "Report."

Lian Xi: "?"

Wuxi little devil: "?"

There are ghosts in this world who report themselves?

In the evening wind, Heiwuchang spoke in a low voice, "Report Wenzhou ghost messengers for cheating, and your points have increased by [-] in the last second. You must be cheating. I suggest that you deprive the ghost messengers of their identity and enter the eighteenth hell. You will never be reborn forever. complete."

Lian Xi and the little ghost: "..."

Jichen: "By the way, because of his cheating, which seriously affected the fairness of the September Guichai performance rankings, it is recommended to compensate the second-ranked Guichai. It's over."

Lian Xi and the little ghost: "..."

The little ghost turned to look at Lian Xi: Is your colleague still human?

Lian Xi shook his head: He is really not human.

The two looked at each other sympathetically, and their friendship was sublimated at this moment.

……

Although Wuxi Xiaoguicha ate a big basket of lemons and was so angry that he died, but in the end he just talked about it and did not really report Lianxi and Xichen.He snorted and said, "Although I didn't report you, I'm sure there must be other ghosts who have reported you, and there are more than one. You just wait." It was agreed that the crane will end together, how can you fly alone? .

Lian Xi was not afraid of the swaying shadow, and said confidently: "Our points are justified." After a pause, he frowned slightly, "It is true that there is something wrong with Wenzhou ghosts. They finally increased by [-] points."

The Wuxi little devil screamed in his heart: You have increased by [-]!Eighty thousand!

是的，从2020年9月30日，到次日10月1日的现在。连奚和捩臣一共涨了8万多积分。

Because the 4 points have risen beyond zero, more than 4 points are counted as the performance of the previous month, and more than [-] points are counted as the performance of October.

So now the ghost difference performance rankings in the Jiangsu, Zhejiang and Shanghai regions are like this——

No.1, Guichai in Sioux City, Suzhou Province, with a performance of 42143 points.

No.2, Wenzhou Guichai, Zhejiang Province, with a performance of 350 points.

No.3, Ningbo ghosts in Zhejiang Province...

Fault number one!

Lian Xi stroked his chin and sighed lightly: "It's a pity that there will be no such good things in the future."

Once is not enough?It turns out that you Sioux City's black and white faces are equally big, so shameless!The little ghost suddenly felt very tired.

Lian Xi: "By the way, how do you get the reward for the performance list?"

The little ghost said listlessly: "Use your finger to wipe off the gray writing on the performance points of last month, and you will know how to receive the reward when the sun rises."

Even Xi Wenyan did as he said, and this time, Ji Chen did not refuse to accept the reward again.

Ranked second, although this ranking is unsatisfactory, it can barely satisfy President Xi.But thinking about how he could have won the first place, the more he thought about it, the more angry he became.A gloomy look flashed across Hei Wuchang's handsome face. He snorted softly, opened the ghost certificate again, and said righteously: "Please punish the Wenzhou ghost immediately. It is suggested that the punishment of the 1000th hell can be carried out for two rounds. Send it to the court of Guanghan in the northern desert, and be roasted by the cold fire for [-] years. It's over."

Lian Xi and the little ghost: "..."

You are really a person!

Hei Wuchang's shameless and naivety made Lian Xi and Xiao Guicha ignore a strange term that Jichen mentioned.And this word, even Jichen himself didn't pay attention.At this moment, there is only one thing on his mind: my number one was robbed.

The sky is big and the earth is big, and the performance is the biggest.

If you don't let me take the first place, you have a problem with your thinking.

After working all night, he finally solved the matter of the old man Hei Chong, and at the same time got [-] points by accident.

Even Xi and Jichen were very satisfied with this result.

It's not early, it's already 12:30 in the morning.The two of Lian Xi and Wuxi Xiaoguichai said their goodbyes, and got a supercilious look from the Xiaoguichai, and the two sides officially parted.Before leaving, the little ghost messenger took out his mobile phone, with an expression of giving you alms: "I see that you all know nothing except catching ghosts. Add a WeChat account, and if you have something to say in the future, you can directly chat on WeChat."

Sure enough, talking about others together can build friendship.Lian Xi took out his mobile phone, scanned the QR code and added Xiao Guicha as a friend.

Lian Xi: "He just came out of hell and took office as Hei Wuchang, and he hasn't bought a mobile phone yet. When he buys it, I'll ask him to register on WeChat and add you too. By the way, 1. What's your name? I'll change the note."

The little ghost: "Tang Zi. How about you?"

"Lianxi. His name is Jichen."

"Jianchen? What a weird name."

