Mo Dongyang

Since entering the door, I have thought about running away more than once. I feel ashamed of my shameless behavior. A palace lady with heavy makeup conceals her eyes and goes to the residence of a man who has only met her three times, just like the dust in the brothel , Women unscrupulously undress and take off their clothes just to please their benefactors who spend a lot of money on themselves, but now I am dirtier than the brothel's cunt.I couldn’t help but think of the collection of books on the red cedar shelves of Zhilan Palace, such as “Nvjie”, “Nvvirtue”, and “Shixun”, these cultural and political education that I usually memorize by heart have now become great irony and ridicule. I felt an unprecedented panic, I didn't know what kind of posture I should take to face Li Shu after the day was over, countless voices in my heart were clamoring and begging to let me leave this room, they urgently wanted to tell If I didn't withdraw as soon as possible, I might not be able to resist what happened next, but even though the resistance in my heart was surging like an undercurrent, my feet seemed to be injected with a hundred catties of lead stone, so heavy that I couldn't move.

Yes, I can't go, I know the consequences of entering this room, and the consequences make me shudder with fear.I instinctively want to resist, but I still want to take a gamble.

However, I was caught in the quagmire of ethics and shame and couldn't extricate myself. I was quickly pulled back to reality. The general opposite picked me up, and now I am sitting on this man's lap in a shameful and shameful posture. I couldn't help exclaiming, my face flushed and I wanted to resist, but before the sound came out, my mouth was blocked, and the hot and hard tongue broke into my lips and teeth without warning, clumsily And sucking and sucking tentatively, my mouth was instantly filled with the smell of realgar wine, I tried to push him away, but my vague murmur seemed to him to refuse, and he couldn't wait to hug me up quickly I walked towards the inner room, and before I could even react, I was thrown heavily on the bed. He leaned on me, groping wildly with his huge palms, and the front of his chest was quickly ripped open, exposing his bare skin to the ground. In the biting air, many small bumps appeared. I was so ashamed that I hurriedly reached out my hand to cover it, but unexpectedly, the left side of my breast was flooded by a burst of heat and humidity, and the covering hand was strangled, and the exposed breasts and breasts were replaced by rough palms. It hurts so much.In the dark, tears could not stop streaming down the corners of my eyes, could this be the ending I wanted.

I shook my head, took a deep breath, and tried my best to push this man away from me.

"Brother Zhang, Qi Xin has something to say."

I hastily tidied up my messy clothes and didn't dare to look at the general who almost fell to the ground because of his defenselessness at this time, kneeling directly on the cold bluestone slab.Every trembling voice uttered between the lips and teeth was full of crying.

"Qi Xin was lucky enough to receive the General's pity in his three lives, it is already a blessing from God, and the General does not dislike the lowly status of a servant, and has never treated Qi Xin as a servant. To be loved so much by the General in this life, the servant is already grateful, The servant girl vowed to follow the general for the rest of her life and serve the general to repay all the general's affection. It's just that the servant girl is afraid. She is afraid that after being intimate with the general today, the servant girl will not be perfect. If she is found in the palace one day, I'm afraid, I'm afraid that the servant girl will never see the general again, so the servant girl prays to the general, whether the general can keep the servant girl's innocence in the palace, and only waits for the day when the servant girl is lucky enough to follow the general away from the imperial city, the servant girl does not ask for any name At the same time, it doesn’t matter if the general is a concubine or a servant, the slave is at the discretion of the general.”

I lowered my head and choked and my voice became smaller and smaller, tears kept dripping down, but I didn't dare to reach out to wipe it off, and soon a small pool of water stains formed on the ground.

Everyone knows what an absurd request this is. How can I, a lowly servant, have the right to make a request to a dignified third-rank general? That’s all, among the tens of thousands of court ladies, since he chooses you, he can also choose other people, because there are too many candidates who can replace him, but for me, what am I doing? Envious of the opportunity, but I am not satisfied yet.Perhaps there is no court lady who won such an honor like me, and who has no idea how high and earthly put forward two extremely rude conditions to the other party. She must not touch my body and at the same time take me out of the palace.

