wag

"Fang Shaoyang?"

As soon as He Qiao's voice came out, the figure moved imperceptibly, but didn't turn around immediately.

Fang Shaoyang lowered his head, the flickering sparks between his fingers.

Looking back, it seemed that this was the first time he smoked in front of He Qiao.He Qiao couldn't see his face, but seeing his silence, he knew that he must be in an extremely bad mood at the moment.

"What happened?"

Walking to his side, He Qiao was surprised to find that there was a large bruise near his neck, and the one in the middle was already purple.Before he had time to take a closer look at what was going on, he heard Fang Shaoyang's hoarse and low voice: "Am I not worthy of being loved?"

He Qiao raised his head.

Fang Shaoyang looked at him: "Is there anyone in this world who will love me unconditionally?"

The fundus of the eyes were red and bloodshot, as if they had been smoked.

"Why would you ask such a question?" He Qiao frowned slightly, "Of course there will be."

"Who?"

He Qiao opened his lips, but suddenly lost his voice.

yeah, who?

The so-called unconditional love probably has no one other than parents.He Qiao himself has no shortage of love. His parents and grandparents loved him without reservation since he was a child, so he loves others as well.He once loved Shao Yang unconditionally, but now?

Seeing He Qiao's silence, Fang Shaoyang turned around and leaned deeply on the window, with most of his body fully leaning out.

"Dad came here in the afternoon. He asked me to let Aunt Duan go. He said she was sick and her mind was not clear. He asked me to let her go..."

He Qiao stood in Fang Shaoyang's shadow.

Seen from behind, his head hangs very low, his shoulders and back tremble slightly every time he speaks, and the soot also shakes from his fingers.He Qiao was suddenly a little scared, and reached out to pull him back from the window, but before he touched him, he heard a suppressed cry.

Fang Shaoyang hardly cried, but he could always cry easily in front of He Qiao.He Qiao is the only outlet for his emotions in this world, a special existence that he can trust completely without having to worry about calculations.He lowered his head, the cold wind from the outside pierced through the gap between his body and his jacket, and the low and restrained sobs seemed to be released after the lobes of his lungs were torn apart.

He Qiao's fingertips hurt.

Seeing Fang Shaoyang leaning out again, his heart was in his throat, and he almost shouted out.Unexpectedly, Fang Shaoyang straightened up with difficulty while holding the aluminum window frame, turned his head and looked at him with blurred vision: "If I don't let her go, what will you think of me?"

The smoke had already burned his hands, but he didn't realize it.He Qiao stepped forward, snatched it off and threw it away, grabbed his hand and said, "Let me see."

Fang Shaoyang pulled it out suddenly: "Say it! What do you think of me? Do you think I deserve to die again, I'm a scum, and I will kill everything and never leave a way for others to survive?"

Such a loud roar directly called the nurse. The nurse opened the door cautiously and asked what happened. He Qiao said, "It's nothing, he's not feeling well and lost his temper."

Fang Shaoyang turned around and kicked down the coat rack next to him, his chest heaving violently.

After the nurse closed the door, the room fell silent again.He Qiao lifted the shelf, and felt the burrs on the pine wood with his fingertips, which felt like the sharp edges of Fang Shaoyang's whole body.He took a deep breath: "Am I such an indiscriminate person in your heart?"

Fang Shaoyang did not answer.

He Qiao looked at him: "Sometimes you are not very nice, just like now, you like to lose your temper in front of the closest people, the more nice you are to you, the more you feel that you have held the other party, blindly asking for it, not knowing how to give .But I never think you are a scum, let alone think you deserve to die. You are a victim in this matter, and no one is qualified to ask you for forgiveness, because only you know how much you hurt."

Fang Shaoyang stood there stiffly and after listening to this, his whole body seemed to jump into a bucket of ice water, and the fire on his body went out in an instant.

After He Qiao finished speaking, he clenched his fists to encourage himself, walked over and dragged him to the edge of the bed to sit down, forcing him to unbutton a few shirt buttons, "Let me see your injury."

Fang Shaoyang suddenly became very obedient again.

