father - home

From the winter of 1942 to 1943, in the southern Soviet city of Stalingrad, the German army suffered the biggest fiasco since the beginning of the war. Hundreds of thousands of people were killed or missing, and countless injured.In the words of General Zeitzler, Chief of the Army General Staff: "Our loss of 10 officers and soldiers in Stalingrad is equivalent to breaking our backbone on the entire Eastern Front." Since then, the myth of the German invincibility has been shattered.War tore away the veil of glory, passion, and illusion, leaving only endless suffering, darkness, and death.Death notices drifted into ordinary German families like snowflakes, and those who were temporarily spared would feel: this winter is extremely cold!

I unloaded a large basket of groceries from the car, and couldn't help but hesitate as I climbed the steps.The mother said that Eddie's death in action has dealt a huge blow to the Yoswissy couple, and the two elderly people are still bedridden.Two wars lost two children, can not imagine their future life.Joseph survived at the cost of four fingers and one eye, but had no intention of returning home.Another family in the neighborhood also received a death notice, so what about Wedec?There was no news when my mother called last time, what about now?If I had known this was the case, I would have stopped him, I would have interceded with Schulenburg, and even Eddie.However, in the final analysis, the suffering will not stop until the war is over, and to end the war, we Germans must bear these sufferings, because our ignorance, narrow-mindedness, cowardice, and blind obedience have brought great suffering to the whole of Europe and even the whole world. an immeasurable disaster.

"Merry Christmas, sir."

"Merry Christmas! Lily."

"Merry Christmas, Major."

"Merry Christmas! Mr. Wittmann."

Lily's father took the food basket from me and moved it to the kitchen.

"Come in, master, and close the door. There's a lot of snow, it's really cold."

Now, except for Lily who still calls me Master habitually, and if she can't change her words for a while, everyone else will call me "Major" or "Sir".Strangely, no one calls me "Master".Maybe they think that if they are not married, they cannot be called "lords".

"Papa! Papa!"

Hearing this milky cry, my heart felt soft, as if it had melted. I didn't care to take off my coat, so I squatted down and opened my arms, just in time to catch the girl dressed like a ball and also like a ball. Roll into my arms little angel.

I lifted Yi'er high and kissed his tender little face vigorously.The little guy giggled and thought I was getting in the way with my military cap on, so he knocked me out with a wave of his hand.

"Heinz!" Lily stopped him.

Heinz is Yier.Because reading Chinese is really difficult, my mother called Yier Heinz.Karl-Heinz is my father's name, although it is not stated explicitly, but the meaning of my mother is already obvious.

"It's okay." I smiled, saying it's okay.

Don't look at Yi'er, he can also read words and expressions, he doesn't listen to Lily at all, he hugs me even tighter, hangs on my neck like a koala, sticks out his little tongue to lick the snow flakes on my face, and smacks With a small mouth, it's like the snowflakes are sweet.

"You really dote on him, young master." Lily picked up her military cap and wiped off the snow on it. "Stop messing around, Heinz, come down quickly." She took Yi'er off me and handed it to her younger brother Bill, who helped me take off my coat and hung it up together with my military cap, gloves and scarf.

Bill is the little naughty kid who once coaxed me to eat sour apples. Now he is a few years older and more sensible. He clearly looks at the basket of food that his father moved into the kitchen and is so greedy that he swallows his mouth. behind my sister.

"Where's Manfred?" I asked Lily.

"It's in the kitchen."

Manfred is the child of Lily and Wedek, thirteen months younger than Wing'er, and now he can only stay in the crib.

Seeing Lily's expression, I feel relieved.Weidec is fine, at least no bad news has come.

"Master, you came back very early today. I thought it would be like usual again, and I wouldn't see anyone until dark."

"Today is Christmas Eve, and I promised to cut down the Christmas tree."

"Are you joking, young master, how do you cut down trees when it's snowing all over the sky? Besides, where have you ever done that work?"

"You don't need to chop it up. Mr. Wittmann helped to chop it up." As she spoke, the mother came out of the kitchen holding the crying Manfred. "Look at them, they all ran away, just left us, bullied us and couldn't walk, right? Okay, okay, good baby, don't cry." The mother comforted the baby in her arms, but the baby Not buying it, the crying became more and more miserable.

I don't know if it was infected by Manfred, but Yi'er, who was happy just now, also burst into tears.

"Lily, is he hungry?"

"Impossible, I just fed it for a while."

"Then you should hug it, this little thing is too recognizable."

Lily hurriedly reached out to take the child, but she didn't expect that the little thing was still relentless.Now, the adults are gone.

