The life of a migrant worker

I can't continue to stay with everyone in the Ghost Killing Squad peacefully, let alone go back to my friends who firmly believe that I am a good person.

I hate people staring at me with strange eyes, I am often ashamed of my stupid behavior.

Since I was born, I have been suffering from inferiority all the time because of my mediocre talent, and I have always been ridiculed because of the part of me that is different from ordinary people.

I can't stay in Tokyo anymore, I can't bear to meet people I know well.

I regard everyone's tongue as a tiger, and I can't imagine how they will point fingers at me.

I'm just muddling along, indifferent to how I'm treated, but the thought of my partner treating me like everyone else, like I'm an embarrassment, sends me into a stupid panic.

I thought about death.

I have almost ended my ridiculous life several times, but because of the rescue of kind people, I was able to live in the world again.

I don't want Miss Kanae's efforts to be in vain, and I also want to live until the day I see Iori.

I want to hug Iori, want to ask her why she left me without saying a word, and want to walk with her on the street in early summer, blowing the cool wind, just like before.

But will they know?The people Kanae and Iori personally saved survived, and went to kill many more people.The mere thought that my presence might tarnish their reputation of incorruptibility made my conscience sick and painful.

But if let go and tell me to die directly.

When I think of the ghost of my mother staring at me, hysterically questioning why I obey the life she arranged for me; and the little girl with blue eyes looking at me in confusion, asking why I can't rescue her, I am more willing to go crazy .

So I plan to leave Tokyo, no matter where I go, I will go to Osaka, Kyoto, Shikoku, or Kagoshima, the southernmost tip of Kyushu.Anyway, just like before, floating aimlessly in this world, living a mediocre life.

I make a lot of money every month, but I can never keep it.

Anyway, people like me tend to attract all kinds of bad things.

When I was in Sendai, some workers got on the bus and entrusted me with an elderly woman with two infant grandchildren. Her son died of the flu and had to go back to Mito. I live in my hometown on the side.

When I was in Akita, I saw a few poor homeless students. Because their money was stolen, they could only kneel down on the street and beg passing good-hearted people to buy a ticket for tens of thousands of yuan to go home by car.

After hearing this, Aoi Kanzaki knocked me on the head, saying why she was so easy to be deceived: "Forget about that old lady, those behind are obviously liars whose routines have been used up! How can anyone Will you fall for the same trick several times in a row?"

I am willing to be deceived, even if one of them is someone who really can't go home and needs help, it is enough to satisfy people.

Xiaokui is very good at taking care of people. She always likes to make long-term and long-term plans.

Whenever she looks at me when she learns about my charitable deeds, I always feel that her eyes are full of worries about my future. One day, and then because they couldn’t save money when they were young, and they didn’t have a job to support their families when they were sick or old, they would end up alone on the street and die.

So half of my salary is used to squander, and half is saved by Xiaokui for me.

Although I always think, anyway, there is Immortal Chuan, and I usually don’t spend his savings with him by betting or other ways, like this kind of life-threatening friendship, he will not leave me alone .

But this time I don't want anything, and I plan to abandon everything I have.

I don't want to endure the residence left for me by the Butterfly House, I don't want the hands of Purgatory Kyojuro stretched out towards me, and I don't want Umo, Suma Hina Tsurumaki and the house they helped me decorate.

If I were allowed to return to Mr. Ubuyashiki's mansion as if nothing had happened, and still sit next to Undead Kawa Minya during the meeting, and let Ganroji's eyes full of joy look at me, I'm afraid I would wake up from my dream every night, as if returning home When it came time to sleep and eat at home, because I failed to live up to the expectations of others, I lost a lot of hair, and my skin was sore and sore due to anxiety.

I happen to be a heinous sinner, how could I possess others' preference with peace of mind.

I only walked in the wilderness and inaccessible places, and followed the streams and rivers.

It's ridiculous to say it, I'm afraid others will see the blood stains on my sleeves, it's human blood, it's disgusting and filthy, and it smells immediately recognizable.

The reeds in winter are withered and yellow, the stems have no water at all, and the reed flowers are snow-white, but it does not make people feel that there is much beauty at all. On the contrary, it makes me feel a little lonely and alone in the sea of ​​reeds .

I stood on the path and watched the sunset go away, and then watched the moon rise. My mind was in a mess. A small piece of dead wood on the shore rolled up.

I think this thing was probably washed here by the current from somewhere upstream. I used to hear adults tell me that these driftwoods are sometimes gathered by the river and transported by water. corpse.

That is the soul that floats up after sinking into the water after death, and will become a water ghost that can never escape.

I don't know if it's true or not, because I don't have the opportunity to be a fisherman by the river or sea.

"It's really down and out." Someone said behind me.

So I turned my head back naturally, not feeling scared because I couldn't figure out what was going on.

It doesn’t matter if you say I’m confident, I’m self-righteous, or I have eyes above the top, anyway, whether it’s ghosts or monsters, these things that ordinary people can’t avoid are not enough to arouse my special concern at all. mood.

On the contrary, what I am more afraid of is meeting people.

But in this kind of place, there are no people around for several kilometers, and they are still hanging out at such a late hour. Except for a guy like me whose head may be flooded, I can't use common sense to infer others.

So I turned around calmly, with no intention of fighting this strange thing, nor was I in the mood to communicate with others calmly. The one beside him is not the usual sun wheel knife.

What came into view was a young man, with red plum-like pupils, curly black hair like seaweed, and a careless expression on his face, which made his slender eyes reveal a condescending and wanton ridicule.

