father - home

Leaving the monastery, boarding and disembarking, Zhao remained silent and expressionless.I am very worried, and I am more worried about him than my own depression and discomfort.

As soon as he landed, Zhao made an excuse to go to the stables and ran away alone.This was very abnormal for him, he wanted to catch up immediately, but he was afraid that he would be too rude in front of Yu's uncle, so he turned his head and met his mother's gaze.

"This kid, Zhao, is the most serious in his work, and he loves horses very much. He goes to see his baby every day. Marty, I seem to remember Weidec saying that Silver Sword vomited in the morning."

"Yes, mother, Yinjian has a little indigestion these two days."

"No wonder, I think Zhao is absent-minded all day long, I should let him go earlier."

"But today..."

"Yes, yes, these two days have been too busy. Mr. Zhen, are you exhausted too?"

"No, ma'am, you are too enthusiastic and you have arranged very thoughtfully."

"Where is it, my family, don't be so polite." Mother smiled and took Uncle Yu's arm. "Come on, let's go back and have a rest. There is still time for dinner." After walking two steps, the mother said again: "Marty, why don't you go?"

"I... this..." I pretended to be hesitant, but actually I was already very anxious.

"Go quickly, you are a doctor anyway, it's better that Yinjian doesn't have anything to do. You don't have to worry here, there are me and Yu, we are all from our own family, it doesn't matter."

"Then I'll go and have a look first. It won't be long. It will be ready before dinner."

There was a mother who smoothed things over, explained Zhao's abnormal mood, and allowed me to leave without being rude.

If the other party is not Yu's family, I don't care if it's rude or not, it's none of my business.I ran to the stables, the flames of anger rising in my chest.If it weren't for Yu's uncle, who brought the ridiculous secret about Yu's baptism, Dean Catherine would not be excited to officiate the wedding for them, and Zhao would not be so painful and desperate.I've only seen that kind of despairing look once, and that time Zhao vomited blood and fell ill, and almost died.But this time, I dare not think about the consequences.In the evening of summer, I was running, but I felt the cold wind whistling and shivering all over.But...but... Yu's uncle is not wrong, Dean Catherine is not wrong, just like the mother is not wrong, they love us and their children so much, the kindness, comfort, and expectation in their eyes, they are amazing Respected elders, they give the most sacred blessings to their most beloved children... Could it be that God is wrong?No!God can't be wrong!It's me who's wrong, it's us, we're the ones who are ridiculous, self-righteous, lawless, damned, damned... I stopped!

The door of the stable's indoor training ground was wide open. Zhao was in the ground, shirtless, using a shovel to shovel the sand on the ground, and his shirt was thrown on the sand beside him.The indoor training ground is the same as the fence, and it is also covered with about [-] centimeters of sand.Because it is indoors, the sunshine and air circulation are not as good as outdoors. In the rainy summer season, the bottom sand is easy to get wet, moldy and agglomerated. When the horses are practicing in the indoor training ground, because the venue is small, they will take the longest route for warming up. It just circles along the wall. After a long time, there is almost no sand in that circle. This requires manual shoveling to turn up the sand at the bottom and spread it evenly.This is what Zhao is doing now, and it is one of the most exhausting jobs in the stable.In fact, now Shao Ma, only Yinjian and Chitu, have not yet started strict dressage training.There hasn't been too much rain recently, and only when it rains or the sun is too poisonous will the horses change to indoor training.When Joseph was here, he and Zhao once turned and shoveled together. Up to now, the sandy ground on the training ground is still quite flat, and there is no need to turn and shovel at all. Zhao did this completely to vent his anger.

I told him to stop, and rushed to snatch the shovel from him.Zhao Fei ignored me, threw me away, and told me to get out.It was the first time, and it sounded harsh to me, so I got mad and took his arm and punched him.Unprepared, Zhao was hit in the chest, took two steps back and fell to the ground.I pounced on him and pinched his neck, but before I could pinch him, he raised his knee and pressed it against his lower abdomen.I go forward in pain.Taking advantage of the situation, Zhao raised his legs and did a backflip, pinning me under him.He sat on my stomach, grabbed my collar with his left hand, and swung his fist with his right hand.I parried with both hands, grabbing his fist.He swung his left hand again, and we wrestled together...