Ah.Jichen glanced at him indifferently, and didn't bother to answer him.

Saying goodbye to the little ghost, the two got into the car, and Lian Xi remembered something: "When we get home, we can search the old man for Mengpo soup, and then use Mengpo soup to marry Su Jiao. That case. But I was thinking about one thing..." He looked at his colleague: "Meng Po soup can let the police find this old man, but this old man is a Xuanxiu with strong spells after all. Although all his bugs are now We eliminated it, but will he continue to breed new bugs in the future?"

In the back seat of the car, when the old man heard this, his body froze and his eyes darkened.

Ji Chen understood what he meant: "You want to ruin his practice?"

Lian Xi thought for a moment: "I can try it with a bell, and you can also try it with your seal. When your seal is stamped on that black bug, the bug will turn into a puddle of black water. Maybe it will also work for this old man. "

Gently nodding his head, Ji Chen's fingers moved slightly, and a translucent white seal instantly appeared on his fingertips.

The seal appeared, and there was a moment of silence in the carriage.The old man clenched his fingers, trembling, wanting to resist.He didn't forget how this seal was affixed casually, and he wiped out the giant corpse insect that he had worked so hard to raise with his soul and body for more than 40 years.A strong sense of crisis welled up in his heart. If he was stamped by this thing, perhaps his practice might really be wiped out, and he would never be able to refine insects again.

However, the old man is currently weak and has no chance to resist.

The minister pushed with his palm, and the white jade seal shone with golden light, poking at the old man's gate of life.Seeing that the seal was about to be covered on his face, the old man finally showed panic, and he said loudly, "No, I admit defeat. There are still many ghost hunting orders and Mengpo soup where I live. As long as you let me go, I will take it away." These are all for you. I promise that I will never come to Su City again, never again. No, I will leave Su Province, far away from you!" The white jade seal was getting closer and closer, and the old man said at the end, almost became a scream.

Ji Chen didn't pay any attention to his words.Can ghost hunting orders and Mengpo soup be exchanged for performance?cannot.Oh, that's all right.

"Wait." Lian Xi made a quick move, grabbing the white jade seal that was flying towards the old man.

The white jade seal was grabbed by someone unexpectedly, seemed a little surprised and dissatisfied, and struggled a few times.Lian Xi glanced at the seal in surprise: It's still a living thing?But thinking about his bronze bell, he would sometimes lose his temper, Lian Xi felt relieved, and held the seal even tighter to keep it from moving.

White jade seal: "..." Anyone can order me around, I don't want to lose face!

Lian Xi looked at the old man and narrowed his eyes: "You said, you still have a lot of ghost hunting orders and Mengpo soup?"

The old man was sweating profusely: "Yes!"

Lian Xi: "Okay, then take us to where you live."

The old man rolled his eyes: "What guarantee do you have, if I give you something, you will bypass me?"

Lian Xi smiled: "Do you think you have room for negotiation now?"

The old man gritted his teeth: "If you don't give me a guarantee, I won't take you there even if I die."

Lian Xi: "Then I promise you."

The old man asked: "What do you use as a guarantee?"

Lian Xi smiled and said, "Believe it or not, I don't care anyway."

The old man was silent for a moment, his small eyes like poisonous snakes swept over the faces of Lian Xi and Ji Chen, as if he wanted to keep them in mind.He gritted his teeth, and said word by word: "I hope you can keep your promise. Otherwise, I will become a ghost, and I will never die with you!"

……

The place where the old man lives is a one-story house in the ancient city of Sucheng.There was a lot of rubbish inside, it was dirty and dark, and there was an indescribably disgusting smell before entering the door.

The room was too dirty and smelly, and Ji Chen refused to enter, just standing outside the door.

The old man was tied up and got out of the car. Lian Xi pressed him into the house, and under his guidance, he found more than 50 ghost hunting orders and more than 20 bowls of Mengpo soup.

Mengpo soup is packed in a small white porcelain bottle, and the three characters "Mengpo soup" are engraved on the body of the bottle in seal script.

The old man: "These are all the things. When I first came to Su City and ate that Bai Wuchang, I found so much from him. Now it's your turn to keep your promise and let me go."

Lian Xi: "Did I tell you to let you go?"

The old man's eyes were rounded, and his eyes were about to split: "Shameless boy, how dare you break the contract. This old man swears here that I will never die with you! When the old man dies, it will be the day of revenge. Even if the old man dies, I will definitely I want you to pay with blood!"

Lian Xi sneered quietly, he looked at the old man with cold eyes, and pushed him out of the door.