Bill didn't know when he ran back to the kitchen to get a candy cane and gave it to Yi'er.It turned out that Bill had just noticed the large red, green and white candy cane in the food basket.

Yi'er took the candy and stopped crying as expected, teardrops hung on her long eyelashes.

Seeing that Yi'er's little hands couldn't tear the cellophane, Bill went up to help.Originally thought that Yi'er would eat by himself, but saw his small body staggeringly running up to Lily, pulling her clothes on tiptoe.

Lily squatted down and brought the baby closer to Yi Er so that Yi Er could feed Manfred the candy herself.

The baby took a lick and broke his tears into a smile. He had been crying for a long time just now, but he didn't have any tears.Unexpectedly, the baby pounced on Yi'er, hugged Yi'er's head at once, and gnawed on it fiercely.

I was shocked.The others were not surprised, and looked helpless, except for Bill.

Yi'er struggled without dodging; Lily tried her best to hold her son steady; the baby hadn't teeth yet, and after chewing for a long time, only left Yi'er with a mouthful of saliva.

In the end, everyone entered the kitchen amidst the greetings of Lily's parents, and Bill was the last.

After Weidek left, Lily's father, Mr. Wittman, came to help from time to time.Mrs. Leininger has never recovered from the grief of losing her husband. Her mother suggested that she go to Berlin to relax and see her daughter and grandson before Lily gave birth. Unexpectedly, Mrs. Leininger was killed in an air raid.Since then, the manor has been managed by Lily's parents.

Counting Yi'er and Manfred, there are eight people at the table, which is not deserted. However, the memory and worry for our loved ones make our mood full of sadness all the time. If it weren't for Yi'er and Manfred Red, these two little angels that God has given us, there will be no more laughter in this big manor.

It was late at night, and I was still tossing in the attic.

Mother opened the door and came in. "What are you doing?"

"I tried it, and this one still works, intact."

Mother glanced at the railway tracks and model trains scattered all over the floor.This is a set of electric train toys that my father bought for me when I was six years old. It has two locomotives, eight carriages, and nearly 20-meter-long rails. There are tunnels, bridges, forests, villages, stations, switches, and signal lights. It looks like the real thing. "You want to give this to Heinz for Christmas?"

"Well. There's really not much in the store right now, and I don't want to give him something from unknown sources."

"Marty, he's only a year and a half."

I froze for a moment, as if I just remembered.Yeah, it wouldn't be right to give him that right now, but... I looked up blankly.Mother was looking at me worriedly.In fact, ever since I took Yier back from the monastery, whenever I was free, I would rummage through the boxes and chests to find my childhood toys, wipe them clean, tidy them up, oil them up, and repair them. I don't know how to play, so I just give it to him.This abnormal behavior is due to fear: fear of losing!I am afraid that one day I will lose him suddenly; or that he will lose me; I am afraid that he will not have the opportunity to enjoy the joy of childhood and feel the love of his relatives.I can't give you fatherly love and motherly love, but I want to give you everything I have.

"But it's okay, Bill will play with him."

"Bill was nice to him."

"Yeah, Bill treats him like Joseph back then..."

My mother stopped in time, and I couldn't help feeling tense, but no matter what, it's better to have someone with Yi'er all the time than nothing.

"I went to see Joseph."

"How about it?"

"It's not bad, he's blind in his right eye and lost four fingers on his right hand, but he can be discharged from the army and won't go to the front line again."

"When does he come back?"

I shook my head and continued with what I was doing. "I told his attending doctor, try to let him stay for a few more days, and don't leave the hospital immediately."

Where could Joseph go if he didn't go back to the manor?He has lost part of his ability to work.I can't let him drag his mutilated body down the street alone.

"Give me the address, and I'll visit him in two days." My mother patted me on the shoulder lightly. "Oh, yes, I received this the day before yesterday."

This is a postcard from Shanghai, with a sketch of the Bund on the front and a short message on the back:

Dear Madam Marty,

I have arrived in Shanghai safely, please do not miss me.

Thank you for everything you have done for me.

Thank you for taking care of Yier.

Love you guys!

love you my baby!

Fu

☆, epilogue (big ending)

After I grew up, the title "Dad" could no longer be called out.But how much I wish, how much I wish, to be able to call you "Dad" as I did when I was a child, how I wish to be held in your arms and look up at your sparkling blue eyes.

That night, his condition suddenly deteriorated and he fell into a coma soon after he was sent to the hospital.

His story is not over yet!

