The male protagonist becomes a monster in minutes and wants to eat me

Hey……

bang bang bang——

"Wow - someone jumped off the building -"

"Wow, wow, this is the seventh time this month, the second time today, okay?"

"Eh(⊙o⊙)?" It's only been three days this month, is this pace too fast?

"Hurry up and keep up!"

After the man finished speaking, he ran towards the accident point, shouting as he ran, "It's not good, my little uncle fell down from the stairs again..."

........................

A person with a normal mind falls from upstairs almost twice a day, and no one will believe him when he tells it.

But let alone, every time this person wakes up, he refuses to admit that he jumped the building, and even looks at everyone with an idiot face.

Everyone who was regarded as an idiot by my junior uncle: ... Well, you accidentally fell down the stairs... Your body is indestructible, won't you feel pain?

Continue to look at the little uncle who is looking at everyone idiotically: ...

All idiots: ...

Well, no matter whether it is a jump or a fall, there must be a reason in the final analysis, right!

After a few days of close observation by everyone, the conclusion is that—————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————— Shuangxiu, neither demonic cultivation nor Taoist cultivation, nor demonic cultivation, Buddha cultivation, but the well-known double-cultivation in your mind!cough cough...

——In the world of cultivating immortals, double cultivation, as the name suggests, is to find a good (basic) friend who shares the same goals, and we will rub each other together, and then biu will be promoted...and be sent flying by pia——

Asking the paired Taoist couples in the world of cultivating immortals, the answer is——

Shuangxiu is very good. Shuangxiu not only greatly increases the cultivation base, but also increases the relationship between each other, such as which posture is comfortable, which position is suitable, and which kind of double cultivation is cool, right? My dear... being pia-flyed— —

So, dear friends, let’s double repair!Let the double cultivation go to the end!mwah!Fly by pia——

Author, please stop making trouble, our little martial uncle is very cold in the first place, and is the most beautiful young flower among the martial uncle ranks in the sect, okay? (As the youngest martial uncle in the sect with a good cultivation base, he is indeed [-] times more beautiful than his master and other martial uncles——)

The little uncle usually speaks very little, and sometimes he can't even see his slender figure for a year, because he was pushed-sold by you people to double cultivation, and the result--as a result, his whole body is not good !

Those old Taoist nuns, unshaven beards, and this and that with freckles on their faces and gold teeth in their mouths—all of them are not good enough for our little uncle, okay?Damn, isn't this the same as the author's place?

The author marvels: what is the same?

Everyone said in unison: Blind date!

The author's brain is wide open: Huh?Double cultivation = blind date? ! (⊙o⊙) Damn it, I'm raising my posture!For the author, a blind date is a sad realization!

Ask, is there anyone in this world who has never been on a blind date? Answer: Damn, there really isn’t one

The author was knocked down in an instant, with blood on his face!Little Martial Uncle Hug, I understand you!

Little Martial Uncle Gets Up and Kicks Fly Author: Get out——

Yes, yes, there is another very important point, that is, our little uncle has a serious cleanliness habit, and he will faint when touched.If you think about the fact that he is forced to meet those strange (?) fellow Taoists every day, how can it be so embarrassing!

But according to the latest news just now, there was a person who touched the little uncle, and the little uncle didn't get sick!That person is our neighbor of Qixuanzong, Lu Yunqing who is also from the Immortal Cultivation Sect Yulingzong.

Lu Yunqing, a girl.

Wow, the comedy is that the little master finally found a Taoist partner who can practice both. The tragedy is that the little master was rejected harshly, okay?fall--

Thinking of the cold-faced little uncle who went to confess to others, but was rejected, what a sad blow it was!

So our disciples and grandchildren came to the conclusion that our little uncle was rejected because of his bad cultivation, and he couldn't think of jumping off a building to commit suicide!

………………

At this time, an old man with white hair and wearing a black Taoist robe pushed away the crowd and threw himself on the unconscious man on the ground. While everyone was stunned, he slapped and pinched the unconscious man's face. While crying and howling, "Oh, my good apprentice!"

——Oh, let me go, this kid’s skin is so fair and tender

"!!!!!!"

——Master, what are you doing all the time?Don't touch the little junior brother (uncle) unconsciously, okay?Junior brother (uncle) has a cleanliness freak!

The old man pretended not to hear, wiped his tears with one hand, and continued to walk on the man's body with the other, "Disciple, if you don't want to practice dual cultivation, I won't force you as a teacher. Why are you seeking death?"

"!!!!!!"

——Master, the junior brother (uncle) will jump up and kick you!Really will!

The old man continued to shout indiscriminately, "Don't you know that you already have a baby bump in your body, you can't die if you just jump off the building like this, if you really want to die, just crush it... Ah, no, my good apprentice, when will you kill me?" Wake up..." Ever since this kid became sensible, he has treated others with a cold look, even treating him the same as his master. He is really an unfilial disciple.If it wasn't for the stagnation in cultivation, I'm afraid this little apprentice didn't know where to hide and practice.

——Everyone covered their faces and turned their heads to blacken...

