is crazy

When the first quarter of evening self-study was almost over, the stage was basically officially set up. The voice of the host had already been heard from the playground, and the sound of music was also playing. Can't wait to finish class so I can take a look at the scenery.

The classroom of the second year of high school was far away from the playground, and everyone rushed out almost as soon as the bell rang. Lin Lian didn't want to join in, but Jiang Cun stopped him as soon as he left the classroom.

"what?"

He smiled strangely and squinted his eyes to look at Jiang Cun.

He obviously wanted to say a lot, but when he said it, he chose the most merciless tone.

So frustrating.

"I want you to come out and say something."

"No need," the second half of the sentence "Who do you think you are" was suppressed after all, Lin Lian didn't know why this hurtful tone made people want to blurt out, "I don't want to talk about it."

"Then let's compete, whoever runs to the playground first."

After saying that, Jiang Cun grabbed Lin Lian's hand and interlocked his fingers, not allowing him any room to react, and rushed forward.

Lin Lian's mind went blank, he had never expected that Jiang Cun had such a tough side.

He only saw the young man in front of him leading him forward recklessly, the wind blowing his soft hair and his unzipped coat, which was embroidered with a crane, as if he It is about to rise into the clouds and go straight into the sky.

When I ran past the Junzi Library in the school, there was no one there, surrounded by antique bookshelves and books, and the warm yellow light hit them, embroidering the two teenagers with a layer of soft gold, and the summer night air was humid But ambiguous, he can only hear the sound of the wind slapping his face, the sound of heels kissing the ground, and the sound of cicadas chirping. Everything is as beautiful as a comic storyboard that spares no effort to render, which is unforgettable.

Lin Lian staggered and was pulled by Jiang Cun, seeing the thin figure of the boy under the coat, he wanted to be hugged so much.

Time was probably neglected at the other end of the library, otherwise why did he feel that the few seconds that passed by were so beautiful and so long?

To run, to sweat, to laugh wanton and indulgent, and to have a hot and clean soul.

This deserves to be called the so-called youth.

The playground of the Fifth Middle School is in the center of the school like a basin. They ran to the end closest to the stage and stopped; at this moment, no one cared about the scolding of the dean, stepped on the green belt, leaned on the marble railing, and went down look away.

Lin Lian felt that he was dreaming.

It would be great if there were fireflies around - the silvery white light reflected on Jiang Cun's face, because the two of them were still panting slightly because they were running too fast, sweat slid from the corners of their foreheads to their chins, hanging on Jiang Cun's face. With a face on his face, he looked at himself, as if he wanted to say a thousand words.

"Brother Lian."

"Ah."

After a long silence, the dance just performed by the audience began to repeat again, and by the light of the stage, many senior high school students could be vaguely seen surrounding and admiring it—they no longer needed to go to evening self-study now.

Jiang Cun pursed his lips, took out a small card from his jacket pocket, and handed it to Lin Lian.

——You see, he is always like this, he is never good at expressing his emotions, but he wants to tell the person opposite.

Very simple four words, "I miss you."

Lin Lian directly tore the card into two pieces and threw it into the trash can, stepped up and hugged Jiang Cun, buried his head deeply in Jiang Cun's neck, trembling uncontrollably.

Jiang Cun returned with a gentle hug, and his fingers conveyed the temperature to Lin Lian's back through the sweat-soaked T-shirt.

"Idiot, Jiang Cun, you are a fucking idiot.

"I miss you every day, when I sleep, and when I do my homework.

"But I really don't know what to do.

"What the future looks like, I don't know,

"I want to be with you, but I can't always make me feel that you care about me,

"I thought, let's break up.

"Then I found that I was more tired after the breakup,

"And then I started thinking about you again,

"Then I don't know how to talk to you,

"Then I found out that it was I who broke up with myself.

"Then……"

Lin Lian did a lot of "then" but didn't "then" find out why, he thought he would not be able to help crying, but found that he didn't, he was just vainly greedy for Jiang Cun's hug, unwilling to let go.