Obviously he looks like a sickly and beautiful man who is as pale as Yoya Yashiki, but I feel a kind of sick vitality from him, a kind of vitality that is not lush but very vigorous, like obeying instinct in a virgin forest Those who strangle it plunder the vines that enrich themselves with nutrients, and there is a kind of distortion and discomfort from the heart.

Noticing his unusualness, I couldn't suppress the first thought that popped into my head.

— Quite trendy, this man.

Compared with my old friend who is called the Lord of Demons and Monsters, that classical beauty who only appears in front of me in kimono.

This man is wearing a beautiful windbreaker, a bow tie, and a very neatly pressed white shirt. Even every strand of hair has a delicate curvature.

During the Taisho period of compromise between Japan and the West, many people were influenced by Western thoughts, but due to the limitation of their own aesthetic level, most of them dressed so nondescriptly.

For example, you can see a large suit on the outside of the kimono, but a Western-style black shirt with a stand-up collar on the traditional hakama, and what’s more, a kimono with a Western hat. A simple and elegant man like this can be regarded as It is rare, and if it happens to appear on most strange-looking ghosts or monsters, then it will be even more remarkable and worthy of praise.

Although this was just a whimsical thought for a moment when I was touching the knife, just such a gap was enough for me to hear the man's next words.

There was a brisk and calm smile on his face, as if he was looking down on an interesting thing with great interest: "It's really miserable. Even though you have such power, you are still forced to live by the weak... just like a bereaved dog .”

It's really unpleasant, one mouth is full of unpleasant words, presumably this person is usually very unpleasant.

"Do you know why you have fallen into such a ridiculous situation? Because you have been deceived, you are clearly a completely different creature from the surroundings, but you have been fed enough hypocritical things like etiquette, righteousness and shame by boring people, and you are bound in useless rules .”

He stretched out his index finger and tapped his temple, and slowly showed me a subtle smile: "Hesitantly looking at the moon, think about it carefully, these boring virtues have never been followed by themselves, but they make you restrain your nature and dig your own grave , played and applauded by them, fell into stupid madness."

"...I like you very much. I like you very much. I have created twelve powerful ghosts for thousands of years, but there has never been a ghost like you in life."

"I look forward to your performance after you become a ghost, maybe it will make me feel extraordinarily different."

He talked about his own affairs in front of me. In fact, I have no interest in his past. It's a pity that this man who is too egotistical doesn't have the slightest insight, and he doesn't notice my troubles at all.

Ghost dance Tsuji is not miserable.

The man who symbolizes that the obstetrician has pursued his destiny for thousands of years, unexpectedly appeared in front of me miraculously.

I should have held my sword as the swordsman was recorded 400 years ago.

This swordsmanship inherited from the swordsman Shinmon Musashi Mori Fujiwara Gennobu has not been defeated for several years, and now I have seen the back of my mentor, infinitely close to the ultimate state.

I will not be timid, nor will I fall into Ertian's first-class reputation.

But why is it like this, why is it like this?Even if I don't have a Japanese sword, even if I am no longer a swordsman of the Demon Slayer Squad, I should have swung my sword without hesitation when he finished his first sentence, and now I——

But he couldn't help himself not to think about what he said.

"Morality itself is a lie. For thousands of years, whatever I strongly desire must come true. Even if I killed thousands of people, God did not send any punishment to me...and you don't have to be forced to bear it Any moral shackles, get rid of all fear and anxiety, become a ghost, and stay by my side without restraint as you like."

The determination on his face is really annoying. I marvel that this guy is far better than my self-aware conceit, but even so, I have to envy this guy's self-confidence.

The law of nature is the law of the jungle.

Natural selection, survival of the fittest, this is the eternal truth of nature.

Animals do this, plants do this, cheetahs eat old, weak and sick antelopes do this, and banyan figs strangle trees.Often human beings will do the same, but human beings will cast a gauze-like fog on their behavior.

The essence of morality is hypocrisy.

They gave me glorious righteousness, but they were driven by this power to satisfy their own selfish desires. I pretended that such behavior did have its meaning, but I was condemned by myself all the time.

The cold darkness whispers in my ears, I was born blinded by my ignorance, even though I have fallen into such a miserable situation now——

Ah, even so, I don't hold a grudge against anyone.

I just think Wu Mi is funny, but I am ridiculous and contemptible.

Hesitant Mochizuki Mori's life is just a boring joke without any connotation, which fills up a whole page, and still won't win anyone's smile.

I am not material for reading, nor material for sword practice. My personality is eccentric and boring, and ignorance and superficiality have always surrounded me. This unpleasant fate has been manifested since I was a child.

I can't be a good person, and I can't be a bad person.

Then be a heinous ghost, if it will give me a moment's peace of mind.

I remained silent, but Gui Wu Tsuji was not in a hurry.

As long as my sword doesn't slash at him in the first moment, no matter how tightly I press the sword in my hand after that——

He already knew, he convinced me.

That's why it's so leisurely, that's why it's so leisurely.

His nails changed from human's sleek to ghostly's sharp, and he stood there smiling at me with ease.

"So, what was your reply, Hesitant?"

The moon tonight is extraordinarily large, reflected in the river, the moon in the water glows like fish scales.I couldn't appreciate such a view, but for no reason I felt that the cold winter wind was blowing my face, which was extraordinarily painful.

Am I bewitched by this young man who looks like a red plum in front of me?

No, there is no need to doubt, there is no doubt that I am willing to become a ghost, anyway, I have never done anything I really wanted to do in my life.

At that moment, all my hesitation was thrown away, and I humbled myself and swore to Kimai Tsuji.

"I have only one answer, and I will offer you infinite loyalty."