After the fake marriage, we two HE

Fate has no justice, no justice, no purpose.

Song Mianyu didn't know how she hung up the phone.

He said he could bear any bad news, but when Dr. Lin told him, his voice trembled, and tears welled up in his eyes.

Xiao Rufei didn't know what happened, hugged him and asked, "What's the matter? What's the matter Song Mianyu?"

Song Mianyu just cried and said, "Mom...I want to find my mother..."

He was still holding the cute Kodak in his hand, crying like a child, unable to utter a complete sentence.

Xiao Rufei could only hear clearly that he wanted to find his mother.

He took him to find him, sat in the car with Song Mianyu in his arms, and asked the driver to drive to the hospital where Song Shuya was.

During the nearly one-hour journey, Song Mianyu kept crying.

At the end of the crying, there was no sound, just lying in Xiao Rufei's arms and twitching, tears kept streaming.

"Mianmian, don't be like this." Xiao Rufei knew Song Shuya's situation from Song Mianyu's intermittent choking, his throat was so bitter that he couldn't even comfort him, "Let's go to the best hospital and find the best doctor .”

He hugged Song Mianyu tightly, as if this would give Song Mianyu some strength, but even he himself knew that his comfort was so pale.

Pancreatic cancer has the lowest survival rate among all malignant tumors. It is usually discovered in the middle and advanced stages and deteriorates rapidly. Most patients die within half a year of diagnosis. There is no specific medicine so far, and surgery is difficult.

Xiao Rufei knew about this disease because he donated to a charity project a few years ago, which included patients with pancreatic cancer. The list of donations is often updated, and some names will be erased after only appearing on the list once, because These people are gone.

The more he understood, the more he knew that there was no miracle, but he couldn't tell Song Mianyu this.

Xiao Rufei has a calmness far beyond that of ordinary people, so she can only prepare herself in her heart. If there is a day, he will be Song Mianyu's only reliance.

It was nine o'clock in the evening when we arrived at the hospital. Dr. Lin was on duty tonight and hadn't come home yet.

Seeing someone coming with Song Mianyu, she felt a little more relaxed. She hung up the phone just now, and she was always worried that something would happen if Song Mianyu came in a hurry.

Song Mianyu first went to see Song Shuya outside the ward. She was still asleep, sitting by the head of the bed, reading a storybook.

He looked at her through the glass window. His mother was no longer young, but the way she looked down at the book was almost the same as the way he remembered when he was a child.

In Dr. Lin's office, Song Mianyu was sitting and flipping through Song Shuya's examination report. He couldn't understand it, so Dr. Lin explained it to him.

"Maybe it's because her body knows she's sick, but her mental state has improved a lot recently. Don't you think it's amazing? Today she suddenly told me that she wanted to go home and that her son was coming to pick her up." Lin The doctor said, "She's never said this to me seriously before."

Hearing this, Song Mianyu almost collapsed, and tears poured out from the dry lacrimal gland.

There is no history of mental illness in their family. My mother became like this because of the stimulation of my father's death.It wasn't serious at first, but he didn't have money to treat her, so he could only find ways to make her happy, but it became more and more serious later.

In the summer of his college entrance examination, Song Shuya suddenly went crazy. He originally planned to take her to school, but he had to give up because her condition worsened.

It persisted like this for half a year, he took care of her while working, and locked her in the room during the day. It was not until later that Song Mianyu realized that it was very dangerous to lock the mentally ill at home alone. .

This incident made Song Mianyu decide to send her to a mental hospital. He seemed to be relieved, as long as he worked hard to earn money, but there was no moment in his heart that he blamed himself and felt guilty. He often asked himself whether it was right to send her mother to a mental hospital. Yes.

Song Mianyu was thinking, if she hadn't sent her mother here and they lived together, and he took care of her personally, would her mother not have this disease?

Even if they have this disease, they have lived together for so many years, wouldn't they be so regretful that they missed these few years?

Now that he has finally paid off his debts and has a little savings, maybe he can buy a smaller house, and he can take her back, but her time is running out.

He promised in his heart that he would buy back their original house and replant the flowers his mother liked in the garden.Perhaps these promises never have a chance to be fulfilled.

Song Mianyu shuffled out of Dr. Lin's office, opened the door and saw Xiao Rufei standing in the corridor waiting for him.

He was like a man sentenced to death, like a walking corpse, as if he would fall down at any time.

But Xiao Rufei hugged him, her warm body and solid chest were like a protective wall that could protect him.

"Xiao Rufei..." Song Mianyu heard her own voice, hoarse and rough, mixed with crying, "I want to take my mother home..."

After a long time, Xiao Rufei said, "Okay, let's go home together."

In the silent corridor at night, during the time Xiao Rufei was waiting just now.

He listened to Song Mianyu's suppressed crying inside the door, and next to his ears were the sighs of several nurses at the nurse's station. They were talking about Song Mianyu, the first time the child came to the hospital, and why Song Shuya got sick. Said that this child could have gone to a top university to study, how hard it is to work, all kinds of...

Xiao Rufei seemed to see through someone else's mouth, through the long time, a thin figure, walking alone in the busy life.

The Song Mianyu he sees now has grown into his favorite appearance, optimistic, lively, kind, and well-behaved.But all these beautiful qualities do not come from the warmth of the happy garden, but the flowers of adversity that bloom on the cliffs after experiencing hardships.

He suddenly remembered that that time when Song Mianyu passed out, the doctor said that Song Mianyu was anemic and malnourished.When they were on the bed, he hugged the boy in his arms. He was so skinny and lonely that he couldn't bear to use his strength.

Just thinking about it, Xiao Rufei felt heartache and couldn't breathe.

