Star II

Extra: Mu Haoyan's confession.

I was surrounded by a pack of sharks, waiting to eat my flesh.

After I was born, I was a tool for my parents to show off. I recited ancient poems and sang English songs in one relative’s house after another, and then got a face-squeeze from them.

At the age of ten, my younger brother was born. I lost my own name and changed my name to "brother".Brother, help my brother change a diaper.Brother, take my brother to the living room to play.Brother, teach my younger brother to read Pinyin...

At the age of 15, a stranger appeared at home, claiming to be a scout.After listening to the advertising fee and salary sharing, my parents said "what do children know", and then sold me to the company in the name of my good name.

So, I got my name back.

"Hao Yan, isn't that big star from your company? Get me an autograph."

"Yanyan, look at your cousin is so beautiful, it's a pity not to be an actress, as an elder, you can help take care of her."

"Brother Mu, you artists earn so much money, lend me some..."

I know all too well what I have, what I lack, what these people want from me.

I made my debut on a talent show, and my fans exceeded one million. Everyone thought that I was going to soar, including myself.

My strength is the strongest in the group. I practiced day and night and rejected countless temptations. I thought I was finally going to be seen, but the fact gave me a merciless slap.

My resources are constantly divided up. The rich second generation in the group go to the nightclub for one night, and the next day they don’t even read the script. As soon as the program is edited and broadcast, it is the image of a witty and humorous sunny boy.

My company does not give me any long-term planning at all, and keeps arranging commercial performances, trying to cash in on my popularity in the shortest possible time and drain the wallets of fans.I am not worthless for myself, only for my fans.I saw several girls who followed me to more than a dozen cities. They put all their time, money, and energy on me, but they couldn't even see a decent performance.

At that time, I always comforted myself, without the support of my family or the company, at least I had the support of my fans.

But soon, once again, I paid the price for my naivety.

The group members became more and more unscrupulous, hosting parties, dating P, and sleeping fans, and finally couldn't hold it anymore. Once they were photographed, revelations were flying all over the sky.

In order to keep them, the company issued a statement using my account, declaring that I was there, and it was just an ordinary gathering of friends.

In the photos with solid evidence, the girls are all sitting on their laps. Unless they are deceiving themselves, no one can believe it.

For a while, all the firepower of public opinion was focused on me, and my fans had to defend me while being disappointed.

I just watched those little girls being scolded, but I didn't have a password for my own account.

absurd.

For a moment, I had the idea of ​​quitting the circle.

I began to doubt myself, maybe I'm not that good, I can't be a good artist.

The manager also kept saying that I was big and told me to lose weight, saying that the youthful look is popular nowadays, and that I can't be an idol at all with this appearance, and can only be a supporting role for others for the rest of my life.

He said that I was born with no advantages, and that I was lucky to debut, and that I borrowed the bonus from the rich second generation.

I'm not stupid, I borrowed many books on psychology because of self-loathing after I developed a hatred for my family as a teenager.

But I am disappointed.

At the age of 21, I violated the company's regulations for the first time, sneaking out of the dormitory, sitting in the park in front of my house, staring at the sky in a daze.

When I wanted to escape, I found that I had no harbor.My parents will not comfort me, care about me, they will even contact the company to take me back.

At six o'clock in the morning, the small park is quiet, only two old men are dancing Tai Chi.

I took off my mask, conflicted in my heart not wanting to be discovered, but also wanting a passer-by to call out my name.

Very ridiculous.

The meaning of my life is in other people's mouths.

Then I saw him.

That young man was as beautiful as an angel, with a pair of clear eyes, pure and innocent.

He also stared at me for a long while, and then suddenly smiled brightly at me.

For a moment, I thought to myself, if he is my fan, I am willing to be satisfied whether it is an autograph or a group photo.

However, he doesn't know me.

He looked at me with warm eyes, and said with an unreserved admiration: "You are so perfect, can you be my sketch model?"

It was only then that I noticed that he was carrying a drawing board behind his back.

I couldn't refuse his eyes, he looked at me as if he saw the truth, goodness and beauty in the whole world.

Under the gaze of the young man, it seems that I am not a failed person, but an omniscient and omnipotent god.

I am his Apollo, his Aphrodite, his muse.

It's like having a summer dream.

I spent two hours with the boy, and there was no communication between us. At one point, I even thought that it was a fantasy under my frustration.

In order to give myself the courage to continue, I created a fictional character.

Until, I saw his picture on the news.

Xu Yien, the only son of actress Jin Lan, is 15 years old and lives abroad.

What a wonderful fate that allowed us to meet in a dilapidated park that no one cares about. Thinking about it now, he probably ran away from home at that time, trying to attract his mother's attention.

At the beginning, I didn't think about what kind of entanglement I would have with him. I just thought that if I had the opportunity to meet again, I should say thank you to him.

Six years passed in a flash.

My life has gone through many changes, and I have changed three managers.

After learning that the company took over "Little Baby Big Star" without consulting me, I realized that the company wanted to abandon me.

Even though I have no conflicts with the company and no scandals, but as my contract expires and my value rises, the new contract will inevitably have a big change in the share, and in order to maintain my image and exposure, they have to spend a lot of money. More money is spent on public relations, screening and fighting for high-quality resources. Instead of working so hard, it is more convenient and affordable to re-promote an artist.

I will never be slaughtered like before, I don't want to be a short-lived traffic, I want to be an evergreen tree that stands upright.

Although I knew I couldn't refuse, I still pretended to be embarrassed and refused to sign the contract. I didn't agree until director Lin of the program group and the TV station leader came forward in person, so that at least Director Lin would think that he owed me a favor. One more way out.

It was a surprise that Xu Yien appeared on the list.

Director Lin asked me to take care of him more, I already had this intention, and after I calmly agreed, I asked for an extra favor from her.

I have a vague feeling that Xu Yien may be my lucky general.

Before the official meeting, I sent him a message, and his reaction was unexpected and reasonable.

During the conversation, he didn't seem to know me.

Maybe he doesn't pay much attention to domestic entertainment news abroad.

Will he be surprised when we actually meet? I imagined that scene and couldn't help smiling.

The assistant asked if I was okay.

I smiled and replied: "It's almost here."

I rushed to the shooting location non-stop, because the time was too short, I couldn't catch up with him right away, so I could only find another chance during the break.

And this reunion, his facial features opened up a bit, he was still as beautiful as an angel, his eyes were still burning hot, and he even stared at me like no one else.

I am no stranger to that kind of eyes that only see me alone, it is exactly the same as six years ago.

The moment I met his eyes, I understood.

He doesn't remember me.

During the post-production part of the show, the director team asked me what I thought of Xu Yien.

I smiled and said he was like a child.

Xu Yien is not a pure angel, but a child who makes people love and hate, innocent and cruel.

Whenever he sees a toy he likes, he will love it and will not give up until he achieves his goal. But once he gets it, he will quickly dislike it and look for a new goal.

I was the toy he had thrown once, and I was completely erased from his memory.

The author has something to say: Thanks to the little angel who irrigated the nutrient solution: Abu 5 bottles;