He spread his legs apart, put his hands on his knees, raised his chin slightly, and stared at He Qiao.He Qiao stood between his legs, bent down, and looked at the bruise on his shoulder under the light of the bedside lamp.

"Your dad beat you?"

He nodded, much like a robot.

He Qiao touched Wu Qing lightly with his fingertips, always lowering his eyes: "Won't you hide when you hit you? The day before yesterday, he couldn't stand still. He can't be like this if he is your father. Next time—"

The rest of the words were gagged.

Fang Shaoyang tilted his head and kissed him for a short time, but the kiss was heavy and his mouth was full of smoke.After kissing, she left abruptly, staring at his reaction as if her eyes were on his face.

He Qiao's mind went blank for a second, and he didn't realize what had happened until their lips parted. His heart was beating violently uncontrollably.After reacting, he pushed Fang Shaoyang violently, and took a small step back.

Fang Shaoyang fell on the bed, humming in a low voice.

He Qiao was afraid that he would strike too hard, so after a moment's hesitation, he walked over and leaned over to see how he was doing, but was yanked violently by a hand——

The two bodies that hadn't been close for a long time approached again, and they couldn't wait to breathe together.In the dim light, Fang Shaoyang stared at him intently, so close that his breath hit his face.

"Break up with Rong Yue and stay with me."

He Qiao's posture of supporting the bed with both hands was uncomfortable, there was no point of support for his body, and Fang Shaoyang's arms locked him firmly.

"I'll wait a day if you don't break up with him, and a year if you don't break up with him in a year. I won't get married, don't want children, and spend my whole life with you." There was determination in her tone.

He Qiao looked away, but Fang Shaoyang's gaze made him feel invisible, "I'm serious."

On the opposite side, a child was playing with a flashlight, and a beam of light flashed across the glass, repeated several times, like a disordered heartbeat.No matter how He Qiao escaped, Fang Shaoyang would always find his eyes, and the pressure was overwhelming.

He Qiao turned his head to avoid: "What if I don't want to?"

Fang Shaoyang probably didn't think about this possibility at all, he paused, gritted his teeth and said, "No."

He Qiao pursed his lips.

"You have to be with me. I can't stand you being nice to others. The thought of others kissing and hugging you makes me want to kill someone. If I didn't see you in the car that time, I would—" He paused, He slapped himself, "I won't hurt you."

He Qiao couldn't tell what it was like in his heart.Sweet, sour, bitter, spicy, everything is available, and the tip of the tongue is slightly astringent.He struggled to sit up from the bed, and sat up for three or four minutes before saying, "I don't want to forget about the past."

Fang Shaoyang asked: "So you agreed?"

He Qiao shook his head: "What I mean is, you don't have to be with someone who doesn't feel new. Maybe you will regret it when you wake up tomorrow, and you will find that you have many better choices than me. "

Fang Shaoyang was in a hurry: "Is it okay to try?"

"Of course not." His heart tightened, "I can try with others, but I can't do it with you. To me, you are different from others. I have poured too much affection into you, so let's separate again To be honest, I don’t even know what I’m going to become.”

These are his heartfelt words, the most true and peaceful words after letting go of his airs and face.He hoped that Fang Shaoyang could understand that if he got it again and lost it again, what awaited him would be the pain of skin cramping, which he couldn't afford.

"If you just want a family, I am willing to be this person. I can help you when you need it, and I can support you unreservedly as a family member. But if you say you want to try with me again, sorry Shao Yang, I really can't do it."

He Qiao's voice became softer and softer, until in the end it was as if he was talking to himself.Fang Shaoyang's eyes were red, his head was lowered, and he couldn't say a word of rebuttal.

Speechless for a while.

He Qiao got up and went to open all the windows for ventilation, and put away the things knocked down in the quarrel just now, then went to the bathroom and washed his face with cold water.Back in the room, Fang Shaoyang was already lying down, with his head facing out the window and his back facing the door. There was a pack of cigarettes and a lighter on the bedside table.

He Qiao thought he was asleep, took a deep breath, and decided to leave.As soon as my hand touched the sleep light switch by the bed, I suddenly heard a hoarse voice: "You don't have confidence in me."

