our psalms

As soon as the phone was turned on the next day, Lao Cao called.I hesitated for a long time before answering, I thought he was going to yell at me again, but in fact his voice was much gentler.

"Are you home safely? How is your dad?"

"fine……"

"Don't think too much, you know, since you have already gone back, spend more time with your father, I will ask you for leave at school."

"I want to know one thing!"

"what?"

"If all that is true, what will happen to my dad?"

"..."

"Please speak!!!!"

"You know Cheng'er, the most important thing for a man is to learn to be strong."

"I don't want to listen to this kind of nonsense, I want you to tell me, what will happen?!"

"Wang Zicheng, don't act like this!!!" On the other end of the phone, Lao Cao's voice became louder and louder, "Your father doesn't want to see you like this, do you know that there are many things we can't do, we can only face it calmly right!"

"Facing it calmly means hiding it from me?" I asked back, "Would you wait until my uncle was arrested by the police and squatted in prison before you let me know?!"

"This is your father's wish. He doesn't want you to see him like this. He loves you so much!"

"You won't understand, I lost my mother early, and I can't live without my uncle anymore!" As I spoke, my tears flowed again, "I don't know why it became like this."

"Be strong, kid."

"I can't live without him!"

Before Lao Cao finished speaking, I hung up the phone.At this time, there was no one in my father's room. I stomped my feet anxiously, and kept scolding myself for falling asleep. It was already past noon, and I called my father, only to find that he didn't bring his phone on the sofa in the living room.I sat limply on the floor, wondering where he would go.I pretended to be strong to make myself rational and rational, and I knew that no matter what happened at this moment, I could not be defeated by any psychological pressure.Suddenly, I thought of a place where my father would most likely go...

It's almost autumn and the weather is getting cooler.My hometown is not a big but cultural city with a lot of heritage. This place has developed from the tourist industry of scenic spots and historical sites. No matter where I go, the streets are very clean, and there are tall plane trees growing on both sides of the road. , At this time, the leaves of the sycamore trees have begun to turn yellow, and the wind will inadvertently blow from a distance. No matter where you are, you can always vaguely see a few leaves floating in the air.Walking on the long trail, my heart fell into a deep desolation unknowingly.If God really exists, I suddenly want to ask him: Why is it so unfair to me? !

Sure enough, my father was there, in front of my mother's tombstone.I saw his figure from a distance, he was only wearing a light shirt, standing there motionless like a log.

Today's cemetery looks particularly quiet, as if deliberately trying to create such a desolate and lonely atmosphere for us.I slowly walked past the rows of tombstones of the dead. Is life really like the stars in the sky, falling quietly at any inadvertent time, or is life just to wait for that scene?

My mother's sudden departure seemed to be vivid again. That was the only time I saw my strong father cry. We were like inseparable individuals, cuddling tightly together. I sobbed loudly while feeling my father's wet tears Silently dripping on my face.

Now, he is crying again.I've seen too many father tears these days.He wanted to confide something, but he was powerless. Looking at his father, who was his most tenacious and firmest support from beginning to end, it was like a mountain, but now it was about to collapse silently. I had no idea what I should do. How to face it.

I walked up to him, and the two of them hugged each other tightly indifferently without saying anything, crying.

"I'm sorry, Ah Hui." The father choked on his mother's tombstone and said, "I just want to do more for our children. Am I wrong?"

"Uncle, you are not wrong, you are always right in my heart!"

"Son, can you listen to your uncle? No matter what, you can't be overwhelmed by difficulties, any difficulties. One day, uncle will be gone. Can you be strong?"

"I will, uncle, I will!" I wiped away my tears and looked at him, "Uncle will be fine, uncle will always be by my side!"

"The more you say that, the more heartbroken my uncle will be. Zicheng, you are no longer a child!"

"Yes, I am no longer a child, so I will try my best to help my uncle and myself." I said, "Now, uncle, go abroad!"

"what are you saying?!"

"I said, let's go!" I looked very determined, "Let's go together, there are too many things like this, isn't it, you are just unlucky, uncle, we can't be at the mercy of fate like this!"

After hearing what I said, my father's face was very heavy. He looked at me in disbelief and said, "Why do you think so, isn't uncle wrong enough?"

"There is no complete conclusion about right and wrong in this world. Uncle, you are right and I am right, okay? Let's escape from this wrong place, let's escape from this wrong world!"

"You can't think like that!" Uncle grabbed my shoulders tightly, "Wang Zicheng, you can't have such thoughts, uncle is wrong or wrong, and you can't have that kind of thinking!"

"Wrong?" I looked at him suspiciously, "Do you want to cruelly take away my father's love, uncle? Is this right?"

"Slap—" my father suddenly slapped me on the cheek. He almost didn't think he would hit me so suddenly. For a moment, he felt very regretful. Since he was a child, he has never been right. I said anything harsh, let alone hit me.

"Yes..." He was about to say something.And I already ran out of his sight quickly with tears of grievance.

"I'm sorry..." My father knelt down silently as he watched my receding figure. "God, save my child!!!!!!"

It was getting dark, and I was sitting alone on the public rest chair by the road. I felt that during this period of time, many unexpected things came to me. I couldn't find myself in the messy thoughts, and I couldn't return. Once upon a time.The appearance of Lao Cao, and Xiaodong, but now it seems that these are nothing, even the clear and tall shadow of my father is gradually blurring, what should I do, what else can I do?

I stood up and continued walking endlessly.Suddenly, I felt that the light of neon lights was so pale that I couldn't even see myself clearly.

I squatted by the Jialing River, weeping helplessly.The sound of the surging river is enough to bury everything, including my fragility.

I don't know when, I felt a pair of strong hands gently on my shoulders.I raised my head slowly, it was that familiar smile, kind and kind.

I threw myself into his arms, this man who broke into my life suddenly, the man who witnessed the biggest turning point in my life this time - Lao Cao.

"Be good, don't cry, isn't this uncle still here!" He who has always been serious and cautious suddenly looks so approachable at this moment, although it is difficult for me to tell which state of him is the real him, but at this moment I can only Knowing that I really need his comfort.

"He doesn't want me anymore!" I choked up and said.

"No, uncle won't want you!"

"He still hit me..."

"You must have made him angry." Lao Cao hugged me and sat on a chair by the side of the road, "Listen to Uncle and be brave, okay?"

"Tell me, why is this happening?"

"Actually, do you know how much your father cares about you?" Lao Cao said, "From the day he recognized you as a baby, he told me all these things, and I helped him think of many ways. However, the law is There is no way to resist. And what he is most worried about is you, Wang Zicheng! He tried every means to make me hide it from you, and tried every means to make me take good care of you. Of course, I would do it if he didn't say it. But you You must understand your father's painstaking efforts!"

My tears kept flowing out, and I couldn't say anything.

"You will know sooner or later. I told Lao Wang long ago. Since you already know, child, you must learn to face it with strength. No one in this world is smooth sailing. Only through suffering can you know happiness. What does it taste like!"

"All of this..." I stammered, "It was so sudden, I..."

"I know you may not be able to accept it for the time being, but you must know that there is still my uncle here, and I love you no less than your biological father. Will you believe it?"

"..."

"Everything will be fine, trust me!" Lao Cao said, hugging me tightly again.He kept patting me on the shoulder and comforting me.The man in the police uniform is completely different from the man who is taking off the uniform now, but no matter what time it is, I am always destined to be defeated by what he says.