hell make me fall in love

Liu Xu was stunned.

He didn't expect Shen An to come by himself.

After being stunned for a moment, he turned around, leaned out, without saying a word, gently grabbed Shen Anxing's sleeve, and pulled him closer to him.

Seeing the tears in the corners of his eyes, Shen Anxing knew it already.

He didn't say a word, and followed Liu Xu's force obediently, and moved two steps towards him.

He was standing beside Liu Xu's bed, and after taking a step or two, he was in front of Liu Xu.

After pulling the man over, Liu Xu leaned on him, put his head on him, and hugged him.

From the beginning to the end, he didn't say a word, didn't say a word, only when he leaned on Shen Anxing, he took a light breath, as if he was holding back his grievance.

Shen Anxing didn't speak either, he hugged Liu Xu and patted him lightly, as if to comfort him.

Liu Xu didn't cry, he just hugged Shen Anxing.

Shen Anxing changed his clothes and put on a coat.He was wearing thick clothes, and when he was hugging him, Liu Xu could only vaguely feel a trace of coldness, which was the residual coldness that could not be completely isolated from the night watchman of Bingshan Hell.

After the two hugged each other for a while, Liu Xu finally got stuck in his arms and said softly, "I'm sorry."

Shen Anxing knew what he was talking about, he pursed his lips and gave a helpless smile, and said, "There's nothing to be sorry for, I'm used to it...it's my fault too, for not protecting you well."

Liu Xu felt Shen Anxing put his hands on his hair, and began to stroke it gently.

Shen Anxing was well armed, and also wore long black gloves on his hands, so much of the coldness was cut off like this, and Liu Xu only felt a little bit cold when he touched him like this.

He heard Shen Anxing say again: "I have wronged you."

Liu Xu didn't answer, he tried his best to keep his mouth shut, feeling sad again.

For the first time, he couldn't help thinking, why is Shen Anxing like this?

Obviously he was injured, he dragged a burden covered in blood to the end, he risked his life and chose the most risky path.It was obviously him who should be wronged the most, but why did he say "I wronged you"?Why did he say "it's all my fault"?

What did he do wrong?

Why is he saying this?Obviously he is the one who suffers the most?

Liu Xu felt sad and blamed himself.

It's all his fault for trying to exchange information with Shao Fang, which made this happen.

Maybe it was because of self-blame, or maybe it was because of the unstoppable grievances after seeing Shen Anxing, by accident, Liu Xu said, "It's not that you didn't protect me well."

"Ok?"

"That's punishment."

Liu Xu hugged him and said to him: "I heard it... I heard it after I fell down. Someone said, this is my punishment."

"Don't be angry when you say it, I was...actually a little happy at that time."

"I thought to myself, fortunately it's me, not you... In this way, you don't have to be hit again. If you think about it this way, can I count as helping you avoid a disaster?"

Shen Anxing's eyes twitched: "..."

"But when I saw you like that later, I felt that I was such an idiot." Liu Xu murmured, "It's not your fault, it's all my fault... After meeting you, I decided that I must never let you You're hurt again."

"But you're still getting hurt, more than once."

When Liu Xu said this, he took a deep breath, and after a moment of silence, he said to him in a very heavy voice, "I'm such a bastard."

"no……"

Shen Anxing didn't expect Liu Xu to think this way at all, he panicked all of a sudden, he was at a loss what to do, just when he was about to say something to comfort him quickly, Liu Xu called him again.

"Shen Anxing."

With just that sound, everything Shen Anxing wanted to say was blocked back in his throat.

Pushed by grievances and self-blame, Liu Xu kept this sentence buried deep in his heart by accident, and said it without intending to tell Shen Anxing.

"I'm not doing well at all," he said.

"..."

Shen Anxing was startled when he heard that.

After Liu Xu finished speaking, he didn't know how to continue, or he wanted to wait for Shen Anxing to say something, so he suddenly fell silent.

Shen Anxing put his hands on his shoulders and fell silent.

He knew that Liu Xu's life was not going well, but when the words came out of the other party's mouth, he didn't know what to do.

Hugging him or comforting him, which can be done easily, seems to be too light as a feather in the face of these heavy seven years.

Shen Anxing wanted to give Liu Xu a little more, a little more, enough to fill seven years of loneliness.

But he also understands that the belated sunshine cannot save the withered flowers.

So no matter what he says or does, it is impossible to make up for the seven years.

Shen Anxing lowered his eyes.

The two were relatively silent.But at this moment, with a click, someone opened the door of the ward.

They all looked towards the door again.

The person who came in was a nurse.

The nurse couldn't see Shen Anxing, so Liu Xu sat by the bed alone.After opening the door and coming in, she said, "Are you awake? How do you feel?"

When someone came in, Liu Xu couldn't stick to Shen An anymore.

He had no choice but to let go of his hand, and rubbed it back, but he refused to really let go, so he held Shen Anxing with the hand that didn't have the infusion, and replied: "It's okay."

He was really okay, there was nothing wrong with him, except when he first woke up, he felt like he had a lump of chili oil stuck in his throat.

I think it should be the fault of gastric lavage.

As soon as the nurse came in, Shen Anxing subconsciously turned to the side to make room for her—although there was no need to do so.

The nurse approached, looked at the drip, then suddenly frowned, reached out to pick up the drip speed device, slowed down the drip speed a lot, and muttered, "Why are you adjusting it so fast? Don't you feel pain?"

Liu Xu pouted.

The nurse didn't say it, but it didn't show it. When she said this, it hurt really painful.

Shen Anxing glanced at him, lowered his eyes, and said nothing.