He Qiao paused.

The soft light sprinkled on Fang Shaoyang's short hair, making him look less fierce than usual.The two shoulder blades on his back protrude abruptly, and there is a smooth line in the center of his back muscles, which must be a fist.

"You don't trust my feelings for you, that's why you hesitate."

"Fang Shaoyang..."

"There's no need to explain, I understand." His back became even more hunched, "You think I'm not sure yet, maybe if I love you today, I'll love someone else tomorrow, and when I'm tired of playing, I'll kick you away."

He Qiao was at a loss for words.

He did think so.

Fang Shaoyang buried his head in the pillow, gritted his teeth, and said hoarsely: "Actually, you don't know, I have loved you alone in my life."

He Qiao froze in place.

"I made mistakes, I admit it. But I'm already correcting it, and I can do everything I can to make it up to you, why do you want to convict me for something that didn't happen?" He choked up, "Or are you saying that you refused me? You just fell in love with him and didn't want to separate from him."

"No." These three words almost blurted out.

Of course not.

"It has nothing to do with him. It's entirely between the two of us. I didn't think it through myself."

His voice was very soft, like a wisp of smoke floating in the air, but Fang Shaoyang still heard it.Fang Shaoyang moved his neck: "I can wait."

Whether it's a day, a year or ten years, he can wait.

He Qiao's nose was sore, he lowered his head and slowly wiped the water between his fingers with a tissue: "I'm going back first, you have a good rest."

"Can you stay with me for one night?" The back figure was extremely lonely and stubborn.

"have to work tomorrow."

Fang Shaoyang stopped talking, turned over and clutched his shoulders tightly, his body trembling and curled up together.He Qiao couldn't walk at all, his feet seemed to be on the floor.

Time passed silently, and the breathing in the ward was low.

"I--"

"Can you come and give me a hug?"

He Qiao just wanted to say that he was leaving, but before he could say it, he was blocked by a dull voice.Fang Shaoyang said: "Just hug for a while, my shoulder hurts."

He Qiao walked over involuntarily, and Fang Shaoyang seized the opportunity with a small movement of bending over. He pulled him into his arms and hugged him tightly from behind like a shrimp.

"Fang Shaoyang, be more disciplined and let me go." He Qiao reacted and began to struggle, but the skin on the back of his neck was repeatedly rubbed by the beard on his chin, and his waist was also supported by him, and his hands and feet could not exert any strength. superior.

Fang Shaoyang hugged his injured shoulder tightly, no matter how stubborn he was, he never let go, "I'll just hold it for a while, can you let me hold it for a while?" After finishing speaking, he also covered He Qiao's mouth, and pressed the tiger's mouth in, Sandwiched between his upper and lower teeth, "Bite me if you are angry, I can bear no matter how painful it is."

He Qiao really bit down hard, and he really carried it without saying a word, hugging his body tighter and tighter.After a long time, He Qiao's back was covered with sweat, and he lay in his arms like a collapse, like every time before, unable to think of an effective way to deal with him.

Seeing that he was not moving, Fang Shaoyang pinched his earlobe from behind, his Adam's apple rolled slowly, and his voice had a sense of breaking the boat: "I can do as much as he is good to you, and I will do whatever he gives you." Can I give it to you, give me another chance, I want to prove to you that I am no longer who I used to be."

He Qiao turned his head and asked in a hoarse voice: "How have you changed? If you really changed, you will hold me here and not let me go?"

"But I just can't let you go!" Fang Shaoyang buried his head in despair, and said with his lips against the back of his neck, "You can be angry however you want, but I just can't let you go, sometimes I even Want to lock you up..."

"How old are you, can you make some sense?"

"I won't reason with you." In the next second, He Qiao was dragged into the quilt, "I'll tell you about strength."

Through the trousers, he was bitten hard on the lower back, and the tingling feeling spread from the tailbone to the whole body, and a strong sense of being conquered was accompanied by a sense of shame.He Qiao was pressed on the bed by Fang Shaoyang, the back of his hand was also pressed tightly open, and his fingers were interlaced.

Limbs entangled violently during the struggle.