We wrestled and rolled in the sand.It's not a real fight, it has no purpose, it doesn't want to beat the opponent, it's just to vent.We would rather be beaten than hit.It was more enjoyable and more liberating to be beaten, because the physical pain distracted the mind, dulled the senses, and made the heartache less unbearable.Of course, we also like to hit people, and we like to throw our fists at each other.The fists that are swung make us feel our own strength, we are young, vigorous, confident, and strong... But we are suppressed too bitterly, too depressed... Fighting consumes our physical strength.We couldn't shake our fists, we couldn't roll over, we were on our backs, our limbs were wide open, we were panting heavily, and our heads and faces were covered with sand, mud, sweat, and blood.

"Why don't you fight anymore?"

"I'm waiting for you."

"Wait for me?" I wiped the corner of my mouth, raised my hand to my eyes, and there was blood on the back of my hand. "You mean you want me on purpose?"

"Is not it?"

"So why don't you let me?"

"I really want to kill you!"

"Hate me so much? Where did I offend you?"

"You say I was baptized. When did I get baptized? How dare you lie about that."

"Just for this?" I secretly smiled bitterly, turned over and tried to sit up. "You don't understand that as long as one of the two people is baptized, the wedding can be held in the church and be blessed by God, not to mention that Dean Catherine's enthusiasm is so high... No matter what, you can't escape this wedding. "

Zhao suddenly jumped in front of me and grabbed my shoulders, not knowing when he got up from the ground. "But we can refuse!"

"The reason? What is the reason? Say you don't believe in God, or is this marriage a joke? If you could hurt Yu like this, then there would be no wedding at all, and there would be no need to get married. You know, you know Yu will agree to any request you have. Even Chinese people can do as the Romans do. Under special circumstances, it is understandable to have intercourse first and then get married. But you...you..."

"Are you jealous?"

"Jealous?" I hugged my head and covered my eyes with my hands. "I want you to get married, I want you to have a wedding in a church and receive God's blessing. That blessing is a protection, a charm that will keep you and Yu together forever, just like you want Joseph to come back to me Same as around..."

"That's different!" Zhao yelled, shaking me. "You said, that blessing is a curse, and no one can separate those whom God has joined together."

My heart is tearing.

"Maybe I was wrong! I was wrong at the beginning! You are right, I shouldn't make things so complicated, Yu will agree to any request I ask...but what should I do? She can agree, but I can't bring it up .How can I say it? If I can say it, am I still a man?"

no way!no way!

"For now, don't think about anything, baby, at least I hope that God's blessings will allow you to survive the war, avoid disaster and death... Anyway, first live... I hope to see you in the future... ...Even if there is no place for me around you anymore... baby, can we really meet again? Is our separation really just temporary? I'm worried that we will never see each other again..."

My body was trembling, I couldn't cry, and I couldn't control the depression, grievance and fear for many days.

Zhao hugged me tightly, pressing his chin into the hollow of my neck. "We will meet, I believe we will... I will stay away from disaster, I will not die, your love has always protected me, and it will always, always will. We will definitely meet, I believe it will..."

We sit on the ground, hugging each other, but this is not a hunter's lodge, this is not a honeymoon, we can no longer indulge and indulge ourselves.After a while, we got up, my shirt was dirty and wrinkled, and a few buttons were missing, Zhao's shirt was in good condition, but his body was dirty and his shoulders were scratched.

We went to the fountain to clean ourselves.

"Marty, you know what, if you don't say I'm baptized, I literally say no."

"I know, that's what I'm afraid of."

"Sorry, I made you..."

"No, I'm not lying."

Zhao raised his wet head from the water.

"Remember the deep pool where the grouper was caught?"

"Hmm, what's wrong?" Zhao wiped the water from her hair with a towel.

"The waterfall on the pool, there were three rainbows that day. I believe God is baptizing you with the waterfall with three rainbows."

Zhao stopped and stared at me for a while. "Why didn't you say it earlier?"

"how?"

"At sunrise that day, I should have asked God to prove it for us."

"You asked the sun, the sun is the messenger of God."

"Then you say, two weddings, will God be angry? Or will he choose one?"

Zhao is not joking, he is genuinely confused, and so am I, along with the sadness, pain, fear and despair.