Master, don’t take you to be so old and disrespectful, let people think about it, take advantage of the younger brother (uncle), and mislead everyone, what does it mean to have a baby bump in the body, the younger brother (uncle) is just a pill That's all, it looks like she's pregnant... And master, my junior brother (uncle) said that he fell off a building and didn't jump off a building (is there a difference?), don't teach him to kill himself by destroying his pill!

Seeing that it was getting late, the senior brother stood up quickly, "That master, can we carry the little junior brother into the room?" If he doesn't come out to stop the master's nonsense, the little junior brother will not fall to his death, I will be crushed (gas) to death by the master.

"Oh oh oh," Master Tianling immediately recovered his expression, without the exaggeration before, and said to his disciples and grandchildren solemnly, "You guys, quickly carry Lingfeng in, oh yes, remember to carry him Carry it through the clothes, your little uncle has a cleanliness, huh."

Uh ⊙o⊙)...Master Master, do you remember that the little uncle has a cleanliness habit?That just now...

Seeing that no one was moving, Tianling coughed lightly and said, "Hey, don't hurry up!"

Several disciples and grandchildren ran over immediately, "Yes, the master!"

So several people carried the unconscious little uncle into his room through the clothes——

***

In the antique house, a wisp of cigarette smoke is floating slowly, and it smells like sandalwood for spiritual nourishment.On the bed in the middle, lay a sleeping person, the corners of his mouth slightly curled up, as if he was having a sweet dream...

"Um... delicious..."

"Ah, another piece..."

Senior brother Li Lingyun looked at the person who had been awake for a long time on the bed, and asked, "Master, are you sure that little junior brother is all right?"

Master Tianling stroked Bai Huahua's beard, and said uncertainly, "It should be all right, because Master just gave him his pulse."

Li Lingyun thought for a long time, and felt that there is one thing that must be made clear to the master, that is, "Master, in the future, I think it is better not to introduce those people to the younger brother." Now the whole sect is saying that the younger brother will fall off the building , was rejected because of broken love.He didn't want his junior brother to continue to be sad...

Tian Ling nodded, "Uh, I'll consider this matter, but your junior brother's cultivation level..."

Li Lingyun said, "Since external forces can't help the younger brother, then we will find high-quality medicinal materials to help the younger brother." When the cave opened, he led all the brothers in to find the elixir for the younger brother!

Tian Ling nodded in satisfaction, "Well, I can feel at ease in this way."

"Master, I..." When Li Lingyun was about to say something, he was startled by the person sitting up on the bed.

"I'm going, who told you to grab my coke f---, I'm so thirsty—uh..." Huh, where is this?

A room full of antique atmosphere?besides……

Stop, pause for a moment, let us observe everything he sees from the perspective of the protagonist Liu Shuo——

Who is this little Jiujiu with bristling hair, a wooden hairpin, and a middle-aged man in a black and white Taoist robe?That splayed mustache really has personality!But why did he stare at Laozi as if he had eaten a fly?And that smiling old man with chrysanthemums blooming all over his face, even though you smiled kindly at me, Master Meringue is still very scared!

So let's talk about it here, what is the situation?So the proposition is as follows -

1. What if a person finds himself in a dreamlike fantasy scene after waking up?

2. What if a person wakes up and finds himself being stared at by two strangers of the same sex?

3. After a person wakes up, he finds that he is in a dreamlike fantasy scene while being stared at by two men of the same sex in strange costumes?

4. Is it because I got up in the wrong posture just now?Then I'll do it all over again!Lie down, close your eyes, get up, take a deep breath, open your eyes—

your sister—

"Little little junior brother, are you awake?" Li Lingyun was baffled by the series of behaviors of the junior brother. Is the junior brother awake or awake?

Liu Shuo habitually showed his eight white front teeth, and said with a smile, "This fellow Taoist uncle, what did you call me just now?"

Junior brother?He heard it right, "Aren't you guys filming TV dramas? Oh, yes, there is also cosplay! Yes, coser!" If it's a theater, apologize and take a photo and leave here, if it's a coser, then he will follow They took a group photo to commemorate, leaving here... (Actually, your focus is on taking a group photo, right!)

Wow, the junior brother actually laughed. A person who had been aloof for a long time suddenly smiled at him. How earth-shattering it was!Li Lingyun was so dazed that he didn't recover for a long time.The little junior brother laughed, he has dimples!cute~

The master Tianling next to him asked, "Theatre? Cut to death? Good apprentice, what is that?"

Ignoring the other party's 'good apprentice', Liu Shuo said unwillingly, "It's just—" Why is he wearing the same clothes as the Taoist priest with a beard?Although the color was a bit bluer, but...he touched his head, that familiar little Jiujiu, that wooden hairpin...your sister!It's the same dress as the bearded uncle in front of him!Convex! ! !Also, these slender and delicate fingers like white jade are not his hands!As an otaku, although he doesn't see the light of day, his parents' genes are there. He's a yellow man, okay?

Could it be that the way he went out today was wrong, or that he shouldn't go outing with those funny guys, is he an otaku?There is no reason for an otaku to go out for an outing and take pictures!And that buddy, what kind of flash was turned on by the camera in broad daylight, Nima dazed Laozi's eyes, fainted, and then woke up... Fuck me... Isn't today April Fool's Day? It's already May Day Okay?

"——Where is this place? Who are you?" So tell me quickly, this is just a whole-player game, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I