salt by salt

Song Cheng's bed was very narrow, with one side leaning against the wall.I was pressed against the wall by him for a lingering kiss, and I heard the sound of the rain outside the window weaken.

He kissed me a little emotionally, so I stretched out my hand to undo his belt, wanting to take advantage of the opportunity to have a more "deep" communication with him.Unexpectedly, Song Cheng let go of me suddenly, and the other hand grabbed my wrist before I touched his cock.He pecked on my lips, although his tone was gentle, but with an unquestionable rejection: "Jun Yan, no."

I was stunned: "Why?"

"Don't you think it's going a little too fast?" He said patiently, with a mesmerizing blush on his cheeks, "I mean, we've only just started dating after all, and I'd like to wait a while for this kind of thing." More romantic timing."

I smiled embarrassingly: "Uh... But I think it's very romantic now."

"Not now." He smiled slightly, "I can't let my boyfriend and I have such a hasty first time."

Hell, he wouldn't think that a successful confession means falling in love—although most people seem to think so, but I was still stunned when I heard this sentence from Song Cheng's mouth: We are talking in love?This is... about love?

In fact, before I was completely sure of my sexual orientation, I probably had a short period of love.

After Yang Chen went abroad to study, he cut off contact with me for a period of time. At that time, I had just entered university and hadn't moved out of the dormitory. People around me were eager to talk about a girlfriend.I was infected by this atmosphere, and it happened that a senior sister launched a fierce pursuit of me.

I have never liked anyone other than Yang Chen, and I am also curious about the feeling of being in love. I just have a good impression of her, but I agreed in a daze.

I was not serious in this relationship, and I even consulted with my roommate at the time for advice.But the relationship only lasted for more than a month. When the senior sister broke up with me, she told me that we were not suitable.I asked why, and she said:

"You feel too far away to me, I can't keep you."

I also accompany her to go up and down self-study like other boys do to their girlfriends, eat and walk together, send her back to the dormitory at night to sleep downstairs for a while, and occasionally create small surprises.Every step I asked myself was trying my best to create romance, but I didn't expect her to let go first.

"But Junyan, you are very kind to me, I know that." She said seriously, "I don't know how to describe it... Probably, I always feel that although you are by my side, you don't seem to put your heart on me—— — It’s not that you don’t care. It’s just that you feel sad occasionally. My boyfriend doesn’t have the idea of ​​going with me for a long time. Maybe it’s because you don’t like me enough, so you didn’t show your willingness to stop for me.”

I didn't know how to explain it, and maybe I had a vague sense that she was right, and I couldn't explain it to her.

"Girls are very sensitive."

She smiled slightly bitterly, and said sincerely: "Jun Yan, everyone wants to be with the person they like forever, but if they don't like each other, it will be too hard. I wish you find the right person as soon as possible."

"Loving each other is the most important thing, you will understand when you meet that person."

Later, when Yang Chen returned to China, we got entangled again, and I was truly sure of my sexual orientation, so I never spoiled a girl's intentions, and never had a second relationship since then.

Thinking about it now, in Song Cheng's eyes, do we count as being in love with each other?

"What do you think?"

He kissed me on the forehead and sat on the bed with me in his arms.I found that Song Cheng really loves these small gestures of intimacy. I rarely express intimacy with people like this, and sometimes I even feel a little embarrassed by his natural and frequent intimacy.

"I wonder... when will you become a big star."

Since Song Cheng already thinks so, I can only follow the trend, I can't tell him now "I don't want to fall in love with you, I just want to leave after sex".What's more, I'm quite nostalgic for his housekeeping and warm temperament. It's not a disadvantage at all to be his boyfriend for a while.

I leaned on him, and quickly brought into the role and chatted with him: "When you reach the top, you can't just turn around and throw me away."

"How come?" He rubbed his chin on the top of my head, "I'm like my dad, everyone in my family is in love."

"When will you become famous?" I said jokingly, "I want to get my benefactor to invest in you."

Song Cheng held my arm tightly, and said in a muffled voice, "Isn't it your sponsor?"

"Occasionally, I will call you a benefactor, but I'm not a real benefactor. Why are you nervous?" I said casually, but found that he didn't talk to me. I suddenly felt that I had said something wrong, and looked back at his expression, "Song Cheng? I'm joking." Yes, don't be angry."

He puffed his face, and after a while he said: "I'm not angry, but I will be very sad if you say that. Because I am useless, I made my boyfriend's life so difficult." He gently shook my hand, no She smiled sheepishly: "But this is also true. I really don't have the ability. I guess I will never be able to lead you to a good life..."

"Are you kidding me?" I raised my voice, and he looked up at me, "It's not your fault, you are not popular now, but you will be popular in the future, don't say that about yourself-I will never talk about Jin in the future The word Lord, okay?"

His self-reproach just now made my heart ache.

I have always felt in my heart that I have a good eye for seeing people-Song Cheng will definitely become popular, but there is only one chance missing.It is precisely because I believe that he will be famous in the future that I want to steal a fragrance before this flower blooms for everyone to see.If he denies his ability like this, isn't he denying me, Xu Junyan, as a person?

But after I finished speaking, I felt a little bit different about what he said, and put my hand on his shoulder: "Actually, what you said is quite...how do you say that word, machismo? Huh? Should I also say myself It's useless, can't you make your boyfriend a big star?"

His face softened slightly, and he said with a smile in his eyes: "It turns out that this is machismo. Then do you hate me for being like this?"

I couldn't help smiling: "I don't hate it." After thinking about it, I added:

"I love so much."

I chatted with Song Cheng for a while, it was completely dark outside, and the rain started to fall again at some point.Song Cheng asked me: "Sleep with me today, it's raining so hard outside, you'll get wet when you go back."

"Okay." I fell back on the soft quilt, turned over and went to the other side of the bed, "It's a pity that your bed here is too small, it's a bit crowded."

"When the weather clears, I'll go to the furniture market to find a big one." I just said casually, but Song Cheng carefully planned, "I'll move the cabinet here to the living room, and it should be no problem to put a 1.8-meter bed in the bedroom. "

I looked at him, and there was an inexplicable emotion in my heart, as if I was not greedy for his body, but really wanted to spend my whole life with Song Cheng in this small but warm house.But this kind of life shouldn't be too bad. He is so good at cooking, gentle, considerate and responsible. Spending a lifetime with him will make people look forward to it from the bottom of their hearts.It's just that this little sweet fantasy is covered with a shadow of worry. I know where this shadow comes from, so I don't want to think about it.

People live for a lifetime, only seize the day and night.