He doesn't understand whether some people are born with unfortunate genes, and this misfortune will surround them throughout their lives. It is fate, it cannot be avoided, and it cannot be resisted.

It was him, and it was Song Mianyu.

Fate has no justice, no justice, no purpose.Therefore, it is impossible to think about it, and it is inevitable to encounter it.

...

Song Mianyu almost didn't think about it, and immediately went through the discharge procedures for Song Shuya. He didn't have time to think too much, but there seemed to be a voice in his heart that kept urging him, as if he couldn't wait any longer.

After packing up Song Shuya's things, Song Mianyu came out of the ward holding her hand, and the moment she saw Xiao Rufei, Song Shuya suddenly lost control of her emotions.

She was very scared, and hid behind Song Mianyu in fear, refusing to come out no matter what.

This reaction was the same as when she saw Xiao Rufei for the first time, when she saw Xiao Rufei, she uttered Xiao Cheng's name.

Xiao Rufei didn't hear it that day, but Song Mianyu did.

It was this strange reaction and the diary that made Song Mianyu know what Xiao Cheng had done to their family.

That night was New Year's Eve, after Song Mianyu knew the truth about her father's death, apart from being sad, all she could think about was Xiao Rufei.

Xiao Rufei didn't know the past of the grievances between the two of them.

He thought, Xiao Rufei is so kind, she will be sad when she finds out.So he chose to digest this matter alone, and then suppress this secret forever.

Song Mianyu was very afraid that her mother would say something suddenly, so she could only comfort her as much as possible, and then said to Xiao Rufei, "Xiao Rufei, you go first, she is just sick, she doesn't hate you."

Every word is very sad, because he may not be able to tell his mother that he and Xiao Rufei are together, who is Xiao Rufei...

Because this is another kind of injury to mom.

Song Mianyu hugged Song Shuya, blocking her sight with her body.

Xiao Rufei could only see his back.

Xiao Rufei turned and left, his footsteps were as heavy as lead. Of course he knew why Song Mianyu's mother didn't like him and was afraid of him.

The first time they met, she was afraid of him. At that time, he didn't know the reason, but he knew it now. Maybe Song Mianyu didn't know how terrifying his face was in Song Shuya's heart.

He was very sad, because he couldn't get Song Shuya's approval.He once thought that one day, he would tell Song Shuya personally that I like your son very much, please feel free to hand him over to me.But now what qualifications does he have to say such a thing?

But he couldn't tell Song Mianyu that Dr. Lin's phone call interrupted what he was going to say.

Song Mianyu was already so sad, he couldn't make him sad anymore.

Xiao Rufei's departure made Song Shuya settle down.Dr. Lin gave Song Mianyu a pamphlet, which contained Song Shuya's routine and little habits in the hospital, and how to deal with any situation.

Dr. Lin: "Contact me any time you encounter problems, even at night."

"Thank you." Song Mianyu bowed to her.

Then thank the nurses in the hospital.

Xiao Rufei left, but left the car with them and asked the driver to take them home.

Song Mianyu was sitting in the car and received his WeChat.

Xiao Rufei: I'm staying in a hotel tonight, so call me if you need anything.

He was afraid that Song Shuya would be irritated again when he saw him, so he didn't go home.

Song Mianyu didn't know what to say, and felt sorry, as if he had been wronged.

It was very late when I got home, the room was not cleaned up, Song Shuya slept in Song Mianyu's room.

Song Mianyu couldn't sleep, so she checked a lot of information about pancreatic cancer and read a lot of papers, including domestic ones and foreign ones.

The more he checked, the more disappointed he was, the more he looked, the more hopeless he felt, and he added several patient groups overnight.

Look at other people's illness experience, family members' nursing experience.

A girl said that her mother lived for two years from the time she was diagnosed to her death. The whole family kept it from her mother. Although her mother felt unwell, she didn't know what disease she had until she died. They traveled around and went out. Playing, I went to the end very happily, and there was no particularly severe pain during the period.

This seemed to be the best ending he had seen.

Some patients have been treated with chemotherapy in the hospital, but they deteriorate faster, and the patients themselves are in great pain.

The room was very dark, only a sleeping lamp was on, Xiao Rufei bought it for him in case he would have nightmares.

The computer screen was still on, and there were dense foreign language documents.

Song Mianyu was lying in front of the bed, looking at Song Shuya's sleeping state, she was clearly fine, how could she be sick?

She didn't know that she was sick, and she came here because she was very happy to see cookie, and said she wanted to cuddle the dog to sleep.

Song Mianyu took out the jade bracelet she bought for her and put it on for her.

In the past, he always thought that there would be a future. He wanted to wait for her to recover, buy her beautiful clothes and jewelry, take her out to play and go shopping, learn photography well, and then take many photos of her.

However, it turned out that there was no future.

Song Mianyu leaned against the floor-to-ceiling windows, the curtains were parted, and outside was a garden paved with silver and gray.

He thought a lot, thinking about life, thinking about death, thinking about his father, thinking about birth, old age, sickness and death, and the impermanence of fate...

Xiao Rufei stood in the garden, raised her head, and stared at him for a long time.

I don't know how long it has passed, but it is almost dawn.

The moment he turned to leave, he seemed to hear footsteps behind him.

Perhaps it was an illusion, Xiao Rufei snuffed out that trace of delusion in her heart.

But the footsteps were getting closer and closer, Xiao Rufei's heart ached and tightened with the footsteps, until someone hugged him behind him.

Song Mianyu hugged him, her voice was pitiful, "Xiao Rufei, will you stay with me forever?"

Xiao Rufei's heart ached so much that her chest throbbed.

"I will," he said, "will always be with you"