"Stamp him."

Jichen looked up at him: "What he said just now seems unusual, like a curse, and it should come true."

Lian Xi: "Really."

Jichen looked at him calmly: "Xuanxiu is different from ordinary people. You promised him, but you broke the promise. He swore with his soul, and it will be fulfilled."

Lian Xi looked calm: "Then let it come true."

After a while, Ji Chen asked: "Are you for those mortals whom he killed to sacrifice insects?"

"maybe."

"No need, life and death are impermanent, this is fate, it's just another reincarnation."

Lian Xi: "What about the 32 people who can no longer be reborn?"

The minister looked at him fixedly, and asked: "If you destroy his practice, can these mortals be reincarnated again?"

Lian Xi's lips moved.

At this moment, under the bright moonlight, Heiwuchang's cold and indifferent eyes stared at him without emotion, like a god from the nine heavens staring at the human world.

Never before has Lian Xi realized so profoundly that ghost messengers can be people, ghosts, or spirits.

But Su Cheng's black impermanence, he is not human.

After a long time, Lian Xi smiled and said: "This is probably a human being. Even if you know that it has no effect, even if you know that those people he killed over the years, those people whose souls were scattered because of him, they will never be able to live forever. But, I have to do this Do."

The old man roared sharply: "I swear, I will never kill again. The method of raising corpse insects is not limited to human souls. I am [-] years old this year, and I can survive because of this practice. You destroy me Practicing is like asking me to die, I will not live for a lifetime!"

"Really?" Under the same round of bright moonlight, the handsome and elegant young man smiled slightly, showing a small canine tooth: "Then you will pay for them."

"Straight!"

Lian Xi looked at Jichen: "Stamp it. If you don't want him to curse you, I can ring the bell, and maybe I can abolish his practice. But he probably won't let you go."

Jichen took a deep look at him, and with a movement of his finger, a white jade glow flashed, and the seal was stamped on the old man's gate of life.

"There is a way in the universe, but there is no door to hell!"

"Ahhhh!!!"

The tearing cry echoed in the small courtyard, but strangely, it did not reach the next door.Because it's not the old man screaming, it's his soul screaming.Mortals should not listen to the voice of the three souls.Where the seal was placed, golden light shone, six gold characters in seal script were suspended in the air, and bursts of black air rose into the air.

This black air kept leaving the old man's body, and every time it left, the old man became older.

By the end, he had gray hair all over his head.But after all, he used to be a profound Taoist Xuanxiu. After the black energy dissipated, except for his white hair, the old man only looked like an old man in his 70s or [-]s, which was completely different from his actual age.

His body was slumped, and the old man collapsed to the ground. This time, he couldn't even move his fingers.

At this time, there is no need to be wary of this old man anymore.Lian Xi untied the rope that bound him, and just let him lie on the ground.

Lian Xi: "The police should come to find you soon, don't worry, you won't be lying here for long."

The practice was exhausted, the old man was speechless, and could only stare at Lian Xi with resentful eyes.

Lian Xi stood up: "Let's go."

The narrow courtyard door creaked shut, the cracks of the door were closed, and the old man who fell on the ground could no longer be seen.

The matter has come to this point, it can be regarded as a complete end, and the final solution can be obtained only when Lian Xi takes Mengpo soup to pour on the police handling the case tomorrow.And he has already thought about the candidate for pouring Mengpo soup.

After getting into the car, Lian Xi put on his seat belt and asked, "By the way, I asked you to wash your seal that was touched by bugs before. You didn't think it was dirty, but you just refused to wash it. The old man's house just now It's quite dirty, but you don't have a cleanliness, why don't you go in." He also looked very disgusted.

Ji Chen imitated Lian Xi's movements and put on his seat belt. "Is the corpse dirty?"

Lian Xi asked strangely, "Isn't it dirty?"

Jichen: "You hate that old man?"

"You don't hate it?"

Without answering this question, Heiwuchang asked another question: "You feel dirty after touching corpse insects. Then why didn't you ask to clean the seal after touching the old man. Touching insects is for uncleanness; touching people , don’t count?”

Lian Xi froze suddenly, he slowly raised his head and looked at his colleague.

In the silent carriage, Heiwuchang said indifferently, "What's the difference between a human and an insect?"

In the quiet compartment, the hum of the car engine echoed.

After a long time, Lian Xi laughed and said, "Maybe you are right."

Jichen glanced at him, looked away, and lowered his head to continue looking at his impermanence certificate.

While driving, Lian Xi said, "By the way, I'll buy you a mobile phone when the reward comes down."

