you are my nightmare

flowers fall, flowers bloom

the wind rises, the clouds move

clouds move, flowers fall

The wind is calm and the flowers are blooming

There is something not to love, because something is deeply loved.

When Allen saw this sentence written in the familiar graceful handwriting on the first page of Xie Xiaoyou's diary, his eyes that were red and swollen because of Xie Xiaoyou's death filled with tears again.

Xie Xiaoyou is always like this, she always doesn't know what she really wants, but she knows what she doesn't want better than anyone else.

When she is sad, I am satisfied that I can be by her side; when she is sick, I can stay by her side to take care of her, and I am satisfied; when she is hungry, I can cook for her a meal she loves The food I eat, I already feel that it is happiness...

To hide his feelings for her deeply, in fact, he simply didn't want to embarrass her, and didn't want to destroy the current relationship and mode of getting along between the two.

In Alan's view, as long as Xie Xiaoyou is happy, as long as Xie Xiaoyou is safe and well, then no matter what he does for her, he will have no regrets, even if he sacrifices his life.

Later, the person who had been watching for many years fell in love with someone. Although she felt uncomfortable, she silently blessed her. Soon she saw with her own eyes that the person she loved had a person who loved her hard-heartedly, and at the same time was also a person who made her bruised and bruised. Her choice is still the same as before, standing behind her, guarding her, I have always respected her choice, as long as she is happy, I am happy.

But now that she is dead, she finally clenched her hand, but she can no longer feel it. The hand that usually has little warmth is now even colder to the bone. It is not the temperature of a living person, but that of a dead person.Whether my long-term choice is right or wrong, standing behind her, giving her warmth and support, but not blocking her choice...

If he stopped her and Wan Qiyi from developing, maybe now, she is still alive in front of him.

She just left without leaving any last words, and even when she died, she was not by her side. She walked so peacefully, as if she had fallen asleep.

It was my own negligence, and I conceitedly believed that if I took care of her body so much, and she cooperated so actively, her strong spirit would support her, but...

But I forgot how weak her body has become. She can act like a normal person now, isn't it the result of her own recuperation?

She can live these few years, in fact, she has already earned money, but people are always dissatisfied!

Looking at Xie Ruiyu, who was holding Xie Xiaoyou's other hand beside him, with a sad expression and tears rolling down his face, the softest part of Alan's heart seemed to be pierced with a sharp knife.

Although this child is not very old, it is because of Xie Xiaoyou's memory that he behaves more like an adult. No matter his life experience or past memories, this child will include everything that Xie Xiaoyou may have forgotten in the depths of his memory. inherited.It's no wonder that she is so sad at the moment. Her biological mother, after going through so much and holding on for so long, finally did not resist her fate.

The relatives who had been by her side almost all the time since she was born, passed away like this, without even having time to say the last word, leaving quietly, how could it not make people feel sad!

This child knows better than anyone else what her mother has experienced, and knows how much effort her mother has made to spend more time with her. That's why this child shows such a sad and distressed expression. !

This child is sensible, but will this child really be willing to follow Xie Xiaoyou's idea and return to Wan Qiyi's side when he becomes an adult?

If this is really the case, then I have no excuse to stop it, let alone retain it!

This child is Xie Xiaoyou's life, it is Xie Xiaoyou's only persistence and persistence in the last period of time!

Everything about this child is Xie Xiaoyou's hope.

But Xie Xiaoyou seems to have forgotten that she has never really understood this child, she just blindly put all the doting she thought on this child, and gave this child all the beautiful smiles of her life, But she never noticed this child. Her understanding of her mother was better than her understanding of the child as a mother, and she could see through the other party's mind.

What Xie Xiaoyou was thinking, Xie Ruiyu could guess to a certain extent, but Xie Xiaoyou was not very clear about what Xie Ruiyu was thinking.

Her daughter knew far more about everything in this world than she thought.

Love, family affection, and friendship, in Xie Ruiyu's eyes, are actually no different from Xie Xiaoyou's.

In Xie Xiaoyou's eyes, there is no betrayal in love, family affection without asking for anything in return, and friendship without betrayal. In Xie Ruiyu's eyes, love is always the same. A friend, that friend is the child of Alan's godmother, named Ai Zhanyou.Although she looks like a delicate doll-like girl, but her personality is not good at all, but that child seems to like me very much, always sticking to me, choosing what to eat and what to use first To myself, everyone is still young now, who knows what the friendship between the two will be like in the future!