"I just want to hug you." Fang Shaoyang hoarsely said, "But if you move around like this again, I really can't help it."

He Qiao stopped immediately.

Dizzy with heat, the quilt was thrown on the floor.A black shadow on the wall pressed down on the person below him, as heavy as a mountain, panting rapidly with his lips against the wet hair roots.He Qiao couldn't see Fang Shaoyang's movements behind him, so he could only feel it with his body and skin, and his whole body burned like a fire.

Tonight he was still wearing the suit he wore to work, with his shirt tucked into his trousers.Fang Shaoyang pulled out the hem of his shirt roughly, and groped in along the cold material without any hindrance.He subconsciously tightened his body, and when he spoke, his voice was so dry that he was unfamiliar: "Fang Shaoyang, don't go too far..."

"Is that too much?"

Too many things have happened before.

Fang Shaoyang cut his hands back and sniffed the aroma of his neck and hair. After smelling enough, he put his lips on the shoulder blades of his back, biting and drawing circles along the raised bone shape, and soon A large piece of the shirt was gnawed wet.Biting down to the waist Fang Shao Yang felt that it was not satisfying, so he took off the shirt from his shoulders to his waist, and bit down along the waist again.

He Qiao felt both numb and painful, and kept trying to reach back with his right hand, trying to stop this behavior that was on the verge of losing control: "Stop, you hurt me from biting me."

The smooth back was bitten all over with tooth marks, deep and shallow pits, and flushes all over the fair skin. Compared with the straightforward nakedness, it felt more like breaking the abstinence.Fang Shaoyang lay down close to him, the blood all over his body was rushing down, and his masseter muscles could not resist shaking.

The bright moonlight finally returned to its original appearance, lightly sprinkled near the window, ashamed to reveal the forbearance of love.

He Qiao bit his lower lip tightly: "Enough, stop."

"Give me a few more minutes, and it will be fine soon." Fang Shaoyang stopped biting him, and instead buried his hands under him and twisted him, murmuring hoarsely while twisting, "Does it hurt, does it hurt, just bite me if it hurts." arm."

He Qiao was twisted so that his legs trembled, guessing that his thighs must have been bruised, his hands grabbed the bed sheet like a rag: "You bastard..."

"You can scold me, I don't care." Teeth clenched the firm and elastic back, "I just want him to know that you are mine, and if you are sensible, get out of here."

Fang Shaoyang couldn't force He Qiao, so he forcibly left countless marks on him, so that other people who took off his clothes would know that he belonged to someone else.It is tantamount to robbery.

He Qiao couldn't say a word.

The more he twisted Fang Shaoyang, the more agitated he became uncontrollably, the blue pole in front of his forehead throbbed suddenly, and his breathing became bigger and bigger, until he was squeezed until he couldn't breathe.He Qiao was sweating profusely, his whole body was wet as if he had just been fished out of the water, and there were countless teeth marks and other unspeakable marks all over his body.

The night of the entanglement was getting deeper and deeper, and Fang Shaoyang continued, wishing to brand every inch of his skin.Pain is pain, but He Qiao couldn't lie to himself. Not only did he not hate this kind of behavior from the bottom of his heart, but he was dazzled by this strong possessive desire, willing to be left with an indelible mark.

Just when he was about to lose himself, Fang Shaoyang asked confusedly: "He Qiao, do you hate me?"

He Qiao panted and shook his head.

"Then do you love me?"

He Qiao was silent for a moment.

Fang Shaoyang suddenly had a sore nose, pressed his waist and whispered, "I love you so much."

Just five words are the final word.The gaze that was staring at him was always fierce and perverted, but at this moment, there was a feeling of despair and tenderness.

In the boundless silence, He Qiao raised his hand to gently stroke his hair, but he pulled down his wrist and clenched it tightly.

"Do you know what love is?" He Qiao asked.

Tears rolled down Fang Shaoyang's eyes, and he nodded with all his strength, but he couldn't describe a word in his mouth.Maybe he really doesn't understand sweet talk, but he understands love, and he has understood it a long time ago.

what is love?

Love is irrationality, it is exclusivity, it is sex.