Ji Chen pricked up his ears: mobile phone?

Lian Xi: "It's more convenient to have a mobile phone. With a mobile phone, I think you will be able to integrate into modern society soon." By the way, you can also pay the rent by yourself.

"Oh."

The car drove slowly, on the empty early morning street, carrying Black and White Wuchang to the distance.

At the same time, Jinhua, Zhejiang Province, Hengdian Film and Television City.

Sometimes people always think that it is very easy to be a celebrity, and you can easily earn tens of millions.But in the hearts of fans, these are also exchanged by their own idols with sweat.

The idol of the little vixen is going to shoot a big scene tonight.Fans surrounded the fence set up by the crew, and no one was willing to leave.

"Sisters, if Qiqi doesn't go, I won't go, I will beat the drum for Qiqi!"

"Yes, sisters, Qiqi is not off work, how can we leave."

The little fox responded inside: "That's right, that's right!"

That is to say, after waiting for so long, idols still haven't got off work, and the fans are sleepy one by one, and some of them went back to the hotel by themselves.Of course the little vixen is not sleepy, she used to watch TV series for three days and three nights without blinking an eye.But boredom is really boring. When bored, the vixen opened his black impermanence certificate, and then...

"???"

Excuse me?

The vixen made his own vixen call in his heart.

Finding a place where no one was around, she quietly called her colleagues: "Why are you fat four, Tang Zi, what's going on in Sucheng. I remember yesterday morning I saw that they were still the second to last, with only more than 8000 achievements, and this It's not a whole month's sales, it's only the first day of October, at 01:30 in the morning. How did they get more than 4 sales in one and a half hours?"

The little ghost officer had just returned home, and he said speechlessly, "Can you be more dedicated! It's been more than an hour before you realized something was wrong. They took the second place in September, you know!"

The vixen's back exploded: "Excuse me?"

Little ghost: "This matter is a long story."

Then, the little ghost messenger told his colleagues what happened tonight.

The vixen stared wide-eyed in horror: "How can such a good thing happen? I have lived for more than 100 years and been a black man for 100 years. Why didn't this happen to me?"

The little devil said sadly: "Don't pay attention to others, just look at us. We are the last one! Don't you feel ashamed, don't you feel ashamed? When are you going back to Wuxi?"

"Even if I go back, we will change from the bottom one to the tenth bottom. What's the difference between the bottom ten rewards? The bottom ten rewards are ten drops of Wangchuan water and one tael of gold; the bottom ten rewards are A drop of Wangchuan water is worth a penny of gold. Didn’t I teach you about science, Wangchuan water is just a waste snack, useless. If you are short of money, tell me, don’t I keep transferring money to you, count it as me absenteeism fees.”

"No, is this a question of money?!"

"I transferred 50 to you just now, please take it. Tang Zi, don't treat yourself badly. My sister has lived for more than 100 years, and she has nothing much but money. Tell my sister if you have anything to do."

"……okay."

"Ah, my Qiqi has come out, let's talk about this first, hang up."

After hanging up the phone, Wuxi Xiaoguicha looked at his mobile phone in a trance. After a while, he muttered: "Your Qiqi is here. I think you want to hang up. Hu Xiaoli, isn't this It's about money, you have to come back next month, no matter how much money you give!"

Thinking so in his heart, the little ghost sent a WeChat message to his colleagues.However, halfway through the editing of the WeChat message, he read it for a long time before silently deleting it.

Woohoo, she gave too much...

But there is one thing that the little ghost guessed wrong. This time, his rich woman colleague didn't tell a lie because he wanted to hang up the phone, but really saw the idol.

Hu Xiaoli ran over excitedly, waving the LED light sign: "Qi Qi Qi Qi, look at mom!"

"Ah, Lin Siqi, you have to eat well!"

"Qiqi, you need to go to bed early!"

"Lin Siqi ah ah ah!"

On set, high-wattage lights illuminate the darkness, turning the night into daylight.The handsome, top-notch student smiled and waved to the fans, then turned around and walked towards the nanny van.

"Ah, I'm dead."

"Qiqi was looking at me just now."

Hu Xiaoli curled his lips: He is obviously looking at me, okay.

Standing in the middle of the fans, Hu Xiaoli didn't notice that after the top-ranking student walked into the nanny's car, the door closed, and a trace of almost imperceptible black air slipped in through the crack of the door.

A vixen who has lived for more than 100 years and spends most of his time on eating, sleeping and earning money, but not on cultivation, rubs his chin and thinks: "What scene will Qiqi be filming tomorrow?"