"I want to go back to the past, when I first met you, but I find that I can't seem to do it."

Jiang Cun didn't smile, kept silent, tears fell on Lin Lian's back, and he said softly, "It's nothing."

He also had a lot of things he wanted to tell Lin Lian, but the things were so many and complicated that he couldn't say anything. He knew that the two of them obviously still liked each other, but they just couldn't be together.

Sometimes after watching a TV series, the main character drags on when he can clearly explain a sentence; the main character can’t let go of the one who has clearly figured out the whole story. The story of life is far more bizarre and bloody than TV dramas.

Who the hell is the audience, we're not all just jokes being ridiculed by others.

When it happened to me, I realized that those "clear...clear..." sentence patterns are useless anyway, and there is no chance to tamper with the ending.

After the preparatory bell rang, they slowly returned to the classroom.

When parting, Jiang Cun deliberately said in a relaxed tone: "I'm leaving."

Lin Lian thought he meant that he had returned to class, but he didn't expect this to be a pun.

Lin Lian thought that he wanted to come back and reconcile with him, but he didn't expect that he came to say goodbye to him.

Lin Lian thought that the card was only used to express "I miss you", but he didn't expect the words "I might really leave you, I'm sorry" on the back.

Lin Lian thinks, Lin Lian thinks, Lin Lian thinks...

Lin Lian thought that he could think of everything, but he didn't expect that he was just one of the most stupid fools in the world.

When Jiang Cun returned to the second class, the classmates were still surprised for a while. He lowered his head and said nothing, flipping through the papers that had already piled up like a mountain.

Passerby, I seem to be just a passerby.

He thought it was a good use of the word.

He really, really made up his mind to go.

The graduation party finally kicked off under the expectations of the students. As usual, it started with a chorus of "Outside the long pavilion, beside the ancient road, green grass and green sky". Such a sad atmosphere seemed to immerse the whole school in the sadness of parting.

The sky was clear and cloudless, with a jade-like moon hanging high in the sky, and a few stars appeared rarely. The students happily moved stools to sit on the turf, and many of them took out their mobile phones to take pictures.

Lin Lian was a little bored watching the show, and he was too embarrassed to take out his mobile phone to play now that he hadn't handed it in. After thinking about it for a long time, he told the teacher and slipped away under the guise of going to the bathroom.

When I passed the second class, I happened to see Jiang Cun sitting in the outer row, and just bent down to hold his hand, but Jiang Cun stood up before him, held him, and the two left together.

Weird tacit understanding.

Lin Lian suddenly realized that the current situation was quite embarrassing, and no one told him what to do next.

Just walking aimlessly, I walked to the rooftop without knowing it.

The door was already locked, but some lost ghost had still put the key in the lock, so Lin Lian went in with peace of mind.

The night wind is blowing, the sky above the head is still blue and blue, and the color in the distance has gradually darkened. I don’t know which careless poet knocked over the ink bottle, and it rolled up together with the painter’s vermilion that was not yet dry. Be thrilling.

Lin Lian took out two mint candies from his pocket as if conjuring, peeled off the wrapper of one of them, stuffed it into his mouth, raised the other in his hand, and raised his eyebrows at Jiang Cun: "Yes?"

Jiang Cun took it kindly, put it in his hand and looked at it again and again, staring down at the sugar, as if he was going to memorize the list of ingredients.

After a while of wind, Jiang Cun finally ate the candy. The mint taste, cool, sweet and slightly spicy, suddenly reminds people of the early spring when it is warm and cold, and a large field blooms in the fields. The dandelions—whether the dandelions didn’t bloom at that time.

"Brother Lian."

Lin Lian responded, chewed the candy in his mouth, and swallowed it.

"I kept thinking about why you broke up." Jiang Cun tossed the candy wrapper over and over again to smooth it out and crumpled it again. "I seem to understand, but I don't understand...but I miss you so much."

The more he spoke, the quieter his voice became, the more trembling his voice became, and he could hardly conceal his panic, so he ended the sentence hastily.

"Jiang Cun, we don't understand, no one understands, love is like this, and there are too many people who want to understand it."