I don't know what kind of expression the other party has, and the other party has not given a reply for a long time. The whole room is terribly quiet, and I can almost hear the sound of my tears dripping on the ground. I am so nervous that my whole heart is about to jump out of my throat. Yes, I'm waiting, waiting for the answer I desperately want, but the wait is so long, so long that I almost mistakenly think that time has stopped.It's just that I can't wait like this forever, the thumping heart in my chest slowly quieted down, replaced by a piercing pain, I know that the pitiful expectations in my heart have been swallowed up by the huge despair do.

I think I lost.

After being silent for a long time, I sniffed my sore nose, slowly wiped away the tears from the corners of my eyes, and then looked up at the pair of eyes that could not see a wave at all.

"General, this servant knows that it is wishful thinking to put forward such a whimsical request to the general with such a worthless status as a servant. It is natural that the general cannot accept it. This servant does not want to make the general feel bad. This servant is wrong."

After I finished speaking, I closed my eyes and stretched out my hands to untie the loose skirts, and then went to the palace clothes, inner shirts, and middle clothes.I keep telling myself, Qi Xin, you still can't escape the ending you already know, this is your own choice regardless of the consequences, you must accept the reality with peace of mind.But even so, the tears gushed out of my eyes like a wild flood bursting an embankment, and I couldn't stop it at all. The two lines of tears slid down my jaw along the original track, and dripped continuously to my chest. This is the end of the matter, I There is no need to deliberately hide anything, I turned around blankly and prepared to walk towards the bed that was close at hand.

"no need!"

He finally spoke, stretched out his hand and pulled me back into his arms, the moment I turned around, I saw a trace of unbearable in his eyes, is he pitying me?

"No, since you don't want to, I won't force it. It's just why you don't believe me. Do you think I'm the same as other men? Do you think I just fell in love with your body? Do you think I'm just playing for fun? If It's really like this, I don't need to go to great lengths to get you to notice me, I can say hello to the Ministry of Internal Affairs after I met you for the first time, and you will become my woman in a short time, but I I don’t want to do this, I don’t want you to come with me unwillingly, but I have done this, why do you still not trust me, what do you want me to do, so that you will truly accept me?”

He held me in his arms so tightly that I could hardly breathe, but in the end, he let go, then picked up the palace gown on the ground and handed it to me.

"Put it on, I'm going out."

After speaking, he sighed slightly, turned and walked out the door.

"The slave is afraid... afraid that after the slave gives her body to the general, the general will no longer want the slave."

I dropped the clothes in my hands, stepped forward and hugged the man who was about to leave.

"Does the general know that my mother raised me alone when I was very young, but in the end she died of tuberculosis because her family was poor and had no money for medical treatment? My mother could not wait for the man from the capital until she died, because the man abandoned me. My mother was plagued by poverty and disease all her life, and I was not even ten years old when my mother died, but what she was thinking about before she died was not me, but the man who abandoned her. I am afraid...I am afraid of the general If you want me, I will be abandoned like my mother and die wronged, but I don't want to do this, I don't want to do this..."

I was almost stuck on his back, crying heartbreakingly and incoherently, hugging him tightly and not letting him go.

"Listen to me, I swear, I, Zhang Lei, will never be such a chaotic person. Since I have a physical relationship with you, I will definitely be responsible to the end. From now on, you will be my Don't worry, Zhang Lei's woman is gone, as long as the country of Qi wipes out the enemy country in the north, I will definitely take you out of the palace and take you to my hometown, I want all my fathers and villagers to know that you are my wife married by Zhang Lei's three matchmakers and five husbands."

He turned around and held up my head that I refused to lift abruptly, forcing me to look directly at him, and then hugged me tightly into his arms, as if I would disappear once he let go.

I was speechless, clutching his skirt tightly, buried in his arms and burst into tears without any scruples.I know that besides Li Shu, I can cry so disregarding the image in front of the second person, just because this person is Zhang Lei.