salt by salt

It was very late when I got home, but Andre was not at home, probably somewhere to play again.He doesn’t go out much, it’s just that he’s really bored at home and occasionally goes to bars or nightclubs, and remembers to come back on time—of course, when he doesn’t come back on time, he will send a message to notify me in advance, and then he will have hickey marks and perfume smell the next day return.

The first time he came back like this, I was sitting at the dining table eating lunch slowly. I looked up at him and continued to seriously attack the sweet and sour pork ribs. The takeaway taste of this restaurant is quite good, which won my heart.He stood at the door with a sullen face for a while, and I swallowed a mouthful of food. I felt that being an older brother should care about my younger brother, so I raised my chopsticks and asked him, "Do you want to eat together?"

He glared at me, his pretty face was so gloomy that it was about to drip, and he walked quickly to the room and slammed the door, making me jump with a loud bang.

Looks like last night was not a good one.I picked up a piece of ribs and thought to myself, but since Andre has found someone outside, I will ask him to wear a condom when I make it next time-there are too many dishes, and I will send them to him later. Am I a conscientious and good brother?

Ever since I found out that Andre gave me medicine, I feel a little unhappy. Even if I have a pretty face looking at him, I'm annoyed, so it's good to go out.I threw my coat on the sofa, opened a bottle of drink and sat on the sofa to browse Weibo, but I just received a message from Lin Ya - "How is Song Cheng?"

I got interested, and I replied to her: "It's very interesting, a man, far from his appearance, especially at home who can take care of others."

She came back rather quickly, and she was probably playing with her mobile phone: Really?I just want to find someone like this for my brother, and I can handle it in my mother's company.If you don’t really like it, don’t do it. I’ll find you a better looking one, high quality and good work. If you like it, I’d like it to be easy to use. How about it?

In terms of resources, Lin Ya is really close to the water. She can't find anything in the entertainment industry, and she always promises to find me a perfect bed partner at any time.

But maybe it was the figure of Song Cheng busy in and out serving dishes in the small room today that touched me, or maybe it was the soup that really suited my taste, which made me label him as mine in my heart, no matter what She refused to give it up to others, and wanted to find a way to tactfully reject her: Doesn't your brother have someone he likes, can you do this?

Lin Ya sent a sighing expression: That's right, just like my brother's deep-rooted love, he is determined to wait for someone to turn around, why is he so stubborn?If you want me to say, bye bye bye bye, the next one will be better!

I couldn't help laughing—Lin Ya often complained to me about her brother's desperation for his first love.

"That man is my classmate, but he has a good-looking face. He keeps a cold face all day long, and his temper is so bad. My brother serves him like Jia Baoyu treats Lin Daiyu, coaxing him like a little prostration." She was angry. Gu described it as a kitten with teeth and claws, "You can't trust a good-looking person, so let's just play around. You still have to choose a virtuous and virtuous person to live at home."

"It's rare to have someone you like. Who doesn't want to go on with their first love for a long time?" I persuaded her when we had afternoon tea, "Anyway, you are still young. Some people like to enjoy themselves in time, and some like to wait carefully. You have to do the same. Respect your brother's choice."

Lin Ya's slender fingers rested her chin in boredom, looked sideways at the sunlight outside the floor-to-ceiling windows, squinted her eyes and smiled: "Let's put it this way, I don't think my brother is in a hurry—but there are people who are more anxious than me, um, No matter how you sing it, what you can’t get will always be a commotion.”

She turned her head to look at me with an innocent expression, but what she said meant something: "It's still Junyan, you can take it easy, you and my brother are two extremes. But sometimes it's not necessarily a good thing to be serious, okay?"

Because it is not in the same school district, Lin Ya and I are not in the same high school. I was able to know her in the dull and depressed adolescence, and the root cause is Yang Chen.

It's funny to say, the only person I've ever really liked is Yang Chen.

This is a scar that only Lin Ya and I know about. I once had enough beautiful and youthful fantasies, but I also endured the bloody and fragmented results.These unmentionable silent pasts have scabbed over, layer upon layer of tightly wrapped layer upon layer constitutes who I am today.

Before, I was lying on the messy bed, watching Yang Chen sitting next to me lazily puffing away, and I especially wanted to ask him: Did you know at that time?

Do you know that I like you?Do you know who the person who framed me is?Do you know that for you I have—

But the words choked up in his mouth, and his throat was sore.So I asked him for a cigarette.

I avoid talking about it.

If you really mind the answer, why did you pretend nothing happened after that and continue the relationship with friends with benefits until now; but if you really say you don't mind, I feel deeply unwilling.What I am unwilling to do is that I lost the courage to love others because of him, although this kind of courage is useless; what I am unwilling to do is that there is nothing wrong with liking someone, so why should I suffer such embarrassment and pain?

"But you like Yang Chenye." Lin Ya sat on the horizontal bar and swayed her calves. I was wearing a bloated school uniform, but she didn't care about the rules.She explained to me, "He likes to be fresh and happens to have this condition to change players. He is very famous in the circle. Don't expect him to feel sorry for you or something, and forget you when he turns around-there are countless examples of this, as long as I can remember. Your name is not bad. What's the use of liking, there are so many people who like him, but they can't be eaten. Hey, you know, he has no heart. "

In the sunset, she looked at me and said, "If you want to be with him forever, you have to have no heart."

At that time, Lin Ya only saw that I was really pitiful and persuaded me a few words. She never expected that we would become so acquainted later, and she would persuade me again that it is okay to be serious.

It would be great if I could love seriously, I think so too.

It's hard.