"I'm afraid I'll never see you again."

"Don't be so sensual, brother Lian is going to die or something is going to happen?"

"In case we never see each other again..."

Lin Lian interrupted him impatiently, but tears burst out of his eyes first: "Where are there so many chances? If you don't see it, you won't see it. You think you are acting in a TV series?"

Jiang Cun licked the candy lightly with the tip of his tongue, raised his eyes to look at Lin Lian, and wanted to help wipe away his tears, but he was slapped away with one hand, and his words exploded cleanly like ice balls, all stuck in Jiang Cun's mouth. In my heart: "Do you know why? Because I think you are like a wooden man and I am like a clown. You never want to tell me your sad things. If I don't ask, you keep holding back. The balloon is still fucking How about a day of explosion, how about you? Every time I worry about the life of the person I care about, even if you have the word "grievance" written all over your face, you will tell me "I'm fine" ', do you fucking think this can be considered a relationship?"

Parents teach them to be humble, united, and patient; teachers teach them to learn, to improve, and to achieve results; society teaches them to be hypocritical, to flatter, and to be selfish—but no one has ever taught them how to love and express .

No one ever told them - "How should we love others?"

Before meeting Jiang Cun, Lin Lian also liked to carry everything by himself, neither crying nor fussing, acting well-behaved and sensible.

But later he found out that this didn't seem right.

He began to become more and more silent when he needed to socialize, and gradually only put on a smile. What he wanted was never love, but preference; Great”, not a piece of sweet and sour pork that fell into his own bowl after his brother and sister shook their heads.

It turned out that being labeled as "the most obedient and most sensible" also required paying such a high price.

Meeting Jiang Cun was an opportunity. Pandora's magic box seemed to be opened at that moment. He found that person, the person who couldn't help but raise the corners of his mouth when he thought of it, and the person who wanted to take care of everything in life. The person who told him to listen has found the person who can seriously write it into the future and into the life plan...

He never realized that he could also become an annoying person, a troublesome person who wanted to cling to Jiang Cun all the time.

He began to slowly learn how to love others, but found that Jiang Cun was still so stubborn, and his stubbornness made people feel distressed.

Jiang Cun's back is always straight, no matter how tired he is, he will never hunch back, even if the sky is falling, he will stand up to pick it up, and he will not bend at all.

The scars in his heart are full of ravines, but he doesn't know how to describe it to others. He has been used to silently being with painting tools for decades, as if he has lost the function of expressing his emotions.

No, in fact, there are still some - he whispered to Lin Lian, "You brag to me", he yelled at Lin Lian, "Do you fucking think I don't want to explain?" memory...

It's just that the deeper the liking, the more worried about gains and losses.

—— "Jiang Cun, I really don't know what you are thinking about all day long. You are handsome and have good grades, and your painting skills are as good as those of our peers. What are you struggling with?"

This was Fang Zijin's evaluation of Lin Lian before he knew Lin Lian.

Jiang Cun is as clean as a piece of white paper, no one can see that he is inseparable from each other, his whole chest is filled with loneliness and inferiority complex.

He wanted to open his eyes to see the sun, and someone reached out to him, but he stopped at this moment, afraid.

When he took the first step cautiously, the man didn't have enough patience, and he was pushed back into the swamp in an instant.

The question of "love" was too difficult for him.

The theatrical performance was almost over, and it was time for them to leave. Before parting, Jiang Cun grabbed his sleeve and asked, "Brother Lian, do we still have a chance to reconcile?"

Lin Lian said, I don't know.

Then in the next second, Jiang Cun embraced him and kissed him.

The faint breath of mint wafted between the lips and teeth, and a dozen pieces of candy wrappers were scattered on the ground, which were blown by the wind and hovered in the air like dozens of butterflies flapping their wings.

"Lin Lian, goodbye."

The twilight was too deep, Lin Lian couldn't see his reddened eye sockets, he could only hear his nasal voice and words with a bit of reluctance, he hurriedly pushed Jiang Cun away, and finally ignored him.