When Xie Ruiyu was holding Mommy's cold and stiff hand, she silently assured Mommy that she would be happy, because that was what Mommy wanted, and as long as it was what Mommy wanted, she would do it well, Mommy In the last days of her life, she lived in a lot of pain, was tortured by illnesses, and had to drink so much bitter medicine every day. Everything Mommy did was to spend more time taking care of herself.I actually knew it in my heart, but even if I knew it, I still didn't want Mommy to leave, I wanted Mommy to live, why so many bad people in this world didn't die, but Mommy, who was so kind and gentle, died Yes, is it true that good people don’t get rewarded?

Mommy once said that she hoped that she would live happily and innocently forever, but she never thought that there is no eternity in this world, and there is no long-term simplicity in this world. Really innocent people have long been eaten by this society. There are no bones left.

Mommy hopes that the exhaustion and pain she has gone through will not repeat the same mistakes, but some things are destined.

Just like I knew from birth that I was born in a different way from other children, and I also knew that some memories in my mind were passed down, not belonging to me, but to Mommy, everything about Mommy We all know, Mommy's childhood, Mommy's life, Mommy's habits, Mommy's preferences, Mommy's love...

But even if I knew it, I didn't understand why Mommy fell in love with Wan Qiyi, that white-eyed wolf, instead of falling in love with the godmother Alan who was as gentle as Feng Xiaoyu. Is it because the godmother hid her feelings too well?Or is it because the godmother is too perfect, protecting and supporting Mommy, so that Mommy's affection for her can only stop between sisters, and cannot pass through this relationship to become a lover?

Then what is Wan Qiyi based on?

She hurts Mommy, and brings bitterness to Mommy. Mommy also had a happy time with Wan Qiyi, but it was too short. Wan Qiyi's identity was doomed from the beginning. The white-headed one, but under Wan Qiyi's soft and hard-headed offensive, Mommy's heart was captured, and after getting Mommy's heart, did Wan Qiyi really cherish it?Mommy has done so much for her, and paid the price with her life, but what did Mommy get in the end?Mommy didn't even have her life, but she was still able to sing and sing every night, accompanied by new people every day... Mommy is so pitiful and sad, but even so, she still thinks about Wan Qiyi all the time.

I know everything about Mommy, but I still don't understand Mommy's feelings for Wan Qiyi.

Mommy always said that she would understand everything when she grew up, but she didn't know that she was the same mental age as her. Although she hadn't experienced everything she had experienced, she could empathize with it all.

Is love such a tragedy?

The one who loves deeply loses completely, and the one who surrenders his heart first is pale?

When Mummy died, she would wear the wedding ring Wan Qiyi gave her, and let that ring witness their love and her death. Mummy's love is too great and noble, so she suffers alone.

Wan Chengyi didn't even know that she was still alive, let alone that she was raising their two children by herself.

Mommy is a strong woman, and even a person who is so strong that people can be ashamed.

She can carry everything by herself without sharing it with anyone.

But Mummy has forgotten that even if she is strong, she is only a weak person fighting for love.

Only the weak can escape, only the weak can humblely hide in a dark corner where others cannot see, care about everything about the other party, and protect the other party.

Mommy, don't worry, I won't let you down.But I won't go to Wan Qiyi's side, I don't like that person, even if I know that you will be unhappy if I say this, and you will be angry if I do this, I will still do it.

Since you are already very tired and unable to wake up, let me continue your life!I will live well for you, I will be filial to my grandparents, I will take care of the uncles who killed the five gods, and I will treat my godmother Allen well, but I can't treat Wan Qiyi kindly.I hate her, because of her, I lost my mommy!

Mommy, I miss you so much, why do you have to endure the pain for such a person, why do you have to bear what you shouldn't have to bear?

Mommy, Xiao Yu misses you...

Mommy, you can go at ease...

Mommy, I won't go to Wanqi's house.But what belongs to you, I will take it back!As long as the business of the Wanqi family is expanded by you, I will take it back. It is Mommy's property, and no one is qualified to touch it.

And Wan Chengyi's father, Wan Chengtian, that dead old man, if he hadn't been vicious, Mommy, you wouldn't have left so early...

Mommy, I will definitely avenge you!

Mommy, I will repay everyone who makes you sad or hurts you...