The nurse glanced at the infusion bags, then lowered her head and told him a lot.

For example, remember to call the nurse after the infusion, or avoid cold, seafood, greasy, spicy, alcohol, tea and coffee, or drink more porridge, drink more soup, drink more hot water and don’t drink beverages, and tell him to stay in the hospital for a day for observation If there is nothing serious about the situation, she can be discharged from the hospital - after talking so much, she finally left.

The nurse closed the door and left.

After she left, Shen Anxing took half a step to the side, lowered his head, reached out to pick up the drip rate device on the infusion tube, took a look, and asked, "Why are you adjusting it so fast? I didn't even notice."

"...No." Liu Xu replied dryly, "I just think it's too slow."

Shen Anxing naturally didn't believe it, and he also saw it clearly.

Most likely Liu Xu was angry and vented his anger on this thing.

He was like this before, and he would not spread his emotions on others.

If Liu Xu is in a bad mood, he will either bite the pen or fold the corners of the book and notebook. Sometimes when he gets angry, he will write so hard in class that there will be a bang. When he was in high school, there were times when Shen Anxing That's what woke me up.

All in all, the targets of Liu Xu's anger are all the dead things around him.

He bullied them for not being able to speak.

Shen Anxing understood clearly like a mirror in his heart, but he didn't say it out loud.

He laughed, put the ticker back, did not expose Liu Xu, and only said: "Be nice to yourself."

Liu Xu pouted.

Shen Anxing reached out and rubbed his head.

Liu Xu accepted it obediently, without saying a word.

After rubbing Liu Xu's hair like this for a while, Shen Anxing suddenly remembered something, said softly "That's right", put his hand into the pocket of his coat, and took out Liu Xu's cell phone.

"This." Shen Anxing handed him the phone and said, "I don't think he brought it for you, so he brought it for you."

"Oh……"

Liu Xu took it over, just like Shen Anxing, and then slowly remembered the strange place, and said "Huh?" and asked, "By the way, how do you know I'm here?"

"I used your mobile phone to call your classmate again." Shen Anxing said, "He knew me well the first time, and knew that I was going to find you, so he told me the address."

Liu Xu: "..."

Liu Xu was speechless for a moment.

"Would you like to call your parents?" Shen Anxing asked, "There must be someone alive to look after you?"

"No need, it's not a serious illness, just get an infusion and stay in the hospital. Didn't she just say that she can leave tomorrow if she's fine?" Liu Xu said, "But I called my sister, and she said she Come at noon."

Shen Anxing responded, "Oh."

Then, the two fell silent again.

It seemed that there was a tacit understanding, and no one continued the topic just now.

But it's not that they don't want to continue, it's just that one of them doesn't want to continue to expose the scars, and one of them doesn't know what to do.

Liu Xu was aggrieved just now, but now that he was disturbed by the nurse, he calmed down somewhat.After calming down, he really wanted to slap himself, find a time machine and travel back to a few minutes ago, and withdraw the sentence "I'm not doing well", without leaving a single word for Shen Anxing to hear.

He is indeed having a bad time.

Although he has a high salary, strong business ability, lives alone in an expensive apartment complex, and is considered to be living a prosperous and successful life in the eyes of outsiders, he still has a bad life.

No one saw him insomnia in the middle of the night sitting in front of the large French window watching the night scene, no one thought about what it would be like for him to live alone in the house that Shen Anxing had imagined, no one knew that every night, he watched What are you thinking when the world around you is empty.

No one can understand his torment.

But even though he was suffering, it had nothing to do with others after all, so Liu Xu has been bearing it all by himself.

Having said that, it has nothing to do with Shen Anxing.

It's not Shen Anxing's fault that he's living a bad life.

What can Shen Anxing do?Hearing this from Liu Xu's mouth, besides worrying about his heart, what else can he do?

He can't do anything.

...what are you talking about.

The more Liu Xu thought about it, the more he blamed himself, and the more he blamed himself, the more angry he became, so he could only keep his head down and flick his phone, but he couldn't read a word.

He raised his head and glanced at Shen Anxing, only to see that the other party had been looking at him with lowered eyes.

Liu Xu pouted again, feeling that the atmosphere between him and Shen Anxing had become inexplicably strange.

It was suffocatingly weird.

After being silent for an unknown amount of time, Shen Anxing called him suddenly.

"Yanghua."

"Ok?"

Liu Xu responded and subconsciously raised her head.

As soon as he raised his head, his face was held in his arms.

Liu Xu was startled, but before he could react, he saw Shen Anxing lowered his head, leaned over, held his face, carefully and solemnly, and planted a kiss on his forehead.

Liu Xu was completely stunned.

This kiss was careful, solemn and slow. After the kiss, Shen Anxing lowered his head slightly and looked at him.

"I know you're having a bad time," he said. "To be honest, I don't know what to do. It just doesn't feel like anything is enough."

"I thought about it for a long time, and finally I just remembered that you did this when I was very scared and sad."

Following these words, Liu Xu slowly remembered the past.

He seemed to have done this before.

During those days when Shen Anxing was afraid of living with self-doubt and self-fear, it was Liu Xu who comforted him by kissing him like this.

"You let me survive, Yang Hua. So... I don't care about the past, from now on, you must live well."

Shen Anxing said, "For what you want."

In a daze, Liu Xu also seemed to hear what he said to Shen Anxing eight years ago——

"You have to live, Shen Anxing."

"Don't you still want to see the sea, don't you still want to go to the planetarium, don't you still want to fall in love with me?"

"You have to live for what you want. If you die, you will have nothing. There is no way to go to the planetarium or the sea, and I don't fall in love with the dead."