The story he wanted to tell was over.For him, life without Zhao has no meaning. For more than 20 years, he has lived in the memory of Zhao; he has lived in the painful and happy memories of that period.

Joseph has always been with Mr., never leaving.

"Joseph, I will replace you tonight, you go back to sleep, you will collapse if this continues."

Joseph didn't answer, just shook his head slightly.The members of the Meissenbach family are more stubborn than each other, there is really no way.

"Heinz."

"Ok?"

"The apples on that tree should be ripe, you pick two and bring them tomorrow morning."

The husband can no longer eat, and only relies on infusion and equipment to maintain his life.I froze for a moment, then reacted. "Okay. Don't worry."

The apple tree is easy to spot with a sign on it. "Friedrich von Meissenbach, July 1897, 7 - May 30, 1918".The sign was obviously made later, and the original piece must have decayed.After 5 years and two wars, it is still luxuriant and fruitful, which makes people have to admire its tenacious vitality.

Joseph took the apple, shook it in his hand, put it under his nose and smelled it, and nodded with satisfaction.

Mr. closed his eyes, frowned slightly, his face was sallow, with an oxygen mask on his face, and a monitor attached to his body. It was not known whether he was awake or not.

"Marty, Marty." Joseph whispered twice, but there was no response.

Joseph gently removed the oxygen mask and placed an apple under Mr.'s nose. "Marty, this year's apples are big and red. You smell them, they are very fragrant."

Gradually, the gentleman's brows relaxed, his expression became serene, and two tears flowed from the corners of his slightly closed eyes.

I didn't leave that night.

Joseph kept holding Mr.'s hand, watching him intently, as if the past few decades hadn't seen enough.From time to time, he helped Mr. wipe away the tears from the corners of his eyes, stroked and kissed Mr. Mr.'s skinny fingers.

In the early morning, I was awakened in a trance by a strange movement on the hospital bed.

The gentleman opened his eyes, his hands were trembling, and there was a weak and muffled sound in his throat.

Joseph leaned forward, removed the oxygen mask from Mr.'s face, and put his ears on it.

I couldn't hear what they said, but I saw Joseph nodded frequently, his eyes were red, but there was a smile on his face.

Joseph cut the apple I brought in two with a knife, scraped out half a spoonful of puree with a soup spoon, and put it into the slightly opened mouth of the husband.

The husband actually ate it and swallowed it slowly.

The gentleman ate the apple in small bites, his eyes looked straight into the air, his face was calm and satisfied...

Mr. swallowed more and more slowly, and Joseph stopped... Then, everything was still and frozen, and a straight line appeared on the monitor, calling the police.

The doctors ran into the ward.

Before that, Joseph closed Mr.'s eyes and kissed his forehead.

Without any reminder or support, Joseph walked out the door by himself, while the doctors were making their last effort.

I followed out and saw Joseph leaning against the window in the corridor, with his head bowed and his body bent. How could he be so short all of a sudden.I walked over and put my arms around his shoulders, letting him lean against my chest.We stood in silence, Joseph was so calm, as if dead.

"He saw it." Suddenly, he said, "Marty told me that he saw Zhao. He said that Zhao was the same as before, wearing a military uniform, bathed in the morning glow, handsome and mighty, with edelweiss pinned to the brim of his hat."

Is it that dream?Mr. said he had a dream twice?

"Marty said he had waited 26 years for it to finally come, and he was so happy that it finally came true."

After the funeral, there were supposed to be many things, but firstly, I was away from home for a long time, and I couldn’t help at all; secondly, I was worried that Joseph would be too sad, and it would be bad to be idle, so I just had nothing to do all day and wandered here and there.As a result, I feel that every plant, tree, brick and tile here is different, from ordinary to unique, from ordinary to magical.They used to play the piano together in the study; chase horses in the vineyard; swim and play in the lake; look up at the starry sky on the grass... I even ran to the mountains, and the hunter’s cabin was still there, but it was dilapidated and abandoned for a long time— — They spent three days on their honeymoon here.

On this day, an important guest came to the manor, the husband's lawyer, who came to read and execute the will of the husband.

The will is very simple. All of Mr.'s property belongs to his only legal heir, which is me, without any additional conditions.

I signed paper after paper without knowing at all what other shares, bonds, real estate, trusts I owned besides Caesars.

After the lawyer left, Joseph packed up the documents and asked me, "What are your future plans?"

I leaned on the back of the chair, looked at him blankly for a long time, and then said: "You said, Fu Zhao and Yu are my biological parents, are they still alive?"

"Alive." Joseph's answer was too straightforward.He would never lie to me, that is to say... I jumped up excitedly. "How can you be sure? Do you have evidence?"

"No."

"No, you have it. Yes! That postcard! I forgot, that postcard!"

"You mean this?" Joseph took out a postcard from his pocket and handed it to me.He was already prepared.

I took the postcard and my hands were shaking with excitement.The postcard was yellowed, very old, with obvious creases, the edges were badly worn, and some of the writing could not be read clearly.

"This is Marty's spiritual sustenance, and he always carries it with him, even in prison."

"This is from Zhao."

"No, we all knew it wasn't Zhaoji's, but no one said it. Marty knew it too, but he had no choice but to numb himself."

"How come..." I flipped through the postcard carefully.

"First, if Zhao had written it, he wouldn't have written it so simply. He knew how much Marty missed him and how painful it was. Second, Zhao didn't know that your name was Yi Er, and your name was after Zhao left. Marty and Yu wrote it together. Thirdly, look at the handwriting, it’s neatly printed, Zhao didn’t need to write like this. If it’s the usual handwriting, Marty can recognize Zhao’s handwriting.”

"Then this..."

"It should be from Yuji."

"My mother?"

"Yes. In the Gestapo files, Miss Zhen Yu died in the bombing of Berlin. If Yu signed her name, it would cause trouble for Marty. Marty has been under surveillance, and he has never been someone they can fully trust. Abroad Incoming letters were checked more strictly. Yu knew this, but she had to tell us that we were safe, so she wrote in Zhao’s tone, and at the same time, she gave Marty a reason to deceive herself. Zhao told me, sure I also told Yu that what he worries most is Marty, who is alone, lonely, desperate, and loses the courage to live. Yu really loves Zhao."

"Yes, she loves him too much and knows him too well. Not only is she willing to sacrifice herself, but she is also willing to take care of her newborn son."

"Heinz!" Joseph, who had always been slow to respond, suddenly became extremely sensitive, and immediately shouted, "You know that the situation at the time did not allow it, and no mother is willing to abandon her child."

"I know, don't be angry, I was just joking."

Joseph was my kin after all, and a smile eased his anger.

"Have you not contacted me since then?"

"Later, Marty sent a letter to the address above," Joseph pointed to the postcard, "and also wrote to the home address left by Showa Yu. When Yu's uncle returned to China, Marty also asked them to bring a letter, but there was no Echo. There is no way, Marty clearly knows that this postcard was not written by Zhao, but this is his life-saving straw and the only sustenance in his heart."

"What about me?" I really hate myself sometimes. I am so old and the head of the family, but I can't help showing childishness from time to time.

"It's all my fault. Actually, I can't live without Marty. If I don't come back, where can I go? But I can't get past my own. Marty asked me to go home several times and I didn't agree. This made him I thought I didn't want to see him. So after I came back, he rarely went home."

I also blamed myself even more for Joseph's sadness.

"Since there is no contact again, how can you be sure that they are still alive?"

"It was after the end of the war that Marty was arrested and put on trial. Originally, as a colonel of the SS who participated in the experiments throughout the whole process, even if he had a good attitude of pleading guilty, confessing and exposing the crime, it was inevitable indefinitely. Unexpectedly, at the last juncture There was a turning point. The prosecutor received a letter from China, telling the whole story of Marty’s rescue of Showa Yu at that time. The testimony of the parents. Marty has always tried to protect Natalie, but unfortunately Natalie died in the death transfer of the concentration camp before the end of the war. Natalie's parents survived. Christine Schla Lieutenant Kove was conscripted from the concentration camp in the second half of '44, and he survived. Their testimony, and that of other Jews who had been helped by Marty, reduced Marty's sentence from life to 15 years."

"Did you see that testimony? It was written by my father?" At this time, my childish resentment had long since disappeared, leaving only my chest full of longing.

"I see, it was written by Zhao."

"So they're alive?"

"Of course I'm alive!"

"But it has been 20 years?" Reason told me that this is probably their wishful thinking again.

"Do you know how tragic China's war of resistance is?"

I nod.In Japan, there are very few documents and records about the war of aggression against China, but there are still some, and I have come into contact with quite a few.

"They have survived that kind of war, and these 20 years of peace..."

"Yes, that's right, they are alive, they must be alive." I couldn't help being infected.From the gray hair and blind eyes, I can see their love and hatred, and their deep affection and deep care have been deposited in the long river of time. "I'm going to find them. I decided to go back to Japan first, finish the matter there, and then go to find them, go to China to find them."